# Passenger in a car/truck changing radio stations without asking **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 24, 2000, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passenger-in-a-car-truck-changing-radio-stations-without-asking/30641 "2000-08-24T21:22:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Anachronism](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e56c9b/32.png) [@Anachronism](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anachronism)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2000, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passenger-in-a-car-truck-changing-radio-stations-without-asking/30641/1 "2000-08-24T21:22:41Z")
If you were a passenger in a car/truck would you reach over and change the radio station? Or mess with the heat or A/C for that matter. I do drive a truck doing local deliveries with a helper along for the ride. I have noticed the younger guy’s (18-20) will reach out and change the station or mess with the heat without a second thought. I always considered the radio to be in control of the driver and if you wanted a different station you asked the driver to do it, or at least asked his permission first. Most people I know about my age (28) and older seem to feel they same way I do. Am I crazy or is this a generational thing. ---
**Author:** ![psycat90](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@psycat90](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psycat90)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2000, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passenger-in-a-car-truck-changing-radio-stations-without-asking/30641/2 "2000-08-24T21:30:32Z")
You’re not crazy, well, as far as I know. That’s just plain rude. ---
**Author:** ![Gazoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ce73a5/32.png) [@Gazoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gazoo)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2000, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passenger-in-a-car-truck-changing-radio-stations-without-asking/30641/3 "2000-08-24T21:34:11Z")
IMHO it depends on the relationship. I’d have no problem changing it as a passenger with family or good friends, but I certainly wouldn’t do it with just an acquaintance. I’m 32. ---
**Author:** ![Lucky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Lucky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucky)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2000, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passenger-in-a-car-truck-changing-radio-stations-without-asking/30641/4 "2000-08-24T21:50:32Z")
One day when my former boss’ car was in the shop, he asked me to drive him there to pick it up. While riding in my car, not only did he change the radio station without asking, he _adjusted the trebble, bass and balance to his own personal liking!_ Beat that. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2000, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passenger-in-a-car-truck-changing-radio-stations-without-asking/30641/5 "2000-08-24T21:59:37Z")
The Kunilou twins are almost 15, and like all teen-age boys, obsessively interested in learning how to drive, so I found myself dropping little bits of driver advice into the conversation. And I tell them, forcefully, that the first rule of cars is “THE RADIO BELONGS TO THE DRIVER!” ---
**Author:** ![sailor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@sailor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sailor)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2000, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passenger-in-a-car-truck-changing-radio-stations-without-asking/30641/6 "2000-08-24T22:03:06Z")
I would consider it rude to change anything without asking while I am in someone else’s car. OTOH, it is thr owner/driver’s responsibility to ask and make sure everyone is comfortable. Whn I am in someone else’s car I consider it quite rude to have the music on if we are trying to carry on a conversation. Generally I will just talk softly and ask him to repeat things and I’ll say “sorry, I can’t hear you well with the music on. Do you mind if I turn it off?” If you would rather listen to the music then I would rather not carry on a conversation. As for the temperature controls I would ask everybody if they are comfortable. ---
**Author:** ![Rodd\_Hill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/3ab097/32.png) [@Rodd\_Hill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rodd_Hill)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2000, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passenger-in-a-car-truck-changing-radio-stations-without-asking/30641/7 "2000-08-24T22:06:22Z")
I’ve always thought of the driver of the car like the captain of a ship, or the pilot of an aircraft: regardless of the rank of any passenger, the man (or woman) at the wheel is _in charge_ (…although this has led to several disagreements between myself and erstwhile navigators in the passenger seat). I don’t even change the heat/air settings when riding in someone else’s car (admittedly, a rare event) without asking if they mind first. On occasion, I have borrowed a parent’s car for the day while mine was in the shop, and while using it, changed a station or two **but always** changed them back before returning the car. **Lucky** said: > [@](#): > > …not only did he change the radio station without asking, he adjusted the trebble, bass and balance to his own personal liking! This is just short of spitting on the floormats, in my opinion. ---
**Author:** ![Athena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/35a633/32.png) [@Athena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Athena)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2000, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passenger-in-a-car-truck-changing-radio-stations-without-asking/30641/8 "2000-08-24T22:10:47Z")
I used to commute with a friend, in my car. She used to whine almost every morning about my choice of radio stations (NPR). She wanted to listen to music. I told her No. My ex and I used to have radio wars when we’d be driving long distances. We’d quite often drive from Colorado to Michigan, and sometimes take turns sleeping and drive overnight. He was of the opinion that the sleeper should get to turn the radio off so that it was easier to sleep. I was of the opinion that the driver needed whatever was necessary to stay awake while driving at 3am. We almost came to blows over this. ---
**Author:** ![Demo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/demo/32/8472_2.png) [@Demo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Demo)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2000, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passenger-in-a-car-truck-changing-radio-stations-without-asking/30641/9 "2000-08-24T22:36:38Z")
Athena: Totally! I was in the Army for seven years and made many 1000-2000 mile treks during that time. I’m the kind of person who wants to get there, not make a billion stops to rest or even to take a leak. I’d be half-asleep, eyes held open by toothpicks, crunching on ice and cornuts with the window open, sucking on a no-doze and listening to the radio, going 120 MPH with a full bladder. I mean, I’m trying to get us home to see our family, not wanting to waste any of the precious leave time on the trip and she’s there, bitching because she can’t sleep! Gaagghhhh!!! I had so many visions of just leaving her at one of those rest stops… ---
**Author:** ![stuyguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ec9cab/32.png) [@stuyguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stuyguy)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2000, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passenger-in-a-car-truck-changing-radio-stations-without-asking/30641/10 "2000-08-24T22:53:20Z")
During a three-week RV roadtrip across eastern Canada in 1989, my four friends and I created an iron-clad rule which remains in effect to this day: THE DRIVER IS THE GOD OF THE CAR. No questions asked and no appeals to the jury. (But, thanks to the reasonable people involved – no abuses, either.) ---
**Author:** ![SisterCoyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/958977/32.png) [@SisterCoyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SisterCoyote)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2000, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passenger-in-a-car-truck-changing-radio-stations-without-asking/30641/11 "2000-08-24T23:02:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by stuyguy \* > \*\*During a three-week RV roadtrip across eastern Canada in 1989, my four friends and I created an iron-clad rule which remains in effect to this day: > > THE DRIVER IS THE GOD OF THE CAR. > > No questions asked and no appeals to the jury. (But, thanks to the reasonable people involved – no abuses, either.) \*\* Or, as my friends and I say, The car is not a democracy. dog’s mom: “Where are we going?” dogsbody: “Well, the three of us are going wherever you’re going. It’s not like we have a choice, mom.” But yes, I think changing the radio station is rude - **unless** the driver has asked the passenger to do so. Or the CD (for example) needs to be changed. That sort of stuff the passenger **should** do (imnsho) - otherwise the driver becomes dangerous. I’m not bothered when my passengers choose to adjust the heater/ac, however. ---
**Author:** ![poohpah\_chalupa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/91b2a8/32.png) [@poohpah\_chalupa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/poohpah_chalupa)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2000, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passenger-in-a-car-truck-changing-radio-stations-without-asking/30641/12 "2000-08-24T23:19:34Z")
Usually, I’ll just mention to my “guest” that, if they would be so kind as to keep their fingers off the radio, I’ll keep my finger off the _passenger ejector seat button_… ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2000, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passenger-in-a-car-truck-changing-radio-stations-without-asking/30641/13 "2000-08-24T23:21:54Z")
I’m 18. I don’t mind when people I know do this. My parents do it on occasion, my sister on occasion. Parents are 44 and 42, sister 16. OTOH, I haven’t ever done this with friends b/c mostly my friends and I can tolerate the same sort of music. ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2000, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passenger-in-a-car-truck-changing-radio-stations-without-asking/30641/14 "2000-08-24T23:25:07Z")
Kids these days. (I’m 37.) It’s been my experience that kids in the same age range don’t know to let people off an elevator before they get on. They push the button to summon the elevator, then stand with their nose against the crack like an incontinent dog. They begin oozing in like a vaporized vampire as soon as the door starts to slide open, and if you’re inside and happen to be trying to get out, they look at you like _you’re_ in the way and push past you, leaving you to struggle around them to get out before the door closes. If I thoughtlessly stand right where the door’s going to open when my elevator arrives and I discover I’m blocking someone’s egress, I blush in shame and step back as if burned, offering my abject apology. It’s all related, in my book. I blame working mothers.\* \*I’m _kidding!_ Geez! ---
**Author:** ![ENugent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/4af34b/32.png) [@ENugent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ENugent)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2000, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passenger-in-a-car-truck-changing-radio-stations-without-asking/30641/15 "2000-08-24T23:32:53Z")
If you think it’s bad on the elevators, Lissener, you should try the subways around here! ---
**Author:** ![bafaa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e480ec/32.png) [@bafaa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bafaa)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2000, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passenger-in-a-car-truck-changing-radio-stations-without-asking/30641/16 "2000-08-25T02:59:56Z")
I dropped my car off to get repaired and the mechanic was going to drive me home. We get in his car but he forgot something and got out to go back to the office. So there I am…alone in his car…looking at the radio. It had some kind of weird cover on it…so I touched it and IT FELL OFF! OH NO!..SHIT! I frantically try to put it back but it won’t stay on! Now what do I do? So the mechanic gets back and I’m like “Heh, I uh, just touched it and it, umm, fell…uh, sorry.” He didn’t seem to care but I’ve never touched anyone’s radio again and hate when people mess with mine. ---
**Author:** ![Anti\_Pro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Anti\_Pro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anti_Pro)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2000, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passenger-in-a-car-truck-changing-radio-stations-without-asking/30641/17 "2000-08-25T03:15:59Z")
This is SO interesting, my oldest son is away at college and has just gotten his first car, and he was telling me how many times he’s given kids he barely even knows a ride and they’ll start messing with the radio buttons! I was amazed, and thought THEY were just freaks, but now I’ll have to tell him, it’s not true, or maybe freaks are just now starting to try to rule the world, one radio station at a time! 😉