# Paul Verhoeven's Jesus Bio
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-verhoevens-jesus-bio/446579
**Category:** Cafe Society
**Created:** [April 23, 2008, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-verhoevens-jesus-bio/446579 "2008-04-23T19:02:44Z")
**Posts on this page:** 12
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@RikWriter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RikWriter)
#### Post date: [April 24, 2008, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-verhoevens-jesus-bio/446579/21 "2008-04-24T15:48:43Z")
[QUOTE=CalMeacham]
I was very surprised, on reading T.H. White’s **The Bestiary** (A book I heartily recommend) to find a footnote mentioning the story that Jesus’ real father was a Roman soldier named _Pantera_.
[/QUOTE]
Jesus’s father was an 80s metal band??? :o
---
### Author:  [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)
#### Post date: [April 24, 2008, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-verhoevens-jesus-bio/446579/22 "2008-04-24T15:57:48Z")
> [@](#):
>
> Jesus’s father was an 80s metal band???
No, it means that 80s metal bands are more cultured than you expected.
---
### Author:  [@Two\_and\_a\_Half\_Inches\_of\_Fun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Two_and_a_Half_Inches_of_Fun)
#### Post date: [April 24, 2008, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-verhoevens-jesus-bio/446579/23 "2008-04-24T16:20:02Z")
[QUOTE=drm]
I’ve always assumed the immaculate conception was just a cover up for some good old fashioned pre-marital sex. In fact I’ve toyed with the idea of pitching this very idea (except it’d be a comedy).
[/QUOTE]
The immaculate conception was the conception of Mary and it involved sex.
Just like the virgin birth, it is total bullshit, but different bullshit.
---
### Author:  [@RikWriter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RikWriter)
#### Post date: [April 24, 2008, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-verhoevens-jesus-bio/446579/24 "2008-04-24T17:18:59Z")
[QUOTE=CalMeacham]
No, it means that 80s metal bands are more cultured than you expected.
[/QUOTE]
My idea is more entertaining. 😛
---
### Author:  [@wolf\_in\_second\_hand\_clothing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolf_in_second_hand_clothing)
#### Post date: [April 24, 2008, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-verhoevens-jesus-bio/446579/25 "2008-04-24T17:31:07Z")
[QUOTE=RikWriter]
My idea is more entertaining. 😛
[/QUOTE]
Well if every woman impregnated by Pantera bore a kid with magical powers, you can expect the world to become a very interesting place in the next couple of years. Assuming they start doing anything around age 30.
---
### Author:  [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)
#### Post date: [April 24, 2008, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-verhoevens-jesus-bio/446579/26 "2008-04-24T19:24:30Z")
[QUOTE=drm]
…if this was anyone but Paul Verhoeven I’d be terribly excited about this.
[/QUOTE]
It’s _because_ it’s Verhoeven that I _am_ excited.
---
### Author:  [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)
#### Post date: [April 24, 2008, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-verhoevens-jesus-bio/446579/27 "2008-04-24T20:13:12Z")
[QUOTE=Askance]
No, it’s there all right. That book is mandatory reading for all LoB fans, some of the extra stuff in there is achingly funny. I do see why that scene was left out though, it doesn’t fit with the flow and general feel very well.
[/QUOTE]
Agreed. But I wish they could have worked in the bit where Brian meets the psychopath; and his “Forced sex, I say!” sermon; and the rant by Otto, leader of the Judean People’s Front.
---
### Author:  [@RikWriter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RikWriter)
#### Post date: [April 24, 2008, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-verhoevens-jesus-bio/446579/28 "2008-04-24T23:42:38Z")
[QUOTE=wolf in second hand clothing]
Well if every woman impregnated by Pantera bore a kid with magical powers, you can expect the world to become a very interesting place in the next couple of years. Assuming they start doing anything around age 30.
[/QUOTE]
Of course, if the women have to be virgins beforehand, I’d say we don’t have much to worry about. 😃
---
### Author:  [@drm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drm)
#### Post date: [April 24, 2008, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-verhoevens-jesus-bio/446579/29 "2008-04-24T23:56:27Z")
[QUOTE=Two and a Half Inches of Fun]
The immaculate conception was the conception of Mary and it involved sex.
Just like the virgin birth, it is total bullshit, but different bullshit.
[/QUOTE]
Wow, I’ll be damned (no pun intended). It’s more than a little embarrassing that I didn’t know that. If it helps, I’ve never been to a Catholic Church service.
The conception I meant, was Jesus. Technically though, if there was no sex, it could kind of be immaculate too, couldn’t it?
**BrainGlutton** : figures Monty Python had thought of it first. Funny stuff though, I should look for that.
> [@Cervaise](#):
>
> It’s because it’s Verhoeven that I am excited.
If he goes all Basic Instinct/Starship Troopers, I suppose that’d be pretty funny. I also wouldn’t mind seeing a Michael Bay version.
---
### Author:  [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)
#### Post date: [April 25, 2008, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-verhoevens-jesus-bio/446579/30 "2008-04-25T01:35:09Z")
Did elucidator get banned?
---
### Author:  [@Steve\_MB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_MB)
#### Post date: [April 25, 2008, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-verhoevens-jesus-bio/446579/31 "2008-04-25T02:17:46Z")
Well, anybody who saw _Starship Troopers_ knows that Verhoeven has a knack for desecration and blasphemy.
---
### Author:  [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)
#### Post date: [April 25, 2008, 8:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-verhoevens-jesus-bio/446579/32 "2008-04-25T08:43:05Z")
[QUOTE=Steve MB]
Well, anybody who saw _Starship Troopers_ knows that Verhoeven has a knack for desecration and blasphemy.
[/QUOTE]
That’s putting it mildly.
[Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/paul-verhoevens-jesus-bio/446579.md?page=1)