# Parents, how do you deal with the issue of farting with your children? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 28, 2016, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426 "2016-03-28T02:36:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2016, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426/21 "2016-03-28T23:05:52Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > Don’t they eventually explode, then? Heavens no. I raised them **right**. If my kids fart, they’re grounded for a week. No exceptions. ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2016, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426/22 "2016-03-28T23:10:34Z")
I never said anything much except “Quit farting on your sister!” and “Don’t use your butt as a weapon!”. My oldest daughter is a prude and would never intentionally fart on or anywhere near someone. Her younger sister however, acts like she was raised by Jenny McCarthy. She only does it at home though (as far as I know) so it is an internal matter and not a public disgrace. ---
**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2016, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426/23 "2016-03-28T23:37:36Z")
> [@Spiderman](#): > > **Jack Batty** you should be ashamed of yourself; teaching kids incorrect things like farts come from fingers when they _really_ come from the purple elephant that just snuck under the sofa / bed / dining room hutch. Barking spiders! Who stepped on a duck? At home, it’s a joke. In public, I figured peer pressure would learn them faster than I could. Whaddaya know? It worked. (We may have occasionally told them to say “excuse me” while at Grandma’s house. Expecting a 3-4 year old to have much control over farts is a waste of time.) ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2016, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426/24 "2016-03-29T00:04:44Z")
> [@Seanette](#): > > In my family, we just automatically blamed a convenient dog (we always had several). 🙂 Unfortunately, we didn’t have a dog to blame. So, we blamed _Flipper_, our pet goldfish. Ironically, Flipper actually \*was \*always guilty of the crime—he lacked the intestinal enzymes needed to properly break down his favorite foods (cabbage and broccoli)…and he _was_ a very rude fish. ---
**Author:** ![jz78817](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jz78817/32/1028_2.png) [@jz78817](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jz78817)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2016, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426/25 "2016-03-29T00:15:28Z")
hold a contest to see who can crack off the loudest one. ---
**Author:** ![purplehearingaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7bcc69/32.png) [@purplehearingaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehearingaid)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2016, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426/26 "2016-03-29T01:27:08Z")
> **[NaturalHealth365](https://www.naturalhealth365.com/)** > > Natural Health 365 is one of the premier sources of natural health news available on the internet. Scientific Solutions, Proven Results. Holding your farts in is bad for your health . You can tell your child if feel like fart is coming on they should into the bathroom and fart or leave the room . No has dies from smelling someone fart . I had clients fart right on me when I was a health aide . I couldn’t tell a 80 or 100 yo person to hold their farts in. ---
**Author:** ![spamforbrains](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@spamforbrains](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spamforbrains)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2016, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426/27 "2016-03-29T02:07:04Z")
> [@](#): > > [http://www.naturalhealth365.com/flatulence.html/](http://www.naturalhealth365.com/flatulence.html/) > > Holding your farts in is bad for your health . um, actually, diverticula are not caused by holding in farts. The fart-gas is in your rectum. The diverticula are in your colon. Lack of fiber, obesity, and lack of exercise are leading contenders for their cause. > **[Diverticulitis - Symptoms and causes](https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/diverticulitis/symptoms-causes/syc-20371758)** > > This common colon disease develops when small pouches form in the colon wall and become inflamed, causing pain, fever and abnormal stool function. ---
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2016, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426/28 "2016-03-29T15:11:06Z")
> [@purplehearingaid](#): > > [http://www.naturalhealth365.com/flatulence.html/](http://www.naturalhealth365.com/flatulence.html/) [naturalhealth365.com](http://naturalhealth365.com) isn’t exactly my first stop for reliable medical information. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Kinthalis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kinthalis/32/16084_2.png) [@Kinthalis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kinthalis)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2016, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426/29 "2016-03-29T17:34:41Z")
My little guy is just 2, so I’m not even bothering to start until he’s potty trained (we’re starting on that now). Right now, he just goes when he goes, he doesn’t make a big deal. However, if he catches daddy letting one lose, the neighbors will know in 2 seconds flat. “DADDY POOPOO’ED! MOMMY, DADDY POOPOO’ED!!” ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Tildrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e95f7d/32.png) [@Tom\_Tildrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Tildrum)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2016, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426/30 "2016-03-29T18:29:14Z")
At work, I just excuse myself and go into the elevator. > [@Kinthalis](#): > > “DADDY POOPOO’ED! MOMMY, DADDY POOPOO’ED!!” For a while, mine would introduce me to people in a similar way. “Daddy pees!” ---
**Author:** ![SUZ\_MAC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8e8cbc/32.png) [@SUZ\_MAC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SUZ_MAC)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2016, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426/31 "2016-03-29T20:31:36Z")
I don’t recall having a “farting” protocall or speech. However, my dad was the main culprit in the family and whenever he would cut the cheese my mom would say in a very obstinate manner “HANK … Well I hope you feel better”. We got the message loud and clear that she was disgusted by it and that it was something not to be shared with others. One story I recall is when I first moved in with a boyfriend who thought farting was hysterical and did it often. The first time I let one go (and it was a room clearer) he jumped off the couch with the most shocking and disgusted look on his face that I knew our relationship was doomed. I was right. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2016, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426/32 "2016-03-29T21:03:08Z")
> [@SUZ\_MAC](#): > > One story I recall is when I first moved in with a boyfriend who thought farting was hysterical and did it often. The first time I let one go (and it was a room clearer) he jumped off the couch with the most shocking and disgusted look on his face that I knew our relationship was doomed. I was right. [Breaking the Barrier](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jkmw9oGIDhI)😃 ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2016, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426/33 "2016-03-29T21:12:46Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > Don’t they eventually explode, then? Oddly enough, this video just popped up on youtube… [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/mud4wqk_p4M/maxresdefault.jpg "Pressure Cooker Valve") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mud4wqk_p4M) ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2016, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426/34 "2016-03-30T03:37:56Z")
I explained to them about the barking tree spiders. I also taught them to yell, “Who fired that shot?” ---
**Author:** ![TBG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c89c15/32.png) [@TBG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TBG)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2016, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426/35 "2016-03-30T21:05:14Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > My kids don’t fart. I raised 'em right. Your kids are probably sneaking off farting in an alley somewhere with the “bad” kids because you didn’t allow them free expression (or free expulsion). ---
**Author:** ![Ranger\_Jeff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranger_jeff/32/2065_2.png) [@Ranger\_Jeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranger_Jeff)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2016, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426/36 "2016-03-30T21:21:02Z")
I blame the barking spiders. Once I was waiting in the line for the cashier when a little girl, maybe just 3, was waiting in line with her mommy in the next aisle. She farted and looked embarrassed about it, so I just gave her a smile and told her “That was a good one.” ---
**Author:** ![TBG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c89c15/32.png) [@TBG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TBG)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2016, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426/37 "2016-04-15T21:54:12Z")
Good night, sweet prince ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2016, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426/38 "2016-04-16T00:06:52Z")
_Lights A Match Now That He’s Gone_ ---
**Author:** ![Enuma\_Elish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5e9695/32.png) [@Enuma\_Elish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enuma_Elish)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2016, 11:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426/39 "2016-04-16T11:24:35Z")
When I was in 7th grade, I tried to sneak out a fart. It came out as a big long squeak/whistle. I turned to the boy sitting next to me and said, “Way to go, Mike!” Everyone thought it was him, no matter how much he denied it. I’m sure if I saw him today, he’d still be irked. ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2016, 11:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426/40 "2016-04-16T11:50:28Z")
> [@Enuma\_Elish](#): > > When I was in 7th grade, I tried to sneak out a fart. It came out as a big long squeak/whistle. > I turned to the boy sitting next to me and said, “Way to go, Mike!” Everyone thought it was him, no matter how much he denied it. I’m sure if I saw him today, he’d still be irked. I knew Mike! He denied being the culprit for many troubled years. The accusation devestated him and he eventually committed suicide (in a terribly painful manner) as a result. …or, maybe that was a different Mike… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parents-how-do-you-deal-with-the-issue-of-farting-with-your-children/750426.md?page=3)