# "Physically" is the new "literally" **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 30, 2007, 1:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565 "2007-10-30T13:22:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Jurph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/50afbb/32.png) [@Jurph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jurph)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 1:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565/1 "2007-10-30T13:22:01Z")
Oh, the bullshit, how it burns. It burns like getting your ass waxed and then wiping with #4 steel wool. Well-meaning but addle-pated support personnel have added the word “physically” to their lexicon to describe actions which must be carried out virtually. Today I am on the phone with Joan the Drone and she tells me, in an oh-so-chipper voice > [@Joan the Drone](#): > > …you’re going to have to physically go to the website and… and I am suddenly terrified that to change my records I must find a server room, or perhaps slap on a pair of VR goggles during a proton storm, or maybe get stuck in the Holodeck. Because otherwise, the only way I can get to the website is to _figuratively_ “go” there. The verb “to go” is figurative because my physical form is not going anywhere. My chapped ass will remain in this office chair for the duration of my visit to your fucked-up website. It doesn’t end there, though! She lets me know that once I have physically visited this website, I’ll need to > [@](#): > > …physically click on the link that says “travel reservations”… Except that the only thing I can _physically_ click is my mouse, because every other goddamn thing I can click on is an icon in a virtual space. I’ll have to interact with every one of them virtually! I can’t _physically_ touch any of them without sticking my hand through the monitor, which I’m getting ready to do, because she then tells me I’ll have to > [@](#): > > …physically scroll down… and that just terrifies me. I have metaphorically scrolled; I have figuratively scrolled; but the only time I ever had the opportunity to physically scroll was at High Holiday services when the rabbi asked me to dress the Torah\*. I am computer literate, I can use a typewriter, and I can even write longhand in a notebook, but I haven’t held a physical scroll in quite a while unless you count my diplomas. I had understood “scrolling” to be an analogy or a metaphor but apparently if I go physically visit this web site, and physically click some of their icons, I’ll be able to literally scroll through their documents. I am left to envision a seriously fucked-up OCR machine responding to my mouse-wheel. I stifle a scream of recreational outrage over the telephone as I slowly turn purple. I complete the call, and exhale with relief as the stupidity stops wafting from my phone. I briefly wonder whether there is a visible fog of the stuff hovering around my ear, but then I realize, “No, there isn’t - I’m just imagining that your stupidity could possibly have a physical manifestation.” Joan, you’re not alone! Your words have simply been the metaphorical last straw which has broken this hypothetical ruminant’s spinal column with its virtual weight. In the last few months I’ve heard such gems as > [@](#): > > …physically send the e-mail… > [@](#): > > …that diagram physically speaks to the issue at hand… and > [@](#): > > …physically change the way we think about this problem… “Physically change the way we think?” You mean people around here should stop using the grey stuff in their skull and switch to maybe their liver? Or perhaps the problem is that some of you have been thinking with your rectal cavities, and the switch would be to something that’s connected more-or-less directly to your spinal cord? Joan, and the countless others who commit this sin: I am quite angry with you for your misuse of the language. I am so mad that I would like to literally reach into my dictionary for some adverbs and physically stuff them down your throat. But I can’t – because they’re fucking ADVERBS! Just like websites, computer icons, and the act of paging through an electronic document, adverbs are virtual, metaphorical, and insubstantial. They have no meaningful physical presence! Wishing will not bring form to their void, and boy are you lucky because if I could wish hard enough to make adverbs manifest you’d be literally choking on your words. For your sins I hereby ban you from using adverbs, analogies, metaphors, or idioms for the next 90 days, and sentence you to read **Eats, Shoots and Leaves** once a day while being literally and physically flogged with your mouse cable. I invite you to metaphorically get fucked – because “physically” is too good for you lot. - - I declined because I am _goyische_ and wasn’t sure whether I would metaphorically contaminate the sacred text by handling it, but that’s another story. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565/2 "2007-10-30T13:28:23Z")
Well, you can blame the misuse of _literally_, since they need some other word to _actually_ mean literally (although _actually_ does a better job IMO.) ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565/3 "2007-10-30T13:33:58Z")
Wow. Such misuse of the English language physically makes me sick. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565/4 "2007-10-30T13:55:36Z")
That rant was, like, physically and literally penultimate! ---
**Author:** ![saoirse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@saoirse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saoirse)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565/5 "2007-10-30T14:31:24Z")
[QUOTE=Ludovic] Well, you can blame the misuse of _literally_, since they need some other word to _actually_ mean literally (although _actually_ does a better job IMO.) [/QUOTE] Would you honestly not understand the exact meaning of “We need to literally change the way we think?” People have been using “literally” to mean “figuratively” for years, and have always been able to figure out the difference. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565/6 "2007-10-30T14:38:43Z")
Word. I’ve been noticing that “physically” nonsense lately, and I hate it – it always stops me in my figurative tracks because it so patently means “figuratively”. If it means anything at all; I get the feeling that it’s becoming yet another contentless filler mouth-noise emphasizer. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565/7 "2007-10-30T14:42:06Z")
[QUOTE=saoirse] Would you honestly not understand the exact meaning of “We need to literally change the way we think?” People have been using “literally” to mean “figuratively” for years, and have always been able to figure out the difference. [/QUOTE] In some instances yes, in others, it’s a barrier to communication. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565/8 "2007-10-30T15:03:34Z")
Well, to be fair to the other side, they probably had to add the word for the people too stupid to realize that you had to actually go to a website and click a link because they probably thought they could accomplish their goal just by imagining it. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565/9 "2007-10-30T15:27:59Z")
A few days ago, I was sitting in a conference room with some software development people talking through a proposed fix to an application interface error. At one point, a developer said: “So then we need to physically move the file to the archive…” And I interrupted, with a matter-of-fact tone: “Insofar as a collection of electrons has a physical presence, yes.” There followed a moment of slow, blinking silence, as this comment was digested. And then, luckily for me, the group broke into grins, nods, and chuckles. So now you should understand why I am physically applauding the OP. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565/10 "2007-10-30T16:09:26Z")
I’ll reply to this thread momentarily. ---
**Author:** ![Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freddy_the_Pig)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565/11 "2007-10-30T16:11:45Z")
[QUOTE=saoirse] Would you honestly not understand the exact meaning of “We need to literally change the way we think?” People have been using “literally” to mean “figuratively” for years, and have always been able to figure out the difference. [/QUOTE] I’d also understand the meaning of “We need to, um, change the way we think.” The fact that I would understand it doesn’t mean that the “um” adds value. It’s a noise word. The word “literally”, formerly useful to indicate when you were speaking literally instead of figuratively, has been dumbed down into a useless “noise word” by functional illiterates misusing it. I hate it, and them. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565/12 "2007-10-30T16:12:16Z")
[QUOTE=EddyTeddyFreddy] If it means anything at all; I get the feeling that it’s becoming yet another contentless filler mouth-noise emphasizer. [/QUOTE] Well then maybe you should have a paradigm shift and think outside the box. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565/13 "2007-10-30T16:16:18Z")
[QUOTE=Cervaise] At one point, a developer said: “So then we need to physically move the file to the archive…” And I interrupted, with a matter-of-fact tone: “Insofar as a collection of electrons has a physical presence, yes.” [/QUOTE] People keep telling me nobody likes a wiseass, but sometimes wiseasses like each other. So good for you. I haven’t heard “physically” used this way very much, but “literally” is all over the place. Why do people keep needing new words to mean the same thing? Were “actually,” “really” and “figuratively” suddenly not serious enough? ---
**Author:** ![Plynck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Plynck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Plynck)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565/14 "2007-10-30T16:19:23Z")
Serves you right for calling the Physic Hotline™. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565/15 "2007-10-30T16:25:22Z")
[QUOTE=saoirse] Would you honestly not understand the exact meaning of “We need to literally change the way we think?” People have been using “literally” to mean “figuratively” for years, and have always been able to figure out the difference. [/QUOTE] With the increasing abundance of IEDs and suicide bombers, my old favorite of “he literally blew up” doesn’t as clearly indicate a temper tantrum as it once did. “He _physically_ blew up” would be even _less_ clear, IMHO. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![saoirse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@saoirse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saoirse)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565/16 "2007-10-30T16:28:10Z")
[QUOTE=Freddy the Pig] The word “literally”, formerly useful to indicate when you were speaking literally instead of figuratively, has been dumbed down into a useless “noise word” by functional illiterates misusing it. I hate it, and them. [/QUOTE] Functional illiterates like [F. Scott Fitzgerald, Louisa May Alcott and Mark Twain](http://www.slate.com/id/2129105/). ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565/17 "2007-10-30T16:28:30Z")
Glad to see you’ve noticed, Jurph, we here at the Institute of Language Abuse put a lot of effort into our “physically” campaign. We’re pleased we were able to duplicate the success of our previous “literally” campaign. In gratitude, I’ll give you an advance preview of our upcoming campaign so you can get in ahead of your colleagues. In 2008, we’re planning on introducing the word “realitywise” into usage. We have big hopes for this one; it’s a joint product that our Misusage and Neologism Departments have developed. It beats literally and physically on several keys points - it’s longer, it’s more meaningless, and, as a bonus, it’s not even an adverb. So you’ll want to start using it now. Next time it’s raining outside, tell everyone, _“It’s realitywise raining cats and dogs!”_ and think about us. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565/18 "2007-10-30T16:30:18Z")
[QUOTE=RTFirefly] With the increasing abundance of IEDs and suicide bombers, my old favorite of “he literally blew up” doesn’t as clearly indicate a temper tantrum as it once did. [/QUOTE] Are you saying terrorists don’t suffer from fits of rage? ---
**Author:** ![ticker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d07c76/32.png) [@ticker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ticker)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565/19 "2007-10-30T16:36:35Z")
This thread is just so random. ---
**Author:** ![Interrobang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/interrobang/32/17463_2.png) [@Interrobang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Interrobang)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2007, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565/20 "2007-10-30T16:38:41Z")
Curse you, **saoirse**! I physically pulled that link up on Google mere moments after you posted. Some of us do love our language myths. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/physically-is-the-new-literally/424565.md?page=2)