# Passive spousalcide **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 6, 2012, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passive-spousalcide/633873 "2012-09-06T17:52:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![HoneyBadgerDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/honeybadgerdc/32/1033_2.png) [@HoneyBadgerDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HoneyBadgerDC)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2012, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passive-spousalcide/633873/1 "2012-09-06T17:52:35Z")
I have to wonder how many spouses try to kill their mates through passive methods of high risk eating and drinking. I could swear I see this from time to time. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2012, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passive-spousalcide/633873/2 "2012-09-06T18:02:26Z")
I’m sure it happens, but it’s not very reliable. The drinking part is likely to cause unexpected problems before death occurs. I’ve saved my wife the trouble though, I’m trying to commit suicide using that method. ---
**Author:** ![Moonlitherial](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4bbf92/32.png) [@Moonlitherial](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moonlitherial)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2012, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passive-spousalcide/633873/3 "2012-09-06T18:21:58Z")
That’s a huge long term plan. My husband claims I’m trying to kill him by dragging him on walks and cooking regular (healthy) meals so I guess it’s a perspective thing 😉 ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2012, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passive-spousalcide/633873/4 "2012-09-06T18:29:18Z")
I think juvenile patri/matricide through stress-induced hypertension and myocardial infarction are far more prevalent. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2012, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passive-spousalcide/633873/5 "2012-09-06T20:10:03Z")
I used to date/live with a girl who admitted that she was trying to fatten me up. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2012, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passive-spousalcide/633873/6 "2012-09-06T20:16:16Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > I used to date/live with a girl who admitted that she was trying to fatten me up. I hope you had a good reason for ending that. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2012, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passive-spousalcide/633873/7 "2012-09-06T20:19:08Z")
Several. ---
**Author:** ![Vita\_Beata](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a9a28c/32.png) [@Vita\_Beata](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vita_Beata)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2012, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passive-spousalcide/633873/8 "2012-09-06T21:15:55Z")
This might not be as passive, but: Mr. Beata parked the trailer under some huge leaning oaks. I questioned the chances of those trees falling upon our site. He said, “Don’t worry; we have insurance.” I asked, “On me?” He laughed! We both think each is trying to work the other to death out there in the woodlands. ---
**Author:** ![FloatyGimpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/floatygimpy/32/7750_2.png) [@FloatyGimpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FloatyGimpy)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2012, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passive-spousalcide/633873/9 "2012-09-06T21:17:15Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > I used to date/live with a girl who admitted that she was trying to fatten me up. My ex-husband told me the same thing. He said he was doing it so nobody else would want me. ---
**Author:** ![DrFidelius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drfidelius/32/3447_2.png) [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2012, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passive-spousalcide/633873/10 "2012-09-06T23:18:51Z")
I spent the last few years of my marriage building up an immunity to iocane powder. ---
**Author:** ![AaronX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/7bcc69/32.png) [@AaronX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AaronX)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2012, 8:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passive-spousalcide/633873/11 "2012-09-07T08:49:21Z")
How does eating/drinking kill your spouse? ---
**Author:** ![MandaJo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@MandaJo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MandaJo)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2012, 11:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passive-spousalcide/633873/12 "2012-09-07T11:04:01Z")
I think it’s more likely that a person would feel smug satisfaction at watching a someone they dislike do something self-destructive than that they would actually be thinking about killing them. Providing someone unhealthy foods so that you can feel self-righteous when they eat them isn’t logical, but it’s absolutely the type of thing people do. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2012, 11:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passive-spousalcide/633873/13 "2012-09-07T11:50:21Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > I used to date/live with a girl who admitted that she was trying to fatten me up. I’ve heard of that kink; “feeders”. They can end up creating the kind of person you end up seeing on the news having to be moved by a bunch of big guys or a small crane out of their bed. ---
**Author:** ![Vita\_Beata](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a9a28c/32.png) [@Vita\_Beata](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vita_Beata)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2012, 12:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passive-spousalcide/633873/14 "2012-09-07T12:33:59Z")
> [@Der\_Trihs](#): > > I’ve heard of that kink; “feeders”. They can end up creating the kind of person you end up seeing on the news having to be moved by a bunch of big guys or a small crane out of their bed. The “feeders” who have to call a crane in are the overachievers. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2012, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passive-spousalcide/633873/15 "2012-09-07T12:51:20Z")
> [@Der\_Trihs](#): > > I’ve heard of that kink; “feeders”. They can end up creating the kind of person you end up seeing on the news having to be moved by a bunch of big guys or a small crane out of their bed. I don’t think she wanted me to get **that** fat. But she did double the weight of her cat in those few years. ---
**Author:** ![a35362](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3da27b/32.png) [@a35362](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/a35362)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2012, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/passive-spousalcide/633873/16 "2012-09-07T17:12:59Z")
Are we talking about deliberately _trying to kill somebody_, or just the kind of spouse (presumably the wife) who uses something like the Betty Crocker cookbook with delicious comfort food recipes full of fat and salt? The food is nummy and he loves it, and maybe she pushes second helpings on him, and as the years go by he puts on the pounds and his arteries fill up and harden, and eventually he dies earlier than he might have. There was an episode of _The Big Bang Theory_ where Sheldon’s mother refers to the death of her husband – something about cream of mushroom soup used in a recipe every day means you won’t have to worry about him outliving you. Hinting that she was more or less deliberately trying to kill him in the guise of a loving wife who makes her husband all the foods he likes to eat, even though they’re bad for him.