# Parking fines for whale rescuers

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [January 23, 2006, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242 "2006-01-23T13:44:10Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2006, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242/21 "2006-01-23T20:32:52Z")

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> [@flight](#):
>
> While the level of importance to the community is different, there is a common reason they should both be exempt: They are responding to a public emergency situation that does not afford them the luxury of time to find longer term parking.

That largely being my point. I’ll admit to not knowing much about whale rescue, but I’m going on the assumption time is of the essence, and rescuers don’t have the luxury of circling the lot looking for a legal space.

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**Author:** ![Greathouse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/greathouse/32/2992_2.png) [@Greathouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greathouse)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2006, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242/22 "2006-01-23T20:49:06Z")

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Is there some reason that they couldn’t just park leagally and then shoot or somehow kill the whale, if it wasn’t dead already? Then they could carve it up and dispose of it or feed some people.  
It is _just_ a whale, afterall.

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**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2006, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242/23 "2006-01-23T20:54:24Z")

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> [@zelie zelerton](#):
>
> Really? why not? Shouldn’t we have a dedicated charity? After all we have the Norwich and Norfolk Mountain Rescue 😉

In case a mountain decides to strand itself on the shore of East Anglia? Useful in case of “Yes” reunion concerts! 😉

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**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2006, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242/24 "2006-01-23T21:15:19Z")

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> [@Greathouse](#):
>
> Is there some reason that they couldn’t just park leagally and then shoot or somehow kill the whale, if it wasn’t dead already? Then they could carve it up and dispose of it or feed some people.

_Save The Whales_… in Ziploc sandwich baggies.

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**Author:** ![Bytegeist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/9dc877/32.png) [@Bytegeist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bytegeist)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2006, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242/25 "2006-01-23T21:52:37Z")

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> [@tdn](#):
>
> If not, though, in the above quote replace “whale-rescuers” with “fire-fighters” and see how ridiculous that sounds.

> [@Smeghead](#):
>
> I agree, that does sound quite ridiculous. Since the two are completely different, attempting to draw a comparison between them is ludicrous.

For maximum _ludicrosity_ though, I say you can’t top “whale-fighters” and “fire-rescuers”.

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**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2006, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242/26 "2006-01-23T21:54:54Z")

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Whale…the other, other white meat.

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**Author:** ![Greathouse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/greathouse/32/2992_2.png) [@Greathouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greathouse)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2006, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242/27 "2006-01-23T22:33:03Z")

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> [@silenus](#):
>
> Whale…the other, other white meat.

Exactly!

I mean why waste all of the time and effort and money to save a freakin whale? It doesn’t make sense to me. Just blow it up, clean up the big bits and call it a day.

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**Author:** ![GorillaMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/50afbb/32.png) [@GorillaMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GorillaMan)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2006, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242/28 "2006-01-23T22:36:11Z")

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> [@tdn](#):
>
> That largely being my point. I’ll admit to not knowing much about whale rescue, but I’m going on the assumption time is of the essence, and rescuers don’t have the luxury of circling the lot looking for a legal space.

Exactly. Some of the reports I heard were that the vehicles belonged to people who’d been helping load the whale onto the barge, then jumped onto the barge before it departed…running back to feed the meter wasn’t a priority.

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**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2006, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242/29 "2006-01-23T22:36:34Z")

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> [@Greathouse](#):
>
> I mean why waste all of the time and effort and money to save a freakin whale? It doesn’t make sense to me. Just blow it up, clean up the big bits and call it a day.

[It’s been tried.](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Exploding_whale) You can’t blow up a whale without danger to lives and property nearby, especially in a densely populated area like Central London.

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**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2006, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242/30 "2006-01-23T22:39:05Z")

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You have to understand…it wasn’t so much the “saving the whale.” It was the “feeling real good about yourself after doing something for the planet” that was the motivator.

If it was dying, put it out of its misery. If it was that lost, kill it before it breeds more stupid whales. Think of it as evolution in action.

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**Author:** ![Greathouse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/greathouse/32/2992_2.png) [@Greathouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greathouse)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2006, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242/31 "2006-01-23T22:43:52Z")

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> [@Anne Neville](#):
>
> [It’s been tried.](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Exploding_whale) You can’t blow up a whale without danger to lives and property nearby, especially in a densely populated area like Central London.

Ok, then how about taking some chain saws and chopping it up nicely so it can be bagged and removed? Turn it into cat food or something. Those hairy fuckers will eat anything.

I was unaware of the whale blasting problems in the past. I’ll take that one back. Thanks for the link.

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**Author:** ![GorillaMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/50afbb/32.png) [@GorillaMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GorillaMan)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2006, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242/32 "2006-01-23T22:52:32Z")

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> [@silenus](#):
>
> You have to understand…it wasn’t so much the “saving the whale.” It was the “feeling real good about yourself after doing something for the planet” that was the motivator.
> 
> If it was dying, put it out of its misery. If it was that lost, kill it before it breeds more stupid whales. Think of it as evolution in action.

Nobody knew it was ill or dying. In fact, nobody knows this for certain until a post mortem is carried out. Given the global population of this species is about ten thousand, attempting to save one adolescent female seems like a sensible course of action.

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**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2006, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242/33 "2006-01-23T22:56:49Z")

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> [@Greathouse](#):
>
> I was unaware of the whale blasting problems in the past. I’ll take that one back. Thanks for the link.

I think standard dead-whale-disposal procedure these days is to tow it out to sea in one piece, which isn’t that different from what they were trying to do. There might be odor issues with chopping up a whale in Central London- there’s a reason why they tend to do those sorts of things in unpopulated areas.

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**Author:** ![Greathouse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/greathouse/32/2992_2.png) [@Greathouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greathouse)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2006, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242/34 "2006-01-23T23:00:24Z")

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> [@Anne Neville](#):
>
> There might be odor issues with chopping up a whale in Central London

I doubt it. I’ve been to London.

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**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2006, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242/35 "2006-01-23T23:04:33Z")

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> [@Anne Neville](#):
>
> I think standard dead-whale-disposal procedure these days is to tow it out to sea in one piece, which isn’t that different from what they were trying to do. There might be odor issues with chopping up a whale in Central London- there’s a reason why they tend to do those sorts of things in unpopulated areas.

Do you mean to tell me that in all of the greater London metropolitan area, there isn’t even one house with a “dead whale storage” sign out in front?

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**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2006, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242/36 "2006-01-23T23:06:33Z")

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> [@Scumpup](#):
>
> Do you mean to tell me that in all of the greater London metropolitan area, there isn’t even one house with a “dead whale storage” sign out in front?

Storing dead whales ain’t my fuckin’ business.

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**Author:** ![wevets](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e9a140/32.png) [@wevets](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wevets)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2006, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242/37 "2006-01-23T23:38:29Z")

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> [@Anne Neville](#):
>
> I think standard dead-whale-disposal procedure these days is to tow it out to sea in one piece, which isn’t that different from what they were trying to do.

If possible. There are many strandings where this is not possible due to the size of the whale or the sea state, or local shore conditions. Second best is often to bury it - there’s at least three buried whales within seven miles of where I’m sitting. However, in central London this might not be an option, as I’d imagine there’s not much beach or open areas people are willing to see dug up.

BTW, re: whoever mentioned killing the whale: a dead whale is **more** of a navigational hazard to boats than a living one. You _want_ it to swim away. Would that guy in _The Godfather_ have been happier with a live or a dead horse in his bed? 😉

> [@](#):
>
> There might be odor issues with chopping up a whale in Central London- there’s a reason why they tend to do those sorts of things in unpopulated areas.

The smell is really bad. You thought live whales smelled bad? Whale feces? No, dead whale leaves them all standing wondering “did Carl Lewis leave the iron on?” I have to admit that of all the urban smells, even the smell of urine on the street isn’t as bad as dead whale. Where’s a vomiting smiley when you need one?

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**Author:** ![Scissorjack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)\
**Post date:** [January 23, 2006, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242/38 "2006-01-23T23:57:36Z")

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> [@Greathouse](#):
>
> Is there some reason that they couldn’t just park leagally and then shoot or somehow kill the whale, if it wasn’t dead already? Then they could carve it up and dispose of it or feed some people.

Not so fast, buddy! A beached whale is a [Royal Fish](http://www.americanliterature.com/MD/MD90.HTML), and as such belongs by ancient custom to the Queen. You better think twice about disposing of Liz’s deceased cetaceans in such a cavalier manner if you don’t want to end up in the Tower. You’d be better off dumping it on her lawn, ringing the bell, and then running away.

Heh. I _knew_ reading _Moby Dick_ would come in handy some day.

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**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\
**Post date:** [January 24, 2006, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242/39 "2006-01-24T00:02:43Z")

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> [@Case Sensitive](#):
>
> Not so fast, buddy! A beached whale is a [Royal Fish](http://www.americanliterature.com/MD/MD90.HTML), and as such belongs by ancient custom to the Queen.

They should therefore have deposited the corpse in front of Buckingham Palace. 😃

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**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\
**Post date:** [January 24, 2006, 12:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parking-fines-for-whale-rescuers/341242/40 "2006-01-24T00:27:00Z")

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> [@wevets](#):
>
> If possible. There are many strandings where this is not possible due to the size of the whale or the sea state, or local shore conditions. Second best is often to bury it - there’s at least three buried whales within seven miles of where I’m sitting. However, in central London this might not be an option, as I’d imagine there’s not much beach or open areas people are willing to see dug up.

My point was, the recommended whale-disposal method, even if one does not care about the welfare of the whale, does not include blowing up or chopping up the whale.

> [@](#):
>
> The smell is really bad. You thought live whales smelled bad? Whale feces? No, dead whale leaves them all standing wondering “did Carl Lewis leave the iron on?” I have to admit that of all the urban smells, even the smell of urine on the street isn’t as bad as dead whale. Where’s a vomiting smiley when you need one?

So _that’s_ what was in that awful cheap canned cat food my mom used to feed her cat! P.U! 😛 I can still remember that smell twelve years after moving out of the house. It kept me from feeding the Neville kitties canned food for a long time, until I got some better-quality canned food and realized that not all canned cat food stunk that badly.

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