Parents getting infants ears pierced.

The BBQ Pit
61

Just to answer the OP without reading the whole thread…

I think piercing infants ears is a bad idea, but I’m not coming from an objective place - I remember being at kindergarten (4 years old), and my mother saying “Look at that baby with the pierced ears. That is so wrong. The mother should be shot”. Therefore, from that very first baby I ever saw with pierced ears, I have had negative associations with it.

If I was to try and be objective, I’d probaby be against it, because earrings are a catching hazard. I remember seeing a girl at school tear her ear open when her sleeper caught on a brick as she ran past a wall (not a large earring, just a close brush with a wall). I would think it’s best to wait until a child is out of the stage where they run around like crazy things in the playground.

I was 13 or 14 when I got mine done, and my best friend was allowed to get hers done at the same time. It hurt, but we didn’t care because we wanted pierced ears. We thought we were beautiful when it was done! We were careful to look after them properly and use the stuff the chemist gave us and turn the earrings regularly, like we were instructed to. If I’d had my ears pierced as an infant, I wouldn’t have had the thrill that I got when I was finally allowed to have it done. I think early teens is a good age to have it done (yeah, I’m so terribly objective :rolleyes:)

On a side note, my mother didn’t have pierced ears until I was nearly a teen. She always said if we were meant to wear earrings, we’d be born with holes in our ears. I don’t know why she changed her mind but eventually she did. However, this would be part of the reason for her criticism of the baby with pierced ears - she was really against earrings for everyone, not just babies. I don’t know how she would feel about that now, but I’d guess she still feels that you should wait until your child is a teen and wants pierced ears.

62

But it IS wrong to get them declawed…

63

Yes it does, but Western civilization doesn’t contain the belief that infants need to have ear rings.

First off, you are twisting my words. No where did I say that there was no Western culture. If you want to get on your soapbox about it, that’s fine, but don’t put words into my mouth. That is not what I was saying or even what I implied. If you inferred it from what I said, let me know what I need to be more clear on so that you can be happy.

I’m not sure what you are referring to as Western culture. At least in the USA, there is no single culture. There are many different cultures as well as instances where there are combinations of two or more other cultures creating an entirely new on.

At least in the culture I was raised in, getting ears pierced was a rite of passage. It was not mandatory, but it was common. This was an indication to the girl that she was growing up and maturing.

As far as I know, there is no significance to getting an infants ears pierced (again referring to my culture). If someone did it, they wanted their baby to look “pretty”. Possibly, they were tired of people confusing their girl for a boy. Although I doubt this would cause gender issues for the girl later in life. It only seems to make the parents happy.

64

I can’t sleep in my earrings (even small studs) because it really, really hurts. My ears aren’t abnormal in anyway, but the lobes get squashed up against my neck/cheek/pillow, it all digs in, and it’s hell.

I would hate to think of such discomfort for a small baby with such delicate skin that babies have.

So do you take the earrings out at night, or what?

Personally I would never unnecessarily modify the body of someone too young enough to be able to express consent/dissent. The very thought appals me.

65

as·sim·i·late 1 a : to take in and appropriate as nourishment : absorb into the system b : to take into the mind and thoroughly comprehend 2 a : to make similar b : to alter by assimilation c : to absorb into the culture or mores of a population or group

Yup, that was the word I meant to use.

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by LaurAnge *
**

Oh very cool. I am impressed by your virgin ears! (Not being sarcastic here.)

[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by KarlGrenze *
**

Hmm, my 4 year daughter still gets called “he” half the time and her hair long enough for her to sit on. I don’t think Katie wants me to have someone pierce her ears to avoid confusion. And, what should I have done for my boy when he was a baby? I had a lady almost yelling at me in Las Vegas that “he is too pretty to be a boy! Put him in a dress!” ( No, you raving daffy papsmear of a woman! No, I’m not gonna put my son in a dress! If he’s going to wear a dress let it be at an age when he can make that choice for himself!)

66

Or, it is that to me things that would otherwise be silly become less so if someone is doing it for religious or cultural reasons. If someone were to walk up to me in spring and say “for the next 46 days I’m going to be a vegetarian. I think it would be cool,” I would think she was strange. If someone else said “I’m giving up meat for lent,” it magically becomes ok. Sticking a fake plastic tree in your house and covering it with lights and bright shiny things is odd (doing the same with a living or recently cut down tree is even more so) - doing it for Christmas (whether that’s religious or cultural tradition to the tree decorator) makes it normal.

Harmful things are still harmful, regardless of culture. But yes, if you stick the word “tradition” on something that might otherwise be strange, I will mentally “ok” it as I understand that tradition often means doing things that don’t quite make sense normally. But if someone who doesn’t have the same tradition or beliefs does the same thing, they don’t get the same mental “ok.”

67

Thanks :). And with this response comes my opinion on the issue: metal through skin is gross. If other want to do it, that’s their prerogative. But not way am I doing it to myself or anyone else.

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[minor hijack]
This is the single funniest thing I have read in weeks. Very nicely done. :smiley:
[/minor hijack]

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Dilbert posts:

I would say being attractive is a benefit. Thus I would (and did) have my daughter’s ears pierced for the same reason I had my own pierced. Also why I dress her in what I consider to be attractive clothing, encourage her to bathe regularly, and let her spend hours on her hair.

Religious? Probably. Cultural? Not by any definition that could hold water for five minutes. It is part of the “culture” in my family that women have their ears pierced. How many other votes do I need to get before it becomes culturally valid? I am the head of my family, so the culture is whatever I say it is.

Just because I’m shallow. :slight_smile:

70

I wasn’t doubting that it was the word you meant to use. I just don’t agree with the negative connotations of that word as applies to this situation. Just because I have pierced ears does not mean that I have been altered from my natural state to become a faceless android of popular culture.

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racin, actually I was using it to show the hurry most pre-teen and teen girls were in to be “accepted” and become part of “the crowd”, especially myself at that age. I’m sorry the word has negative connotations for you, but it is a just a word and aside from the Star Trek connection, not a particularly negative one in itself. I applied the term to myself, and not to the public at large. I think, in part, I was somewhat assimilated by getting my ears pierced. You do not. To some extent, popular and past culture does influence me. Everything from the clothing I wear to my favorite radio station and movies I watch are influenced somewhat by it. [sub]I wish I could live in my natural state, but it’s hard to find a good Cabernet when you’re naked in the woods.[/sub] I am sorry that particular word struck you as offensive, as that was not my intention.

72

What benefit? And more specifically, for a child?

Definition for Culture:

From: http://www.dictionary.com/cgi-bin/dict.pl?term=culture

Here is the relavant portion of your defintion.
1
a. The totality of socially transmitted behavior patterns, arts, beliefs, institutions, and all other products of human work and thought.

b. These patterns, traits, and products considered as the expression of a particular period, class, community, or population: Edwardian culture; Japanese culture; the culture of poverty.

c. These patterns, traits, and products considered with respect to a particular category, such as a field, subject, or mode of expression: religious culture in the Middle Ages; musical culture; oral culture.

d. The predominating attitudes and behavior that characterize the functioning of a group or organization.

You definition of culture could possibly hold water under part d if taken alone and not as the whole. However, from this defintion culture would be bigger than your family. If, in a town, infants got their ears pierced, that would be a cultural part of that town. Most likely it would have become that way for a reason.

That being said, I’m not here to argue over the defintion of culture.

How about if I drop religion and culture all together and say that piercing the ear of a child is more acceptable (in my opinion) if there is a reason larger than individual desires. However, I don’t think it is a good idea under any circumstance, but I admit that there are circumstances where I find it less disgusting to me.

73

Man, I must really be shallow for wanting my ears pierced. Of course, I smoked because I thought it made me look cool, so… :wink:
Something I forgot to mention- wayyyyyy back at the beginning of this thread, jarbabyj mentioned a woman who pierced her pet deer’s ears, and nobody called PETA, I was surprised to note. But it reminded me of something vaguely nasty.

This may be TMI for animal lovers, so check yourself-

Our old vet had a couple of dogs that came to the office with him every day. I think one was a Greyhound and one was a Weimereiner (spelling?), but I’m not sure. The point is that both of these dogs had their ears pierced!!! Either one ear or both, with thick hoops like you see people wearing in their belly button pierces.

Ick.

74

I think it’s wrong to intentionally cause a child (well, any person, really) pain for silly reasons.

I think that “but it makes him/her look cute” is a silly reason.

Of all the wrongs in the world, though, it’s pretty near the bottom of my personal wishlist to see fixed.

I’m also finding myself wondering if someone could market a tugahoy-equivalent to close up the little piercing-holes from those folks with ears that don’t heal over. I’d want to use some catchy name like the hEar-Ahoy![sup]TM[/sup]. Venture capital would be welcome. No return on investment is guaranteed.

75

True story I once read in the newspaper years and years ago: A young mother went to a mall in Central Florida to get her ears pierced and her baby’s ears pierced. She could get her baby’s ears pierced but she couldn’t get her own ears pierced because she was under 18…

76

Well, I have four piercings in each ear currently. All of my piercings have been done with a piercing gun.

I remember getting them pierced at the mall when I was very young, after begging my parents… probably around seven years old. My earlobe actually became so swollen that the back of the earring went inside my ear. They healed over and I didn’t get another piercing until I was about 14 I guess. I kept that one clean, and it was fine, and I got another at age 15 or 16 just above the first. I also got a third piercing above the first two, and an upper cartilage piercing, at once right after I turned 18. I let them heal totally, and after about two months I put sterling silver hoops in all four holes and I never take them out. I wear a pair of earrings for about a year until they tarnish too much, then throw them out and replace them. I haven’t had any problems at all, except that they DO get swollen or drain but only when I use non-gold or -sterling silver earrings and I take them in and out frequently.

Eventually I want to fill in the gap between the bottom three and the top one, so that I have a little line of eight silver hoops going down my ear. (I really like the look, nothing to gaudy, but still very decorative.) The bottom piercings didn’t hurt at all; the cartilage piercing did sting a little, but nothing that could really be considered pain.

I worry more about the girl doing the shooting getting it in the right place.

As for babies, if the parents take good care of it, I don’t see why not. Earrings aren’t permanent like tattoos. On the other hand, I think perhaps seven and eight year olds aren’t so good at taking care of earrings, so you might want to make them wait until they are a bit older. :wink:

77

Well, there is no getting around the fact that having an infants ears pierced is solely for the enjoyment/vanity/whatever of the parent.

I mean, the infant has no comprehension of it either way.
That said, It doesn’t bother me, I just think it’s a bit silly, as if they feel a need to “decorate” the baby.

Flame away…

78

Wow…talk about your hotly debated topic. I’m a guy…and my mom first asked me if I wanted to get my ears pierced when I was 10. Didn’t want to at first, but quickly warmed up to the idea. First guy at my elementary school to have it done. Regretted it in the middle of grade 10, when the other kids mocked me, so I took em out. Healed over, and then just got them repierced in grade 12. My ears got infected the first time…quite badly.

Anywho, if I remember correctly, when you sign the waiver to have your ears pierced, you’re consenting to minor surgery (at least in Canada, that’s what it’s called). Personally…I think that unless the child can understand the ramifcations of what’s going on, and unless the child NEEDS it…just don’t do it. However, it doesn’t exactly upset me for parents that have done it. I’d like to see a person who’s parents had their ears pierced at an early age grow up hating them (earring or parents).

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[hijack]
Tequila Mockingbird, for many people, and quite unrelated to the Trek reference, the term “assimilate” when speaking of cultural/social issues has connotations that are muy negativas.
[/hijack]

And as to the subject… I come from a community where it is common. I myself find it quite silly, specially since at one point or another the wearing of the earrings stops for a while and they just have to redo the piercing all over again around puberty. But I got bigger fish to fry, really. I suppose I can’t blame those who may be a wee bit put off by the venom spewed by those who think it’s some sort of atrocity.