# Philly Police warn public of perv on the loose... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 15, 2014, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874 "2014-01-15T15:08:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2014, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874/41 "2014-01-15T21:17:59Z")
If I go on a stroll with her, will we be walking abreast? ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Tildrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e95f7d/32.png) [@Tom\_Tildrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Tildrum)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2014, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874/42 "2014-01-15T21:22:35Z")
“Cheezit, the cops!” ---
**Author:** ![wedgehed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8edcca/32.png) [@wedgehed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wedgehed)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2014, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874/43 "2014-01-15T21:31:50Z")
Pre-sliced Swiss? I remember when men made their own dick cheese! ---
**Author:** ![Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slow_moving_vehicle/32/291_2.png) [@Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slow_Moving_Vehicle)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2014, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874/44 "2014-01-15T22:10:13Z")
Fat, female-free Philly fellow fetishistically frotts fromage? Freaky. Penn police possess powerful “pusillanimous perv” patrol? Priceless! ---
**Author:** ![FightMyIgnorance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/71e660/32.png) [@FightMyIgnorance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FightMyIgnorance)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2014, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874/45 "2014-01-15T22:17:24Z")
Thread title: Philly Police warn public of perv on the loose… Latest post by: Slow Moving Vehicle Hmmm… 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slow_moving_vehicle/32/291_2.png) [@Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slow_Moving_Vehicle)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2014, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874/46 "2014-01-15T22:28:10Z")
> [@FightMyIgnorance](#): > > Thread title: Philly Police warn public of perv on the loose… > Latest post by: Slow Moving Vehicle > > Hmmm… 😉 That wasn’t my car, I was never there, it was two other dudes and it never happened, anyway. I don’t even _own_ a fondue pot. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2014, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874/47 "2014-01-15T22:33:40Z")
This guy sounds dangerous. He might be a feta-phile. ---
**Author:** ![aceplace57](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aceplace57/32/3500_2.png) [@aceplace57](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aceplace57)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2014, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874/48 "2014-01-15T22:39:42Z")
Now we know why there’s a shortage of Velveeta. 😉 > **[Not a stunt: Kraft confirms Velveeta shortage](https://www.nbcnews.com/business/not-stunt-velveeta-confirms-shortage-2D11887843)** ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2014, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874/49 "2014-01-15T23:09:19Z")
He’ll be caught soon. I hear they have Co-Jack on the case. mmm ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2014, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874/50 "2014-01-15T23:14:29Z")
This pub, this very pub we’re just sitting in. I built it, with me own hands! But do they call me the Pubmaker? Naa! See the wall over there, that protects our town? I built it, with me own hands! But do they call me the Wallmaker? And the bridge, you know, that crosses our river, I built it, with me own hands! But do they call me the Bridgemaker? But I tell ya, man! YOU FUCK ONE GOAT CHEESE! ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2014, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874/51 "2014-01-15T23:15:58Z")
In Philadelphia the locals know to order their perverts “with”. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2014, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874/52 "2014-01-16T02:34:24Z")
What a muenster! But his case is being processed. ---
**Author:** ![simster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/simster/32/1047_2.png) [@simster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/simster)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2014, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874/53 "2014-01-16T05:14:44Z")
> [@Loach](#): > > This guy sounds dangerous. He might be a feta-phile. /thread ---
**Author:** ![wedgehed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8edcca/32.png) [@wedgehed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wedgehed)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2014, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874/54 "2014-01-16T05:30:46Z")
The suspect is an overweight white guy? Has anyone determined the whereabouts of Rush Limburger? ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2014, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874/55 "2014-01-16T05:40:29Z")
He should just return to his little cottage. ---
**Author:** ![Los\_Anconfused](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/aca169/32.png) [@Los\_Anconfused](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Los_Anconfused)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2014, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874/56 "2014-01-16T20:12:59Z")
**Looks like the Cheese Pervert bleu his cover…** \*Police say they have arrested the so-called “Swiss Cheese Pervert,” the man accused of using Swiss cheese to sexually proposition women in the Philadelphia area. Christopher Pagano was arrested on Thursday afternoon as part of a joint investigation between Philadelphia and Norristown Police, officials tell NBC10. The 41-year-old Norristown resident has allegedly been spotted driving up to women and asking them if they would like to get paid to see him put Swiss cheese on his genitals.\* > **[“Swiss Cheese Pervert” Arrested: Police](https://www.nbcphiladelphia.com/news/national-international/swiss-cheese-pervert-arrest/1989953/)** > > The man accused of using Swiss cheese to sexually proposition women in the Philadelphia area went back out on the streets this morning after posting bail. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2014, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874/57 "2014-01-16T20:38:20Z")
Wait a sec-- he was offering to pay? The man’s a damn job creator! Typical fascist pigs standing in the way good, honest enterprise. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2014, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874/58 "2014-01-16T20:46:16Z")
> [@Happy\_Lendervedder](#): > > Wait a sec-- he was offering to pay? The man’s a damn job creator! Typical fascist pigs standing in the way good, honest enterprise. If Sam hadn’t used it a couple of posts ago I would say it was a cottage industry. But gouda for him for trying to stimulate the economy. He camembert to see anyone out of work. ---
**Author:** ![aceplace57](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aceplace57/32/3500_2.png) [@aceplace57](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aceplace57)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2014, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874/59 "2014-01-16T21:15:26Z")
_ **Bad news guys.** _ I checked the Philly jail menu. Friday is cold cuts with Swiss Cheese, mayo, and white bread. The jailers might want to put a do not disturb sign on the suspect’s cell door right after lunch Friday. ---
**Author:** ![Cognoscant](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Cognoscant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cognoscant)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2014, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874/60 "2014-01-16T21:23:26Z")
I think the guy should seek a plea deal. There is an Abondance of evidence against him. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/philly-police-warn-public-of-perv-on-the-loose/678874.md?page=4)