# People stealing my lunch, is it ok to make a cat food sandwich? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 7, 2009, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169 "2009-09-07T16:15:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MPB_in_Salt_Lake)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169/61 "2009-09-08T02:15:00Z")
> [@appleciders](#): > > Do not do this. This is illegal. This is unethical. This is disproportionate to the theft. And many workplaces have cameras covering the parking lot. You are right, and if this happened to me I would NOT actually vandalize the thiefs car—I wouldnt allow someones unethical, anti-social behavior to cause ME to act unethically or in an anti-social manner. That said, if people like the thief were assaulted or had thier property damaged in retaliation for thier theft, maybe they would think twice before taking something that does not belong to them… Then again, someone who would behave in this manner in the first place may not be intelligent enough to learn thier lesson, even if the lesson is taught to them the hard way. ---
**Author:** ![nikonikosuru](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5f8ce5/32.png) [@nikonikosuru](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nikonikosuru)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169/62 "2009-09-08T02:17:09Z")
> [@MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](#): > > I would bet that the thefts have nothing to do with food (and the stolen lunches are doubtlessly thrown away, not eaten) but instead someones warped urge to dominate and abuse a coworker… Man, the thought that there are people out there who get their rocks off by doing crap like that is pretty depressing but I bet people like that do exist. ---
**Author:** ![Serenata67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/serenata67/32/10646_2.png) [@Serenata67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Serenata67)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169/63 "2009-09-08T02:18:12Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > Gosh, I love the “bring two sandwiches” suggestions. What pussies. First, what makes you think the thief won’t steal both? Second, why should the OP willingly pay to feed thieves on a regular basis? > > Hey, I’m currently a bit short on groceries. Mind if I come over and help myself to your pantry? I assure you, I’m in dire financial straights and could really use the food. I am soooo with you. ---
**Author:** ![Fell\_through\_the\_Ice](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a9adbd/32.png) [@Fell\_through\_the\_Ice](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fell_through_the_Ice)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169/64 "2009-09-08T02:30:36Z")
I am ashamed to admit that I was a lunch-stealer once. ☹ I was in my late teens and in a group-home situation. I had a part-time summer temp job at a county government office building doing low-level clerical work (stuffing tax notices into envelopes, stuff like that). I was barely making minimum wage and had almost no money. I was always hungry. So, um, yeah, I pretty much stole from the office building’s fridges several times a week for food. I feel bad about it now. I was just so damn hungry all the time at that age and in that circumstance. It’s no excuse. It was stealing. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![rowrrbazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rowrrbazzle/32/414_2.png) [@rowrrbazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rowrrbazzle)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169/65 "2009-09-08T02:42:42Z")
> [@lavenderviolet](#): > > Personally, I might try something a little milder like putting a sign on my food saying “Notice: I am now licking each of my food items to mark them as mine” as you would think that would be gross enough to deter most people without being a “trap”. Unfortunately, the response could easily be for someone to leave a note saying “I spit in them.” > [@](#): > > However, if I were on the jury who was hearing the case about some sociopath who thinks they are entitled to other people’s food whining about getting a duped by a cat food sandwich, I certainly would understand why you did it. Me too. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169/66 "2009-09-08T03:27:42Z")
> [@Hello\_Again](#): > > Laws vary by jurisdiction blah blah this is not legal advice but usually (usually) for an Intentional Infliction of Emotional Distress claim, usually (usually) the plaintiff must experience “extreme emotional distress” and the defendant’s conduct must be “extreme and outrageous.” A snail negligently in a soft drink was enough to give English law Donoghue v. Stevenson, including Atken’s neighbour principle: [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zWia3GCzyLQ](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zWia3GCzyLQ) [http://www.leeds.ac.uk/law/hamlyn/donoghue.htm](http://www.leeds.ac.uk/law/hamlyn/donoghue.htm) If the thief goes yum, dog food, then no harm done. If the thief goes yuck, dog food, then there’s not enough harm done to go anywhere. If the thief goes barf, barf, barf, dog food, generally does a drama queen flip out, and takes a few days off from work for stress, and complains of mental upset for an extended period, then Bob’s your uncle as far as a civil suit goes. BTW, cat kibble is sufficiently nutritious that if one were to feed it to one’s grandfather each day at breakfast for a week under the guise of it being breakfast cereal, then one would find that one’s grandfather would have a great deal of energy with which to chase one with a plastic lawn mower for an extended period upon discovering what he had been fed. ---
**Author:** ![nikonikosuru](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5f8ce5/32.png) [@nikonikosuru](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nikonikosuru)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169/67 "2009-09-08T03:36:55Z")
> [@Muffin](#): > > BTW, cat kibble is sufficiently nutritious that if one were to feed it to one’s grandfather each day at breakfast for a week under the guise of it being breakfast cereal, then one would find that one’s grandfather would have a great deal of energy with which to chase one with a plastic lawn mower for an extended period upon discovering what he had been fed. _takes notes_ But would he be any better at catching mice? ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169/68 "2009-09-08T03:49:24Z")
> [@nikonikosuru](#): > > _takes notes_ > But would he be any better at catching mice? Don’t know about mice, but he darn near caught me. Took well over half an hour before he ran out of steam. ---
**Author:** ![nikonikosuru](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5f8ce5/32.png) [@nikonikosuru](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nikonikosuru)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169/69 "2009-09-08T03:57:20Z")
> [@Muffin](#): > > Don’t know about mice, but he darn near caught me. Took well over half an hour before he ran out of steam. That’s insane. There’s gotta be a way to market that. I’m always seeing commercials for those senior vitamins and nutritional drinks so there’s a fortune to be made here. And how on earth did you get him to eat it for a week? Did you convince him it was just meat flavored cereal? Blegh! ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 3:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169/70 "2009-09-08T03:58:52Z")
I’d go with the cat food sandwich first, and then the nanny cam. Anyone who would steal food would probably steal from the company, too. And if at all possible, show the video to the boss (unless it’s the boss who’s stealing). ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169/71 "2009-09-08T04:02:23Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > show the video to the boss (unless it’s the boss who’s stealing). Then blackmail the boss. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![commasense](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/commasense/32/3017_2.png) [@commasense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/commasense)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169/72 "2009-09-08T04:09:48Z")
> [@DigitalC](#): > > Its way too hot to keep something like a tuna sandwich at my desk. If you’re worried that the mayonnaise will go bad, [you needn’t worry](http://homecooking.about.com/od/howtocookwithcondiments/a/mayospoilage.htm). > [@](#): > > It is perfectly safe to carry a tuna salad sandwich for lunch with no refrigeration… ---
**Author:** ![Runs\_With\_Scissors](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/278dde/32.png) [@Runs\_With\_Scissors](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Runs_With_Scissors)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169/73 "2009-09-08T04:12:33Z")
> [@Fell\_through\_the\_Ice](#): > > I am ashamed to admit that I was a lunch-stealer once. ☹ > > I was in my late teens and in a group-home situation. I had a part-time summer temp job at a county government office building doing low-level clerical work (stuffing tax notices into envelopes, stuff like that). > > I was barely making minimum wage and had almost no money. I was always hungry. So, um, yeah, I pretty much stole from the office building’s fridges several times a week for food. I feel bad about it now. I was just so damn hungry all the time at that age and in that circumstance. > > It’s no excuse. It was stealing. ☹ Let those without sin, casting stones, etc. I’m just thrilled to know why someone steals lunches. In this case I at least know. (And didn’t want to start a new thread about it.) Thanks for your honesty. ---
**Author:** ![DMark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@DMark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DMark)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 6:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169/74 "2009-09-08T06:46:05Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > And if at all possible, show the video to the boss (unless it’s the boss who’s stealing). You probably meant that in jest, but when I was working for a law firm, I had to stay late one evening and, walking by the kitchen, I see one of the head attorneys just taking things from the fridge - yogurt, soft drinks, a hostess cupcake - that I know are from other employees. (And yes, I told those employees the next day, and although they found it kind of funny that I had “caught” the thief in action, they never said anything but at least no longer felt the need to accuse/wonder about their other co-workers.) ---
**Author:** ![Gus\_Handsome](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e68b1a/32.png) [@Gus\_Handsome](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gus_Handsome)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 6:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169/75 "2009-09-08T06:59:06Z")
You people are all too kind. Call me a prick or whatever, but if some cretin were stealing my lunch, I would have a nice dog shit sandwhich waiting for them, nicely packaged in the fridge. Call me old fashioned if you want, but there’s a few things you don’t fuck with: People’s family, money and food. Stealing someone’s lunch is just plain wrong and deserves a swift beating. ---
**Author:** ![nivlac](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3bc359/32.png) [@nivlac](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nivlac)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 7:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169/76 "2009-09-08T07:45:22Z")
Here’s hoping your revenge sandwich works. However … if it doesn’t, go get a more secured lunchbox (say, with a padlock) and chain it to the inside of the frig! It’ll look weird in the frig, but who can fault you if the lunch thief won’t stop. ---
**Author:** ![Tinkertoy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f19dbf/32.png) [@Tinkertoy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tinkertoy)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 8:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169/77 "2009-09-08T08:24:07Z")
> [@Quartz](#): > > A good dollop of [Dave’s Insanity Sauce](http://www.chilliworld.com/SP6.asp?p_id=41) or [Scorned Woman](http://www.scorchio.co.uk/scorned-woman-sauce-p-610.html) should do the trick very nicely. Yes it does. I had problems with someone stealing my lunch at work a couple years ago. Made deviled eggs with a nice big pool of Dave’s Insanity Sauce under the filling. Never lost a lunch after that. ---
**Author:** ![Grumman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/43a26b/32.png) [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 9:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169/78 "2009-09-08T09:14:26Z")
Remember, if all else fails, there’s always jury nullification. ---
**Author:** ![Mollie\_Magill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mollie_magill/32/20882_2.png) [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169/79 "2009-09-08T13:09:51Z")
> [@Gus\_Handsome](#): > > You people are all too kind. > Call me a prick or whatever, but if some cretin were stealing my lunch, I would have a nice dog shit sandwhich waiting for them, nicely packaged in the fridge. > > Call me old fashioned if you want, but there’s a few things you don’t fuck with: > People’s family, money and food. > > Stealing someone’s lunch is just plain wrong and deserves a swift beating. Dog Shit Sandwich = assault. Tuna and Jabanero Pepper sandwich is edible and would not be assault. There’s also the added bonus that the perp would be suffering mexican heartburn a day later. Hot peppers - the gift that keeps on giving. ---
**Author:** ![LavenderBlue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e95f7d/32.png) [@LavenderBlue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LavenderBlue)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2009, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169/80 "2009-09-08T14:18:58Z")
> [@PapSett](#): > > I did almost exactly this once. There was a Hardees on my way to work and two days in a row, I stopped for a sandwich, and when lunch break came, my Hardees bag and the styrofoam container was still there but the sandwich was gone. On day 3, without telling a soul what I was about to do, I took that styrofoam box, a hamburger bun, and a can of sliced Mighty Dog food. I rinsed the gravy off and put it on the bun, with sliced onion and lettuce peeping out of the bun, and left it in my usual place. Went in at lunch, and the bag was gone. > > I found it in the parking lot, the sandwich HALF EATEN. Think about that for a moment. They ate half of it before going, “Hey… you know, this tastes like…” The next day I put up a sign on the lunchroom bulletin board with the label from the dog food on it, and it said something like ‘In case you liked the sandwich you stole yesterday and want another just like it, this is what I used.’ > > My lunch was never stolen from that workplace again. That’s hysterically funny but I tend to think that says more about the quality of a Hardees hamburger than about the thief. 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-stealing-my-lunch-is-it-ok-to-make-a-cat-food-sandwich/509169.md?page=5)