# Paul Ryan vs The Stench (Romney campaign melting down internally) \[satire warning\] **URL:** \ **Category:** Politics & Elections\ **Created:** [September 26, 2012, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842 "2012-09-26T01:21:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![GrandWino](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grandwino/32/67_2.png) [@GrandWino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrandWino)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842/1 "2012-09-26T01:21:09Z")
Pretty juicy [article by Roger Simon at Politico](http://www.politico.com/news/stories/0912/81618.html?hp=r7) today. If it wasn’t by such a respected journalist from such a respected news site, I’d assume it was parody. Taking it at face value, it appears there are some serious problems within the Romney campaign (not surprising given the state of the race). > [@](#): > > Though Ryan had already decided to distance himself from the floundering Romney campaign, he now feels totally uninhibited. Reportedly, he has been marching around his campaign bus, saying things like, “If Stench calls, take a message” and “Tell Stench I’m having finger sandwiches with Peggy Noonan and will text him later.” ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842/2 "2012-09-26T01:45:06Z")
My favorite paragraph: > [@](#): > > A word about PowerPoint. PowerPoint was released by Microsoft in 1990 as a way to euthanize cattle using a method less cruel than hitting them over the head with iron mallets. After PETA successfully argued in court that PowerPoint actually was more cruel than iron mallets, the program was adopted by corporations for slide show presentations. ---
**Author:** ![AnalogSignal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/analogsignal/32/1085_2.png) [@AnalogSignal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AnalogSignal)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842/3 "2012-09-26T02:10:26Z")
Hilarious and shocking that Ryan is saying this publicly. **Vote Stench / Ryan 2012!** ---
**Author:** ![Sudden\_Kestrel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecd19e/32.png) [@Sudden\_Kestrel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sudden_Kestrel)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842/4 "2012-09-26T02:12:10Z")
> [@AnalogSignal](#): > > Hilarious and shocking that Ryan is saying this publicly. > > **Vote Stench / Ryan 2012!** This explains the lack of Romney/Ryan campaign signs. They were waiting for the nickname to settle. ---
**Author:** ![Balance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ccd318/32.png) [@Balance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balance)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842/5 "2012-09-26T02:17:47Z")
> [@AnalogSignal](#): > > Hilarious and shocking that Ryan is saying this publicly. I’m reasonably sure that bit is poetic license. 😃 > [@Chefguy](#): > > My favorite paragraph: Indeed, the PowerPoint slams were worth the price of entry, politics aside. I have made note of the author’s name, so that I can attribute the quotes when I inevitably find occasion to use them. ---
**Author:** ![Simplicio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c37758/32.png) [@Simplicio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Simplicio)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842/6 "2012-09-26T02:23:10Z")
> [@AnalogSignal](#): > > Hilarious and shocking that Ryan is saying this publicly. Err, he isn’t, is he? There “are reports” (presumably dissatisfied staffers) that are saying he says it on the campaign bus. That’s not “public”. (I’m actually not sure if that bit isn’t supposed to be a joke. Its kind of hard to tell.) Might be true, but there isn’t really anyway to know. All it really says is that some people at the campaign are dissatisfied enough with Romney to be telling stories out of school. ---
**Author:** ![Gagundathar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a183cd/32.png) [@Gagundathar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gagundathar)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842/7 "2012-09-26T02:29:31Z")
Wow! That was quite unexpected. However they spin this, Mr. Romney’s ‘brain trust’ (aka Gilligan) is going to have to handle this swiftly. I wonder if they can. ---
**Author:** ![AnalogSignal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/analogsignal/32/1085_2.png) [@AnalogSignal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AnalogSignal)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842/8 "2012-09-26T02:30:20Z")
Yes, he isn’t saying this directly to reporters but he is marching around the campaign bus saying it. Then staffers are repeating it to reporters. Either way, it isn’t the message the Romney campaign should be sending right now. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842/9 "2012-09-26T02:35:00Z")
I have a hard time crediting this. From now until November, Ryan’s political career is linked to Romney’s. He goes down if Romney goes down. So knocking Romney in public (and saying around anyone except maybe his wife is making it public) would be political suicide. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842/10 "2012-09-26T02:36:23Z")
The first half of the article was worth it, the second half was a bizarre rant against Powerpoint. ---
**Author:** ![BDBoop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5e9695/32.png) [@BDBoop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BDBoop)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842/11 "2012-09-26T02:38:33Z")
I’m rather surprised Ryan hasn’t just cut the strings. “The Stench?” Seriously. ---
**Author:** ![thelurkinghorror](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7c8e57/32.png) [@thelurkinghorror](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thelurkinghorror)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842/12 "2012-09-26T02:39:49Z")
"I’m having finger sandwiches with Peggy Noonan…” Is that something like “flogging the dolphin” or “strangling the bishop”? ---
**Author:** ![BDBoop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5e9695/32.png) [@BDBoop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BDBoop)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842/13 "2012-09-26T02:40:15Z")
“Is that what the kids are calling it these days?” ---
**Author:** ![bengangmo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/50afbb/32.png) [@bengangmo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bengangmo)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842/14 "2012-09-26T02:41:37Z")
Can Ryan " resign" the VP nomination / campaign? ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842/15 "2012-09-26T02:41:47Z")
So does this mean that Ryan has… **gone rogue?** ---
**Author:** ![BDBoop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5e9695/32.png) [@BDBoop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BDBoop)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 2:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842/16 "2012-09-26T02:43:02Z")
> [@bengangmo](#): > > Can Ryan " resign" the VP nomination / campaign? I hate to answer a question with a question - but hasn’t he already done so, by continuing his campaign to hold his current seat? ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842/17 "2012-09-26T02:58:01Z")
> [@bengangmo](#): > > Can Ryan " resign" the VP nomination / campaign? Well, sure. Otherwise, involuntary servitude, right? He just has to say, “I changed my mind. Y’all go to blazes,” and he’s free as free can be. Even if it’s too late to take his name off the ballot, even if he wins (!) he could simply refuse to take the oath of office. > [@BDBoop](#): > > I hate to answer a question with a question - but hasn’t he already done so, by continuing his campaign to hold his current seat? This was covered in another thread (and I looked but can’t find it.) No, he has the legal right to run for both offices, and, if he should win both, he may choose which to accept. [It’s legal under Wisconsin law.](http://thehill.com/homenews/campaign/243227-ryan-can-run-for-house-seat-vp-at-same-time) The precedent is LBJ, running for VP and Senator at the same time in 1960. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842/18 "2012-09-26T03:26:53Z")
This has to be some kind of late April Fools’ joke. [The lobotomy board](http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/2936231/posts) is taking it seriously, though. ---
**Author:** ![Finagle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@Finagle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Finagle)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842/19 "2012-09-26T03:31:36Z")
I’m about 95% sure that the article is satire, but given the track that this campaign season has taken, it’s really, really hard to tell. ---
**Author:** ![Sitnam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Sitnam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sitnam)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2012, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842/20 "2012-09-26T03:32:07Z")
Losing ticket or not a national spot light is a great opportunity to showcase yourself. It’s worth it alone for the name recognition. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-ryan-vs-the-stench-romney-campaign-melting-down-internally-satire-warning/635842.md?page=2)