# Parkway/Driveway type questions **URL:** \ **Category:** Cecil's Columns/Staff Reports\ **Created:** [August 30, 2006, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parkway-driveway-type-questions/370880 "2006-08-30T23:33:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![cissa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7cd45c/32.png) [@cissa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cissa)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2006, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parkway-driveway-type-questions/370880/1 "2006-08-30T23:33:16Z")
I was trying to create a new thread for a new topic but I couldn’t find the place to do it!! Hopefully this can get moved from here. I am looking for the name of these types of questions/thoughts… Examples: - Why do you drive on a parkway and park on a driveway? - Why is it that kidnapping is a federal offense, while catnapping is merely an enjoyable pastime? Surely there must be a name for these? Like oxymorons, chiastisms etc. Thanks! Cissa ---
**Author:** ![Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e36b37/32.png) [@Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Airman_Doors_USAF)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2006, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parkway-driveway-type-questions/370880/2 "2006-08-31T00:50:18Z")
[QUOTE=cissa] Surely there must be a name for these? Like oxymorons, chiastisms etc. [/QUOTE] Yes, there is a name for these. They are called stupid questions. ---
**Author:** ![bibliophage](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bibliophage/32/7615_2.png) [@bibliophage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bibliophage)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2006, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parkway-driveway-type-questions/370880/3 "2006-08-31T04:46:32Z")
I’ve split these two posts off the other thread and moved them to a new one. You can start new threads by clicking on the “new thread” button on the [forum page](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/forumdisplay.php?f=1) Also, a link to the column you’re commenting on is appeciated. The one in question is [http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a2\_080.html](http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a2_080.html) To answer your query, such questions are called [Questions Cecil Refuses to Answer](http://www.straightdope.com/faq/lamequestions.html), “crackbrain questions,” or judging from the URL, “lame questions.” ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2006, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parkway-driveway-type-questions/370880/4 "2006-08-31T19:10:09Z")
[QUOTE=bibliophage] I’ve split these two posts off the other thread and moved them to a new one. You can start new threads by clicking on the “new thread” button on the [forum page](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/forumdisplay.php?f=1) Also, a link to the column you’re commenting on is appeciated. The one in question is [http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a2\_080.html](http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a2_080.html) To answer your query, such questions are called [Questions Cecil Refuses to Answer](http://www.straightdope.com/faq/lamequestions.html), “crackbrain questions,” or judging from the URL, “lame questions.” [/QUOTE] I suppose you could add to the list of _Questions Cecil Refuses to Answer_, “Why won’t Cecil answer these questions?” 😉 ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2006, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parkway-driveway-type-questions/370880/5 "2006-09-02T04:05:08Z")
What’s that white stuff in bird poop? What’s big and blue, and eats rocks? What’s long and brown and sticky? What’s this long, brown, sticky thing on my Driveway? The spillway is over there, by the peterfor. Why did you spill on the the henway? ---
**Author:** ![Peter\_Morris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peter_morris/32/359_2.png) [@Peter\_Morris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peter_Morris)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2006, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parkway-driveway-type-questions/370880/6 "2006-09-04T04:17:40Z")
Goods sent by road are called a ship-ment. Goods sent by water are called a car-go. Noses run and feet smell. ---
**Author:** ![Roog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/a87d85/32.png) [@Roog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roog)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2006, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parkway-driveway-type-questions/370880/7 "2006-09-07T19:13:33Z")
When I see these questions, I think of George Carlin. They have always been parts of his comedy routines and his books. But I never thought of them as serious questions at all. They are just a way to point out the inconsistencies of the English language. ---
**Author:** ![Nature\_s\_Call](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nature_s_call/32/19006_2.png) [@Nature\_s\_Call](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nature_s_Call)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2006, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parkway-driveway-type-questions/370880/8 "2006-09-08T13:09:51Z")
Why are they called apartments when they’re all stuck together? Why are they called buildings when they should be called builts? If vegetarians eat vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? (one could, of course, go on) ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2006, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parkway-driveway-type-questions/370880/9 "2006-09-08T13:24:17Z")
Why do they serve French bread in Italian restaurants? ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2006, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/parkway-driveway-type-questions/370880/10 "2006-09-08T14:06:52Z")
If people who speak the language of the Angles are called Anglophones, what does that make people who speak the language of the Saxons?