# People who don't correct you even when you're embarrasingly wrong **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 13, 2013, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150 "2013-08-13T19:45:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2013, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150/1 "2013-08-13T19:45:28Z")
Now I don’t like being corrected for a minor thing, and it’s kind of pedantic and annoying when certain people (you know who you are!) correct you IRL every time you make a slip up. I once had a person in the SCA rag on me for the incorrect pronunciation of a local town (I had put the accent on the wrong syllable), saying obviously I was new to the area, etc. (I’ve lived in the area for 20 years. Just not that town.) Fine, make a little fun, but he went on for seven minutes (I checked my watch). I was kind of new to the SCA and wanted to make friends, so I didn’t bitch-slap him, unfortunately. But on the other hand, there’s stuff like this. Someone in my office recently went on vacation. They said they were going to “Grand Cayman” but I misheard and thought they said “Grand Canyon.” So I spent time talking about how while the Canyon didn’t really interest _me_, it still sounded pretty cool, and what a wonderful time they would have, and were they going to walk on the glass walkway? This glass walkway (and here I googled it and showed her). But you know what? She never once corrected me! She smiled and chatted about it and never mentioned anything. It was _weeks_ later before I overheard her talking to someone else and I realized she had gone to Grand _Cayman_! I was mortified, I tell you. I still haven’t brought it up to her. For one, it’s been months. For another, what would I say? “Remember my stupidity? Hur dur dur.” Times like this I wish people _would_ correct me. Other people have had this happen to them, right? Stories? What do you think of these people? ---
**Author:** ![Mrs.Cake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2acd7d/32.png) [@Mrs.Cake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mrs.Cake)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2013, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150/2 "2013-08-13T20:13:15Z")
Agreed. It’s like I would really rather someone told me I had spinach in my teeth than discover it hours later for myself, usually after a Board meeting. Something that should have been a minor oops, corrected, laughed at and soon forgotten, becomes a huge long-lasting source of mortification. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2013, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150/3 "2013-08-13T20:17:35Z")
Maybe they were just stunned into agreement by your disinterest in the Grand Canyon. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2013, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150/4 "2013-08-13T20:26:25Z")
> [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#): > > Maybe they were just stunned into agreement by your disinterest in the Grand Canyon. It’s a giant hole in the ground. Not my interest! When I travel I like to look at zoos, aquariums, museums, shows and stuff like that. I guess “culture” rather than “nature”. ---
**Author:** ![Sicks\_Ate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Sicks\_Ate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sicks_Ate)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2013, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150/5 "2013-08-13T20:28:38Z")
I’ve been guilty of this at least a couple times. Always regarding people asking how my wife is…long after I was divorced. I know I shouldn’t have just said “Oh, fine”…but either there were people around whose business it wasn’t, or I didn’t feel like talking about it. So, eventually they learn and feel bad. ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2013, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150/6 "2013-08-13T20:29:14Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > It’s a giant hole in the ground. Not my interest! When I travel I like to look at zoos, aquariums, museums, shows and stuff like that. I guess “culture” rather than “nature”. [Clark W. Griswold] Jesus, it’s only the biggest God-damn hole in the world. [/Clark W. Griswold] ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2013, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150/7 "2013-08-13T20:30:18Z")
> [@Shagnasty](#): > > [Clark W. Griswold] Jesus, it’s only the biggest God-damn hole in the world. [/Clark W. Griswold] Well, that made me giggle. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2013, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150/8 "2013-08-13T20:32:00Z")
What I find worse then people who don’t correct me when I’m wrong is people that will not only not correct but will adopt MY way of being incorrect just so they don’t insult me. For example, I was on a new drug (new to me, not new new) called Topamax. I thought it was pronounced TOP-a-max (like Top as in the top of something). The first few times I would tell people, like a nurse at a dr’s appointment I was on Topamax she would nod and add it to my chart. But one nurse actually said it that way. It was a good year before I found out it was pronouced tope-a-max. The funny thing was, about a third of the time I would say say “Topamax” (incorrectly), a third of the time I would say “Topamax or is it tope-a-max, I’m never sure how to say it” and they would just write it down and not correct me and the rest of the time I just said topiramate since that was easier. Someone at some point could have just told me how to say it, and that one nurse really messed with my head when she said it the correct way first and then I said it the wrong way (because I was used to saying it that way) and then she started saying it that way too. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2013, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150/9 "2013-08-13T20:36:08Z")
> [@Sicks\_Ate](#): > > I’ve been guilty of this at least a couple times. Always regarding people asking how my wife is…long after I was divorced. I’m very happily divorced. The other day a woman approached me at work and told me she was good friends with my wife. I deadpanned and said, “You must be mistaken, I’m **not** married.” Well, I’m not! ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2013, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150/10 "2013-08-13T20:37:56Z")
> [@Joey\_P](#): > > What I find worse then people who don’t correct me when I’m wrong is people that will not only not correct but will adopt MY way of being incorrect just so they don’t insult me. It’s sort of amusing that my friend and I are both trying the opposite of this with each other with regards to the pronunciation of habanero. It doesn’t have a tilde, so I pronounce it very clearly without the tilde when I talk about it — ah-bah-NAIR-oh, whereas he is convinced it does and so he emphasizes the ah-bah-NYER-oh when talking about the pepper, in his mind subtly correcting me (whereas I’m subtly correcting him and neither one of us wants to outright broach the subject of mispronunciation.) ---
**Author:** ![Sicks\_Ate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Sicks\_Ate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sicks_Ate)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2013, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150/11 "2013-08-13T20:39:54Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > I’m very happily divorced. The other day a woman approached me at work and told me she was good friends with my wife. I deadpanned and said, “You must be mistaken, I’m **not** married.” > > Well, I’m not! Heh, if that happened to me my response would be “Then you don’t know what she says about you behind your back.” :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2013, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150/12 "2013-08-13T20:40:03Z")
> [@Ludovic](#): > > It’s sort of amusing that my friend and I are both trying the opposite of this with each other with regards to the pronunciation of habanero. It doesn’t have a tilde, so I pronounce it very clearly without the tilde when I talk about it — ah-bah-NAIR-oh, whereas he is convinced it does and so he emphasizes the ah-bah-NYER-oh when talking about the pepper, in his mind subtly correcting me (whereas I’m subtly correcting him and neither one of us wants to outright broach the subject of mispronunciation.) No tilde. From the first paragraph of the habanero Wiki… When used in English, it is sometimes spelled (and pronounced) habañero—the diacritical mark being added as a [hyperforeignism](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hyperforeignism) I always figure people do that because jalapeño is spelled with an ñ and since they’re both hot peppers and they both have similar sounding last syllables, they must both have tildes. Also, fun fact, in the Spanish alphabet, n and ñ are two distinct letters. ñ is not an n with a tilde over it. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2013, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150/13 "2013-08-13T22:04:22Z")
> [@Ludovic](#): > > It’s sort of amusing that my friend and I are both trying the opposite of this with each other with regards to the pronunciation of habanero. It doesn’t have a tilde, so I pronounce it very clearly without the tilde when I talk about it — ah-bah-NAIR-oh, whereas he is convinced it does and so he emphasizes the ah-bah-NYER-oh when talking about the pepper, in his mind subtly correcting me (whereas I’m subtly correcting him and neither one of us wants to outright broach the subject of mispronunciation.) That’s funny. I never realized there was no tilde! :eek: I once asked a friend if he drove from Japan to Cambodia. He didn’t remind me that Japan is an island, he just said, ‘‘no.’’ About three beats later I said, ‘‘That is the stupidest question I have ever asked.’’ To which he replied, ‘‘Yes. Yes it was.’’ ---
**Author:** ![Tamerlane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tamerlane/32/7602_2.png) [@Tamerlane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tamerlane)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2013, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150/14 "2013-08-13T22:22:50Z")
Brief hijack… > [@Anaamika](#): > > It’s a giant hole in the ground. Not my interest! I _do_ like nature stuff quite a bit, but I had much the same opinion at one time - big hole in the ground, probably kinda neat, but y’know…still just a big hole in the ground :). But in person it was wayyyyy more spectacular than I ever expected. Like set to ‘Ode to Joy’ spectacular. I wouldn’t make a special trip if you’re truly not an outdoorsy person, but if you ever are driving by on your way somewhere else I’d recommend taking the detour to check it out. Just in case you might find yourself similarly bowled over. ---
**Author:** ![Missy2U](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3bc359/32.png) [@Missy2U](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Missy2U)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2013, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150/15 "2013-08-13T23:00:43Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > I’m very happily divorced. The other day a woman approached me at work and told me she was good friends with my wife. I deadpanned and said, “You must be mistaken, I’m **not** married.” > > Well, I’m not! Snort - had to share this - ran into an ex (he was 17 years ago - maybe 14 years ago when this happened) in a store - I was with my husband. He walked up to me and said the whole “Hi Missy, how’s it going and blah blah blah - how’s your son, etc.” - everything - I told him he must be mistaken. I wasn’t “Missy”. My husband almost had a coronary trying not to laugh as we walked out. The look on ex’s face was priceless. But I’m kind of a bitch like that. 😃 Back to your regularly scheduled thread. SORRY! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2013, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150/16 "2013-08-14T00:29:20Z")
> [@Tamerlane](#): > > But in person it was wayyyyy more spectacular than I ever expected. Like set to ‘Ode to Joy’ spectacular. I wouldn’t make a special trip if you’re truly not an outdoorsy person, but if you ever are driving by on your way somewhere else I’d recommend taking the detour to check it out. Just in case you might find yourself similarly bowled over. I think I was 15 or so when my family went to see it. I wasn’t so bowled over by it until we heard a helicopter, and looked all over for it. Finally someone spotted it, “there it is!” while pointing far down and to the left. So big a helicopter was visually lost in it, just a speck to those of us trying to find it from the rim. Sorry about the continued hijack. I’m one to stop and correct if it’s something like mixing up vacation destinations, I will tell you there’s a big gob of spinach in your teeth, or that your makeup isn’t blended at your jaw. I wish others would do the same for me. Hey, check your fly. ---
**Author:** ![flatlined](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb9ed0/32.png) [@flatlined](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flatlined)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2013, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150/17 "2013-08-14T00:34:32Z")
I don’t like to correct people, so had you done that to me, I probably would have assumed that you had moved on from my vacation plans to yours and would have happily discussed it with you. **Tamerlane** is right about the Grand Canyon, btw. The first time I went, I went to the meteor crator bacause that big hole in the ground was interesting. The Grand Canyon was a stop because it was on the way to where I was going next. Holy cow and OMG!!! **Spice Weasel** , my online study partner is Polish. When I told him that I was now slogging through the English/Latin version of The Works of Julius Ceasor, he told me the first line by memory. Long discussion ensued, and at one point I asked him if he still had his copy because I’d love to see it and his notes. When I say something really dumb, he just changes the subject and moves on. After a while, I realized that his copy was Polish/Latin and that I’d not be able to read his notes…not to mention that his copy was probably lost when he fled martial law. I apologized for the stupid question, and he kindly told me that I wasn’t stupid, I was just an American. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2013, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150/18 "2013-08-14T02:56:56Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > People who don’t correct you even when you’re embarrasingly wrong There are two Ss in “embarrassingly.” Don’t you feel more comfortable now? 😉 > [@](#): > > I once had a person in the SCA rag on me for the incorrect pronunciation of a local town (I had put the accent on the wrong syllable), saying obviously I was new to the area, etc. (I’ve lived in the area for 20 years. Just not that town.) Fine, make a little fun, but he went on for seven minutes (I checked my watch). I was kind of new to the SCA and wanted to make friends, so I didn’t bitch-slap him, unfortunately. I went to my first, and last, SCA meeting in 1973. I realized that while I could, eventually, reach that level of pedantic assholery I didn’t want to. I’m sure that present company does not include anybody from that group because the SCA people here are very nice, but that group had me wanting to bitch-slap total strangers. ---
**Author:** ![Apollyon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/apollyon/32/4238_2.png) [@Apollyon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Apollyon)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2013, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150/19 "2013-08-14T03:00:27Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > I once had a person in the SCA rag on me for the incorrect pronunciation of a local town … he went on for seven minutes (I checked my watch). Just be glad it was only mispronunciation… if you’d used the wrong stitching on your houppelande you might still be hearing about it. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2013, 8:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150/20 "2013-08-14T08:11:49Z")
> [@Ludovic](#): > > It’s sort of amusing that my friend and I are both trying the opposite of this with each other with regards to the pronunciation of habanero. It doesn’t have a tilde, so I pronounce it very clearly without the tilde when I talk about it — ah-bah-NAIR-oh, whereas he is convinced it does and so he emphasizes the ah-bah-NYER-oh when talking about the pepper, in his mind subtly correcting me (whereas I’m subtly correcting him and neither one of us wants to outright broach the subject of mispronunciation.) Uh? You’re both stressing it in the same syllable in which it’s stressed in Spanish (as indicated by the lack of a tilde), what you’re using is different vowels. What’s the tilde have to do with which vowel(s) to use? ETA: oooh, you’re talking about a tilde on the N! Sorry, I get confused easily. Re-ETA: why are you _also_ using different vowels for the “e”? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-dont-correct-you-even-when-youre-embarrasingly-wrong/666150.md?page=2)