# pH for dummies **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 22, 2016, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702 "2016-11-22T00:26:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2016, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702/1 "2016-11-22T00:26:45Z")
An awful lot of woo depends on the idea that what we eat and drink makes our bodies acid or alkaline, that a cornucopia of diseases stems from improper acid-base balance, and that through dietary manipulation and supplements we can make our bodies alkaline and thus attain great health, thereby thwarting Big Pharma and the Medical Establishment. For many, pH is a mysterious and forbidding subject. Thankfully, there is a simple chart that explains it. [Enjoy!](https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10209557788654972&set=gm.852107414929240&type=3&theater) ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2016, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702/2 "2016-11-22T00:40:53Z")
Did you know that dihydrogen mono-oxide has a higher pH than sulfuric acid? And the government allows it to be used in foods? :eek: ---
**Author:** ![snfaulkner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snfaulkner/32/433_2.png) [@snfaulkner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snfaulkner)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2016, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702/3 "2016-11-22T00:50:40Z")
AH Dammit! All of my precious bodily fluids have been sapped and impurified again. ---
**Author:** ![asterion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/4da419/32.png) [@asterion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/asterion)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2016, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702/4 "2016-11-22T04:07:09Z")
I never want to have to explain Lewis acids and bases to these people. ---
**Author:** ![Canadjun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/76d3ee/32.png) [@Canadjun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Canadjun)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2016, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702/5 "2016-11-22T14:57:31Z")
> [@asterion](#): > > I never want to have to explain Lewis acids and bases to these people. Do they make you any less dead? ---
**Author:** ![MonkeyMensch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@MonkeyMensch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MonkeyMensch)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2016, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702/6 "2016-11-22T18:32:26Z")
Hey wait a minute! Nobody with a total body pH of 8.0 or above has ever contracted cancer! It’s a fact! ---
**Author:** ![friedo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2016, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702/7 "2016-11-22T20:21:23Z")
That reminds me a lot of [this chart](http://lolsnaps.com/upload_pic/FahrenheitVsCelsiusVsKelvin-67227.jpg) demonstrating why Fahrenheit is better than Celsius. ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2016, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702/8 "2016-11-22T20:40:58Z")
Pffft, that’s obviously nonsense. Are you saying Darwin was wrong when he invented Deoxyribonucleic Acid? The clue’s in the name! Also, quantum epigenetics. ---
**Author:** ![SantaMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/da6949/32.png) [@SantaMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SantaMan)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2016, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702/9 "2016-11-23T00:26:22Z")
Curiously, I had uric kidney stones, which, like gout, is related to the acidity of the blood. My Urologist put me on baking soda to cause the crystals to dissolve. But that is something different, altogether. (All together) “But that is something different” ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2016, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702/10 "2016-11-23T02:36:09Z")
My college freshman chemistry course covered pH in depth. The professor explained it thus: “Many people think that pH stands for “power of hydrogen”, but it doesn’t. The “P” stands for ‘puissance’, which is french for power”. Thanks, Dr. Robinson! ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2016, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702/11 "2016-11-23T02:40:22Z")
What a puissant. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2016, 4:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702/12 "2016-11-23T04:34:24Z")
Thankfully, this particular bit of woo is on the wane. It’s dying a hard death, but I see it less and less in the alt med circles I frequent. Now it’s all CBD oil, all the time. :smack: (And essential oils, and coconut oil. Oily bunch.) ---
**Author:** ![Rysto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecccb3/32.png) [@Rysto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysto)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2016, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702/13 "2016-11-23T04:43:55Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > Now it’s all CBD oil, all the time. :smack: > > (And essential oils, and coconut oil. Oily bunch.) Try to convince them that this is just a conspiracy run by Big Oil. It’ll probably die off fast. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![asterion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/4da419/32.png) [@asterion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/asterion)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2016, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702/14 "2016-11-23T13:34:34Z")
> [@Canadjun](#): > > Do they make you any less dead? Considering what a number of Lewis acids and bases are, probably more dead. Though my point was that a Lewis acid/base is a much less intuitive thing than the Arrhenius or Bronsted-Lowry definitions. I can’t believe people spend extra money on “high pH” water. The first thing the body does is buffer it all out anyway. Though every time I see the latest woo I think that I was right that the company I used to work for should get out of real pharma and into woo. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2016, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702/15 "2016-11-23T14:55:09Z")
> [@asterion](#): > > I can’t believe people spend extra money on “high pH” water. The first thing the body does is buffer it all out anyway. Well, that’s the (completely wrong) theory. That if your body has to send acids out to buffer the alkaline water, then your body will be less acid overall. It makes a weird kind of sense, if you don’t _at all_ understand how it works. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2016, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702/16 "2016-11-23T14:58:21Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > Thankfully, this particular bit of woo is on the wane. It’s dying a hard death, but I see it less and less in the alt med circles I frequent. We must be traveling in different woo circles, because it remains extremely common in my experience, right up there with various forms of “detox”. One of my interests is cancer quackery, which in many cases involves dietary manipulations that are supposed to [“alkalinize” the body](http://www.collective-evolution.com/2016/10/06/can-an-alkaline-diet-successfully-treat-cancer-here-are-some-signs-your-body-is-too-acidic-what-to-do-about-it/) to kill cancer cells. Mainstream wooists like [the Food Babe](http://foodbabe.com/2015/11/30/how-a-food-babe-wakes-up-come-on-into-my-home/) promulgate acid-base nonsense as well. One positive sign - a major figure in the alkaline woo industry, Dr. Robert O. Young (who made huge sums of money from credulous patients) [got busted](http://scienceblogs.com/insolence/2014/01/27/cancer-quack-robert-o-young-is-arrested-and-arraigned-but-will-he-be-convicted/) for his activities. ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2016, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702/17 "2016-11-23T20:39:40Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > Now it’s all CBD oil, all the time. :smack: Hey! What’s wrong with Canadian Bacon Duck oil? I’m frying up my turkey in it tomorrow! ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2016, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702/18 "2016-11-23T21:07:16Z")
The main problem I have with the pH theory of health is that it does not adequately take into account which [direction your head is oriented when you sleep](http://www.the-open-mind.com/how-the-direction-you-sleep-affects-you-1/)or what diet best suits your [blood genotype](http://www.dadamo.com/txt/index.pl?1039). Without those factors considered it’s nothing more than pseudo-science. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2016, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702/19 "2016-11-23T22:14:13Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > We must be traveling in different woo circles, because it remains extremely common in my experience, right up there with various forms of “detox”. Good. Hopefully that means I’m educating my circles out of it. That feels nice. ---
**Author:** ![lazybratsche](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ba8739/32.png) [@lazybratsche](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lazybratsche)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2016, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702/20 "2016-11-23T22:32:43Z")
> [@Cardigan](#): > > The main problem I have with the pH theory of health is that it does not adequately take into account which [direction your head is oriented when you sleep](http://www.the-open-mind.com/how-the-direction-you-sleep-affects-you-1/)or what diet best suits your [blood genotype](http://www.dadamo.com/txt/index.pl?1039). Without those factors considered it’s nothing more than pseudo-science. Fuck me, I think I sprained my brain on that second link. It uses enough nearly real science words that I can’t just laugh it off like I can the first link. Sleepy brain compasses? Hah! Blood GenoType secretion regulation lectin agglutination? Part of my brain immediately starts cataloging the errors, attempts to formulate an argument, and then shouts “DOES NOT COMPUTE” while exploding in a shower of sparks. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ph-for-dummies/772702.md?page=2)