# Pick out a new last name for me! **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 17, 2002, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226 "2002-04-17T23:26:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![even\_sven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dfb087/32.png) [@even\_sven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/even_sven)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2002, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226/1 "2002-04-17T23:26:29Z")
As some of you know from past threads, I have a pretty unfortunate name. It is getting about time to change it, but I don’t know what to change it to. I’d like to keep my first name (Jennifer), because it is a good name and I am used to being identified by it. I am a little less attached to my last name, so I think that is what is going to have to go. My middle name sucks, and no other last names in my family sound good with my first name. So I’m going to have to come up with a last name out of whole cloth. It somehow doesn’t seem right to come up with a last name that sounds “natural”…it just feels deceptive. I want something hip but also a little geeky, something unique, something that would look good on screen (I’m a film major so my name ends up in a lot of credits). So far the best suggestion has been…Jennifer Robot. That is almost, but not quite right. Robots just have a few too many negative connotations. Dopers, I leave it up to you to help me through this important decision. Help me find a new last name. ---
**Author:** ![rocking\_chair](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rocking_chair/32/2918_2.png) [@rocking\_chair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rocking_chair)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2002, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226/2 "2002-04-17T23:35:41Z")
i’ve always thought you should go all out if you change your name. savage bloodsword or something that begins with an x. there aren’t enough last names with an x. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2002, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226/3 "2002-04-17T23:39:48Z")
I always thought that if I had to pick a new last name, I would pick Cray. I have no idea why. I just like it. It would sound good with Jennifer, and has the advantage of also being the name of a supercomputer. If not Cray, I’d choose something “tough,” like Decker or Stryker or Pounder or something. (I think I have latent violent tendencies). Or how about Bean? Works for me! ---
**Author:** ![stankow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cdc98d/32.png) [@stankow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stankow)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2002, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226/4 "2002-04-17T23:45:04Z")
Dragon. Just toss it around a little. “This is Jennifer Dragon calling for Steven Spielberg.” “And the Oscar goes to… Jennifer Dragon.” Nobody would ever forget it. ---
**Author:** ![Maeglin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8baadc/32.png) [@Maeglin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maeglin)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2002, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226/5 "2002-04-17T23:48:11Z")
Hmm…Cray is a good name and all, but perhaps not with Jennifer. Sounds a little too much like a certain has-been actress… ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2002, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226/6 "2002-04-18T00:24:53Z")
Why don’t you just snag yourself a man? Thousands of young women get name changes every year through this method. BEst of all, it costs nothing extra and you don’t even have to petition the court for a name change. You will, of course, have to pick someone outside of your family or the goal will not be met. BTW, you never did tell us what that unfortunate last was. In case you don’t need a man, I suggest: 1. Jennifer Underwood 2. Jennifer Merryweather 3. Or you can name yourself after me free of charge: Jennifer Shagnasty ---
**Author:** ![Scarlett67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scarlett67/32/7387_2.png) [@Scarlett67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarlett67)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2002, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226/7 "2002-04-18T00:26:00Z")
Jennifer Juniper. “Why yes, the song IS about me!” ---
**Author:** ![Dante](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dante/32/9673_2.png) [@Dante](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dante)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2002, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226/8 "2002-04-18T00:43:02Z")
I happen to know a woman who’s last name is **Mankiller**. LOVE that name. And if you like Robot, you might like my wife’s last name. It’s Skrobot. Polish by origin. ---
**Author:** ![erislover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/71e660/32.png) [@erislover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/erislover)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2002, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226/9 "2002-04-18T00:44:04Z")
Hmm, do you usually go by “Jenny”, “Jen”, or the full-blown “Jennifer”? ---
**Author:** ![Big\_Kahuna\_Burger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Big\_Kahuna\_Burger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Big_Kahuna_Burger)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2002, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226/10 "2002-04-18T00:55:17Z")
I remember a Seinfeld episode in which there was a caucasian woman who shortened her name from Chendowsky to Chen and Jerry accidentally called her and set up a date, expecting her to be Chinese. It’s worth a mention if you’re white. ---
**Author:** ![interface2x](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c0e974/32.png) [@interface2x](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/interface2x)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2002, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226/11 "2002-04-18T01:50:07Z")
Jennifer Make-fun-of-my-name-now,-bitch Just a suggestion. Colin ---
**Author:** ![even\_sven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dfb087/32.png) [@even\_sven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/even_sven)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2002, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226/12 "2002-04-18T01:52:58Z")
I always go by Jennifer (“Jenny” reminds me of the kind of girl who plays softball and wears ribbons in her hair, and “Jen” is just too short). I’ve played around with the idea of “Jenna” but it doesn’t seem right. I like “Jennifer”, it’s pleasently cumbersome. I’ve actually thought about getting married to change my name (!) but that seems a bit extreme. My current boyfriend offered to let me take his last name (Reed) without benefit of marriage, but that would be way to wierd. There are some decent ideas here (Dragon!) so keep them coming. How am I ever gonna get the guts up to do this?!?!? ---
**Author:** ![burundi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3ec8ea/32.png) [@burundi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burundi)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2002, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226/13 "2002-04-18T02:12:20Z")
My SO’s roomate’s last name is Lawless. How cool is that? Robot is a pretty great idea as well though. Or Atomic. “Hi, I’m Jennifer Atomic.” You would be such a superhero! You could pick a word you like the sound of. My cats were almost named Spatula and Gecko, just because those are fun words to say. Jennifer Loblolly. Jennifer Spackle. Jennifer Hobgoblin. All fun to say. ---
**Author:** ![stankow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cdc98d/32.png) [@stankow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stankow)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2002, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226/14 "2002-04-18T02:13:27Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by even sven \* > \*\*There are some decent ideas here (Dragon!) so keep them coming. > > How am I ever gonna get the guts up to do this?!?!? \*\* If you pick Dragon, all I ask is that you tell me what the old one is. Oh, and _don’t_ name any of your sons “George,” because English history majors can be very cruel. ---
**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2002, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226/15 "2002-04-18T02:44:35Z")
Ah…your first name is Jennifer…NOW I know the name…but I won’t say it. May I suggest DEATH! It has to be in all caps, though, and you must say it in all caps (i.e., not screaming, but all tough like.) “Hello, my name is Jennifer DEATH! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!” ---
**Author:** ![Gala\_Matrix\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4da419/32.png) [@Gala\_Matrix\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gala_Matrix_Fire)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2002, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226/16 "2002-04-18T02:47:34Z")
Could you elaborate on what kind of image you’re trying to convey? Do you like Jennifer Robot because you’re robotic? If so, you could use a number for your last name, e.g.: Jennifer Six, and it will sound like you are version six of the Jennifer line of robots. Anyway, we can probably come up with some doozies if you can be more specific. ---
**Author:** ![ResIpsaLoquitor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b3f665/32.png) [@ResIpsaLoquitor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ResIpsaLoquitor)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2002, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226/17 "2002-04-18T02:49:24Z")
**Powers**. Has a nice impact. It’s bold, assertive, and has indirect superhero connotations. And it reminds me of a Simpsons episode where Homer changed his name to **Max Power** , and actually became more popular as a result. Hey, names have an impact on perception. “Florence Nightengale” is a lot more impressive than “Lulu McAdoo.” 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Silentgoldfish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e36b37/32.png) [@Silentgoldfish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silentgoldfish)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2002, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226/18 "2002-04-18T03:34:06Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by bouv \* > \*\*Ah…your first name is Jennifer…NOW I know the name…but I won’t say it. > May I suggest DEATH! It has to be in all caps, though, and you must say it in all caps (i.e., not screaming, but all tough like.) > > “Hello, my name is Jennifer DEATH! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!” \*\* Yeah but imagine the trouble you’d have booking a hotel room? “So that’s M-U-A… how many h’s again, ma’am?” I’ve always been partial to Hobbes as a name, first or last :). ---
**Author:** ![SweetLilKitty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@SweetLilKitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SweetLilKitty)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2002, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226/19 "2002-04-18T05:18:10Z")
MacLeod. I’ve had a thing for that last name ever since I became a fan of Highlander. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Caught\_Work](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/919ad9/32.png) [@Caught\_Work](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caught_Work)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2002, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226/20 "2002-04-18T05:22:40Z")
Change it to Godsake. You could then be known as Jenni-fer-god-sake! [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-out-a-new-last-name-for-me/104226.md?page=2)