# Paul Cellucci doesn't get it. How sad. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 24, 2005, 6:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656 "2005-02-24T06:15:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2005, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656/21 "2005-02-24T17:41:04Z")
> [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > \ We respect you - believe that. \ Actually, in light of the backlash from Canada’s sovereign decision to stay out of Iraq when the U.S. decided to have a military action there, I don’t really believe that the U.S. respects Canada. There seemed to be a whole lot of people that just expected Canada to fall in line with whatever the U.S. decided to do, because we _do_ have such a long history as trading partners, undefended border, etc., and acted hurt and surprised when Canada acted independently. On these very Boards, there have been any number of comments about how the U.S. doesn’t even notice Canada, much less care about what we think or how we do things. That doesn’t show a lot of respect. ---
**Author:** ![lno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@lno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lno)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2005, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656/22 "2005-02-24T17:44:25Z")
> [@manhattan](#): > > We’re cowboys, baby. With the top let back and the sunshine shinin’. You finance people are all the same. You’ve got your yachts with flags saying “Chilling The Most”, and you rock those bitches up and down the coast. > [@Gorsnak](#): > > Better hope we don’t hand you your asses in a sling like the last time you tried that stunt. The times, they are a changin’. ---
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2005, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656/23 "2005-02-24T17:47:43Z")
:snort: It’s cute. You sound so very American when you say things like that. ---
**Author:** ![Gorsnak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gorsnak/32/7587_2.png) [@Gorsnak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorsnak)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2005, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656/24 "2005-02-24T17:48:49Z")
What, you mean it wouldn’t be like Queenston Heights again? Nonsense! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2005, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656/25 "2005-02-24T17:49:00Z")
Sorry, that last was addressed to **Gorsnak** ’s “ass in a sling comment.” Preview is my friend. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2005, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656/26 "2005-02-24T18:19:31Z")
In Canada in February, that’s not a very wise thing to do. Q.E.D. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2005, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656/27 "2005-02-24T18:25:53Z")
(That was, of course, responding to Manhattan’s convertible quip… my fault for not refreshing.) Anyway… yeah. Someone said that Paul wasn’t acting like the U.S.'s ambassador, but like its proconsul. Very apt. ---
**Author:** ![Metacom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecae2f/32.png) [@Metacom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Metacom)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2005, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656/28 "2005-02-24T20:07:52Z")
> [@featherlou](#): > > On these very Boards, there have been any number of comments about how the U.S. doesn’t even notice Canada, much less care about what we think or how we do things. That doesn’t show a lot of respect. On behalf of the US, I humbly apologize for our lack of respect, and hope my gift of the states of Georgia, Alabama, Arkansas, and West Virginia will mend the rift between us. ---
**Author:** ![5que](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/5/3bc359/32.png) [@5que](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/5que)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2005, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656/29 "2005-02-24T20:41:59Z")
Man, don’t give them the _warm_ red states… ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2005, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656/30 "2005-02-24T20:47:55Z")
> [@Metacom](#): > > On behalf of the US, I humbly apologize for our lack of respect, and hope my gift of the states of Georgia, Alabama, Arkansas, and West Virginia will mend the rift between us. Hey! I don’t even know how to play hockey! Damn Texans. We shoulda given them back to Santa Anna. ---
**Author:** ![elfbabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b782af/32.png) [@elfbabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfbabe)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2005, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656/31 "2005-02-24T23:38:14Z")
> [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > That said, why do you care so much what Cellucci says, anyway? Our gifted diplomats go to places like China, Russia, or Syria. They have actual work to do there. This is the U.S. and Canada we’re talking about. We have the largest unguarded border _on the planet_. We’re allies. Fer Christ sakes man, we Americans don’t listen to what our “ambasador” says to Canada. He’s probably an old fraternity brother of dubya. He is low, and I mean low in the power structure. > > Anything important between our two nations doesn’t even cross his damn desk. Because you’re such close allies, it’s handled by the Cabinet. Celluci may be an idiot, I don’t know, but he has no power whatsoever. We respect you - believe that. If Celluci says something stupid, roll your eyes, shrug your shoulders, and move on. The power Celluci _does_ have seems to be the power to really piss ordinary Canadians off. When you need the cooperation of a democracy, making its citizens angry is really not the best way to go about getting it. Even if the actual negotiations are handled by more competent people, things still aren’t going to go anywhere near as smoothly if your official representative is bumbling around and making the voters disgruntled. ---
**Author:** ![manhattan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manhattan/32/7_2.png) [@manhattan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/manhattan)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2005, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656/32 "2005-02-24T23:48:26Z")
> [@matt\_mcl](#): > > In Canada in February, that’s not a very wise thing to do. Q.E.D. Well, OK, so we’re cowboys with pnenomia, baby. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2005, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656/33 "2005-02-25T00:08:59Z")
> [@Metacom](#): > > On behalf of the US, I humbly apologize for our lack of respect, and hope my gift of the states of Georgia, Alabama, Arkansas, and West Virginia will mend the rift between us. Well, thank you very - hey! Waitaminnit! (“pnenomia”? You’re not even trying anymore, are you?) ---
**Author:** ![Loopydude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e56c9b/32.png) [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2005, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656/34 "2005-02-25T00:19:07Z")
> [@ralph124c](#): > > Oh, and runnning up $400,000 in bills on his credit card. I think it was more like $700,000. The guy’s a cardinal dipshit. WTF is it about MA PubGubs, anyway? 1st it was Bill Weld, the Golfing Governer, who, if he didn’t get dinged for Ambassador to Mexico, might have actually accomplished something of note in his life (a scary thought, depending). Then Cellucci gets shuffled off to Canada, leaving us stranded with Jane fucking Swift, who was fond of choppering home to the Berkshires and letting her aids babysit her children. And now…_Mitt Romney_. We actually _elected_ that one. Maybe Bush can make him Ambassador to the Vatican. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2005, 5:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656/35 "2005-02-25T05:29:25Z")
> [@Loopydude](#): > > IAnd now…_Mitt Romney_. We actually _elected_ that one. Maybe Bush can make him Ambassador to the Vatican. Wait, it gets worse – Mitt’s positioning himself to run for President. :eek: Where’s that damned barf smilie when you need it? ---
**Author:** ![kingpengvin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9dc877/32.png) [@kingpengvin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kingpengvin)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2005, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656/36 "2005-02-25T13:45:20Z")
Well he has the diplomatic skills of a drunken elephant trying to use a toilet without busting it, but there is a point behind what he says. If, by some weird miracle, the US manages to get this anti missle system up and running we have ceded our soverignty of the skies above us… yet again. If they end up in a situation where they are blowing up enemy missles in the skies above us I’d like to think we’d have a say where it was safe and not safe to do so… you know like not above residential areas. The plan is for the system to blanket the continent. It affects us whether we want it or not. Why wouldn’t we want a say in how it is implemented. Oh well it doesn’t matter because whether the average Canadian is for or agin’ it we’re involved. The Liberal Party is playing politics again. They publically decry the system but behind the scenes visa vi NORAD they are working with the US on it. What annoys me more than a fucking shitty ambassador shooting his mouth off at us every few weeks is that we deserve it. For too long we have sat on our asses letting our Military fall to pieces because we have the worlds most powerful Military sitting South of us protecting us from our Enemies. We have no Soverignty… We have other nations laying claim to our arctic because we can not assert ourselves in any meaningful way. Bin Ladden did mention this country as a target… and if my memory serves correctly he has carried out every threat thus far. What do we have to protect ourselves. Hell, on 9/11 when a Korean airliner was Comining in over the NWT and not answering calls, what did our Country do to deal with this potential threat? Called in the US airforce!!! The US fucking airforce!!! We couldn’t even field two jet fighters !!! Face it, we are an American Protectoriate. We have just deluded ourselves into believeing we’re a Nation. PEOPLE OF CANADA WAKE THE FUCK UP!!! you may now continue your regularly scheduled US bashing… ---
**Author:** ![E-Sabbath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19adc/32.png) [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2005, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656/37 "2005-02-25T14:03:22Z")
That’s a good point. While I know Canadian Tankers are famous for their accuracy, I also seem to recall Canada’s navy is really in sad shape. Which surprises me, as Canada strikes me as a country that really needs a Coast Guard for Search and Rescue operations. Is yours civil? How do Canadians feel about, essentially, coasting on the US’s military for protection? (It’s an interesting counterpoint to the commonly raised point of how everyone pays for the cops and fire department, even if they don’t use them) Resentful? Superior? How bad are you guys off, anyhow? ---
**Author:** ![Fuji\_Kitakyusho](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f0a364/32.png) [@Fuji\_Kitakyusho](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fuji_Kitakyusho)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2005, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656/38 "2005-02-25T14:32:42Z")
> [@E-Sabbath](#): > > That’s a good point. While I know Canadian Tankers are famous for their accuracy, I also seem to recall Canada’s navy is really in sad shape. Which surprises me, as Canada strikes me as a country that really needs a Coast Guard for Search and Rescue operations. Is yours civil? How do Canadians feel about, essentially, coasting on the US’s military for protection? (It’s an interesting counterpoint to the commonly raised point of how everyone pays for the cops and fire department, even if they don’t use them) Resentful? Superior? How bad are you guys off, anyhow? The Canadian Coast Guard is not a military organization. In addition to fisheries and immigration enforcement activities, environmental protection, maintenance of aids to navigation and science support, the Canadian Coast Guard assumes a primary role as a coastal search and rescue provider. SAR is also provided by the Canadian Navy, Canadian Air Force, and vessels of opportunity as deemed necessary by the appropriate Rescue Coordination Center. Although our resources are certainly low in number, our technology is more advanced than is commonly perceived. Having the world’s longest coastline, to maintain the same level of coastal protection resources as the United States would be an insane expenditure per capita. [http://www.navy.forces.gc.ca/mspa\_fleet/fleet\_home\_e.asp](http://www.navy.forces.gc.ca/mspa_fleet/fleet_home_e.asp) [http://www.ccg-gcc.gc.ca/vessels-navires/main\_e.htm](http://www.ccg-gcc.gc.ca/vessels-navires/main_e.htm) [http://www.airforce.forces.gc.ca/equip/equip1\_e.asp](http://www.airforce.forces.gc.ca/equip/equip1_e.asp) ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2005, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656/39 "2005-02-25T15:33:54Z")
> [@Loopydude](#): > > I think it was more like $700,000. The guy’s a cardinal dipshit. The official rumor is that he spent too much time at the racetrack, and his friendly hometown banker has kept bailing him out. > [@](#): > > WTF is it about MA PubGubs, anyway? They get elected as outsiders who can clean up the mess in the legislature. Pretty soon they find that the real power is _in_ the Legislature, and they basically can’t do anything substantive. They get bored and want out. The national-level Pubs don’t want anything to do with (A) Mass. (never gonna get votes from there anyway), or (B) failures, so they either beg like Weld did or give it up. Meanwhile, the \*next \* Pub in line runs for governor as an outsider who can etc. Dunno 'bout you, but I always suspected Weld hit the bottle, too, just not to the point where he had to be outed like Ray Flynn. Speaking of whom … > [@](#): > > And now…_Mitt Romney_. We actually _elected_ that one. Maybe Bush can make him Ambassador to the Vatican. His equivocating on gay marriage will keep him from getting any traction in the South, and so will his really being a Mormon from Utah. How about the _LDS Church_ sends him on a \*mission \* to the Vatican instead? ---
**Author:** ![E-Sabbath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19adc/32.png) [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2005, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656/40 "2005-02-25T16:00:44Z")
I know your gear is good, when it’s new. That’s why I mentioned the tankers, they used to regularly outshoot the rest of the world. But wasn’t there a scandal about the navy, specifically, being outdated? Or was it food? It was about a year ago. Maybe it involved a submarine? That’s not a lot of tonnage, though, which is why I’m not surprised your coast guard is civil, as you stated. It’d pretty much _have_ to be, as it’s really important. Hm. [Further review](http://www.creativeresistance.ca/canada/2002-dec27-a-citizen's-review-of-canada's-military-spending-steven-staples-polaris-institute.htm) suggests your military spending is very high. Not something I expected, truthfully. Still, ours is much higher, so I’ve got to ask, does this ever press on people? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-cellucci-doesnt-get-it-how-sad/291656.md?page=3)