# People who "forget" their babies in the car on a hot day **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 20, 2014, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248 "2014-06-20T22:47:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Hamlet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hamlet/32/2818_2.png) [@Hamlet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamlet)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2014, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248/81 "2014-06-21T19:28:23Z")
> [@Bricker](#): > > Did you read Weingarten’s article? Yes. And? It’s clear that in the cases chery picked and presented in the article that the parents are not intentionally killing their children, and they should not be charged with murder. I would think the proper resolution would be a plea to a lesser charge, a period of probation, and definitely counselling. But it is also amply evident that their negligence led led the horrible death of a child. I suppose we could go around the legalities of negligence v. recklessness and get into a hyper legal analysis of the individual facts in each case and argue when charges are appropriate. But that would do nothing to change my point that the parents in that article, and the other 100,or so who have done this, failed in their responsibilities, which resulted on a horrific, painful, and hellish death for their child. Waving that failure away as a simple accident doesn’t change it. Anymore than a person accidentally running a stop sign and killing a child doesn’t either. ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2014, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248/82 "2014-06-21T19:42:54Z")
> [@Hamlet](#): > > But it is also amply evident that their negligence led led the horrible death of a child. Right. And being human beings we are ALL negligent at one time or another. _Every single one of us_, at one time or another. So, how about the “never can happen to ME!” crowd be a little less arrogant over this? Yes, _even you_ can have a momentary lapse that leads to tragic consequences. Maybe it’s the baby left in the car or the door left unlocked or the item left forgotten on a stove or a moment’s inattention behind the wheel… but get off the attitude that it can NEVER happen to you. It can. I hope it never will, but it _can happen_. To any one of us. Yes, there are things you can do that minimize the likelihood, but because we are human and fallible the risk is never, ever zero. I swear, I sometimes think the crowd that wants to hang folks out to dry over this sort of thing think that by punishing them very severely it will somehow magically keep the rest of us safe from such a lapse. It won’t. ---
**Author:** ![Hamlet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hamlet/32/2818_2.png) [@Hamlet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamlet)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2014, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248/83 "2014-06-21T20:26:03Z")
> [@Broomstick](#): > > Right. And being human beings we are ALL negligent at one time or another. _Every single one of us_, at one time or another. I, and a vast majority of other people, can uncatergorically state that our negligence did not result in the torture and death of an infant child. [Quote=Broomstick] So, how about the “never can happen to ME!” crowd be a little less arrogant over this? [/quote] How about the “Oopsie, my bad” crowd acknowledge the effect of the negligence/recklessness rather than wave it away with a simple “It could happen to anyone!” ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2014, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248/84 "2014-06-21T20:30:54Z")
> [@Hamlet](#): > > I, and a vast majority of other people, can uncatergorically state that our negligence did not result in the torture and death of an infant child. > How about the “Oopsie, my bad” crowd acknowledge the effect of the negligence/recklessness rather than wave it away with a simple “It could happen to anyone!” Hamlet, the two opinions are not mutually exclusive. It _is_ negligence. And it _could_ happen to almost anyone. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2014, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248/85 "2014-06-21T20:48:07Z")
> [@Broomstick](#): > > I swear, I sometimes think the crowd that wants to hang folks out to dry over this sort of thing think that by punishing them very severely it will somehow magically keep the rest of us safe from such a lapse. It won’t. IMO its a selfish defense mechanism of sorts. They just don’t want to admit they are only one brain fart away from killing their kids too. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2014, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248/86 "2014-06-21T21:06:54Z")
I have no kids, but I remember reading the article at the top of the page and being thankful that my niece whom I babysat for many months and drove around places was chatty as all hell, so I never had the chance to forget her. I’ve left too many kettles on the stove to think I have some incredible ability to avoid forgetfulness. Those who think there is no way you could possibly do this are probably more likely to do it. Arrogance leads to negligence, not greater care. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2014, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248/87 "2014-06-21T21:23:20Z")
> [@jsgoddess](#): > > Those who think there is no way you could possibly do this are probably more likely to do it. Arrogance leads to negligence, not greater care. I would think that people would want to be to be extra careful to never say, “I would NEVER do something like that!” If that’s not an invitation for karma to come get you, I don’t know what is. ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2014, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248/88 "2014-06-21T21:27:12Z")
> [@billfish678](#): > > IMO its a selfish defense mechanism of sorts. > > They just don’t want to admit they are only one brain fart away from killing their kids too. This is so it. Then they’d be the first ones, if anything even remotely similar happened to them, to blame it on someone / something else. Sue the car seat manufacturer, go on a viral campaign to bring down their company or babysitter for making them too distracted or lash out at the police for not getting there sooner. It’s pathetic really, to have no empathy in a situation that almost always calls for it. It’s not just the OP (who has had a rare, brief good amount of sense not to return to this bullshit) who is despicable. ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2014, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248/89 "2014-06-21T22:00:46Z")
I agree that the folks here who think they could never do it are really the scary ones. The whole “a child is not an umbrella” argument is ridiculous on its face. No matter how paranoid and aware you are of something, the human brain is imperfect. Nobody who left their child to die in a car thought of them as no more important than an umbrella. That’s the damn point. I too think it’s a weird sort of defense mechanism. “That can never happen to me! I’m better than those terrible/unfortunate/miserable souls.” Pathetic and pitiable, really. It can happen to anyone, and I thank all of you who have been honest in your lapses with parenting that ended up as a “near miss” or could have been one. ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2014, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248/90 "2014-06-21T22:20:57Z")
> [@Labrador\_Deceiver](#): > > Oh, I hope u didn’t give the impression that I think the OP is a troll. She’s just an epic moron. No, not at all…it was this comment: > [@Missy2U](#): > > Not sure I’ve spotted this particular troll before. that I wanted to address. A good troll would come back to add some extra fuel to this stinking fire instead of slinking away with her tail between her legs like a cur. ---
**Author:** ![Hamlet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hamlet/32/2818_2.png) [@Hamlet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamlet)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2014, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248/91 "2014-06-21T22:27:18Z")
> [@drewtwo99](#): > > I agree that the folks here who think they could never do it are really the scary ones. The whole “a child is not an umbrella” argument is ridiculous on its face. No matter how paranoid and aware you are of something, the human brain is imperfect. Nobody who left their child to die in a car thought of them as no more important than an umbrella. That’s the damn point. > > I too think it’s a weird sort of defense mechanism. “That can never happen to me! I’m better than those terrible/unfortunate/miserable souls.” Pathetic and pitiable, really. > > It can happen to anyone, and I thank all of you who have been honest in your lapses with parenting that ended up as a “near miss” or could have been one. In the abstract, it’s amusing how posters who shrug off the death of an infant must resort to calling those who disagree “scary”, “pathetic”, and “pitiable”. Speaks volumes. Of course I also don’t grasp how “it could happen to you” somehow relieves parents of blame when they leave their child to Cook to death in a car. If it does happen to me, you have my permission to heap blame on me and point out my neglect and recklessness for all the world to see. ilieves parents of blame in their failure to not cook their baby alive. ---
**Author:** ![DingoelGringo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9d8465/32.png) [@DingoelGringo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DingoelGringo)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2014, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248/92 "2014-06-21T22:30:14Z")
30 plus years ago I drove home from work with my 2 year old daughter asleep in the back seat, which was usually my wife’s routine. I parked out behind the barn and went into the house as usual and my wife met me inside the door and said, "So you forgot the baby at the baby sitter’s? " No she is out in the car. It was below zero in the Minnesota winter baby wouldn’t have lasted a very long time if her mom hadn’t been there to remind me. ---
**Author:** ![Missy2U](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3bc359/32.png) [@Missy2U](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Missy2U)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2014, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248/93 "2014-06-21T22:38:36Z")
> [@kambuckta](#): > > No, not at all…it was this comment: > that I wanted to address. > > A good troll would come back to add some extra fuel to this stinking fire instead of slinking away with her tail between her legs like a cur. You’re right, **kambuckta** , I mislabeled it. It’s not a troll - it is just hard core stupid. And incidentally, I think you’re right about some brain damage, only that could explain it’s behavior and posts. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2014, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248/94 "2014-06-21T22:49:18Z")
> [@Hamlet](#): > > In the abstract, it’s amusing how posters who shrug off the death of an infant must resort to calling those who disagree “scary”, “pathetic”, and “pitiable”. Speaks volumes. > > Of course I also don’t grasp how “it could happen to you” somehow relieves parents of blame when they leave their child to Cook to death in a car. If it does happen to me, you have my permission to heap blame on me and point out my neglect and recklessness for all the world to see. > ilieves parents of blame in their failure to not cook their baby alive. No one is “shrug(ging) off the death of an infant.” All of us are heartbroken about the stories and fully realize it could, or could have, happened to us. That’s all we’re saying. Go away. ---
**Author:** ![Iggy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iggy/32/3364_2.png) [@Iggy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iggy)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2014, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248/95 "2014-06-21T23:11:44Z")
I was working when we had a 9-1-1 call come in with an incident of a baby left in a hot car and the baby died. I have _never_ before or since heard such raw inconsolable agony. I find it unfathomable that it was anything other than a tragic accident. ---
**Author:** ![Hamlet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hamlet/32/2818_2.png) [@Hamlet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamlet)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2014, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248/96 "2014-06-21T23:18:58Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > No one is “shrug(ging) off the death of an infant.” All of us are heartbroken about the stories and fully realize it could, or could have, happened to us. That’s all we’re saying. > > Go away. I don’t quite get why pointing out that the parents were negligent or reckless in the deaths of the children somehow necessitates my “going away” from a pit thread. I apologize for inserting judgment into a Pit thread. ---
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2014, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248/97 "2014-06-21T23:29:18Z")
> [@Hamlet](#): > > posters who shrug off the death of an infant Kindly point me to the posts where this has happened. Thanks! > [@](#): > > Of course I also don’t grasp how “it could happen to you” somehow relieves parents of blame when they leave their child to Cook to death in a car. Kindly point me to the posts where someone has said this. Thanks! ---
**Author:** ![Hamlet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hamlet/32/2818_2.png) [@Hamlet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamlet)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2014, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248/98 "2014-06-21T23:41:03Z")
> [@andros](#): > > Kindly point me to the posts where this has happened. Thanks! > > Kindly point me to the posts where someone has said this. Thanks! Is hyperbole a foreign concept in the Pit now? I don’t actually think anyone who has posted in this thread doesn’t care that children have been cooked to death or that the parents don’t have at least some responsiblity for their actions that resulted in those deaths. I was using hyperbole to point out I think the negligent/reckless actions of the parents and the horrific results of those actions was being underemphasized in favor of the overemphasis on “it’s just a mistake”. Sorry if the use of a rhetorical device in the Pit threw you off. Just so you know, I also don’t think that that dick Cheney should actually insert his erect penis in his own anal aperture when I say he should fuck off. ---
**Author:** ![Frylock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ce7236/32.png) [@Frylock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frylock)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2014, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248/99 "2014-06-21T23:44:35Z")
> [@Penfeather](#): > > And he’s getting pretty sick of it. Hilarious. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Frylock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ce7236/32.png) [@Frylock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frylock)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2014, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248/100 "2014-06-21T23:47:33Z")
> [@Hamlet](#): > > . If it does happen to me, you have my permission to heap blame on me and point out my neglect and recklessness for all the world to see. Your “permission” is irrelevant. Permission or no, it would almost certainly be wrong for us to say any of that to you, as you would be saying it to yourself more effectively than any of us could, for the remainder of your life, and our saying it would make not even an iota of difference. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-forget-their-babies-in-the-car-on-a-hot-day/691248.md?page=6)