# Phone call for Max Planck **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 7, 2001, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/phone-call-for-max-planck/80312 "2001-09-07T23:10:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Bill\_H](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a5b964/32.png) [@Bill\_H](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bill_H)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/phone-call-for-max-planck/80312/1 "2001-09-07T23:10:25Z")
I swear the following phone conversation just occurred: \ Bill: Hello Person X: Is Max Planck there? Bill (realizing it’s a wrong number): I’m not certain. Person X: How can you not be certain? Either he’s there or he’s not. Bill: He will be if I check. (pause) Sorry, you’ve got the wrong number. Person X: (totally oblivious to perhaps the funniest joke he’s heard today) Why didn’t you just say so? Ok, it wasn’t all that funny. But it’s a true story. ---
**Author:** ![Padeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@Padeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Padeye)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/phone-call-for-max-planck/80312/2 "2001-09-07T23:26:59Z")
Quantum meta-humor, Narf! ---
**Author:** ![Pink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/71c47a/32.png) [@Pink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pink)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2001, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/phone-call-for-max-planck/80312/3 "2001-09-07T23:45:11Z")
If that’s the one with the thought experiment about a cat in a box, I don’t get it. Otherwise I do, but the cat’s dead. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2001, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/phone-call-for-max-planck/80312/4 "2001-09-08T01:09:19Z")
Ah, my sig on another board: When Schroedinger’s cat’s away, the mice may or may not play. It’s impossible to tell. ---
**Author:** ![Manduck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manduck/32/256_2.png) [@Manduck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manduck)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2001, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/phone-call-for-max-planck/80312/5 "2001-09-08T03:45:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Bill H. \* > \*\*I swear the following phone conversation just occurred: > > \ > Bill: Hello > Person X: Is Max Planck there? > \*\* Bill[sub]2[/sub]: Constantly 😃 ---
**Author:** ![DeathLlama](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f07891/32.png) [@DeathLlama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeathLlama)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2001, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/phone-call-for-max-planck/80312/6 "2001-09-08T04:11:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Bill H. \* > \*\*I swear the following phone conversation just occurred: > > …Bill: He will be if I check…\*\* um…isn’t that Heisenberg? ---
**Author:** ![douglips](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@douglips](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/douglips)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2001, 5:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/phone-call-for-max-planck/80312/7 "2001-09-08T05:34:08Z")
“Is Max Planck there?” “No, he’s busy preventing the Ultraviolet Catastrophe.” “Is Max Planck there?” “I can’t tell, there’s a giant black radiator between me and his desk absorbing all light.” “Is Max Planck there?” “No, he’s having a cavity filled.” “Is Erwin Schroedinger there?” “I’m afraid to look.” “Is Erwin Schroedinger there?” “He may be feeding his cat.” “Is Werner Heisenberg there?” “I’m not certain.” “Is James Watt there?” “He’s got too much work to do, and not enough time to do it in.” “Is James Watt there?” “He’s being beaten up by a black, a woman, two jews and a cripple.” [sup]\*[/sup] “Is Alessandro Volta there?” “We had to let him go - he wasn’t working up to his potential.” “Is Newton there?” “Hold on - let me use the force.” “Is Newton there?” “He’s in the hospital with a concussion. We found him unconcious in the garden smeared with applesauce.” “Is Bose or Einstein in?” “They are both in the same office.” “May I speak to Fermi and Dirac?” “My boss Pauli just told me you can only speak to one or the other.” “Is Hawking there?” “No, he’s slowly evaporating. Can I take a message?” OK, enough. [sup]\*[/sup][sub]Not actually a Physics joke.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![douglips](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@douglips](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/douglips)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2001, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/phone-call-for-max-planck/80312/8 "2001-09-08T05:37:38Z")
OK, one more. “Is Werner Heisenberg in?” “Yes, but I don’t know when he’s leaving.” ---
**Author:** ![Bill\_H](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a5b964/32.png) [@Bill\_H](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bill_H)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2001, 6:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/phone-call-for-max-planck/80312/9 "2001-09-08T06:28:46Z")
**DeathLlama** wrote > [@](#): > > um…isn’t that Heisenberg? Like I say, it wasn’t the funniest (or most accurate) joke ever, but it really happened. I figure I deserve a point or two for that, wouldn’t you think? ---
**Author:** ![Legomancer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/779978/32.png) [@Legomancer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Legomancer)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2001, 6:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/phone-call-for-max-planck/80312/10 "2001-09-08T06:58:04Z")
PHONE CALL FOR J. ALFRED a one-act play by Legomancer (On the stage is a small table and a phone.) (Phone rings.) PRUFROCK enters from stage left, answers phone. PRUFROCK: Hello? MERMAID (over phone, singing): Delta Dawn, what’s that flower you’ve got on? Could it be a faded rose from days gone by? PRUFROCK: Excuse me? MERMAID: Is this 555-6479? PRUFROCK: No, this is 555-6476. MERMAID: My mistake. Sorry. (hangs up) PRUFROCK rolls his trousers, exits stage right. Curtain. ---
**Author:** ![DeathLlama](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f07891/32.png) [@DeathLlama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeathLlama)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2001, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/phone-call-for-max-planck/80312/11 "2001-09-08T14:22:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Bill H. \* > \*\* > Like I say, it wasn’t the funniest (or most accurate) joke ever, but it really happened. I figure I deserve a point or two for that, wouldn’t you think? \*\* Oh, of course. I just thought it was hilarious at first. So I sent the link to my wife who just didn’t get any of it. While I was trying to explain I got to thinking, then had to do a few searches and found that it wasn’t as funny as I origionally thought. But hey, you deserve points. None of that would have likely occured to me… DeathLlama: Hello? Person X: Is Max Planck there? DeathLlama: I’m sorry, you’ve got the wrong number. See, a whole lot less funny.