# Pick a wedding gown **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 21, 2012, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-a-wedding-gown/619477 "2012-04-21T03:30:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![psychobunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/54ee81/32.png) [@psychobunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psychobunny)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2012, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-a-wedding-gown/619477/41 "2012-04-24T04:36:03Z")
It’s the square right one that bothers me more. ---
**Author:** ![Renee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/renee/32/287_2.png) [@Renee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Renee)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2012, 12:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-a-wedding-gown/619477/42 "2012-04-24T12:34:29Z")
> [@psychobunny](#): > > I have to ask why anybody would show [this](http://www.weddingchicks.com/gallery/pnina-tornai-2012-bridal-collection/?pid=71238)? Either that is the most unflattering dress ever or the model has the worst boob job ever. Was that seriously the best picture they could get of that dress? From the same site: [http://weddingchicks.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/gallery/wedding-submission-gallery-237/PninaTorna32.jpg](http://weddingchicks.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/gallery/wedding-submission-gallery-237/PninaTorna32.jpg) Did they forget to zip the side zipper? Or does the dress just gape that badly? And why photograph a white wedding dress against a white background? Edit: Actually, that whole collection is awful. Look at this monstrosity. [http://weddingchicks.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/gallery/wedding-submission-gallery-237/PninaTorna05.jpg](http://weddingchicks.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/gallery/wedding-submission-gallery-237/PninaTorna05.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2012, 1:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-a-wedding-gown/619477/43 "2012-04-24T13:12:55Z")
> [@Chanteuse](#): > > And from the expressions on their faces, you’d think they were walking the Green Mile instead of down the aisle. I know they’re only modeling, but it seems to me that they could look a _little_ happier–they’re supposed to be brides, after all! This…seriously—every single one looked miserable or contemptuous. Why in the world would you have bridal models wear that expression? You want people to think “The bride is so happy, she’s glowing”, not “Did she just step in a pile of dogshit?” ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2012, 1:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-a-wedding-gown/619477/44 "2012-04-24T13:18:05Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > [I love this dress!](http://www.davidsbridal.com/Product_Chiffon-Halter-A-line-Gown-with-Side-Drape-WG3260_Bridal-Gowns-Shop-By-Style-Classic-Traditional)Look at that beautiful, stomach-hiding ruching! No nasal feeding tubes needed here! 😃 > > [Here’s one with a different neckline.](http://www.davidsbridal.com/Product_Chiffon-slim-gown-with-beaded-empire-waist-and-halter-T9850_Bridal-Gowns-Shop-By-Style-Classic-Traditional) > > [One shoulder draped charmeuse gown -](http://www.davidsbridal.com/Product_Beaded-One-Shoulder-Soft-Charmeuse-Gown-SWG439_Bridal-Gowns-Shop-By-Designer-Galina-Signature) now, _that’s_ elegant! That third one is exactly what I _thought_ would look awesome on me in a wedding dress. (It didn’t. Wow, did I look fat.) But it’s exactly what I dreamed of. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2012, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-a-wedding-gown/619477/45 "2012-04-24T13:39:54Z")
> [@Renee](#): > > From the same site: [http://weddingchicks.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/gallery/wedding-submission-gallery-237/PninaTorna32.jpg](http://weddingchicks.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/gallery/wedding-submission-gallery-237/PninaTorna32.jpg) > > Did they forget to zip the side zipper? Or does the dress just gape that badly? And why photograph a white wedding dress against a white background?\ I couldn’t see the dress because of the glare off the model’s forehead. 😃 But seriously, that could be a very pretty gown, but you’re right - it was hanging weirdly off that model. ---
**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2012, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-a-wedding-gown/619477/46 "2012-04-24T16:17:15Z")
> [@Renee](#): > > Look at this monstrosity. > > [http://weddingchicks.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/gallery/wedding-submission-gallery-237/PninaTorna05.jpg](http://weddingchicks.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/gallery/wedding-submission-gallery-237/PninaTorna05.jpg) She’s skinny AND she’s got a blob of yuck around the top of the neckline! These dresses are atrocious. The second time around, I got married in a suit. A SUIT. There, I said it. It was a pretty ivory suit, though, with lots of white-on-white embroidery. 🙂 EDIT: I [even have a photo!](http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v180/Soileau/?action=view¤t=MomTrassieChris.jpg) Not taken on the wedding day, though. I got a lot of mileage out of that suit. ---
**Author:** ![tumbleddown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e9bcb4/32.png) [@tumbleddown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tumbleddown)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2012, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-a-wedding-gown/619477/47 "2012-04-24T21:03:44Z")
> [@Kimstu](#): > > There there, no need to get your knickers in a twist. Miss Manners was just making the perfectly reasonable observation that strapless gowns are traditionally more daring and explicitly sexy-looking than other styles. Which is, in itself, false, especially given that strapless does not always equal daring or even decolletage-baring. Unless the presumption is that bare shoulders is explicitly sexy, which is about as goofy as anything I can imagine. > [@](#): > > And that daring, explicitly sexy clothing is traditionally worn by women who are out partying (the “husband-hunting debutante” reference simply alludes to the fact that the sexy dresses in this case are in the conventional deb color of white), rather than by women participating in a serious and legally binding public ritual of personal and familial partnership. But it wasn’t a simple allusion. Beyond the categorical presumption of what is and isn’t “sexy,” the suggestion was that the only women who wear “sexy” clothes are ones on the prowl is false on its face. And the presumption that a wedding must be a “serious” ritual is itself false, and that a serious ritual should be devoid of anything that might be categorized as sexy and/or unserious is false as well. The whole concept is already loaded with so much baggage sat upon women’s heads for no good reason except the logical fallacy which is the appeal to tradition that it was offensive from top to bottom before we go any further. I’m sorry, but Miss Manners was entirely wrong. And so are you. ---
**Author:** ![shantih](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f6c823/32.png) [@shantih](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shantih)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2012, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-a-wedding-gown/619477/48 "2012-04-24T21:08:54Z")
> [@Ellen\_Cherry](#): > > She’s skinny AND she’s got a blob of yuck around the top of the neckline! These dresses are atrocious. The second time around, I got married in a suit. A SUIT. There, I said it. It was a pretty ivory suit, though, with lots of white-on-white embroidery. 🙂 > > EDIT: I [even have a photo!](http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v180/Soileau/?action=view¤t=MomTrassieChris.jpg) Not taken on the wedding day, though. I got a lot of mileage out of that suit. Gorgeous! I had to do a classic double take at the picture, though – it looks like you’re holding a baby and cupping the disembodied head of a young boy. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [April 25, 2012, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-a-wedding-gown/619477/49 "2012-04-25T03:14:42Z")
> [@tumbleddown](#): > > Which is, in itself, false, especially given that strapless does not always equal daring or even decolletage-baring. Unless the presumption is that bare shoulders is explicitly sexy, which is about as goofy as anything I can imagine. Well, as you can see from the illustration in the link to the chapter that I provided (if you bothered to look at the link rather than just flying off the handle about the short excerpt I quoted), the types of “white ball dresses” that Miss Manners was describing as unsuitably sexy for a wedding **are** in fact decolletage-baring, as well as being revealing in other ways. > [@tumbleddown](#): > > And the presumption that a wedding must be a “serious” ritual is itself false, and that a serious ritual should be devoid of anything that might be categorized as sexy and/or unserious is false as well. A classic case of shooting the messenger. You personally may dislike the conventional societal presumption that a wedding ceremony is considered a serious occasion at which explicit sexual provocativeness in clothing is out of place, but that doesn’t mean that that conventional presumption doesn’t exist in our society. Heck, many houses of worship of all denominations even have official policies requiring brides to wear a jacket or a shrug or some other cover-up for the wedding ceremony if her gown doesn’t have what is considered a sufficiently modest bodice. Wanna argue that a serious ritual doesn’t have to be devoid of sexually provocative-looking clothing styles? Tell it to the rabbi, or the pastor, or the priest. Fume at Miss Manners all you like, but she’s just describing a genuine and still applicable etiquette tradition here. There is nothing misogynist or anti-feminist about recognizing the uncontroversial fact that clothing that looks deliberately sexually provocative (according to common conventions in our society about the sartorial implications of clothing) is traditionally considered unsuitable for a wedding rite. > [@tumbleddown](#): > > The whole concept is already loaded with so much baggage sat upon women’s heads for no good reason except the logical fallacy which is the appeal to tradition that it was offensive from top to bottom before we go any further. > > I’m sorry, but Miss Manners was entirely wrong. And so are you. I can see that you would very much **like** Miss Manners to be wrong about this particular etiquette convention, and that you passionately wish that the convention were changing in our society faster than it is. But the strength of your wishful thinking doesn’t make you right. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-a-wedding-gown/619477.md?page=2)