# Paris Hilton changes her ways **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 25, 2004, 3:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999 "2004-09-25T03:42:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Charlie\_Tan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/charlie_tan/32/12582_2.png) [@Charlie\_Tan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Charlie_Tan)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2004, 10:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999/41 "2004-09-26T10:34:50Z")
Bombo? _Bombo?_ **Bombo!** šŸ˜ƒ ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2004, 10:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999/42 "2004-09-26T10:38:27Z")
**SHAKES:** _Thats a red herring bub. Why donā€™t you try to answering my questions first?_ No, itā€™s not at all a red herring. Your questions were directly based on your implication that criticism of Hilton is analogous to criticism of gays. I think thatā€™s a lousy analogy. _Also might like to add that Paris HAS done her share of charity work._ Good for her, but that doesnā€™t mean itā€™s unfair to criticize her for other things. Plenty of people manage to do charity work without becoming shallow, conceited media whores in other aspects of their life. (To be candid, I donā€™t care a flip about Hiltonā€™s lifestyle and have no interest in whom she sleeps with. Iā€™m just rather appalled by the suggestion that in general, we ought to cut people some slack because of their wealthy and privileged upbringing. I thought that wealth and privilege were advantages that required their possessors to be held to a **higher** standard than averageā€”ā€œnoblesse obligeā€ and all that.) ---
**Author:** ![Cerri](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3bc359/32.png) [@Cerri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cerri)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2004, 10:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999/43 "2004-09-26T10:49:14Z")
Ok, now, keep in mind I cancelled my cable 11 months ago, havenā€™t watched TV since, and I donā€™t read pop culture magazines (i.e. Cosmo, People, etc). I am honestly trying to think of what sheā€™s supposed to be famous for, and the only 3 things Iā€™ve ever heard about her are A) Sheā€™s a Hilton i.e. filthy rich B) She apparently likes to drink. Alot. and C) She likes to have sex. Also, alot. Possibly on film. Now, while Iā€™d love to be A), Iā€™m not, but I admit to having engaged in B) and C) quite often, so Iā€™m not condemning her. (Though Iā€™d like to think with my ā€œevil liberal hippie waysā€, Iā€™d have used that money to some benefit, but _shrug_ who knows?) But honestly. Those are the only three things I know of her. If sheā€™s such an amazing humanitarian, **SHAKES** , what is she famous for that Iā€™ve missed? ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2004, 10:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999/44 "2004-09-26T10:55:26Z")
> [@Cerri](#): > > But honestly. Those are the only three things I know of her. If sheā€™s such an amazing humanitarian, **SHAKES** , what is she famous for that Iā€™ve missed? While Iā€™m not SHAKES(thank the Gods), I can answer your question. Paris Hilton gives the most technically incompetent head ever captured on film. ---
**Author:** ![Kayeby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9de0a6/32.png) [@Kayeby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kayeby)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2004, 11:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999/45 "2004-09-26T11:00:46Z")
I remember reading the news about Paris Hilton in my local newspaper and thinking ā€œ_this_ is what passes as news?ā€ But otherwise I would have thought that critics would see her change of heart as a step in the right direction. A lot of people never get past wanting to date a pretty face - and if youā€™re an attractive heiress with a reputation for being slutty and shallow, there canā€™t be any shortage of equally attractive, slutty and shallow guys. So maybe she woke up one day and decided she wanted a guy who wasnā€™t necessarily hot stuff or a movie star, but had a great heart and would treat her well. And maybe itā€™s a step towards becoming a more mature and responsible person. Iā€™m not saying she should get an award, or even be applauded for this revelation, but I donā€™t see how itā€™s Pitworthy. Iā€™m not a fan of Paris Hilton, but I donā€™t dislike her - count me in as someone who has never understood why she is so utterly despised. I think that she deliberately plays up to the bimbo party girl image. It was what originally propelled her into the limelight, and letā€™s face it - many people watch her show and drink in the media coverage partially _because_ sheā€™s so clueless and superficial. We can say to ourselves ā€œWell I donā€™t have a gazillion dollars, but at least Iā€™m not an idiot like Paris Hilton!ā€ I think sheā€™d be fascinating to analyse from a cultural studies perspective - **Too Rich and Too Thin: Paris Hilton as Modern Allegory** ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2004, 11:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999/46 "2004-09-26T11:07:52Z")
> [@The Gaspode](#): > > Well, yes, sheā€™s a stupid, slutty bombo. So what? Who does she hurt? I donā€™t think anyone in this thread is forced to watch the show, download the porn or buy mags where she is featured, let alone hang with her. > Why are yā€™all getting your panties in a bunch? I donā€™t wear panties, you undergarment oppressor. ---
**Author:** ![Kayeby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9de0a6/32.png) [@Kayeby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kayeby)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2004, 11:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999/47 "2004-09-26T11:10:47Z")
> [@Mockingbird](#): > > Paris Hilton gives the most technically incompetent head ever captured on film. Oooh details! I havenā€™t seen the video in question, but Iā€™m always looking for tips on giving better head. šŸ˜‰ ---
**Author:** ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2004, 11:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999/48 "2004-09-26T11:16:01Z")
> [@The Gaspode](#): > > Well, yes, sheā€™s a stupid, slutty bombo. So what? Who does she hurt? I donā€™t think anyone in this thread is forced to watch the show, download the porn or buy mags where she is featured, let alone hang with her. > Why are yā€™all getting your panties in a bunch? I donā€™t have any real problem with Paris Hilton ā€“ sheā€™s never done anything to me, and since I live in Japan itā€™s pretty easy for me to avoid most news of her. What ā€œgets my panties in a bunchā€ is **SHAKES** ā€™s suggestion that she is a typical young woman of her age (which happens to be _my_ age). ---
**Author:** ![Cerri](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3bc359/32.png) [@Cerri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cerri)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2004, 11:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999/49 "2004-09-26T11:50:49Z")
> [@Kayeby](#): > > I remember reading the news about Paris Hilton in my local newspaper and thinking ā€œ_this_ is what passes as news?ā€ But otherwise I would have thought that critics would see her change of heart as a step in the right direction. A lot of people never get past wanting to date a pretty face - and if youā€™re an attractive heiress with a reputation for being slutty and shallow, there canā€™t be any shortage of equally attractive, slutty and shallow guys. So maybe she woke up one day and decided she wanted a guy who wasnā€™t necessarily hot stuff or a movie star, but had a great heart and would treat her well. And maybe itā€™s a step towards becoming a more mature and responsible person. Iā€™m not saying she should get an award, or even be applauded for this revelation, but I donā€™t see how itā€™s Pitworthy. > \*\* I think the reasoning is that, though many of us were shallow and superficial when young, and did in fact, base dating decisions on such shallow and superficial things; when we did finally mature and base our dating choices on more ā€œmatureā€ criteria, we all didnā€™t feel so self-important for being rich and famous for being rich and famous (and apparently, givng bad head on film too, Iā€™ll have to take **Mockingbirdā€™s** word for it _chuckle_) that we needed to hold a press conference to share our growth with our adoring fans. šŸ˜‰ ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2004, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999/50 "2004-09-26T19:28:17Z")
> [@Mockingbird](#): > > I suggest she start with Woody Allen, Bud Selig, and Marv Albert. > > Then we can up the pain until she goes back to her regularly scheduled shallowness already in progress. Up the pain? _UP_ the pain? From _Bud Selig_? I refuse to believe that is possible and you are a bad man for implying it! ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2004, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999/51 "2004-09-26T19:45:31Z")
> [@Mockingbird](#): > > Paris Hilton gives the most technically incompetent head ever captured on film. Maybe she never rented a porn movie. Itā€™s not like you can tune in to _This Old Penis_ and get expert tips from Bob Vila. ---
**Author:** ![Charlie\_Tan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/charlie_tan/32/12582_2.png) [@Charlie\_Tan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Charlie_Tan)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2004, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999/52 "2004-09-26T19:52:10Z")
> [@Lamia](#): > > I donā€™t have any real problem with Paris Hilton ā€“ sheā€™s never done anything to me, and since I live in Japan itā€™s pretty easy for me to avoid most news of her. What ā€œgets my panties in a bunchā€ is **SHAKES** ā€™s suggestion that she is a typical young woman of her age (which happens to be _my_ age). Well, no, sheā€™s not. Even without the money, she wouldnā€™t be typical. Still, I canā€™t help but wondering if some of the bile directed towards her (not just on this board), is because she engaging in typical male behaviour: Sheā€™s a drunk, a sexual predator, and in many ways shameless. Iā€™d say that in many ways she behaves like a fratboy about her age. And thatā€™s _morally WRONG_, coming from a girl. ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2004, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999/53 "2004-09-26T20:29:57Z")
> [@danceswithcats](#): > > Maybe she never rented a porn movie. Itā€™s not like you can tune in to _This Old Penis_ and get expert tips from Bob Vila. Nope, but you can read books like The Joy of Sex and similar works and get ideas which improve and augment technique. Seeā€¦ some who can do _can_ also teach. šŸ˜ƒ ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2004, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999/54 "2004-09-26T20:36:28Z")
> [@jsgoddess](#): > > Up the pain? _UP_ the pain? From _Bud Selig_? > > I refuse to believe that is possible and you are a bad man for implying it! Iā€™m a bad man, but this has nothing to do with it. There is worse and scarier than Bud Seligā€¦ Tommy Thompson, R. Kelly, David Duke, Jimmy Swaggart, Jim Bakker, and a host of other men are much worse. I think weā€™d really have to engineer a standard of the lowest tier for the XY chromosome pair. I think it would take the body of Larry ā€˜Budā€™ Melman with the charisma of Dick Cheney, the mind of Marge Schott, the warmth and compassion of Fred Phelps, and the rampant sexual allure of Pat Buchanan. Or we could just use Phelps as the prototype. ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2004, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999/55 "2004-09-26T20:49:08Z")
> [@Kayeby](#): > > Oooh details! I havenā€™t seen the video in question, but Iā€™m always looking for tips on giving better head. šŸ˜‰ Sheā€™s all slobber, slobber, slobber with poor hand work at best. It looks as if there is _no_ actual suction going on, and from her very limited amount of movement, I really doubt her tongue is active in the process. Good fellatio is an art and a skill. It requires: [ul] [li]Lips active in the process exerting force to massage as well as maintaining a seal for suction.[/li][li]The brains to know how to not nick their dick with your teeth.[/li][li]A tongue that is an active participant which is moving around the shaft and glans as the mouth provides suction and the lips massage.[/li][li]Hands that caress the thighs, reach up to caress the chest, play with the nipples, fondle the testicles, and for some men itā€™s essential to use the hands to finish the job.[/li][li]Plenty of saliva.[/li][li]A well trained gag reflex. It can take awhile to get it trained, but it is worth it.[/li][li]The understanding that the head does **not** have to remain stationary during the process. Your neck can turn and twist with a great variety of motion. _ **Use it** _.[/li][li]Ohā€¦ and itā€™s only _called_ a blow job. Suction is required, otherwise youā€™re just providing a recepticle.[/li][/ul] Now, I think that my **Introduction to Fellatio** is now complete. My next seminar will be on **The Prostate and You**. For select class attendees there will be private tutoring available with visual aids. ---
**Author:** ![Charlie\_Tan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/charlie_tan/32/12582_2.png) [@Charlie\_Tan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Charlie_Tan)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2004, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999/56 "2004-09-26T23:04:35Z")
> [@Mockingbird](#): > > The brains to know how to not nick their dick with your teeth. A little gentle scratching with the front teethā€¦ Wroaar. šŸ˜› ---
**Author:** ![Amazon\_Floozy\_Goddess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/779978/32.png) [@Amazon\_Floozy\_Goddess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amazon_Floozy_Goddess)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2004, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999/57 "2004-09-27T02:40:39Z")
Yā€™know, as much wealth, popularity and looks she has, I bet underneath it all she feels pretty inadequate. People who have a lot in money and power but not much in the way of personality and self-worth always surround themselves with material things to try to make up for what they lack as a person. Letā€™s not forget thereā€™s been a fair number of very wealthy people who committed suicide. I bet if you stripped her of all her finery, sheā€™d be an absolute nobody. No friends, no identity, no personality - I canā€™t imagine being as void of spirit as she is. ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2004, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999/58 "2004-09-27T04:12:03Z")
> [@MsRobyn](#): > > How can you be so mean to the coolest Muppet ever?! C is for cheap skank, thatā€™s good enough for me! ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2004, 4:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999/59 "2004-09-27T04:18:24Z")
> [@](#): > > I bet if you stripped her of all her finery, sheā€™d be an absolute nobody. No friends, no identity, no personality - I canā€™t imagine being as void of spirit as she is. This is another thing that kills me. People acting as if they knew Paris personaly. I just donā€™t get how otherwise intelligent people act like such muppets when it comes to the media. Keep in mind folks; If Paris helps a lilttle old lady across the street; itā€™s not gonna even come close to making the news. BOTOH, if Paris sticks her foot up little old ladyā€™s ass; then it will be on the front page of every tabloid around the globe. The media only allows us to see one side of herā€¦ ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2004, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999/60 "2004-09-27T04:36:11Z")
Yeah, the [one](http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&ie=UTF-8&q=paris+hilton+upskirt&btnG=Google+Search) [she](http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&lr=&ie=UTF-8&safe=off&q=paris+hilton+sex+tape&btnG=Search)[shows](http://images.google.com/images?hl=en&ie=UTF-8&safe=off&q=paris+hilton+fhm&spell=1)[us](http://images.google.com/images?hl=en&lr=&ie=UTF-8&safe=off&q=paris+hilton+maxim&btnG=Search). (Click on images in the first two.) I donā€™t care that sheā€™s promiscuous (since itā€™s likely I would be too if I were more extroverted) but to try to say the media is responsible for her whoring, both figurative and literal, is laughable. Sheā€™s an attention starved socialite that constantly keeps herself in the spotlight with her immature behaviour. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paris-hilton-changes-her-ways/265999.md?page=4)