# party for dead person--weird? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 5, 2002, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/party-for-dead-person-weird/117516 "2002-07-05T18:12:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![booklover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/85f322/32.png) [@booklover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/booklover)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2002, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/party-for-dead-person-weird/117516/1 "2002-07-05T18:12:11Z")
Next Thursday, if my grandfather were still alive, he’d turn 100. My uncle and cousin have taken the initiative and decided that we are going to go out to dinner to celebrate this birthday (don’t know if we’re visiting the cemetery afterwards, but that’s a possibility). So do other folks think this is weird? One of my coworkers did when I told her about it. My family doesn’t come from any kind of religious/ethnic background where honoring the dead is a big deal. Just wondering what the Dopers think. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2002, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/party-for-dead-person-weird/117516/2 "2002-07-05T18:44:26Z")
We celebrate George Washington’s birthday, and Abraham Lincoln’s too. Also Martin Luther King. All of them are dead, yet we celebrate their birthdays. ---
**Author:** ![de\_trop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b5ac83/32.png) [@de\_trop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/de_trop)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2002, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/party-for-dead-person-weird/117516/3 "2002-07-05T18:49:57Z")
I think it’s grand. I hope it’s an occassion for family pride and togetherness, and that the inevitable nostalgia for the man doesn’t make anybody cry too much. I certainly hope my kin remember me sometimes after I’m dead. And so why not the centennial? We do that for Columbus and Jefferson, etc. It’s a perfect time. ---
**Author:** ![auntie\_em](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5e9695/32.png) [@auntie\_em](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/auntie_em)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2002, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/party-for-dead-person-weird/117516/4 "2002-07-05T18:50:22Z")
My lovely dad died in 1996. I give my mom a present every year on his birthday (which, coincidentally, is the same day as Abe Lincoln’s). From the time I was about 7 years old until he died, I (and, subsequently, all of my friends) called him Bertram (although that was not his name… long story), so I write “Happy Bert-day” on her present. I can’t answer your question, though, **booklover** (as to whether or not it’s weird) because we’re all nutjobs in my family. 😛 Still, I agree with **Johnny L.A.** ; if we celebrate George Washington’s birthday, why not celebrate the birthday of a dead guy you actually _knew and (presumably) loved_? ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2002, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/party-for-dead-person-weird/117516/5 "2002-07-05T19:19:52Z")
I think it’s a wonderful way to help keep his memory alive, and if other people think it’s odd, well, they weren’t invited anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Scarlett67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scarlett67/32/7387_2.png) [@Scarlett67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarlett67)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2002, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/party-for-dead-person-weird/117516/6 "2002-07-05T20:11:46Z")
Heck, we make note of our dead DOG’s birthday. (It’s next Thursday, as a matter of fact. Hey, Miss Emily, we miss you and we still love you!) Have fun at your dinner, and be sure to raise a glass to Gramps. I’m sure he’ll be there. ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2002, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/party-for-dead-person-weird/117516/7 "2002-07-05T20:49:20Z")
UNH throws a birthday party for the school’s founder, Mr. Thompson, every year, despite the fact that the man has been dead for several decades… ---
**Author:** ![tetsusaru](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f14d63/32.png) [@tetsusaru](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tetsusaru)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2002, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/party-for-dead-person-weird/117516/8 "2002-07-06T14:26:48Z")
Hell, no. It`s for the living, not the dead. About ten years back, my best friend`s mother died of cancer - before her time, she was only in her 50`s. Jo was the noisiest, most sociable, gregarious lady you`d ever meet - any time you went round to the house, it was an occasion - a glass of wine was thrust into your hand, a cigarette would be lit.,and you`d be dragged into a heated argument with someone you`d never met. She had more life and energy than anyone I`ve ever met, and it was a privilege to know her. The wake after her funeral was a blast, and I use the word deliberately. Her house was filled with noisy, chainsmoking drunks, arguing at the tops of their voices - I kept half-expecting her to walk up the stairs and pitch in. As the evening wore on, everyone slipped quietly downstairs with a glass, to where she was laid out, and paid their respects. I know it`s a cliche, but it is what she would have wanted, and it was an honour to her memory. Celebrate away. ---
**Author:** ![Iguana\_Boy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/ed655f/32.png) [@Iguana\_Boy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iguana_Boy)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2002, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/party-for-dead-person-weird/117516/9 "2002-07-06T23:38:01Z")
I think it is an excellent idea, and a great way to remember/honour your grandfather. I don’t think you have to come from any religious or ethnic background to want to keep the memory of a dead relative alive, so just go and make sure you have a good time. I’m sure it’s what your grandfather would have wanted. I certainly would be very pleased at the idea of my relatives doing the same for me when I am gone. ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2002, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/party-for-dead-person-weird/117516/10 "2002-07-07T00:44:52Z")
**tetsusaru** , you may have been at _my_ late aunt’s wake. 🙂 Go for it, **bookloves**. It’s not weird at all. Here’s to grandpa, and here’s to 100 more.