# Outrageous lies about the previous poster.
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [May 5, 2007, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875 "2007-05-05T13:03:21Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 57
### Author:  [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)
#### Post date: [May 30, 2007, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1121 "2007-05-30T23:58:37Z")
**Scribble** has an entire wardrobe of nothing but polyester doubleknit leisure suits in lime green and orange.
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### Author:  [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)
#### Post date: [May 31, 2007, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1122 "2007-05-31T00:20:01Z")
swapbear thinks he looks hot in them.
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### Author:  [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)
#### Post date: [May 31, 2007, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1123 "2007-05-31T00:38:02Z")
[QUOTE=betenoir]
swapbear thinks he looks hot in them.
[/QUOTE]
**betenoir** smells funny – no, seriously, she _smells_ “funny.” Whenever she sees the word “funny” or any of its synonyms, or something strikes her as amusing, her olfactory senses pick up a whiff of bacon grease, L’Air du Temps and Cape Cod at sunset.
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### Author:  [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)
#### Post date: [May 31, 2007, 11:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1124 "2007-05-31T11:25:46Z")
**5-4-Fighting** once applied to be the mascot for a local volunteer fire department.
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### Author:  [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)
#### Post date: [May 31, 2007, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1125 "2007-05-31T13:50:28Z")
**swampbear** keeps setting fires to give his buddies in the volunteer fire department something to do.
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### Author:  [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)
#### Post date: [May 31, 2007, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1126 "2007-05-31T14:07:52Z")
[QUOTE=Elendil’s Heir]
**swampbear** keeps setting fires to give his buddies in the volunteer fire department something to do.
[/QUOTE]
**Elendil’s Heir** set fire to all of **swampbear** ’s heirs.
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### Author:  [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)
#### Post date: [May 31, 2007, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1127 "2007-05-31T14:08:33Z")
**Elendil’s Heir** killed and ate the last Carolina parakeet. He creamed it and had it on a slice of toast.
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### Author:  [@chowder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chowder)
#### Post date: [May 31, 2007, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1128 "2007-05-31T14:11:33Z")
**Scumpup** has the largest collection of open crotch panties in the world.
He stole most of them
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### Author:  [@Lord\_Il\_Palazzo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Il_Palazzo)
#### Post date: [May 31, 2007, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1129 "2007-05-31T15:09:35Z")
[QUOTE=chowder]
**Scumpup** has the largest collection of open crotch panties in the world.
He stole most of them
[/QUOTE]
from **chowder**.
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### Author:  [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)
#### Post date: [May 31, 2007, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1130 "2007-05-31T16:23:48Z")
[QUOTE=Elendil’s Heir]
This frustrates **Cartooniverse** , who otherwise would be licking me all day long.
[/QUOTE]
–whimper–
**Lord Il Palazzo** runs the largest crotchless panties bank in Nigeria, which dovetails both of his hobbies extremely well.
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### Author:  [@Duckster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duckster)
#### Post date: [May 31, 2007, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1131 "2007-05-31T16:36:04Z")
**Cartooniverse** collects the crotch cloth from crotchless panties so he can make tiny hammocks for hamsters. The SDMB buys a sizeable percentage of **Cartooniverse’s** monthly output.
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### Author:  [@Scribble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scribble)
#### Post date: [May 31, 2007, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1132 "2007-05-31T16:42:48Z")
**Duckster** has made a pretty penny in royalties from the sale of hamster hammocks, to which he holds the patent. He has also invented the pocket scruncher (“Turn anything into lint, instantly!”), which has been highly sought-after by people whose tasteless female relatives buy things from The Quacker Factory.
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### Author:  [@Gary\_Robson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Robson)
#### Post date: [May 31, 2007, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1133 "2007-05-31T19:07:00Z")
**Scribble** misunderstood what a hamster hammock was, and turned his hamster into a hammock. He was then annoyed that it was too small to use.
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### Author:  [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)
#### Post date: [May 31, 2007, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1134 "2007-05-31T19:18:53Z")
InvisibleWombat’s parents tragically had no children that lived.
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### Author:  [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)
#### Post date: [May 31, 2007, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1135 "2007-05-31T19:27:59Z")
**Bryan Ekers** stole H.G. Wells’s time machine, then went back and killed all four of his own grandparents.
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### Author:  [@Gary\_Robson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Robson)
#### Post date: [May 31, 2007, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1136 "2007-05-31T20:17:13Z")
**Elendil’s Heir** tried to make a time machine and ended up making a thyme machine instead. On the bright side, he makes yummy pasta sauce.
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### Author:  [@rayh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rayh)
#### Post date: [May 31, 2007, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1137 "2007-05-31T21:29:40Z")
[QUOTE=InvisibleWombat]
**Elendil’s Heir** tried to make a time machine and ended up making a thyme machine instead. On the bright side, he makes yummy pasta sauce.
[/QUOTE]
Which **InvisibleWombat** uses in his Hamster and Pasta casserole.
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### Author:  [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)
#### Post date: [May 31, 2007, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1138 "2007-05-31T22:46:22Z")
So’s she does not feel left out…
**Annie-Xmas** is rarely invited into people’s homes because of her annoying habit of licking remote controls.
**rayh** , however, often invites **Annie-Xmas** over because he likes for his remote controls to be licked.
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### Author:  [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)
#### Post date: [May 31, 2007, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1139 "2007-05-31T22:59:58Z")
[QUOTE=swampbear]
So’s she does not feel left out…
**Annie-Xmas** is rarely invited into people’s homes because of her annoying habit of licking remote controls.
**rayh** , however, often invites **Annie-Xmas** over because he likes for his remote controls to be licked.
[/QUOTE]
Charles Nelson Reilly died… in _Swampbear’s bed_!!! How many 70s D-Listers will have to die before the madness stops! (I’m guessing at least _Loveboat_’s Isaac and somebody from _Carter Country_- is Guich Kook still living?)
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### Author:  [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)
#### Post date: [May 31, 2007, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/outrageous-lies-about-the-previous-poster/402875/1140 "2007-05-31T23:30:59Z")
Sampiro was in fact in swampbear’s bed when Charles Nelson Reilly died. swampbear was in the bathroom washing up. Investigations are still pending.
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