# People who haven't learned a simple skill **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 29, 2004, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374 "2004-07-29T02:47:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2004, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374/21 "2004-07-29T15:45:34Z")
I thought of another one, with the appropriate minor embarrassment attached. I grew up in New Jersey. I’ve lived most of my life here. I went to college in Boston, and after living there for a year, I brought my car up with me and got an apartment. Imagine my confusion the first time I pulled up to a gas station and _nobody came to help me_. I must have sat there for five minutes, just waiting. Finally, my boyfriend pointed out to me that I was expected to pump the gas myself. This was _unheard_ of to me! He was from Pennsylvania, and knew full well how to pump gas. My roommate, in the back seat, was from Maine, and was also capable of tackling the rather daunting task. But they decided it was time for me to learn a valuable lesson in World Knowledge. I overfilled the tank and got gas all over the place. But, to my credit, I learned from my mistake, and can now pump gas like a pro, even at the stations that take away the little latchy thing that lets the pump stay on by itself while you go get a soda. ---
**Author:** ![Trigonal\_Planar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/0ea827/32.png) [@Trigonal\_Planar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trigonal_Planar)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2004, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374/22 "2004-07-29T15:57:24Z")
> [@Johnny L.A.](#): > > This thread makes me want to plug in my rotary phone. Funny you should mention this. We had a rotary phone in our house for many years. It was hilarious watching my friends when they’d come over and have no idea how to use it 😃 Of course, I shouldn’t laugh. I also cannot cook. At all. Its not so much that I’m incompetent (at least I hope not), its just one of those things that I’ve never put any effort into learning. ---
**Author:** ![overlyverbose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9dc877/32.png) [@overlyverbose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/overlyverbose)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2004, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374/23 "2004-07-29T16:29:11Z")
I can make some really complex dishes (a homemade cake from memory with a golden sugar casing, Indian food, French cuisine, etc.), but for the life of me, I cannot make Rice Krispies treats. I just can’t do it. I’ve never been able to figure out how NOT to burn the marshmallows. ---
**Author:** ![minor7flat5](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/minor7flat5/32/258_2.png) [@minor7flat5](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/minor7flat5)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2004, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374/24 "2004-07-29T16:41:49Z")
I am clueless about riding buses as well. I would have to depend on a friend to travel with me and explain the route as well as the procedure for paying the fare and so forth. The funny thing is, my wife has already taught me very well how to travel by bus in Rio, so I would do just fine _there_. (for the record, in Rio, you enter the back of the bus; they have a turnstyle and a fellow who makes change from a plain cash drawer.) I am happy to see that the kids around my house who don’t know how to tie their shoes or read analog clocks are not weird. About those phones – anyone who wants a dial phone should stop by [oldphones.com](http://www.oldphones.com). I ordered a nice black desk model from there a couple of years ago and visitors always find it pleasing. The very same children who don’t appreciate the subtleties of analog time seem to enjoy dialing up their friends on a true dial phone. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2004, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374/25 "2004-07-29T16:44:09Z")
> [@panache45](#): > > I recently spent 2 days in Niagara Falls (Canadian side), and I encountered a family (man, woman, teenager) who didn’t know how to use an elevator. They kept hitting the button for the floor they were on, rather than the one they wanted to go to. They couldn’t understand why the door kept opening, every time they pressed the button. I actually had to explain it to them. They spoke midwest-U.S. English, didn’t appear to have grown up in some back woods, but somehow missed this particular skill. I have one quite similar to that; every now and again, I’ll be using a lift(elevator) to descend from the middle floor of a department store, someone else will have pressed the ‘down’ button, we’ll get into the lift and I’ll press the ground floor button and they will press a button for a floor _above_. The lift will proceed downwards, then a conversation will begin: **Them:** You made it go down! I wanted to go up! **Me:** But you pressed the ‘down’ button outside… **Them:** Yes, because I wanted the lift to come ‘down’, so that I could get in. **Me:** Either of the buttons calls the lift; you’re supposed to press the ‘up’ button if you want to call the lift, then go up… **Them:** But I wanted the lift to come down to me… **Me:** It would do that anyway; either of the buttons calls the lift; they are to tell the system which way you want to go _after you get in_, that’s why we’re going _down_ now, because you called the lift with the ‘down’ button. \*\*Them: \*\* \ ---
**Author:** ![dwc1970](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a183cd/32.png) [@dwc1970](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dwc1970)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2004, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374/26 "2004-07-29T16:58:27Z")
At age 34 I still have a hard time remembering how to lace up a pair of shoes. I’m glad I am not the only one in the world who has this problem. Other things I would not know how to do if confronted with such tasks: Change a tire Check my car’s oil Iron clothing Washes dishes by hand (I leave spots on mine, I need an automatic dishwasher) I also can’t cook worth a damn, either. ---
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2004, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374/27 "2004-07-29T17:17:41Z")
All I know is I wish they would put a friggen practice ATM next to the real ones. And you wouldn’t be allowed to use a real one until you successfully used the practice one. ---
**Author:** ![Ghanima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Ghanima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ghanima)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2004, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374/28 "2004-07-29T17:18:23Z")
At various times while I was in college, I have taught people how to: make a grilled cheese sandwich iron clothes make a bed do laundry chop an onion And this was Berkeley, where people are supposed to be _smart_. Although maybe they could be those absent-minded genius types. But nothing here so far has beaten the OP. That is truly stoooopid! If I was in the elevator, I’d be looking for the hidden cameras, convinced that it was all an elaborate joke. > [@](#): > > \ I think I’ve found a new sig! ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2004, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374/29 "2004-07-29T17:25:38Z")
My company once had an intern who had been photo editor of her college newspaper. My boss told her to take a camera with her to an event and take photos. She took six rolls with her. When we gopt the film back, there was not one single usable photo. Everything was over- or underexposed, out of focus, photos of the top of the subject’s head or soles of their shoes, etc. She left left the back of the camera open with one roll. My boss said “I thought you were the photo editor of your newspaper?” “I was.” she cried. “The staff took photos, and I picked out which ones to use.” ---
**Author:** ![congodwarf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e36b37/32.png) [@congodwarf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/congodwarf)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2004, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374/30 "2004-07-29T17:30:28Z")
My 27 year old sister can’t tell time. My 26 year old sister needs 2 bunny ears to tie her shoes. Neither of them has any clue how to use a computer. My mother starts fires trying to boil water. I have no problem with these skills. However, the 3 of them are very creative. My mother is a musician. My oldest sister is a halfway decent artist. My middle sister draws and writes very well. I can’t do any of these. I’d give up any of my simple skills for one of their creative ones. ---
**Author:** ![Trigonal\_Planar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/0ea827/32.png) [@Trigonal\_Planar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trigonal_Planar)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2004, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374/31 "2004-07-29T17:33:20Z")
> [@kunilou](#): > > My boss said “I thought you were the photo editor of your newspaper?” > > “I was.” she cried. “The staff took photos, and I picked out which ones to use.” This sounds like the punch line to one of those non-sequitor story type jokes. ---
**Author:** ![GraphicsGal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e0b2c6/32.png) [@GraphicsGal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GraphicsGal)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2004, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374/32 "2004-07-29T17:39:49Z")
I know a gal who never knew you are supposed to dilute Campbell’s Condensed Chicken Noodle Soup. This was years ago when there was nothing BUT condensed soup on the store shelves. I was dumbfounded. ---
**Author:** ![Terminus\_Est](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terminus_est/32/3087_2.png) [@Terminus\_Est](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terminus_Est)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2004, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374/33 "2004-07-29T17:40:10Z")
> [@kunilou](#): > > My boss said “I thought you were the photo editor of your newspaper?” > > “I was.” she cried. “The staff took photos, and I picked out which ones to use.” In all fairness, this is exactly what a photo editor is supposed to do. ---
**Author:** ![TwoTrouts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a9adbd/32.png) [@TwoTrouts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwoTrouts)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2004, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374/34 "2004-07-29T17:43:22Z")
I once had a warehouse worker get upset and quit on me when told that he had to participate in the annual inventory. I learned later that he couldn’t count past twelve and could barely read. I was stunned! I knew he had dropped out of school, but it must have been elementary school! ---
**Author:** ![Roadfood](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9fc348/32.png) [@Roadfood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roadfood)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2004, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374/35 "2004-07-29T17:45:53Z")
> [@overlyverbose](#): > > I can make some really complex dishes (a homemade cake from memory with a golden sugar casing, Indian food, French cuisine, etc.), but for the life of me, I cannot make Rice Krispies treats. I just can’t do it. I’ve never been able to figure out how NOT to burn the marshmallows. In a word: patience. You must leave the stove on a setting that’s between “Low” and “Medium” ( **never** turn it above “Medium”!) and keep stirring. Constantly stirring. It also helps tremendously if you use miniature marshmellows rather than the large variety. Oh, and you did put the required butter in the pan and get that all melted **before** putting the marshmellows in the pan, right? Then when you add the marshmellows, try to get all of them covered with the melted butter (this not only helps the marshmellows begin to melt, but helps you to know that you are thoroughly stirring the marshmellows). Lastly, as soon as the last lump is gone from the melted marshmellows, remove the pan from the stove and immediately add the Rice Krispies, in stages, i.e. add maybe a sixth of the total, stir to get the mixture even, add another sixth, stir to get everything all even, etc. Trust me, I make the best Rice Krispie Treats on the west coast. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Roadfood](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9fc348/32.png) [@Roadfood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roadfood)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2004, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374/36 "2004-07-29T17:55:42Z")
> [@Draelin](#): > > Imagine my confusion the first time I pulled up to a gas station and _nobody came to help me_. I must have sat there for five minutes, just waiting. > > Finally, my boyfriend pointed out to me that I was expected to pump the gas myself. So you’re saying that your boyfriend and the person in the backseat sat there in silence for five minutes before it dawned on them to tell you that you were supposed to pump the gas yourself? Seems like a lack of some kind of skill on their part… ---
**Author:** ![DeadlyAccurate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ac91a4/32.png) [@DeadlyAccurate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeadlyAccurate)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2004, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374/37 "2004-07-29T17:55:50Z")
> [@Roadfood](#): > > In a word: patience. You must leave the stove on a setting that’s between “Low” and “Medium” ( **never** turn it above “Medium”!) and keep stirring. Constantly stirring. It also helps tremendously if you use miniature marshmellows rather than the large variety. Oh, and you did put the required butter in the pan and get that all melted **before** putting the marshmellows in the pan, right? Then when you add the marshmellows, try to get all of them covered with the melted butter (this not only helps the marshmellows begin to melt, but helps you to know that you are thoroughly stirring the marshmellows). Lastly, as soon as the last lump is gone from the melted marshmellows, remove the pan from the stove and immediately add the Rice Krispies, in stages, i.e. add maybe a sixth of the total, stir to get the mixture even, add another sixth, stir to get everything all even, etc. > > Trust me, I make the best Rice Krispie Treats on the west coast. 😃 Or you can just microwave the darn things. I don’t think I’ve ever made them on a stovetop. ---
**Author:** ![cher3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@cher3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cher3)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2004, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374/38 "2004-07-29T17:59:37Z")
> [@overlyverbose](#): > > I can make some really complex dishes (a homemade cake from memory with a golden sugar casing, Indian food, French cuisine, etc.), but for the life of me, I cannot make Rice Krispies treats. I just can’t do it. I’ve never been able to figure out how NOT to burn the marshmallows. I have the same issues with Jello. It will never set, especially if I’ve put anything in it. I don’t even like Jello, so the issue doesn’t come up very often. One time, though, we were staying in the home of friend and she asked me to make some Jello for her. She has some serious food issues and was on a crazy self-invented diet that involved eating nothing but jello and raw vegetables during the day. So she asked me to make her daily pan of jello and cukes one afternoon when she was busy, and I managed to screw it up somehow. It was pretty embarassing, since I have some reputation as a cook. ---
**Author:** ![congodwarf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e36b37/32.png) [@congodwarf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/congodwarf)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2004, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374/39 "2004-07-29T18:07:47Z")
> [@DeadlyAccurate](#): > > Or you can just microwave the darn things. I don’t think I’ve ever made them on a stovetop. Or you could make them with marshmallow fluff. And just for the record, I make the best rice krispie treats on the East Coast! 😃 no, I don’t use Fluff. ---
**Author:** ![Absolute](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b2d939/32.png) [@Absolute](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Absolute)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2004, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374/40 "2004-07-29T18:21:33Z")
> [@congodwarf](#): > > My 27 year old sister can’t tell time. My 26 year old sister needs 2 bunny ears to tie her shoes. I’m 17 and I had no idea that there was another way to tie shoes. Someone enlighten me, please. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-havent-learned-a-simple-skill/257374.md?page=3)