# Penis Sensitivity **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 1, 2009, 6:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penis-sensitivity/515922 "2009-11-01T06:59:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penis-sensitivity/515922/21 "2009-11-03T16:09:22Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > Also I suggest being open with your partner about this, it is very likely you are together to heal, being open with her would give the greatest benefit. Yeah, this too. I’ve been with a guy who just couldn’t come unless he was the one doing the stimulation. He was upfront about it. I was fine with it. But I sensed that it really did bother him that he thought it bothered me. And it bothered him, too. I think all of his worry made him worse off. So stay relaxed, talk with your girl about it, and don’t let it spiral into a mental problem that you can’t work your way out of. ---
**Author:** ![ToeJam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dfb087/32.png) [@ToeJam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ToeJam)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penis-sensitivity/515922/22 "2009-11-03T18:18:29Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > If you are spiritual I would suggest praying for God to sever any ties to past thoughts/fantasies of sexual partners and if needed practices in thought or acted out (such as bondage, enforced chastity, pain associated with the pleasure of sex, gender reversal fantasies, etc.), if you are not spiritual perhaps try to work out the issues in other ways. I always enjoy seeing you post somewhere that’s not a GD/GQ/Pit area of the boards on a topic that I normally don’t expect to see you in. Thanks for the smile. ---
**Author:** ![FallenAngel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@FallenAngel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FallenAngel)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penis-sensitivity/515922/23 "2009-11-03T18:41:30Z")
I’ll echo what was said above and add, even if you are feeling relaxed, you may well be uptight about the orgasming part of the process and over-thinking yourself to frustration during the act. Back in my single days, I had a bit of a hangup with receiving oral. It took several attempts before any given woman could make me climax that way. It felt great, but I was so concerned with the, “Do I come in her mouth, how much advanced warning should I give, what if she stops too soon,” etc. etc. I just couldn’t relax enough to let loose. It’s kind of a Zen thing - when you stop thinking about it it happens quite naturally. ---
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penis-sensitivity/515922/24 "2009-11-03T19:46:15Z")
I have difficulty acheiving orgasm sometimes, and what works for me is what others have mentioned, stop masturbating. Save it as an occasional treat, but otherwise save it for your partner. ---
**Author:** ![SiXSwordS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/49beb7/32.png) [@SiXSwordS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SiXSwordS)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penis-sensitivity/515922/25 "2009-11-03T20:32:07Z")
> [@control-z](#): > > … stop masturbating. Save it as an occasional treat, but otherwise save it for your partner. Or masturbate _with_ your partner. I dated a woman for a while who never climaxed through intercourse. She enjoyed “standard” sex and then afterward we would play with her sex toys until she climaxed. Not always and not every time, but fairly frequently. ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2009, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penis-sensitivity/515922/26 "2009-11-04T00:12:49Z")
> [@ToeJam](#): > > I always enjoy seeing you post somewhere that’s not a GD/GQ/Pit area of the boards on a topic that I normally don’t expect to see you in. > Thanks for the smile. I’m glad I can help, as smiles are important 🙂 Really I enjoy these too, getting away from the great debates and using what I believe has been given to me in real life. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2009, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penis-sensitivity/515922/27 "2009-11-04T02:52:53Z")
A sensitive penis? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Wheelz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wheelz/32/5718_2.png) [@Wheelz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wheelz)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2009, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penis-sensitivity/515922/28 "2009-11-04T14:08:41Z")
**Quasimodal** , most of us guys had exactly the opposite problem when we started having sex. 🙂 (In fact, I would have suspected a whoosh if you weren’t a longtime and well-known Doper.) But I think the solution is the same: Relax, you’ll get better at it the more you do it. ---
**Author:** ![SiXSwordS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/49beb7/32.png) [@SiXSwordS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SiXSwordS)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2009, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penis-sensitivity/515922/29 "2009-11-04T14:18:30Z")
> [@Wheelz](#): > > **Quasimodal** , most of us guys had exactly the opposite problem when we started having sex. 🙂 Yes… immediately after I started. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Interconnected\_Series\_of\_Tubes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/13edae/32.png) [@Interconnected\_Series\_of\_Tubes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Interconnected_Series_of_Tubes)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2009, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penis-sensitivity/515922/30 "2009-11-04T17:05:44Z")
> [@Wheelz](#): > > **Quasimodal** , most of us guys had exactly the opposite problem when we started having sex. 🙂 (In fact, I would have suspected a whoosh if you weren’t a longtime and well-known Doper.) > But I think the solution is the same: Relax, you’ll get better at it the more you do it. Most? Well, maybe SOME. I ran into a similar difficulty when first making the hand-\>vagina transition. The biggest problem in my experience is the impossibly hard, fast stroke guys use when things aren’t working out (confused? Watch a porno. See the rhythm the male talent uses to achieve orgasm during the money shot?) No way you can get that kind of raw stimulation when you need to move your hips, rather than your hand, that quickly. I would suggest trying doggy-style if things aren’t working out as this lets you modulate your thrusts, pace and depth of penetration with ease. If all else fails (as others have mentioned) a “failed attempt” earlier in the day will virtually guarantee a speedy finish the next time around. Failure to orgasm during oral is, at the risk of getting attacked here, usually a fault of the giver rather than givee. Most girls don’t appreciate the nervous layout of the average turgid cock all the well. Tongue-dragging along the underside and liberal twisting pumping hand action often does the trick. Good luck! I still can’t usually cum with a condom on, though. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/penis-sensitivity/515922.md?page=1)