# Penii vs. Penises **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 9, 2003, 7:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998 "2003-08-09T07:29:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Mudshark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f04885/32.png) [@Mudshark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mudshark)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 7:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998/1 "2003-08-09T07:29:09Z")
I’ve seen it here, and on other message boards. People who spell the plural of penis as _penii_. **That’s not how it’s fucking spelled!** My dictionary says _penises_, and “penises” looks better than “penii” does when you read it. Plus, it’s not spelled right. ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 7:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998/2 "2003-08-09T07:37:12Z")
You shouldn’t be allowed how to spell the plural of “penis” until you have more than one, yourself. ---
**Author:** ![ProjectOmega](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b487fb/32.png) [@ProjectOmega](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ProjectOmega)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 7:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998/3 "2003-08-09T07:45:36Z")
I always thought “penii” was a joke. Does anyone actually use “penii” in a serious, formal way? ---
**Author:** ![Briny\_Deep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/briny_deep/32/17188_2.png) [@Briny\_Deep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Briny_Deep)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 7:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998/4 "2003-08-09T07:56:30Z")
Shouldn’t it properly be _penes_, anyway? It’s been years since I’ve studied Latin, and I’m not sure if that word came up… ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 7:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998/5 "2003-08-09T07:59:22Z")
The plural of the Latin word _penis_ is _penes_. In English, _penises_ is more common, but _penes_ is also used (Steinbeck uses it in the first few pages of _The Grapes of Wrath_). _Penii_ is just a solecism. (And while we’re at it, the plural of the Latin word _virus_ is _virus_, not _virii_ or any such silliness.) ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Nader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Darth\_Nader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Nader)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 11:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998/6 "2003-08-09T11:19:18Z")
\*\*SUNDAY, SUNDAY, SUNDAY!!! \*\* The fight you’ve been waiting for: The English language versus Latan grammar in the fight to \*\*END IT ALL! BE THERE!\*\* Special appearance by The Pedantic Fools With Flamethrowers! **SUNDAY, SUNDAY SUNDAY!!!** [sub]So what’s the plural of “doofus”?[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Silentgoldfish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e36b37/32.png) [@Silentgoldfish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silentgoldfish)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998/7 "2003-08-09T16:50:44Z")
Doofi. I’ve fairly sure I saw it in Calvin and Hobbes. ---
**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998/8 "2003-08-09T16:55:20Z")
> [@](#): > > I always thought “penii” was a joke. Does anyone actually use “penii” in a serious, formal way? I used “penii” [recently](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=203349) and I was just kidding. It’s like “boxen” for plural quantities of computers or “coffus” for a solitary cup of coffee. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998/9 "2003-08-09T17:11:21Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Darth Nader \* > \*\* The English language versus Latan grammar in the fight to \*\*END IT ALL! > > BE THERE!\*\*\*\* Not to nitpick, but you really should work on your parallelism there. It probably should be “The English language versus the Latin language” \ ---
**Author:** ![light\_strand](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a6a055/32.png) [@light\_strand](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/light_strand)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998/10 "2003-08-09T18:07:50Z")
Sorry Matt, but the plural of _virus_ is _viruses_. The virii thing pisses me off, and I see it here all the time. I work in the biopharmaceutical industry, and I have never heard a professional in the industry refer to the plural of virus as anything but viruses. It’s viruses people! [sub]When you write “virus” repeatedly it look weird[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Eonwe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eonwe/32/240_2.png) [@Eonwe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eonwe)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998/11 "2003-08-09T19:26:32Z")
**matt\_mcl** said what I came in to say. Oh well. The trick is that in latin there are different plural endings; sometimes it’s ‘i’, as in ‘magi’, sometimes it’s es, as in **matt** ’s example, and other times it’s ‘us’. Oh, and **ProjectOmega** , > [@](#): > > Does anyone actually use “penii” in a serious, formal way? Sure, as in, “I could really go for some penii pasta right now!” ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998/12 "2003-08-09T19:30:58Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by light strand \* > \*\*Sorry Matt, but the plural of _virus_ is _viruses_. The virii thing pisses me off, and I see it here all the time. Like I said: the plural of the **Latin** word _virus_ is _virus_. I didn’t say anything about the English word. ---
**Author:** ![light\_strand](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a6a055/32.png) [@light\_strand](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/light_strand)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998/13 "2003-08-09T19:37:06Z")
Ahhh, my reading comprehension is not so good. Sorry ---
**Author:** ![ErinPuff](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dbc845/32.png) [@ErinPuff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ErinPuff)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998/14 "2003-08-09T19:45:25Z")
My brother insists on saying “penii” and it angers me. I scared myself once by saying “dominatrices” in casual conversation. ---
**Author:** ![porcupine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ac91a4/32.png) [@porcupine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/porcupine)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998/15 "2003-08-09T22:59:55Z")
I know the correct plural is not “penii” but I like to say it because it sounds friendlier. ---
**Author:** ![Ms\_Boods](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5e9695/32.png) [@Ms\_Boods](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms_Boods)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998/16 "2003-08-09T23:17:23Z")
Small hijack: there were a pair of twins at my school called Doberenz, and the wee Latin expert (me! me!) started the trend of referring to both of them as the Doberi…eventually their own parents did, as well, as I recall… Yes, I was the 'orrible kid in the back of the cinema who knew it was Romani ite domum… ---
**Author:** ![Stage\_Manager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stage_manager/32/7267_2.png) [@Stage\_Manager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stage_Manager)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998/17 "2003-08-10T00:44:06Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by porcupine \* > \*\*I know the correct plural is not “penii” but I like to say it because it sounds friendlier. \*\* So how is “penii” actually pronounced? ---
**Author:** ![jackelope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a6a055/32.png) [@jackelope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackelope)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998/18 "2003-08-10T00:46:50Z")
This thread makes me cry. I believe I’ll go look for a box of Kleenices. ---
**Author:** ![ProjectOmega](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b487fb/32.png) [@ProjectOmega](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ProjectOmega)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 5:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998/19 "2003-08-10T05:15:48Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mikie \* > \*\*So how is “penii” actually pronounced? \*\* Peen-eye? That’s how I say it. ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998/20 "2003-08-10T05:22:09Z")
If you all don’t stop squabbling I’ll bring down the penal code on your heads. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penii-vs-penises/193998.md?page=2)