# People who try to hide behind "sarcasm" or "satire" **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 3, 2015, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-try-to-hide-behind-sarcasm-or-satire/724101 "2015-07-03T02:06:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Boo\_Boo\_Foo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@Boo\_Boo\_Foo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boo_Boo_Foo)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2015, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-try-to-hide-behind-sarcasm-or-satire/724101/21 "2015-07-04T05:54:36Z")
I’m pretty sure it was George Bernard Shaw who famously noted we can assume we all share the same taste - except for humour! ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2015, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-try-to-hide-behind-sarcasm-or-satire/724101/22 "2015-07-04T13:27:02Z")
> [@Frylock](#): > > That doesn’t seem like a justified conclusion to draw. Razzing between people who are familiar with each other is SOP in many communities. Agreed. > [@Velocity](#): > > For clarification, this thread isn’t about sarcasm that hurts people’s feelings. It’s about someone who knowingly and willfully says hurtful things that are meant 100% genuinely (in other words, non-sarcastically,) but then, when confronted, claims “sarcasm.” Cancel your XM radio subscription? ---
**Author:** ![Lakai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9de0a6/32.png) [@Lakai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lakai)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2015, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-try-to-hide-behind-sarcasm-or-satire/724101/23 "2015-07-04T14:20:47Z")
> [@jz78817](#): > > stop talking to them. They don’t realize the difference between “being sarcastic” and “being an asshole.” And you probably won’t be able to make them see the difference. One more vote for this solution. There is no reason to waste time trying to convince them they were wrong. Once enough people ignore them, they’ll figure it out. ---
**Author:** ![Taber](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ac91a4/32.png) [@Taber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taber)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2015, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-try-to-hide-behind-sarcasm-or-satire/724101/24 "2015-07-04T19:22:09Z")
The worst version of this is when someone uses sarcasm to make a point, but if anyone argues against that point “they don’t know what sarcasm is” A: “I’m a big dumb poopy-head. I think \ because \” B: "hey, \ isn’t so bad, I think it for \, and I’m not a poopy-head A: “can’t you recognize sarcasm?” ---
**Author:** ![OffByOne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/45deac/32.png) [@OffByOne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OffByOne)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2015, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-try-to-hide-behind-sarcasm-or-satire/724101/25 "2015-07-08T19:33:11Z")
> [@Becky2844](#): > > Man, I must thrive on confrontation because it bothers me less and less. > > If it were my boss I’d speak to him or her privately, saying something like, “I know you’re clever because you (blah blah) but when you say \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ it throws people off, makes them defensive and actually hurts their feelings. Since you seem to be (insert ass-kissing BS) I thought you’d want to know that it’s hindering your goals.” > > If it was a coworker I’d say, “You might think you’re being funny but talk to me like that again and I’ll kick your ass.” In front of everybody. And then say, “Just kidding! No, I’m not. No, I kid. But I meant it.” ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2015, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-try-to-hide-behind-sarcasm-or-satire/724101/26 "2015-07-08T19:48:58Z")
> [@ThelmaLou](#): > > This. > > When it happens, give the blank stare. Do not listen to excuses or lame “can’t you take a joke” BS. Minimize contact in the future, but if you have to interact (like at work) do not react to the sarcasm. And don’t explain your POV as that invites further BS from them. > > I like bitter humor, black humor, and even sarcasm in measured doses when it is intelligent and witty. But the OP asked about people who hide behind it and overuse it. I say do not reinforce them by reacting or even engaging. They need an audience. Don’t be it. Yes, this. People who don’t understand the right place to use sarcasm and use it with everyone are assholes, no matter what you say. And you never know what people are sensitive about and if they have legitimate grievances or not. I work in a field that deals with an extremely sensitive topic - dead and sick babies. I am extremely careful about my sarcasm and never use it unless I know for a fact the other person is ok with it, and even then I make sure they know I’m being sarcastic. And I don’t mean joking about babies. I mean any kind of sarcasm at all. I had a coworker who was sarcastic to everything you said. I love her, she’s one of my dearest friends at this point, but she alienated a lot of people because they don’t get her. ---
**Author:** ![AnaMen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dfb087/32.png) [@AnaMen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AnaMen)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-try-to-hide-behind-sarcasm-or-satire/724101/27 "2015-07-09T00:42:23Z")
I’d pretend that maybe I don’t understand what sarcasm is, since what they are doing is not it, and make them explain it to me over and over. Then I’d insult them whenever I felt like it and ask if I was doing it right. ---
**Author:** ![HeXen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@HeXen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeXen)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-try-to-hide-behind-sarcasm-or-satire/724101/28 "2015-07-09T00:51:32Z")
Like on the show Roseanne, the daughter that says nothing without sarcasm? I don’t talk to people like that at all and treat them like shit when the opportunity arises. Witty sarcasm is fine, I’m cool with dark humor …etc but people that like to rub something in with sarcastic remarks or to be condescending then I have no tolerance. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-try-to-hide-behind-sarcasm-or-satire/724101/29 "2015-07-09T01:32:23Z")
Like **Leo Krupe** , I used to be that guy. Of course, I wasn’t _trying_ to be obnoxious, just funny. Go ahead and call them on it. And when they say you don’t understand sarcasm, just say, “Oh. You didn’t really mean it?,” with a tone of total surprise. Then, every time they say ANYTHING just reply, “I get it, you don’t REALLY mean that.” Nothing annoys someone who’s obnoxious more than not having his obnoxiousness taken seriously. ---
**Author:** ![Stratocaster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stratocaster/32/16393_2.png) [@Stratocaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stratocaster)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-try-to-hide-behind-sarcasm-or-satire/724101/30 "2015-07-09T02:09:28Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > For clarification, this thread isn’t about sarcasm that hurts people’s feelings. It’s about someone who knowingly and willfully says hurtful things that are meant 100% genuinely (in other words, non-sarcastically,) but then, when confronted, claims “sarcasm.” Can you give an example? Seems like quite a non sequitur, so the obvious response would be, “Um, no, that’s not sarcasm.” So I may be misunderstanding. Plus much of the advice you’re receiving seems to be missing your clarification–I.e., it deals with examples of actual sarcastic assholes. An example from you might help. ---
**Author:** ![BeeGee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b5a626/32.png) [@BeeGee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BeeGee)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 6:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-try-to-hide-behind-sarcasm-or-satire/724101/31 "2015-07-09T06:25:38Z")
“Yes, I understand you’re being sarcastic. I’m not too clear on why you’re being an asshole as well.” When it comes right down to it, sarcasm, ironicism, and solipsism are all ways of communicating. They do not, however, give you a pass if you’re being deliberately insulting. Sometimes, I admit it; I insult people. Like the guy who was blocking a driveway for no good reason. Or the person who made fun of people with Asian eyes. Or the person who was making racist comments. I decided to pull out my sharp error knives and go to town. I was sarcastic and also an asshole and I admit it. The idea that there’s some sort of free pass for admitting you’re being mean about something isn’t really cutting any ice with me. ---
**Author:** ![Kaio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c68b51/32.png) [@Kaio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kaio)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-try-to-hide-behind-sarcasm-or-satire/724101/32 "2015-07-09T19:19:12Z")
“I don’t know who you think you’re fooling, but it’s not me or anyone else in this room. Own your shit. The only thing worse than an asshole is a spineless asshole.” Then I’d walk away and never allow them into my life again. Of course this doesn’t work if you’re forced to deal with them, like at your job. In which case what I’d say would be largely the same as above, with less swearing as needed for the office culture. And I would refuse to interact with them for any reason not directly related to tasks I needed to accomplish. If they tried to draw me in again I’d just tell them “You’re still not fooling anyone and I’m not going to participate in this. I’m here for [task], provide me what I asked for or I will leave and will be sure to let Boss know why our progress is so slow.” ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2015, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-try-to-hide-behind-sarcasm-or-satire/724101/33 "2015-07-09T19:30:50Z")
Are we talking about sarcasm and satire, or “sarcasm” and “satire”? I think the latter cancel themselves out. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/people-who-try-to-hide-behind-sarcasm-or-satire/724101.md?page=1)