# Pedophilia

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pedophilia/197091>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [August 23, 2003, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pedophilia/197091 "2003-08-23T04:01:49Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 13\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![TundraWolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b3f665/32.png) [@TundraWolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TundraWolf)\
**Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pedophilia/197091/1 "2003-08-23T04:01:49Z")

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Just a random random idea.

If you have ever looked around you while growing up, some people look older than they should. At the other end of the spectrum, some people look a lot younger than they should.

My question:

What really is pedophilia?

Why I ask this question:

Suppose there are two guys(mid 20’s). They go to a club one night and they both find two pretty girls, hook up, and have fun. The next couple days, the guys try to call them for another night of fun and they get an answer of “my dad wont let me go out tonight”

What really happened:

One guy ended up with a girl that was really 13. This girl looks 18, yet is childish in every way(immature). The other girl happened to be 20, and appeared about 15, yet had the mentality of those above her age.

Now. Who is the true pedophile? While one girl is _legally_ too young, another girl is physically too young.

One person could argue that the guy going after the 18 year old is more justified because she looks older than she really is. This person would argue that if the girl was developed and really resembled an 18 year old, and that the guy believed that the girl was 18, then no harm was done. I mean, who wouldn’t date a hot 18 year old? Legally though, he goes to jail.

Another person can say that the guy going after the girl that was 20 was justified, because she really was over age, and maybe the way she carried herself would be enough to “sense” that she was older. The only problem with this that I see is that if a person is attracted to the body of a 15 year old, given the actual age of the person or not, that the person may develop a “taste” for other girls around the same stage of development(which a good percent would be girls around the age of 15).

What do you all think? Does physical age win over mental age?  
–Adam

p.s. its kinda late, so if something doesn’t make sense, blame the coffee

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**Author:** ![ParentalAdvisory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/53a042/32.png) [@ParentalAdvisory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParentalAdvisory)\
**Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pedophilia/197091/2 "2003-08-23T04:15:23Z")

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Grass on the field… 😉

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**Author:** ![TundraWolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b3f665/32.png) [@TundraWolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TundraWolf)\
**Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 4:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pedophilia/197091/3 "2003-08-23T04:16:10Z")

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hahahahahahahha

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**Author:** ![fnord1966](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ad7895/32.png) [@fnord1966](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fnord1966)\
**Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 6:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pedophilia/197091/4 "2003-08-23T06:30:01Z")

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Somebody having some regrets from last night?

Personally, ask their age, If you have doubt, check id.  
Yeah you might get laughed at, but if your slick, you can pull it off as a joke, but still get the info. Beats a statutory rape charge.

And on top of that, what kind of person has sex with someone the night they meet?

Old fashioned, yep, but sure saves a lot of hassle trying to figure out their name the next morning.

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**Author:** ![Eonwe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eonwe/32/240_2.png) [@Eonwe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eonwe)\
**Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 6:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pedophilia/197091/5 "2003-08-23T06:49:37Z")

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Honestly, I think the real issue is that of prepubescent people.

Any sexual urge towards someone obviously of biological age is acceptable, IMO, as long as one doesn’t, I don’t know, take advantage of someone psychologically.

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**Author:** ![Larry\_Griffin-Kentzel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_griffin-kentzel/32/14787_2.png) [@Larry\_Griffin-Kentzel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Griffin-Kentzel)\
**Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 10:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pedophilia/197091/6 "2003-08-23T10:10:37Z")

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This thread is better suited for [**In My Humble Opinion**](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/forumdisplay.php?s=&forumid=12). I’ll move it for you.

* * *

**Cajun Man** ~ SDMB Moderator

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**Author:** ![dctaz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9c0ed/32.png) [@dctaz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dctaz)\
**Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 10:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pedophilia/197091/7 "2003-08-23T10:32:25Z")

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gotta chime in with a bit of a correction on terms ( have a friend that is a psych major getting her doctorate). pedopheila refers to being turned on or having sex with someone that is prepubecent. there is another clinical term used for the objectification of those past puberty, but still underage. tried to google it, but could not come up with it. I thought the great cecil did an article on this a while ago, but could not find it in the archives. will search again when I get home, and post it then. as my computer here at work is now "dangerously low on resources, and I only go this window open…

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**Author:** ![dctaz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9c0ed/32.png) [@dctaz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dctaz)\
**Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 10:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pedophilia/197091/8 "2003-08-23T10:48:56Z")

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ok, rebooted, and found the word used to describe post-pubecent children interest…Ephelbophilia.

SNIP…Current psychiatric texts tend to define it [pedophilia] as sex with a pre-pubertal child – usually under 13 - by someone who is at least 5 years older (Ismund Rosen, Sexual Deviation Oxford, 1996) …/SNIP

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**Author:** ![Badtz\_Maru](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e36b37/32.png) [@Badtz\_Maru](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Badtz_Maru)\
**Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 11:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pedophilia/197091/9 "2003-08-23T11:00:01Z")

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This reminds me of something I had been pondering. I knew a girl who honestly looked about 12 at the age of 19. Not a well-developed 12, either. Mentally she was a very intelligent 19 year old. Weird thing is that I found her attractive before I got a better idea what she looked like, and it was very much a turn-off. I don’t mind small breasted women (though I prefer the more voluptuous kind), but it was beyond figure.

I started to understand why she complained about attracting creepy guys all the time - the only normal people who showed interest in her were in middle school. When she started dating some guy, people questioned whether he might be a pedophile. Apparently people had given him dirty looks when in public with her, though that may have been in their heads.

Now, what would you call someone who was in a sexual relationship with someone who was an adult and their mental equal, but had the body of a pre-pubescent child? It’s not just a hypothetical scenario, it does come up. If you had met someone like that and developed feelings for them before meeting them in person, could you deal with it? And finally, if someone DID find them physically attractive BECAUSE of their child-like features would any relationship they had with that person be tainted?

Raises a lot of questions. Human sexuality is such a mess.

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**Author:** ![TundraWolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b3f665/32.png) [@TundraWolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TundraWolf)\
**Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pedophilia/197091/10 "2003-08-23T13:30:44Z")

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yeah same here, I know a girl that i went to school with. She is really short and looks 12. she has looked 12 as long as i’ve known her. What got me thinking is that because one of my friends started dating her-- very heavily, and they moved in together not too long ago.

just wondering what you all thought about that  
–adam

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**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\
**Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pedophilia/197091/11 "2003-08-23T14:10:09Z")

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Yeah, I was really attracted to an acquaintance of one of my friends a few years ago. I say acquaintance, because while they were of opposite genders and touchy-feely with each other, I couldnt tell if they were going out, just friends, or maybe even siblings, as it looked like there was a large age difference between them. She looked and acted as if she was 15, max, maybe even 13. (I was in the mid-20s at the time.)

Later I found out that they had been going out for quite some time, but had later broken up, which doesnt dispel the age theory, but it sure makes me wish I had inquired closer as to their age and relationship ☹ I didn’t want to seem weird if it turned out she really was 13.

I think she was about 18 the first time I saw her, after all, since she was hanging around in college circles. Awww well, I can pass it off as not my type.

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**Author:** ![Stage\_Manager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stage_manager/32/7267_2.png) [@Stage\_Manager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stage_Manager)\
**Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pedophilia/197091/12 "2003-08-23T16:05:45Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by dctaz \*  
> \*\*ok, rebooted, and found the word used to describe post-pubecent children interest…Ephelbophilia.
> 
> SNIP…Current psychiatric texts tend to define it [pedophilia] as sex with a pre-pubertal child – usually under 13 - by someone who is at least 5 years older (Ismund Rosen, Sexual Deviation Oxford, 1996) …/SNIP \*\*

There are two accepted forms: Ephebophilia, and Ephebeophilia.

I prefer the latter; it just sounds better.

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**Author:** ![Stage\_Manager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stage_manager/32/7267_2.png) [@Stage\_Manager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stage_Manager)\
**Post date:** [August 23, 2003, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pedophilia/197091/13 "2003-08-23T16:07:26Z")

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Ummm. What I _meant_ was:

There are two accepted forms of the _word._

The condition isn’t widely accepted. No, not at all.
