# Palin vs Putin: who'd win? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 3, 2008, 7:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/palin-vs-putin-whod-win/461839 "2008-09-03T07:46:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/palin-vs-putin-whod-win/461839/21 "2008-09-03T20:24:29Z")
> [@Tom\_Tildrum](#): > > Let’s keep in mind that there’s one US official who’s enough of a badass to have once shot an old man in the face. If Putin got past Palin, he’d still have the boss monster waiting for him. Now you’re upping the ante. If Palin gets Cheney on her side, Putin at least gets a Spetsnaz unit and Red Grant, the psycho SMERSH executioner from the James Bond novel _From Russia With Love_. ---
**Author:** ![China\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/779978/32.png) [@China\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/China_Guy)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/palin-vs-putin-whod-win/461839/22 "2008-09-03T22:34:41Z")
Puin was the judo champion of St Petersbur (IIRC), which has a population greater than Alaska. ---
**Author:** ![ultrafilter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/3d9bf3/32.png) [@ultrafilter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultrafilter)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/palin-vs-putin-whod-win/461839/23 "2008-09-03T23:58:11Z")
> [@Oy](#): > > But she has been very physically active and I think I read that she works out. Putin has spent most of his career as a bureaucrat, hasn’t he? So there’s still a good chance that Palin might take him. [Vladimir Putin](http://www.elpais.com/recorte/20070814elpepuage_7/LCO340/Ies/Vladimir_Putin_pesca.jpg). For a bureaucrat, he’s in pretty good shape. In particular, check out his torso. He may not be sporting a six-pack, but that’s not just fat making his waist thick. ---
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2008, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/palin-vs-putin-whod-win/461839/24 "2008-09-04T15:54:30Z")
In combat, I’d pick Putin. In a debate, I’d pick Putin. In a running race, maybe Palin. ---
**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2008, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/palin-vs-putin-whod-win/461839/25 "2008-09-04T16:10:48Z")
> [@Tom\_Tildrum](#): > > Let’s keep in mind that there’s one US official who’s enough of a badass to have once shot an old man in the face. If Putin got past Palin, he’d still have the boss monster waiting for him. 😃 😃 😃 I love it when the Dope’s on form! ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2008, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/palin-vs-putin-whod-win/461839/26 "2008-09-04T23:59:20Z")
> [@Tom\_Tildrum](#): > > Let’s keep in mind that there’s one US official who’s enough of a badass to have once shot an old man in the face. If Putin got past Palin, he’d still have the boss monster waiting for him. Like Putin would carry Holy Water to battle Undead… ---
**Author:** ![Brunhilda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/cdc98d/32.png) [@Brunhilda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brunhilda)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2008, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/palin-vs-putin-whod-win/461839/27 "2008-09-05T03:20:21Z")
Hmmm…Full disclosure, t’s not in me to root for the head of the KGB and the guy who is threatening to drop the iron curtain again. So my money is on Palin. I think everyone is taking the wrong tack. Palin lures Putin in with a damsel in distress act, pouts, claims that Alaska has run out of oil, and therefore Alaska is seeking reunification with Russia. Putin comes over for negotiation. As he approaches, Cheney pops out of the duckblind and shoots him. Palin field dresses him like a moose, carries him slung over her shoulder, and drops him in McCain’s lap. No contest. ---
**Author:** ![Grumman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/43a26b/32.png) [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2008, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/palin-vs-putin-whod-win/461839/28 "2008-09-05T03:35:57Z")
> [@Brunhilda](#): > > Palin lures Putin in with a damsel in distress act, Do the words “Komityet Gosudarstvennoy Bezopasnosty” mean anything to you? I don’t think Putin’s the sort who would fall for that kind of trick. ---
**Author:** ![Brunhilda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/cdc98d/32.png) [@Brunhilda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brunhilda)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2008, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/palin-vs-putin-whod-win/461839/29 "2008-09-05T03:43:56Z")
Actually they don’t; fight my ignorance please! ---
**Author:** ![Grumman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/43a26b/32.png) [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2008, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/palin-vs-putin-whod-win/461839/30 "2008-09-05T03:56:12Z")
> [@Brunhilda](#): > > Actually they don’t; fight my ignorance please! You know, the KGB? The Soviet Union’s intelligence agency? ---
**Author:** ![Oy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bc8723/32.png) [@Oy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oy)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2008, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/palin-vs-putin-whod-win/461839/31 "2008-09-05T04:03:17Z")
> [@Grumman](#): > > You know, the KGB? The Soviet Union’s intelligence agency? YOu mean the one Putin used to be a big part of? ---
**Author:** ![Grumman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/43a26b/32.png) [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2008, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/palin-vs-putin-whod-win/461839/32 "2008-09-05T04:17:25Z")
> [@Oy](#): > > YOu mean the one Putin used to be a big part of? Brunhilda’s the one who seems to think catering to Putin’s strengths is the way to go. It’s like challenging Chuck Norris to a roundhouse-kicking contest. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2008, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/palin-vs-putin-whod-win/461839/33 "2008-09-05T04:40:22Z")
> [@WormTheRed](#): > > It was a National Park, not a Zoo. I doubt they need to put satellite trackers on animals in a Zoo. More info in this [link](http://news.yahoo.com/story//nm/20080831/wl_nm/russia_putin_tiger_dc_1) > > (maybe if it was a really big Zoo, but I still doubt it). But how far can a tiger get with one of these Soviet era [tiger tracking devices](http://earthfirst.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/tiger.jpg) strapped to it? ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2008, 6:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/palin-vs-putin-whod-win/461839/34 "2008-09-05T06:14:43Z")
My money’s on Pooty Poot. He’ll just offer her some polonium tea to go with her moose cookies and it’s Game Over. ---
**Author:** ![Queen\_Bruin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Queen\_Bruin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Queen_Bruin)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2008, 7:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/palin-vs-putin-whod-win/461839/35 "2008-09-05T07:45:19Z")
Putin would just have a crony sneak up to Palin with a hypodermic full of sedatives. He wins on sneaky. W/O sneaky (and on pure chutzpah) my money’s on Palin, as much as my NOW card toting-self would like to ignore. I think in hand-to-hand, Putin would go down like a USC cheerleader at Rush Week. ---
**Author:** ![WormTheRed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/bbe5ce/32.png) [@WormTheRed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WormTheRed)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2008, 9:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/palin-vs-putin-whod-win/461839/36 "2008-09-05T09:14:57Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > But how far can a tiger get with one of these Soviet era [tiger tracking devices](http://earthfirst.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/tiger.jpg) strapped to it? Brilliant! Here I was getting a bit upset, going to tell you to read the article again - and then I wind up with coffee all over my keyboard! Absolutely brilliant my dear sir! ---
**Author:** ![Oy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bc8723/32.png) [@Oy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oy)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2008, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/palin-vs-putin-whod-win/461839/37 "2008-09-05T14:20:31Z")
> [@Queen\_Bruin](#): > > Putin would go down like a USC cheerleader at Rush Week. As a purely OT issue, don’t you think if you were a cheerleader or sorority girl, unless you were looking for recreational sex, that you’d swear off sex except with a longstanding boyfriend if you were straight and it were Rush Week? I mean, it’s only a week, and I sure wouldn’t want to be on somebody’s “nail the most cheerleaders/sorority girls” list! Of course, perhaps that’s a moot point with a lot of college guys anyway, since they kind of maintain them on their own. ---
**Author:** ![Snarky\_Kong](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a183cd/32.png) [@Snarky\_Kong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snarky_Kong)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2008, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/palin-vs-putin-whod-win/461839/38 "2008-09-05T14:41:49Z")
> [@Oy](#): > > As a purely OT issue, don’t you think if you were a cheerleader or sorority girl, unless you were looking for recreational sex, that you’d swear off sex except with a longstanding boyfriend if you were straight and it were Rush Week? I mean, it’s only a week, and I sure wouldn’t want to be on somebody’s “nail the most cheerleaders/sorority girls” list! Of course, perhaps that’s a moot point with a lot of college guys anyway, since they kind of maintain them on their own. Dude, cheerleaders have their own list of getting nailed by the most athletes/guys who claim they’re athletes. /All in good fun, no offense to cheerleaders. ---
**Author:** ![Oy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bc8723/32.png) [@Oy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oy)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2008, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/palin-vs-putin-whod-win/461839/39 "2008-09-05T14:47:53Z")
> [@Snarky\_Kong](#): > > Dude, cheerleaders have their own list of getting nailed by the most athletes/guys who claim they’re athletes. > > /All in good fun, no offense to cheerleaders. Dudette. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/palin-vs-putin-whod-win/461839.md?page=1)