# Penguins die in crash, octopus uninjured **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 9, 2006, 4:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968 "2006-08-09T04:38:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2006, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968/21 "2006-08-09T20:25:32Z")
[QUOTE=Draelin] Guy walks into a bar, looking very shaken, orders a shot. Bartender says “Hey, buddy, you okay?” Guy replies, “Lemme ask you something. How tall is a penguin?” Bartender looks at him in confusion, but says “I think about three feet or so, why?” Guy says “Because I think I just ran over a nun, that’s why.” Thank you, thank you, I’ll be here all week. Be sure to tip your moderators. [/QUOTE] I thought the secret to good comedy was timing? ---
**Author:** ![5que](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/5/3bc359/32.png) [@5que](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/5que)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2006, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968/22 "2006-08-09T21:01:32Z")
The penguins blew a seal. ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2006, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968/23 "2006-08-09T21:03:11Z")
[QUOTE=gigi] I thought the secret to good comedy was timing? [/QUOTE] Nah, the secret to good comedy is finishing my coffee before I post _anything_ in the morning. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Subway\_Prophet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecb155/32.png) [@Subway\_Prophet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Subway_Prophet)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2006, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968/24 "2006-08-09T21:09:23Z")
[QUOTE=5que] The penguins blew a seal. [/QUOTE] Hey, keep their private lives out of it, ok, pal? ---
**Author:** ![Pixisis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f17d59/32.png) [@Pixisis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixisis)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2006, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968/25 "2006-08-09T21:14:34Z")
[QUOTE=5que] The penguins blew a seal. [/QUOTE] Nah, they just had an ice cream cone … 😉 ---
**Author:** ![ZebraShaSha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/eada6e/32.png) [@ZebraShaSha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZebraShaSha)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2006, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968/26 "2006-08-09T21:20:33Z")
Can you imagine trying to identify the bodies? “Fuck, no, Steve, don’t let it be you! Or wait, is that Gary? Or wait, Carl, CARL?! No… Shit, why were you all wearing tuxedos?!” ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2006, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968/27 "2006-08-09T21:25:09Z")
What does a penguin get when he crosses the road? Halfway. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2006, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968/28 "2006-08-09T21:26:09Z")
[QUOTE=Pixisis] Nah, they just had an ice cream cone … 😉 [/QUOTE] Was it Sealtest ice cream? ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2006, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968/29 "2006-08-09T22:35:04Z")
I live in the Houston area, and about two months ago I was traversing the 610 loop late at night when I suddenly got stuck in a knot of traffic at the I-45 interchange. Turned out a rodeo bull had somehow got onto the highway, whereupon it was struck at high speed by someone in a Ford pickup. Lord, what a mess. This place is nuts, I tells ya. ---
**Author:** ![Declan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecae2f/32.png) [@Declan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Declan)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2006, 6:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968/30 "2006-08-10T06:37:38Z")
[QUOTE=EddyTeddyFreddy] That is the [cnn.com](http://cnn.com) headline link for [this stirring drama of life and death on a Texas highway.](http://www.cnn.com/2006/US/08/08/texas.penguins.reut/index.html) Could have been worse, though; could have been snakes in a lane: No word on whether the octopus was driving. [/QUOTE] Not bad Not one microsoft/linux reference Declan ---
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2006, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968/31 "2006-08-10T15:37:02Z")
[QUOTE=EddyTeddyFreddy] That is the [cnn.com](http://cnn.com) headline link for [this stirring drama of life and death on a Texas highway.](http://www.cnn.com/2006/US/08/08/texas.penguins.reut/index.html) Could have been worse, though; could have been snakes in a lane: No word on whether the octopus was driving. [/QUOTE] Thank God the Octopus is OK! ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2006, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968/32 "2006-08-11T02:20:41Z")
[QUOTE=Gangster Octopus] Thank God the Octopus is OK! [/QUOTE] Thank Cthulhu the octopus is okay! ---
**Author:** ![xizor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xizor/32/102_2.png) [@xizor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xizor)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2006, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968/33 "2006-08-11T15:36:49Z")
“There was another truck full of snakes and alligators that was an hour ahead of them…” Snakes on a truck? Was Samuel Jackson driving? ---
**Author:** ![simster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/simster/32/1047_2.png) [@simster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/simster)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2006, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968/34 "2006-08-11T17:06:56Z")
[QUOTE=nd\_n8] Local reports say the penguin that was driving was distracted by a large, sweaty, mostly dead cat. The cat was quoted as saying “Akkkk Thbbtbt” As an Indianapolis native, I for one will miss our late penguin overlords. ☹ [/QUOTE] Hi Bill! ---
**Author:** ![Ghanima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Ghanima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ghanima)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2006, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968/35 "2006-08-11T17:37:58Z")
I’d like to be, in the backseat With an octopus who’s drivin’, from the zoo He’d let us in, all us penguins, in his octupus’ backseat, in the shade. We would be thrown, breaking our bones To our little hideaway along the road Resting our head, on the road bed In an tiny little ditch along the road ---
**Author:** ![Exgineer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a88e4f/32.png) [@Exgineer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exgineer)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2006, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968/36 "2006-08-11T18:13:11Z")
[QUOTE=Anaamika] If I hit a penguin I’d never drive again. [/QUOTE] Are you kidding me? If I saw a penguin in the road I’d sort of aim for it, because then I could go down to the gun club and say “Hey, I bagged a penguin the other day.” ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2006, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968/37 "2006-08-11T18:37:43Z")
[QUOTE=Exgineer] Are you kidding me? If I saw a penguin in the road I’d sort of aim for it, because then I could go down to the gun club and say “Hey, I bagged a penguin the other day.” [/QUOTE] :eek: You _bastard_. You’re going to hell! ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2006, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968/38 "2006-08-11T18:48:30Z")
[QUOTE=Anaamika] :eek: You _bastard_. You’re going to hell! [/QUOTE] And I’ll sit next to him, because I thought that was _damn_ funny. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Exgineer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a88e4f/32.png) [@Exgineer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exgineer)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2006, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968/39 "2006-08-11T19:27:03Z")
Me and **Drae** , sittin’ on the bus to hell. I wonder if penguin tastes better broiled or fried. ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2006, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968/40 "2006-08-11T19:28:53Z")
[QUOTE=Exgineer] I wonder if penguin tastes better broiled or fried. [/QUOTE] I really think Penguin Parm is the way to go with this. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penguins-die-in-crash-octopus-uninjured/367968.md?page=3)