# Pick your own nickname **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 9, 2012, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428 "2012-11-09T00:31:48Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Ibanez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a4c791/32.png) [@Ibanez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ibanez)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428/1 "2012-11-09T00:31:48Z")
I’m calling dibs on **Assman**. ---
**Author:** ![Covered\_In\_Bees](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7ab992/32.png) [@Covered\_In\_Bees](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Covered_In_Bees)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428/2 "2012-11-09T00:36:28Z")
I call dibs on Covered\_in\_Bees! ---
**Author:** ![Taomist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/53a042/32.png) [@Taomist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taomist)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428/3 "2012-11-09T00:40:33Z")
Tao! 😃 (Been called that in real life by people who knew me BEFORE gaming with me, but since Tao\* is half my gaming handles, it just gets easier to call me that all the time I guess, hehe) ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428/4 "2012-11-09T01:32:09Z")
If everyone could pick their own nicknames, then conversations would go something like this: “Hi, Ace! Ace and I are going over to Ace’s place to watch the game. How about you?” “I don’t know. The last time I was invited over to Ace’s place he invited that asshole Ace, and when Ace’s wife showed up without Ace to chat with Ace’s wife, Ace kept hitting on her. I’ll go if Ace is invited, but Ace isn’t.” BTW, I’m calling dibs on Ace. ---
**Author:** ![Yorikke](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yorikke/32/4335_2.png) [@Yorikke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yorikke)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428/5 "2012-11-09T02:14:02Z")
I recently quit my job. I informed my wife last week (and she agreed!) that when I get another job, I will, from the very start, ask to be addressed as Hagar, as if it were perfectly normal. Because I [look like Hagar the Horrible](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_P4vRUBgZhaQ/TKQmL_b_r8I/AAAAAAAAAOA/vHRIgMHOMCk/s1600/HAGAR_THE_HORRIBLE.jpg). ---
**Author:** ![TreacherousCretin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/treacherouscretin/32/476_2.png) [@TreacherousCretin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TreacherousCretin)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428/6 "2012-11-09T02:30:31Z")
We would be pleased with “Excellency.” ---
**Author:** ![Marconi\_N.Cheese](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/57b2e6/32.png) [@Marconi\_N.Cheese](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marconi_N.Cheese)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428/7 "2012-11-09T02:36:04Z")
Dibs on “T-bone”. ---
**Author:** ![PlainJain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/5daacb/32.png) [@PlainJain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlainJain)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428/8 "2012-11-09T03:05:02Z")
I’ll go with Hot Mammacita. ---
**Author:** ![WordMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e8c25b/32.png) [@WordMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WordMan)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428/9 "2012-11-09T03:22:53Z")
WordMan pretty much works. ---
**Author:** ![Simmerdown](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/simmerdown/32/14859_2.png) [@Simmerdown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Simmerdown)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428/10 "2012-11-09T03:47:07Z")
“Marzipan Baby Jesus” ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428/11 "2012-11-09T04:12:43Z")
“Stinky” Because it’s ironic. Roddy ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428/12 "2012-11-09T04:24:53Z")
“Twicks” is fine. ---
**Author:** ![Nunzio\_Tavulari](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Nunzio\_Tavulari](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nunzio_Tavulari)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 7:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428/13 "2012-11-09T07:22:53Z")
god’s gift to women (must never be shortened to just Gigi) ---
**Author:** ![Becky2844](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Becky2844](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky2844)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 8:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428/14 "2012-11-09T08:08:21Z")
On Facebook I’ve been nicknamed BB. I think that’s fine as I like to shoot off my mouth. ---
**Author:** ![Mona\_Lisa\_Simpson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ce7236/32.png) [@Mona\_Lisa\_Simpson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mona_Lisa_Simpson)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 8:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428/15 "2012-11-09T08:19:23Z")
I’ve tried to cultivate nicknames; they never seem to stick. I’ve also spent a bunch of time trying to get people to call me the name I have been called since birth (middle name) and I am now in the messed up situation where my work badge and computer user ID say my middle name, but all the other paper work (including when my name shows up on the schedule) as First name. My initials have a distinct, well known vernacular meaning that I don’t want to promote. I’d like a good nick name to cover all that, but the only other name I get consistantly called is “Mom.” ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 11:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428/16 "2012-11-09T11:24:18Z")
Believe me, with a name like this, I’d LOVE to pick a nickname. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428/17 "2012-11-09T14:18:57Z")
> [@hrhomer](#): > > I recently quit my job. I informed my wife last week (and she agreed!) that when I get another job, I will, from the very start, ask to be addressed as Hagar, as if it were perfectly normal. Because I [look like Hagar the Horrible](http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_P4vRUBgZhaQ/TKQmL_b_r8I/AAAAAAAAAOA/vHRIgMHOMCk/s1600/HAGAR_THE_HORRIBLE.jpg). Holy shit, in that picture you totally do! My nickname would be Ace, but I see Ace already claimed it. I’ll go with T-Bone. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428/18 "2012-11-09T14:19:57Z")
> [@Marconi\_N.Cheese](#): > > Dibs on “T-bone”. Dammit! Just call me Koko. ---
**Author:** ![Azeotrope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/0ea827/32.png) [@Azeotrope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Azeotrope)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428/19 "2012-11-09T14:38:19Z")
I’d go with my college nickname: Beaker, Warrior Princess ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2012, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428/20 "2012-11-09T14:44:14Z")
Mr. Cool [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-own-nickname/640428.md?page=2)