# Photos to not use on dating sites **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 20, 2008, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188 "2008-07-20T22:34:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2008, 5:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188/61 "2008-07-22T05:43:55Z")
[QUOTE=OtakuLoki] Half beard pics are not going to impress more than an infinitesimal fraction of the population. [/QUOTE] Ok, you lost me. What’s a half-beard pic? ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2008, 5:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188/62 "2008-07-22T05:58:23Z")
[QUOTE=Sublight] Ok, you lost me. What’s a half-beard pic? [/QUOTE] Well, something like this [pic](http://www.flickr.com/photos/28906214@N08/). ---
**Author:** ![gravitycrash](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/977dab/32.png) [@gravitycrash](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gravitycrash)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2008, 6:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188/63 "2008-07-22T06:36:59Z")
[QUOTE=OtakuLoki] Well, something like this [pic](http://www.flickr.com/photos/28906214@N08/). [/QUOTE] Haha, thank you for making me feel so much better about myself. I mean what was this guy thinking. ---
**Author:** ![Ichbin\_Dubist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/51bf81/32.png) [@Ichbin\_Dubist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ichbin_Dubist)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2008, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188/64 "2008-07-22T12:22:31Z")
[QUOTE=Sleeps With Butterflies] When you meet the person, they’re going to notice if you’re considerably heavier than your picture makes you appear. Wouldn’t you want someone to see you accurately so there are no uncomfortable moments on your first date? Anyone ever meet someone who has done this? Done it themselves? Have a friend? A theory? [/QUOTE] I think it’s a mix of optimism and denial. A friend of mine is male and about 5’7". His height is honestly presented on his dating profile, but he doesn’t pay attention to a woman’s height restrictions (and many have them) when he writes to them. His hope is that he is good looking, smart, and funny enough that they will consider writing back anyway (and they often do, apparently – “People aren’t necessarily as shallow as they think they are” is his explanation). I think a man who _lies_ about his height in his dating profile is thinking along the same lines but with less confidence – that when they meet you, they will be willing to overlook your height _and_ your deception. Probably this is not as successful. That’s my theory. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2008, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188/65 "2008-07-22T13:59:40Z")
Word to the wise - stills from the surveillance camera at 7-11 aren’t good, even if you were acquitted. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Telperien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2008, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188/66 "2008-07-22T14:10:24Z")
[QUOTE=Slithy Tove] I hope your day is somewhat redeemable in that you and I together thwarted the hopes of (that other message board which may not be mentioned) that this would descend into a flame war 🙂 [/QUOTE] Haha. It got better after that, but I think mainly because I mentally smacked myself and said, “Hey, stop that!” I really don’t understand the angle shot phenomenon. I tried a few times just for the hell of it, and trust me, there’s no angle (except perhaps one that only shows my feet) that disguises my size. If your size is such an issue that you feel compelled to try to disguise it, working to reduce it is a much better option. ---
**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2008, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188/67 "2008-07-22T14:13:24Z")
[QUOTE=Rascal’s Mom] I was hoping to find actually photographs. After my divorce, when I had finally decided I was ready to try dating again, I went on something like match and, lo and behold, found my ex’s profile. I read through it, gagging all the way. Decided to check out the pictures. In one of the pictures - and I am dead serious here - he was pushing his nose up with the tip of his finger, you know, making a pig nose. I busted up laughing (at work, unfortunately). I had to minimize it and go grab my friend to come and look. Made our day. [/QUOTE] This is priceless. I think I’m laughing as hard as you were. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Rascal\_s\_Mom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/a698b9/32.png) [@Rascal\_s\_Mom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rascal_s_Mom)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2008, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188/68 "2008-07-22T14:25:12Z")
[QUOTE=Ellen Cherry] This is priceless. I think I’m laughing as hard as you were. 😛 [/QUOTE] I wonder if that could somehow be made into a commercial… I don’t know for what though. I am glad you enjoyed. It was surreal. ---
**Author:** ![Maastricht](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e57/32.png) [@Maastricht](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maastricht)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2008, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188/69 "2008-07-22T15:02:42Z")
If you are making a picture with an outstretched arm, please refrain from the " is this camera working?"-look on your face. Your future wife won’t pick a guy whose picture expresses doubts about her settings. [QUOTE=Jackknifed Juggernaut] When marketing yourself based on your cash roll, don’t show the small bills, like [the last](http://www.bspcn.com/2008/04/09/5-myspace-morons/) guy. [/QUOTE] Those are some sadpit pictures. (new word, coined by Dopers in a recent thread, combining “sad” with “stupid”.) By the way, have you seen the comment someone left below those pictures? I thought it was kinda poetic, in an unintended way. I mean raise your kids raise your kids raise your god damn kids ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2008, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188/70 "2008-07-22T16:20:04Z")
I liked the comment “We all Want it, But those who Have it sure as heck don’t Photograph themselves standing in {it}” {addition mine, based on what would make sense} - anybody up for the challenge of photoshopping a picture of Bill Gates standing around holding a wad of cash, with a bunch of it in his mouth? 😃 (Looking at those pictures actually does make me sad - that these young men have been raised so completely crippled socially.) ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2008, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188/71 "2008-07-22T16:31:21Z")
[QUOTE=Maastricht] Those are some sadpit pictures. (new word, coined by Dopers in a recent thread, combining “sad” with “stupid”.) [/QUOTE] Maybe I’m missing something from not reading the original thread, but shouldn’t it be “sadpid”? ---
**Author:** ![Nawth\_Chucka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c57346/32.png) [@Nawth\_Chucka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nawth_Chucka)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2008, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188/72 "2008-07-22T16:46:33Z")
[QUOTE=featherlou] (Looking at those pictures actually does make me sad - that these young men have been raised so completely crippled socially.) [/QUOTE] Feel sadder that they fit into their social group just fine. And whomever they reproduce with will L-O-V-E their pictures and think they are too kewl and put them on their cellphones to show all their friends. ---
**Author:** ![Ichbin\_Dubist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/51bf81/32.png) [@Ichbin\_Dubist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ichbin_Dubist)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2008, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188/73 "2008-07-22T19:13:46Z")
[QUOTE=Shodan] Word to the wise - stills from the surveillance camera at 7-11 aren’t good, even if you were acquitted. [/QUOTE] It’s a dream of mine to set up a date with someone whose profile says “Looking for a partner in crime,” have her pick me up in her car in front of a bar or restaurant, and jump in with a burlap sack with a dollar sign on it, screaming “Floor it!” Maybe afterwards she could take my picture with the loot in my mouth. ---
**Author:** ![Maastricht](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e57/32.png) [@Maastricht](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maastricht)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2008, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188/74 "2008-07-22T19:19:54Z")
[QUOTE=KneadToKnow] Maybe I’m missing something from not reading the original thread, but shouldn’t it be “sadpid”? [/QUOTE] :smack: I sit corrected. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Cardinal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardinal/32/4000_2.png) [@Cardinal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardinal)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2008, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188/75 "2008-07-22T19:34:17Z")
Oh, and don’t use your allotted dating site pictures to show us your dog or cat. Seriously, no one cares. In fact, it’s a little off putting to know that you lurve your pet that much. It’s a pet. ---
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2008, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188/76 "2008-07-22T21:05:12Z")
[QUOTE=Maastricht] By the way, have you seen the comment someone left below those pictures? I thought it was kinda poetic, in an unintended way. I mean raise your kids raise your kids raise your god damn kids [/QUOTE] It is poetry: [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rN2VqFPNS8w&feature=related](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rN2VqFPNS8w&feature=related) ---
**Author:** ![Tool\_of\_the\_Conspiracy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bc79bd/32.png) [@Tool\_of\_the\_Conspiracy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tool_of_the_Conspiracy)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2008, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188/77 "2008-07-22T21:20:58Z")
Google ad for this thread: “Learn what herpes looks like. Info on diagnosing and treating herpes.” ---
**Author:** ![Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sleeps_With_Butterflies)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2008, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188/78 "2008-07-22T21:32:46Z")
[QUOTE=Ichbin Dubist] I think it’s a mix of optimism and denial. A friend of mine is male and about 5’7". His height is honestly presented on his dating profile, but he doesn’t pay attention to a woman’s height restrictions (and many have them) when he writes to them. His hope is that he is good looking, smart, and funny enough that they will consider writing back anyway (and they often do, apparently – “People aren’t necessarily as shallow as they think they are” is his explanation). I think a man who _lies_ about his height in his dating profile is thinking along the same lines but with less confidence – that when they meet you, they will be willing to overlook your height _and_ your deception. Probably this is not as successful. That’s my theory. [/QUOTE] That makes sense. I can see where someone might look at it that way. Still, since as humans we all have preferences, I’d rather not have the feeling that someone is overlooking something about me, especially something I “tricked” them into. Oh well, to each their own. I’m not sure I classify that as shallow, since we all have things we do and don’t like. Just because some preferences are physical, it doesn’t make them less important. I’m only 5 feet tall. Some men don’t like short women. That doesn’t hurt my feelings a bit, and I prefer to know preferences up front. [QUOTE=Cardinal] Oh, and don’t use your allotted dating site pictures to show us your dog or cat. Seriously, no one cares. In fact, it’s a little off putting to know that you lurve your pet that much. It’s a pet. [/QUOTE] I’m sorry, this is just silly. Perhaps they are trying to find someone who also has a deep love of animals. Believe it or not, not all of those people are looking for YOU. Why shouldn’t people post pictures (text, bios, etc) that show who they are as a person? Maybe they DO want to show that side of themselves so they can weed out the wrong people. No wonder people have such a hard time with dating. People are beyond picky about what eliminates people from their dating pool. One quirky picture and some people aren’t willing to even have a conversation with someone. ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2008, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188/79 "2008-07-22T21:50:51Z")
[QUOTE=Sleeps With Butterflies] I’m sorry, this is just silly. Perhaps they are trying to find someone who also has a deep love of animals. Believe it or not, not all of those people are looking for YOU. Why shouldn’t people post pictures (text, bios, etc) that show who they are as a person? Maybe they DO want to show that side of themselves so they can weed out the wrong people. No wonder people have such a hard time with dating. People are beyond picky about what eliminates people from their dating pool. One quirky picture and some people aren’t willing to even have a conversation with someone. [/QUOTE] There is someone out there for everyone. (Excuse me while I go take a picture of my dog with wads of cash stuffed in his collar). ---
**Author:** ![Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sleeps_With_Butterflies)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2008, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188/80 "2008-07-22T21:59:19Z")
[QUOTE=Dangerosa] There is someone out there for everyone. (Excuse me while I go take a picture of my dog with wads of cash stuffed in his collar). [/QUOTE] Please don’t forget to put sunglasses on him and flash a peace sign. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/photos-to-not-use-on-dating-sites/457188.md?page=5)