# Overwhelmed with Disorganized Living **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 9, 2011, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799 "2011-04-09T21:17:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 4:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799/41 "2011-04-11T04:00:17Z")
> [@norinew](#): > > I think the ‘not knowing where to start’ issue is where the shiny sink comes in. It’s not so much that it’s important for your sink to be clean, it’s a matter of the fact that certain people (like me!) will agonize for days, weeks, or months over the ‘perfect’ starting point, so they can do everything just right! With Flylady, you don’t have to do that, because she tells you where to begin! Yes - this does make sense; however, I think Ms. Fly may be a bit too regimented for me. Or too touchy feely. Or something. I was confused when the only actual cleaning task for 2 weeks was the sink, and she had suggested putting your dirty dishes on the floor if necessary to get to the sink to shine it. I was imagining a kitchen with a nice clean sink and 2 weeks worth of dirty dishes scattered all over the floor. :eek: FWIW, I think if a person was very disorganized and really didn’t know where to start it may be helpful to really have her holding your hand through it all - I’m more at a ‘quick tips are great please!’ stage. 🙂 ANd actually, your ‘Put one thing away before you leave the room.’ sounds like a great one. ---
**Author:** ![gone2thedogs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c67d28/32.png) [@gone2thedogs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gone2thedogs)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799/42 "2011-04-11T04:52:18Z")
I am so there. I was thinking the same thing today. I pulled out a trash bag and then just couldn’t deal. I do believe that taking one thing at a time and per day is good. But sometimes I just can’t do it. Now I’ll make another effort. Just remember it’s lots of little efforts that make a big difference. At least that’s what I tell myself. ---
**Author:** ![Cazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cazzle/32/75_2.png) [@Cazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cazzle)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799/43 "2011-04-11T05:26:25Z")
My bathroom bench was always covered with all the stuff I use daily and never quite put away - brush, deodorant, hair clips, moisturiser, that kind of thing. I bought a basket to hold all that stuff, so instead of having 15 individual items to put away I have one basket to lift in and out of the cupboard. I’ve introduced baskets to other areas that were getting away on me too. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799/44 "2011-04-11T17:28:40Z")
Here’s one of the dozens of previous threads on topic: [cleaning up/sorting stuff - In My Humble Opinion - Straight Dope Message Board](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=540082) Step 1: Stop bringing stuff home. Step 2: Start throwing stuff away. Giving it a good home (recycle, charity, etc.) is secondary to simply getting it OUT. ---
**Author:** ![Moonlitherial](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4bbf92/32.png) [@Moonlitherial](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moonlitherial)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799/45 "2011-04-11T17:57:00Z")
I was so sick this weekend I couldn’t really go anywhere or do anything so I spent one of my between nap half hours sitting on the floor of my closet with a recycling bag (for good will) and a garbage bag and a laundry basket in front of me. I think I ended up with a slightly larger mess on the floor of the closet than I started with but about half of the hanging section and 3 drawers are clean neat and only full of clothes I can wear. Apparently my closet is now the next project. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/74df32/32.png) [@The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Devil_s_Grandmother)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799/46 "2011-04-11T18:03:25Z")
> [@salinqmind](#): > > … it’s easy enough to say “throw it out” but - where? We are limited to one closed trash container per week, picked up at the curb, they don’t take rugs, wood, metal, broken furniture, ten years of old photography magazines, a set of china. Check with your city (or whoever is in charge of the trash), most places allow you to have one ot two “big stuff” pick-ups per year. ---
**Author:** ![rocking\_chair](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rocking_chair/32/2918_2.png) [@rocking\_chair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rocking_chair)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799/47 "2011-04-11T18:19:12Z")
> [@norinew](#): > > You can also think of current belonging _as well as_ potential new purchases in terms of ‘real estate dollars’; let’s say (just to keep the math really simple) that you have a 1,000SF dwelling, and your mortgage/rent/whatever is $1,000.00/mo. That means you’re paying $1.00 per month for square foot of space. Let’s further say that the object you wish to buy (or are not sure you should get rid of) takes up 6SF of space. That means you will be ‘paying’ $6.00/mo for the living space that thing takes up. Is it worth $72.00/yr to you to keep/have that item? ohhhh! good one norinew. and yes, please keep the math simple. for trash pick up, or give away pick ups… salvation army will send a truck, it is worth a call to see if they do it in your area. also there is 1800 got junk. you do have to pay for it, but it does get it out of your house. ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799/48 "2011-04-11T18:52:38Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > Step 1: Stop bringing stuff home. Step 2: Start throwing stuff away. Giving it a good home (recycle, charity, etc.) is secondary to simply getting it OUT. If recycling makes it easier to get rid of stuff then recycle. If it doesn’t make it easier then don’t bother. Keep in mind, too, that some of us are limited in our garbage output. I have to PAY to have my garbage hauled, or I have to haul it myself. Anything I can get Salvation army to pick up, the library to reuse, or Goodwill to accept is another pound of stuff I DON’T have to pay to get rid of. It’s not a matter of “call the city for that once or twice a year big stuff pick up” - _I just don’t have a city garbage service._ Period. Sure, the commercial garbage company we use WILL do a special pickup. For a price. Which I can’t afford. If I just pile it by the dumpster two things happen: 1. The garbage service won’t pick up anything outside the dumpster 2. I get fined for littering/dumping. This is why, when I had to get rid of an old mattress, I cut it apart and took the springs down to the recycling center, where I got enough money for the scrap metal to pay for the special pick up required because of the bulk of the rest of the mattress and everything else I threw out that week. This, no doubt, is not helping my efforts to clean house. _In my particular case_ recycling can help get stuff out of the house, and help pay for extra garbage hauling when necessary. Won’t claim it works for everyone. (To add insult to injury - it is now no longer legal in my area to throw out old electronics. Oh, _great_ - NOW what are we supposed to do? I’m not sure anyone around here takes that stuff. Do I break the law and just throw it out? Make sculpture out of it? What? I’m trying to contact the people who do the monthly hazardous household waste collection in the county - they don’t come to you, you take your hazards to them - but so far no answer.) Which is why I suggested alternatives to the “just throw it out!” demand. If that doesn’t quite work for you there are alternatives. Keep trying until one of them works for you. It’s not how fast the house gets cleaned that counts it’s that it _gets done_ in the end. If it takes you a year to finish, who cares? As long as you’re making progress it’s a positive. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799/49 "2011-04-11T19:11:37Z")
**Broomstick** , some stores will take in and recycle old electronics, though I think some/most will charge a small fee. I know that Best Buy and Staples are two places that will do this. ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799/50 "2011-04-11T19:15:18Z")
I will definitely look into that. Thanks. I know Best Buy takes old batteries, which is a good thing. I think I’ll pop up to their website and see if there’s specific info. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799/51 "2011-04-11T19:28:51Z")
My local Staples takes old electronics without charging anything. Just for the record, I don’t think _anyone_ gets free garbage pick-up - I have a $8 or so charge on my utility bill each month for garbage pick-up (which finally includes recycling - praise the Lord!). Tenants pay for garbage pick-up in their rent. I love my garbage pick-up here now, though - I have a [huge bin](http://www.southernmallee.sa.gov.au/webdata/resources/images/Garbage_Bin_.JPG) that can get emptied every week (I don’t put it out until it’s almost full, which takes about three or four weeks for us). Our garbage guys take extra stuff, too - I was storing some bundles of twigs in the back yard by the garbage pick-up area, not realizing they were too close. One garbage day, they were just gone. :smack: My recycle bin is another bin just as big - that one fills up in about a week or two. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799/52 "2011-04-11T19:34:27Z")
In a house with kids and unless you’re really, seriously planning to have more (as opposed to “well, we haven’t either one gotten the surgery, so an accident could happen”): anything that doesn’t fit the kids any more goes out _now_. Freecycle, recycle, give it to the SA or throw it away, but out with it. Yes, yes, it’s cute. Yes, yes, you have a whole sequence of your firstborn being dressed in those pajamas - but your youngest is now four feet tall! Throw them out! ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799/53 "2011-04-11T19:39:59Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > Here’s one of the dozens of previous threads on topic: [cleaning up/sorting stuff - In My Humble Opinion - Straight Dope Message Board](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=540082) > > Step 1: Stop bringing stuff home. Step 2: Start throwing stuff away. Giving it a good home (recycle, charity, etc.) is secondary to simply getting it OUT. IMO number one is by far the most important. At least around here at Casa de Fish we have mostly reached a level of stasis. My SO used to go every week out with a friend (who was the bitch from hell but thats another story). Eat, drink, see a movie fine. But the outing almost always included shopping as well. And not just stuff that gets used up like food or cleaning supplies. Crap from Ikea or Bed Bath and Beyond or Worthless Oriental Trinkets Incorporated. Now, don’t get me wrong. We probably did on occasion need some new towels or bathmats or whatevers. But something new nearly every week for years on end. Stuff we were happily living without. And as far as I can tell, never knew we “needed!!” in the first place. IF getting rid of crap is a problem of yours, don’t bring it in the first place! And think of the money it will save you. ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799/54 "2011-04-11T19:54:03Z")
Here’s info about [Best Buy](http://www.bestbuy.com/green)’s recycling. You have to pay $10 (each) for **televisions and monitors only** but they turn around and give you a $10 gift card for each television and monitor. I think the site says you can take up to 3 items at a time, HOWEVER, I went to my local Best Buy and said “I have about three carts full, how about that?” and they said no prob, just call ahead and double-check with the manager on duty that day. I did, and I ended up getting rid of an entire basement shelf full of old computer crap. Aside from computer stuff and monitors, I have also brought VCRs, DVD players and cordless phones there for recycling. You can donate clothes and any household goods that can be carried by one person to the [**Purple Hearts Veterans**](http://www.veteranpickup.org/) organization. Click the link to schedule a pickup. Pickups are cool because you HAVE to be ready! Another tip, if you have pets …if they have toys they don’t play with or brushes or beds or leashes or collars even shampoo that you don’t use anymore, take them to your local shelter (as long as it’s in good shape!) I know that at my house and my brother’s house, we forget to pare down the dogs’ toys and stuff sometimes. But they don’t notice when toys go away, as long as they still have something! ---
**Author:** ![SSgtBaloo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@SSgtBaloo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SSgtBaloo)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799/55 "2011-04-11T20:01:52Z")
> [@Roseanne\_Rosannadanna](#): > > What does a person do when they feel that they absolutely cannot get out from the clutter and disorganization of the stuff they live with? I’m not talking Hoarders state of living, but I’m seriously scared that starting to feel the way I feel, if we don’t get a handle on things that we’ll be heading that way!:eek: > > I can’t tell you how many times I feel like I start to get organized, get rid of things we don’t need, or find a home for things, but I don’t feel like I can make a dent. > > It’s like I just can’t mentally tackle it. The decisions are too much. And physically I just can’t do it either. Not to mention time. I’m working full-time and have two preschoolers, so other than 30 minutes here and there, I don’t have a lot of time that isn’t accounted for or that the kids don’t need me. > > If it were a few areas, it might be that I would be able to begin, but it’s an issue everywhere: Kid’s rooms, basement, garage, playroom, etc. > > My mom said people need to move every 5 years just to force them to get rid of stuff and truly clean. She’s lived in the same house now almost 40 years! We’ve been here almost 10, and at least the last 6 with kids, which really led to ridiculous accumulation. > > I guess if it were easy to “just get rid of stuff” that would be one thing, but there’s deciding what I need and what I can purge, plus what to do with it, how to find the time, etc.:smack: Been there, done that, got the tee-shirt and lost it in the clutter. What helped me declutter the most was to get some assistance in cleaning up. I swallowed my pride and asked my neighbor across the street if I could hire his kids (they used to do my lawn) to help me clear out the trash and generally clean up. I still needed to seek professional help for my depression and anxiety, but the clean house helped reduce my already too-high stress levels. Really, if you can find help, get it. If you need help to get help (I sure did) then get that, too. In my case it was a nephew who recognized I was so depressed I couldn’t figure out what to do next on almost any level who helped me get through the maze that is the VA screening system. ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799/56 "2011-04-11T20:33:14Z")
> [@xoferew](#): > > Relatives wanted to know what I wanted for Christmas so I said a subscription to Newsweek. This also seems to be an often overlooked problem when it comes to clutter. Gifts. I ended up working it out with my family and friends that no one is going to be exchanging Christmas gifts anymore (except kids, which is a new addition to the plan as the kids are new) and personally I do not want any birthday gifts. Part of the reason for this was that everyone in the family was poor but the other part is that everyone has too much stuff. I know everyone’s stuff very intimately because I help everyone move all the time. I also frown on “white elephant” gift grab nonsense game crap too because that is just an exchange of stuff. Not good. Anyway, if you and your family can’t come to an agreement about gifts, and your house is cluttered, try to ask for either consumables (food, restaurant gift cards, gas gift cards, grocery gift cards) or replacement items for things you already have (toaster, coffee maker, bath towels). Just make sure if you get the replacement, you GET RID of the original right away. As for people with kids - I don’t have any advice on kids’ presents, sorry. Well, except asking the relatives to keep some of the stuff they buy for the kids at their own homes, so the kids can have something to play with there (and not clutter your house!) ---
**Author:** ![Zyada](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zyada/32/3028_2.png) [@Zyada](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zyada)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799/57 "2011-04-11T22:34:08Z")
Re electronics recycling - I think I saw an ad that said that Staples will take Dell items for free. Lots of good ideas here. I’ll add a point to the “Just do 30 minutes” advice - \*get a timer \*(or use your oven timer) and set it to 30 minutes. Better yet, set it to 10 minutes and make it a game to see how much you can get done in that amount of time. (You will almost assuredly surprise yourself) I’m in the middle of the great Craft Room Shuffle. We moved our computers into the den this past year, so I’m moving the craft room to the room we had the computers in. Because I worked for a major arts&crafts supply company for 7+ years, I have [lots](http://zyada.livejournal.com/tag/sample%20sales) of craft supplies, most of which were already in boxes or in unorganized heaps. I’ve been re-packing the boxes while discarding wrapping and putting items I don’t want into the goodwill closet. Next up is to pack all of the small loose items. Boxes are going into the bedroom until I’m ready to unpack. Then comes the fun part - all of the items that are too heavy or too big to box up have to be moved out of the two rooms so that I can clean up the destination room, arrange the furniture, and put in as many shelves as I can stuff into the room. One box at a time, though ---
**Author:** ![raspberry\_hunter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b19c9b/32.png) [@raspberry\_hunter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raspberry_hunter)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799/58 "2011-04-11T22:40:06Z")
> [@Broomstick](#): > > (To add insult to injury - it is now no longer legal in my area to throw out old electronics. Oh, _great_ - NOW what are we supposed to do? I’m not sure anyone around here takes that stuff. Do I break the law and just throw it out? Make sculpture out of it? What? I’m trying to contact the people who do the monthly hazardous household waste collection in the county - they don’t come to you, you take your hazards to them - but so far no answer.) Every so often our county has a Free Electronics Recycling day. I don’t know how you find out about it, though, as I usually find out about it by accident or by driving past the parking lot where they set it up. My workplace will also take old electronics – the IT guys are always getting rid of lots of old computers and things and it’s no big deal for them to take a little extra stuff as well. Perhaps yours might too, or perhaps you know someone who works for a techie-ish company who might? > [@ZipperJJ](#): > > As for people with kids - I don’t have any advice on kids’ presents, sorry. Well, except asking the relatives to keep some of the stuff they buy for the kids at their own homes, so the kids can have something to play with there (and not clutter your house!) My family has moved to the Amazon-list style, so we only get things we actually need or at least want more than the crap we were buying for each other before. My husband’s family is struggling to move to that model, although his mom is taking some convincing… she doesn’t want presents herself, but she wants to give them to her grandkids! Sigh. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799/59 "2011-04-11T22:41:47Z")
> [@ZipperJJ](#): > > This also seems to be an often overlooked problem when it comes to clutter. Gifts. > > I ended up working it out with my family and friends that no one is going to be exchanging Christmas gifts anymore (except kids, which is a new addition to the plan as the kids are new) and personally I do not want any birthday gifts. > > Part of the reason for this was that everyone in the family was poor but the other part is that everyone has too much stuff. I know everyone’s stuff very intimately because I help everyone move all the time. \ Agreed - in my family, we’re all in our forties, we all have good incomes and plenty of stuff, there is not one damned thing that any of us NEED - I am all for gift exchanges become consumables only, or nothing at all. **Zyada** , my next big organizing project is the utility room here. I need a bunch of shelves put up on the walls so everything can go on the shelves, but first we need to insulate the walls, but we’re getting there. Almost one whole wall done. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799/60 "2011-04-11T23:00:45Z")
Good news - I not only finished up my taxes today, I also cleaned out a big storage crate. Yay! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/overwhelmed-with-disorganized-living/577799.md?page=4)