# Permasingular dating service \[tm\] **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 10, 2005, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912 "2005-03-10T22:17:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![ArrMatey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/arrmatey/32/3522_2.png) [@ArrMatey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ArrMatey)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2005, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912/1 "2005-03-10T22:17:20Z")
Hey all. Today I got the news, in passing, that yet another person who broke my heart is in the throres of incredible bliss and thinking of nuptuals. After considering this for some time, I realized that this now makes 4 out of the last 5 that have stomped on me, then found their true love / soul mate / whatever. Wishing bliss on the collective, I’ve decided to open myself up. This track record needs to be shared! All you need to do is get me interrested in you, then break up with me mesilly, and voila! 80% success rate that the next guy / girl will be ‘the one’! And I don’t even charge much, being the kind of guy that pays for dates. (And boy, do I pay). So, there you go! Want matrimony, or at least long-term romantic hapiness? All you need to do is rip my heart out! Come one, come all! ---
**Author:** ![Mithril](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mithril/32/3517_2.png) [@Mithril](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mithril)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2005, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912/2 "2005-03-10T22:56:38Z")
You’re looking at it all wrong. Your exes have realized that they will never do as well as you again, so they settle for the next thing that comes along. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2005, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912/3 "2005-03-10T23:29:05Z")
It’s that pirate thing. Yeh, you can sweep the ladies off their feet sure enough. Ravish and plunder their booty for a while. But that smell eventually overpowers the best of them. 😛 RUM! Where be more rum!!! Yo-Ho me mate!!! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Monstre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@Monstre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monstre)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2005, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912/4 "2005-03-10T23:51:26Z")
> [@ArrMatey!](#): > > And I don’t even charge much, **being the kind of guy that pays for dates**. My first thought was “well, there’s the problem!” (For instance, it didn’t help Hugh Grant find his soulmate…) Then I realized you probably meant that you pick up the tab when you’re on a date… 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Scribble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scribble/32/3317_2.png) [@Scribble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scribble)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2005, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912/5 "2005-03-11T00:05:56Z")
> [@ArrMatey!](#): > > Hey all. > > Today I got the news, in passing, that yet another person who broke my heart is in the throres of incredible bliss and thinking of nuptuals. Oh, **ArrMatey**. I feel your pain. You’re not the only one this has happened to. I just found out that[this guy](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=177422) is now engaged. And he’s graduating with his PhD, while I’m still muddling along in my master’s, trying to figure out how to make this whole getting-my-degree-thing as least painful as possible. So I feel like, not only is he getting married, but academically and professionally, he’s doing better than me, too. Yeah, it sucks. ---
**Author:** ![davmilasav](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9bcb4/32.png) [@davmilasav](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davmilasav)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2005, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912/6 "2005-03-11T03:46:16Z")
Two of my exes later came out. One was gay, the other bi. I \*\*AM \*\*The Woman With No Gaydar! ---
**Author:** ![Askance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askance/32/8281_2.png) [@Askance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askance)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2005, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912/7 "2005-03-11T04:28:13Z")
> [@davmilasav](#): > > Two of my exes later came out. One was gay, the other bi. I \*\*AM \*\*The Woman With No Gaydar! Don’t be so hard on yourself, I’m sure they weren’t gay when you first went out with them. There, feel better now? ---
**Author:** ![Shabadu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/46a35a/32.png) [@Shabadu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shabadu)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2005, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912/8 "2005-03-11T05:04:23Z")
> [@davmilasav](#): > > Two of my exes later came out. One was gay, the other bi. I \*\*AM \*\*The Woman With No Gaydar! I feel your pain. My ex broke up with me when he came out, and now he is happily married to his new husband (in Massachusetts). It just feels like a double blow. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2005, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912/9 "2005-03-11T13:09:18Z")
It could be worse. At least you’ve _had_ a Close Emotional Relationship with a Significant Other. How did it end up that two of my best friends are _grandparents_ while I’m still trying to get more than one date in a row with the samw woman…? ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2005, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912/10 "2005-03-11T17:09:50Z")
But… I don’t want to be the one who stomps on your heart! I’ve had rather enough of that happening to ME, so I know how it feels. ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2005, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912/11 "2005-03-11T17:23:40Z")
I doubt it’ll make you feel any better, but when I was in high school it seemed like every girl I dated was a sweetheart while I was dating them, only to turn into raging sluts after we broke up. I was always wondering what it was I did that destroyed their sweetness, or at least why they couldn’t have been slutty with me so I could at least have gotten some. ---
**Author:** ![SusanStoHelit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/7ab992/32.png) [@SusanStoHelit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SusanStoHelit)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2005, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912/12 "2005-03-11T17:55:45Z")
> [@Lord Ashtar](#): > > I doubt it’ll make you feel any better, but when I was in high school it seemed like every girl I dated was a sweetheart while I was dating them, only to turn into raging sluts after we broke up. I was always wondering what it was I did that destroyed their sweetness, or at least why they couldn’t have been slutty with me so I could at least have gotten some. Wait, since when is slut the antonym of sweetheart? [sub]note: I’m not stalking you or picking fights, I swear. You’re just lucky.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![little\_bit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/258eb7/32.png) [@little\_bit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/little_bit)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2005, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912/13 "2005-03-11T17:59:14Z")
If it makes you feel any better… My curse is that if we date for more than 6 months, after we break up (who does the breaking is not important) you will return to your previous SO & get married. There is no guarantee it will last, just that you will marry them. The current statistical evidence is 3 of the four are divorced, and 2 of the 4 have children (1 of the 2 is the currently married one). So if anyone wants to marry their ex, step right up. You only have to date me until the end of summer. ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2005, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912/14 "2005-03-11T18:02:41Z")
> [@SusanStoHelit](#): > > Wait, since when is slut the antonym of sweetheart? > > [sub]note: I’m not stalking you or picking fights, I swear. You’re just lucky.[/sub] It was the closest I could come up with. Out of curiousity, what would you use as an antonym for slut? Yay! Lucky me! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![SusanStoHelit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/7ab992/32.png) [@SusanStoHelit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SusanStoHelit)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2005, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912/15 "2005-03-11T18:11:18Z")
> [@Lord Ashtar](#): > > It was the closest I could come up with. Out of curiousity, what would you use as an antonym for slut? Virginal, innocent, pure, or chaste would work. I just get tired of the whole “a slut is a woman who has sex with everyone but me” attitude. ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2005, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912/16 "2005-03-11T18:13:09Z")
> [@Lord Ashtar](#): > > It was the closest I could come up with. Out of curiousity, what would you use as an antonym for slut? Um … Prude? Priss? The possibilities boggle. If you want it even _easier_, all you have to do in order to get married to a wonderful person is be my friend. Odds are, I’ll even _introduce_ you to your future spouse. And I’m a fun third wheel, an obliging chauffeur, and an obedient bridesmaid (as long as I like the dress). ---
**Author:** ![ArrMatey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/arrmatey/32/3522_2.png) [@ArrMatey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ArrMatey)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2005, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912/17 "2005-03-11T18:52:00Z")
_flirts briefly with **Draelin** , then gets out the slide rule and calculator to re-adjust the equations on all this_ So how _you_ doin’? ---
**Author:** ![Telperien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2005, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912/18 "2005-03-11T22:43:25Z")
I could get in on this. My problem is not that I drive people back to their exes (although that has happened twice) but that most of the time, I am so subtle and sneaky that no one knows I’m interested. This has not been the recipe for success that one might think. ---
**Author:** ![PopCultureReference\_11one](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e9c0ed/32.png) [@PopCultureReference\_11one](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PopCultureReference_11one)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2005, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912/19 "2005-03-11T23:52:11Z")
With my last two breakups (well not even real breakups, but ends to psuedo-relationships), both the girls started gaining weight afterwards. I like to think that it’s because of me. Even if it isn’t, it still works out because it means I was able to hit the eject button before they blew up (hahaha…). Yeah I’m a shallow jerk. I’m sorry. Also one of them became horribly promiscuous as well. I think she was trying to make me jealous but just ended up making me lose respect for her. ---
**Author:** ![Iceland\_Blue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/4bbf92/32.png) [@Iceland\_Blue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iceland_Blue)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2005, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912/20 "2005-03-12T00:28:39Z")
> [@Sunspace](#): > > It could be worse. At least you’ve _had_ a Close Emotional Relationship with a Significant Other. > > How did it end up that two of my best friends are _grandparents_ while I’m still trying to get more than one date in a row with the samw woman…? I know how that feels.I’ve now got several schoolfriends who are parents whilst I’m still floating around waiting for my first date ☹ And the girl I first kissed has now got a bloke and two kids of her own and she’s only a year older than me… Maybe we could set up a Doper Lonely Hearts Thread if anyone’s interested?I would do one myself but it would probably go pearshaped [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/permasingular-dating-service-tm/293912.md?page=2)