# Pearls of wisdom passed on to you by your elders which were wrong, wrong, wrong! **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 7, 2006, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562 "2006-07-07T22:18:48Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 12:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562/101 "2006-07-12T12:03:09Z")
[QUOTE=shizaru] I lived with my grandparents. My grandfather used to tell me not to sit on the front step of the house because sitting on stone “will give you piles”. I don’t even know what a pile is. [/QUOTE] I got that from my mother, too. But i seem to remember that the key for her was sitting on _cold_, hard surfaces. ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562/102 "2006-07-12T12:45:54Z")
[QUOTE=shizaru] It was another relative that told me the racial one, not my grandpa. Yeah, he might have had a point with the piles, but according to him letting your ass cheeks touch stone will instantly give them to you. [/QUOTE] Ah. Poor reading comprehension on my part. That’s what I get for skimming the posts. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562/103 "2006-07-12T13:11:32Z")
Wow, we’ve gone this far and no one has mentioned the “lifting your arms over your head while pregnant will cause a miscarriage” wives’ tale that is ever so popular amongst the older generations? (Or we _have_ mentioned it and I just missed it. Either way, it’s moronic.) But something that I have always wondered about, and both this thread and the ignorance about science thread have made me think more about, is why some people are so prone to “falling for” what they just happen to read in some random newspaper or tabloid article, or see a brief segment of on TV. Person X will swear up and down that doing Y will result in z, because they read about it in a magazine. Yet, no matter what other material you show them (even if it’s another article from the same magazine,) they won’t decide to believe _that_ material, just the first one. Why is this? Is it just that no one likes to admit to being wrong, or does it go deeper than that? ---
**Author:** ![BiblioCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ed8c4c/32.png) [@BiblioCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BiblioCat)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562/104 "2006-07-12T13:45:58Z")
[QUOTE=bouv] Wow, we’ve gone this far and no one has mentioned the “lifting your arms over your head while pregnant will cause a miscarriage” wives’ tale that is ever so popular amongst the older generations? [/QUOTE] My MIL told me that one when I was pregnant - but it wasn’t that it would cause me to miscarry, it was that it would wrap the cord around the baby’s neck. How are pregnant women supposed to take their shirts off? Wash their hair? As for the food poisoning one, I’ve known people who insist they have a 24-hour flu bug. In fact, the flu lasts several days, and if you’re vomiting and have the runs for just about a day, it’s most likely mild food poisoning. You can’t tell them that, though - they just _insist_ they had case of the 24-hour flu. ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562/105 "2006-07-12T13:47:23Z")
> [@bouv](#): > > Wow, we’ve gone this far and no one has mentioned the “lifting your arms over your head while pregnant will cause a miscarriage” wives’ tale that is ever so popular amongst the older generations? Ah, yes! I heard this from my mother when I was pregnant with my oldest, and was reaching up to get something out of the top shelf of the pantry. I _tried_ not to roll my eyes at her, as I explained that if it were true, I’d never be able to take my shirt off! For a wonder, she understood that, and rescinded her position! ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562/106 "2006-07-12T15:28:43Z")
[QUOTE=Batsinma Belfry] The “panty water” thing might be a version of an old wive’s tale. According to this strange bit of wisdom, if a woman wants a man to fall in love with her, she can prepare a meal for him containing a bit of her menstrual secretions. [/QUOTE] I just threw up a little in my mouth. I used to believe the whole “don’t go to bed angry” thing too, until I realized that problems reduce themselves overnight and what seemed huge in the blur of sleeplessness can be handled in the day. ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562/107 "2006-07-12T16:59:48Z")
[QUOTE=Guinastasia] She also told me that eating late at night will make me sleep badly. [/QUOTE] It can, if you have acid reflux. Having a full stomach can make you more likely to have an attack of reflux, as can lying down (gravity isn’t helping to keep the stomach contents down). Before I started on medication for acid reflux, I found that, if I ate dinner after about 9pm, I had problems with reflux when I went to bed. ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562/108 "2006-07-12T17:19:22Z")
[QUOTE=Maureen] "Only sluts/whores: …have pierced ears. …wear shoes more than two inches high. …wear red/black/any color but biege or white bras/panties. …paint their toenails. (that one I still don’t get) …ride around in fast cars." She may have had something about the last one. [/QUOTE] So, like, only whores have a good time then 🙂 think I’ll grow up to be a whore, sounds like fun. ---
**Author:** ![SnakesCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4af34b/32.png) [@SnakesCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SnakesCatLady)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562/109 "2006-07-12T18:15:07Z")
My mother’s mother told her “girls who ride in pickup trucks put out”. She wouldn’t let Moma go on a date with a boy driving a pickup truck. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562/110 "2006-07-12T20:26:44Z")
From Dad: _“Finish your plate…! Don’t you know there are starving children in India…!?”_ Yeah, and I hear the nuclear escalation with Pakistan was because Pakistani children tried to make all the starbing Indian children eat their left over congealed canned peas… :rolleyes: _“Finish every bite on that plate, or I’ll call the Police…!”_ I can only imagine how that converstion would go: _beep_So, Mr. Blucher, you want to report a …What!?_beep_ :dubious: _“Aaaaaaa, what woman would Ever have You…?”_ The one who always fixed your computer, even though you told Polish jokes at our wedding. The one I’ve been married to for 16 years; the one who gave you the only grandchildren who carry on your name. You remember them, don’t you? They’re the ones you told all my other siblings were your favorites. :smack: (That shits still spinning problems us even after we buried you, old man. You should be proud. ) _“If you’re not a Lawyer, you’re Nothing…!”_ Yes, and I was blue all day at my mortgage-burning party. 😃 _grits teeth “That’s not how you do it, This Is How You Do It!!!” grabs tools from my hands_ No, that’s not how you teach anyone anything. From Mom: _“Stop Holding Her Hand! What are you, some kind of Masher…!?”_ Yup. 😃 - “I’d love it if you lost (fill in the blank) pounds.” \* I lost weight all the time, but you never loved it; you’d just say it again and again. Took me a while to realize that love isn’t supposed to be conditional. :dubious: _“Someday, I’m going to get in that car and drive far, far away, and leaving this house behind.”_ Nice of you tell me, given I was only 4 years old. :mad: Sadly, you stayed. But then, maybe you thought it was nobler to fuck-up 7 lives, and not just one. :dubious: _“Someone who talks to themselves has money in the bank.”_ Well, to be fair, given the cost of healthcare today, I almost hope she was right on that one. _“I think my grandkids are the very best, but I’m Prejudiced!”_ Sadly true, but don’t blame your grandkids. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Cyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a88e4f/32.png) [@Cyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cyn)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562/111 "2006-07-12T20:33:22Z")
Right before I got married my mother told me that there are things my “husband might want to do that aren’t good for either one of you.” 20 years later and I’m\* still\* trying to figure out what she might have meant. I have had quite a nice time trying, too. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562/112 "2006-07-12T21:01:49Z")
One my MIL did to me, that left my mouth hanging, " You cannot raise your voice to a pregnant woman or she’ll have a difficult pregnancy ( or something) One’s I haven’t seen here: Eat the crust so you get curly hair. Ummmmmmmm, all I got was straight floss, thanks, ma! Eat all your food cause there are starving kids in Africa ( or somewhere.) I never figured out how if I ate all my food how it would exactly help some kid in some awful country who has never had a good meal in their life. Other one’s I’ve heard: Nice girls don’t join the military. ( When I wanted to go into the Army.) Nice girls don’t call boys. You need a little panty girdle. ( I was 100# and played on three sports. I walked to school - 1 mile- every day! uphhills, bothways, in the winter. Ferfucksake, I did not need a panty girdle! Talk about giving a girl a complex about her body! I definately need a panty girdle now. The best freakin’ body of my life …grumble grumble. And to go with the above Turret’s Rant: You can’t wear a red flapper’s dress, you’ll look like a loose woman. It was a vintage dress. It was so totally awesome! A girl should have her lipstick and rouge (cheek color) to match. So smudge some lipstick on your cheeks …(and get pimples)…HUZZAH! THANKS MA, but yanno, the war is over. ---
**Author:** ![Syntropy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/65b543/32.png) [@Syntropy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Syntropy)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562/113 "2006-07-12T21:15:10Z")
[QUOTE=Shirley Ujest] Nice girls don’t join the military. ( When I wanted to go into the Army.) Nice girls don’t call boys. [/QUOTE] After talking with several friends and based on my own experiences, I’ve concluded that the answer to “Nice girls don’t (fill in the blank)” is yes, they damn well do, mom. They’re just good at being discreet." ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562/114 "2006-07-12T22:32:24Z")
> [@Count Blucher](#): > > “I’d love it if you lost (fill in the blank) pounds.” > > I lost weight all the time, but you never loved it; you’d just say it again and again. Took me a while to realize that love isn’t supposed to be conditional. > > “Someday, I’m going to get in that car and drive far, far away, and leaving this house behind.” > > Nice of you tell me, given I was only 4 years old. Sadly, you stayed. But then, maybe you thought it was nobler to fuck-up 7 lives, and not just one. Holy cow! I didn’t know my mother _had_ a son! ---
**Author:** ![Chotii](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@Chotii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chotii)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562/115 "2006-07-12T22:34:58Z")
Most of the annoyingly bad ‘advice’ I’ve gotten in my life has pertained to childrearing. From my father: “Babies need to cry. It’s good for their lungs.” “Babies shouldn’t sleep in bed with you/in your bedroom. They should be in another room on the other side of the house so they don’t disturb your sleep.” “If she gets hungry enough, she’ll eat.” (Regarding my orally-aversive child who was tube-fed for nearly 5 years, and required years of therapy to learn to eat). “If you just INSIST, she’ll eat. You can’t let her run the family.” (same child) “Your house is dirty. Your kids will be sick all the time if your house is dirty.” (When somebody shows me a disease that thrives on cracker crumbs and toys strewn hither and yon, I’ll believe that.) ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562/116 "2006-07-12T22:43:44Z")
[QUOTE=Chotii] “Your house is dirty. Your kids will be sick all the time if your house is dirty.” (When somebody shows me a disease that thrives on cracker crumbs and toys strewn hither and yon, I’ll believe that.) [/QUOTE] [There’s actually a theory that the exact opposite is true](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hygiene_hypothesis)- the reason for the recent rise in asthma, allergies, and autoimmune diseases is that people are keeping their houses too clean, so kids’ immune systems aren’t developing as they should from exposure to dirt. ---
**Author:** ![Chotii](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@Chotii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chotii)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562/117 "2006-07-12T23:06:45Z")
Well, none of my kids (touch wood) has asthma _or_ allergies, at least not yet. So maybe my uh laziness has been helpful. ---
**Author:** ![Caricci](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/85f322/32.png) [@Caricci](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caricci)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562/118 "2006-07-12T23:07:04Z")
“Don’t put on a wet bathing suit or you’ll get a cold.” It’s fine to wear a wet bathing suit, but not put it on while it’s still wet. I really don’t know the logic there. ---
**Author:** ![yojimbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yojimbo/32/232_2.png) [@yojimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yojimbo)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2006, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562/119 "2006-07-12T23:53:29Z")
[QUOTE=Maureen] I’m not in any way trying to downplay the gist of your story; your grandfather sounds like a right bastard. But, you do mean he died of cirrhosis, yes? [/QUOTE] :smack: Yes I did mean that. Ah the joys of guinness and whiskey 😉 ---
**Author:** ![ladybug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/46a35a/32.png) [@ladybug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ladybug)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2006, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562/120 "2006-07-13T00:00:01Z")
“Take band instead of art so you can get into college.” – a gem from my mom. This despite the fact that I was _last chair_ in band and couldn’t play the flute to save my life. I quit after 10th grade and still got an early acceptance letter from UF. To this day Mom apologizes for making me give up my art classes. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pearls-of-wisdom-passed-on-to-you-by-your-elders-which-were-wrong-wrong-wrong/363562.md?page=7)