# Pick your poison: Old age or young again? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 1, 2020, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737 "2020-01-01T19:43:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![CookingWithGas](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cookingwithgas/32/485_2.png) [@CookingWithGas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CookingWithGas)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2020, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737/41 "2020-01-02T14:11:58Z")
If I pick option 1, I still get option 2 if I wait long enough. I can skip college and start interviewing for jobs at 6, and I’ll be making 6 figures by the time I’m 9. It’ll be a while before my first date but I can bide my time since I get to live my young adulthood all over again. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2020, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737/42 "2020-01-02T14:31:10Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > I thought about all this too. But then I’m reminded of that Star Trek NG episode wherein Q transports Picard back to his academy days so he could “fix” all his mistakes. But all he winds up doing is alienating himself from his closest friends. And he also never reaches the rank of captain. Just a mediocre officer. > > I feel like that episode hits closer to reality WRT the above hypothetical. [Picard fixed one mistake](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tapestry_(Star_Trek:_The_Next_Generation)), i.e. getting stabbed in the heart by that Nausicaan as a young Starfleet cadet. Moreover, this do-over was in the context of _reliving_ his old life, with his old friends and acquaintances, in his old milieu. It also short-circuited the entirety of Picard’s professional development from the time of that incident until the present, and seemed to imply that there was absolutely nothing else he could have changed along the way, no feedback that he could have responded to, to get himself back on the path to being a captain. Per the OP, you’d start over as a 5YO right now, living in the present day. You’d have different friends, and presumably a different family than you did decades ago. Unlike Picard with his single bar brawl, you’d have the ability every day to shape the arc of your life every day for decades to come, making changes along the way to achieve the life you want and making informed choices along the way about tradeoffs; whereas Picard’s situation was like aiming/firing a catapult, the OP’s scenario would be more like piloting a plane. ---
**Author:** ![Mnemnosyne](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mnemnosyne/32/3347_2.png) [@Mnemnosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mnemnosyne)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2020, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737/43 "2020-01-02T14:31:54Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > I thought about all this too. But then I’m reminded of that Star Trek NG episode wherein Q transports Picard back to his academy days so he could “fix” all his mistakes. But all he winds up doing is alienating himself from his closest friends. And he also never reaches the rank of captain. Just a mediocre officer. > > I feel like that episode hits closer to reality WRT the above hypothetical. Picard was already an exceptional person, though. The same chance offered to an average or below-average shlub (like me), it would probably turn out better for them than the first time around. The question of ‘who would raise me’ is a notable one, though. Would I wind up with a random family? Would my family get de-aged to the ages they were when I was 5 (and resurrected, in the case of dead family)? The idea of being 5 again today in 2020 would be in some ways more interesting though, I think. There are so many things I know about now that wouldn’t work back then. I don’t need cheat levels of foreknowledge to have a better life; just a second chance, having been able to learn from my mistakes, would be enough. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2020, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737/44 "2020-01-02T14:41:27Z")
It’s probably a little late in the pole to make amendments, but since people are asking: You’re parents would be the same. Only except it’s 2020 and they are the same age now as when they originally had you. No one involved is aware of anything weird happening except you. Kids go bye bye I guess. Or live in a parallel universe if that helps. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2020, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737/45 "2020-01-02T15:03:16Z")
> [@dalej42](#): > > 1. I’d correct every mistake I made in high school and college. See, I’d repeat them, but with vigor. ---
**Author:** ![MoonMoon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moonmoon/32/2959_2.png) [@MoonMoon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MoonMoon)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2020, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737/46 "2020-01-02T15:48:54Z")
> [@Bear\_Nenno](#): > > Live another 80+ years or live another 10 years (all the while knowing the exact date of your death)?? Yea, I’ll go with option 1. I can’t even see a downside to #1. And with the added bonus of correcting some mistakes. Yeah, I don’t see this as a difficult choice at all. ---
**Author:** ![Bibliothecarius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b2d939/32.png) [@Bibliothecarius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bibliothecarius)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2020, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737/47 "2020-01-02T16:41:03Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > It’s probably a little late in the pole to make amendments, but since people are asking: > > You’re parents would be the same. Only except it’s 2020 and they are the same age now as when they originally had you. No one involved is aware of anything weird happening except you. Except your parents wouldn’t be the same people. Even if the genetics of everyone and their parents/grandparents/etc somehow remain the same, your upbringing and the era you were raised in have a massive influence on your personality and values. If my parents had been born in my generation instead of their own, they would have turned out a lot differently. And my grandparents would have had to be Baby Boomers instead of my parents, which again would have changed them and how they brought up my parents. So on down the line. On a side note, I am very fond of [this novel](https://www.amazon.com/Replay-Ken-Grimwood/dp/068816112X) which explores the idea of being able to go back and relive a large portion of your life but still having your knowledge from the future. Being able to “predict” future events to make money = awesome. Having to relive your teen years with limited power to actually change your life yet = not so much. ---
**Author:** ![naita](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/naita/32/5862_2.png) [@naita](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/naita)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2020, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737/48 "2020-01-02T17:12:34Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > **Option 1:** You are five years old again. Except, you’re still the “you” you are today. All your memories and knowledge are still in tact. You still have all the wants and desires of an adult: Adult friendships, adult romance, libido, etc… The hell being, all of these things are impossible to find as a 5yo. I could easily go several years without sex, and with all my memories and knowledge intact I’m an exceptionally intelligent child who will breeze through school and/or I can just homeschool myself! Then I’ll write a book about how I’m genuinely an old soul in a young body, sell millions to the idiot “reincarnation is real!” crowd, and be set for life. ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2020, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737/49 "2020-01-02T17:15:26Z")
If I’m 5 years old with the knowledge I have today, I’ll likely rule the world by the time I’m 25. You should start sucking up immediately. Early bribes are cheap–ice cream, cookies, etc. Prolly won’t want cash until I’m at least 7… ---
**Author:** ![Horatius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horatius/32/3572_2.png) [@Horatius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatius)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2020, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737/50 "2020-01-02T17:29:32Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > I think this is an overly simplistic way of addressing the Hypo. Being an adult trapped inside of a 5yo body would have severe psychological issues. If it were to happen randomly, sure, but in this case, you’ve been offered a choice. That wold mitigate most of the negatives. > [@Aspidistra](#): > > That aspect of it would actually be a negative for me. I’d be spending my childhood time acting dumb(-ish) and flying under the radar. > > I wouldn’t want to be treated like a circus freak and it seems like you couldn’t take advantage of the fact that you’re as knowledgeable as a 30-year-old without explaining WHY you’re as knowledgeable as a 30-year-old But there’s a big grey area between pretending to be a normal 5yo, and being a circus freak. Just consider how much time and effort kids waste on “trying out” things they end up deciding they don’t like to do. You could focus all that on the things you already know you like. Spend an extra 15 years becoming a better woodworker, musician, martial artist, author, whatever, before you have to buckle down and start supporting yourself again. You’d be set to have the best career possible right from the beginning. You’d also benefit from the greater discipline in things like buying a house. How many people wasted too many years and too much money in their 20s? You could avoid all of that. ---
**Author:** ![robardin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/43a26b/32.png) [@robardin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robardin)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2020, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737/51 "2020-01-02T20:47:10Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > But wouldn’t school be incredibly boring? Also, wouldn’t it suck being stuck around kids all day? And wouldn’t it be next to impossible to forge any meaningful friendships with said kids? > > It all sounds like a nightmare to me. But jumping ahead to being an old person with foreknowledge that you have 10 years left of life is … less of a nightmare? That’s what’s implied by “fast-forwarded”, at any rate - that you were fated to live much longer than 10 more years from now, as opposed to simply saying, “you have 10 more years to live from now” (i.e., if you’re 50, “hey you never knew, but you were always going to die at 60”, or if you were 35, “hey you never knew, but you were always going to die at 45”). In which case, the only way Scenario #2 has any upside is if I were someone who was already old, world-weary, ready to die, with nobody who would miss me if I died in 10 years, and in dire straits financially or health-wise such that “10 years of relative comfort” sounds more attractive than 50+ more years of existence. As for Scenario #1, I had assumed you meant “go back to when you were 5 years old but with your memories as they are now intact”, that would be GREAT and I would sign up for that in a heartbeat. It’d kind of be like being a looper-type individual (“Kalachakra”) from the book, [_The First Fifteen Lives of Harry August_](https://www.amazon.com/First-Fifteen-Lives-Harry-August/dp/0316399620/ref=sr_1_1?crid=29O7BE1SW0WR1&keywords=the+first+fifteen+lives+of+harry+august&qid=1577997700&sprefix=the+first+fifteen%2Caps%2C160&sr=8-1). (In contrast to another excellent and well-known “looper life” book already mentioned, Replay by Ken Grimwood, in this book people reset to their original life in their original eras, but only regain their full and accumulated-through-all-iterations memory around the age of four or five.) Sure, being an adult mind in a child’s body is a special kind of tedium, but one that can be suffered in exchange for things like foreknowledge of events and an adult’s understanding of time - one of the biggest sources of emotional stress for a kid is not realizing just how small potatoes most of the things kids stress over are. At least, the kind of things I stressed over as a kid. Since for the most part, I was pretty happy with my childhood. I was kind of a loner as a kid anyway, spent a lot of time reading on my own, so I get to do all that again, but with a different set of books. If you are saying I’m turned into my 5-year-old physical self _in situ_, I’d need to know who was my guardian. And as a father of three, it’d be kind of strange to disappear on them. If I had time to forewarn them so they were in on it, things could be REALLY interesting. My wife would probably not willingly sign up for being my mother, though… ---
**Author:** ![robardin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/43a26b/32.png) [@robardin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robardin)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2020, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737/52 "2020-01-02T20:54:27Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > It’s probably a little late in the pole to make amendments, but since people are asking: > > You’re parents would be the same. Only except it’s 2020 and they are the same age now as when they originally had you. No one involved is aware of anything weird happening except you. > > Kids go bye bye I guess. Or live in a parallel universe if that helps. I can only assume you, as the creator of this scenario, are relatively young and childless then, with two living parents. Anyone who’s lost a parent they loved, or “lost” to ill health or dementia, might gladly re-live a happy childhood with them again. And “well, what happens to the family I am currently responsible for?” is the first thought that would come to the mind of someone who was a parent. The answer, “well they don’t get hurt, just non-existed” is NOT an answer. (Read that book, \*Replay \*by Ken Grimes, for a very, very accurate take on that, IMHO, from a loving parent.) ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2020, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737/53 "2020-01-02T21:41:41Z")
> [@robardin](#): > > I can only assume you, as the creator of this scenario, are relatively young and childless then, with two living parents. > > Anyone who’s lost a parent they loved, or “lost” to ill health or dementia, might gladly re-live a happy childhood with them again. > > And “well, what happens to the family I am currently responsible for?” is the first thought that would come to the mind of someone who was a parent. The answer, “well they don’t get hurt, just non-existed” is NOT an answer. (Read that book, \*Replay \*by Ken Grimes, for a very, very accurate take on that, IMHO, from a loving parent.) I’m 49. My kids are adults. I think maybe this thread has fallen down the rabbit hole due to my poor articulation in the OP. My hypo was only meant as a mental exercise to test the old saying: “If I could only go back knowing what I know now”. I was currious, if people could really enjoy such a thing if taken away advantages such as knowing lotto numbers or what stocks are going to sky rocket. I was trying to force people to look more critically at what their social dynamic would be like, and how much they would miss being an adult doing adult things. I missed the mark a bit, but despite that this thread has been interesting, and some really good points were made contrary to my opinion. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2020, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737/54 "2020-01-02T21:54:21Z")
> [@Bibliothecarius](#): > > On a side note, I am very fond of [this novel](https://www.amazon.com/Replay-Ken-Grimwood/dp/068816112X) which explores the idea of being able to go back and relive a large portion of your life but still having your knowledge from the future. Being able to “predict” future events to make money = awesome. Having to relive your teen years with limited power to actually change your life yet = not so much. It was a take on reliving one’s earlier life that was uninformed by chaos theory. (I can’t blame Grimwood: _Replay_ was published in 1986, at a time when even many mathematicians were still unaware of the nascent field.) The ability to predict events would be limited: you may remember who won the World Series or the Kentucky Derby every year between the time you left and the time you went back to, but the results might not be the same the second time around: sensitive dependence on initial conditions - and _you’re_ one of those initial conditions, and you’re different, doing different things, impacting your surroundings in different ways than you did the previous go-around. Butterfly effect, you betcha: you’re one damn big butterfly. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2020, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737/55 "2020-01-02T22:31:49Z")
I’d rather just be who and where I am right now, but given that that’s not an option, definitely Option 1. Option 2 is unpalatable because even at age 65, I’ve still got probably 30 +/- 5 years left, and I should have another 15-20 years of good health. To abruptly shrink that down to the last 10 years, the years with the least physical capacity, would really suck. Option 1 ain’t great, but it beats a kick in the head. The real bummer, given that I’m just a few years away from retirement, is having my working life still ahead of me. Assuming (per the OP’s subsequent posts) that I’m suddenly in the body of a 5 year old _now_, I’m thinking: how can I use my extreme youth to maximum advantage? I know: _child evangelist!!_ 😃 Actually, as a longtime Jesus freak, I’m kinda serious about this. I’d love to go onto the campus of Liberty University, in the body of a 5 year old, and preach the Gospel the way it _should_ be preached, rather than the way _they_ mutilate it. And I’d be sure to have someone with a camera to record the moment when the campus police bodily removed 5 year old me from the premises, while I continued to preach. Probably make the national news, that would, and my career would be off and running. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![carnut](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnut/32/3531_2.png) [@carnut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnut)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2020, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737/56 "2020-01-02T23:08:14Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > But wouldn’t school be incredibly boring? Also, wouldn’t it suck being stuck around kids all day? And wouldn’t it be next to impossible to forge any meaningful friendships with said kids? > > It all sounds like a nightmare to me. This exactly. Being who I am today, I’d get kicked out of school. And, oh the irritation of having to live some of this stuff all over again. I’m too much of a curmudgeon as it is. ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2020, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737/57 "2020-01-03T02:51:53Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > It’s probably a little late in the pole to make amendments, but since people are asking: > > You’re parents would be the same. Only except it’s 2020 and they are the same age now as when they originally had you. No one involved is aware of anything weird happening except you. > > Kids go bye bye I guess. Or live in a parallel universe if that helps. This would not nearly be the same. For instance, my father couldn’t go to college (even though it was free) because his mother was so poor that he had to work out of high school. In the '50s and '60s he could work his way up to an executive position even without college. No way that could happen today. So, I’d have a very different life if I had the same parents today and was 5 versus being 5 in 1956. ---
**Author:** ![pkbites](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pkbites/32/204_2.png) [@pkbites](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pkbites)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2020, 5:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737/58 "2020-01-03T05:50:56Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > My hypo was only meant as a mental exercise to test the old saying: “If I could only go back knowing what I know now”. But you’re not letting anyone go back. You are merely letting them be 5 years old again in the present. Dementia can accomplish the same thing. All the knowledge that I have is from the past. And while it will help 5 year old me in the present it won’t be as much as it would help 5 year old me in the past. I wake up tomorrow and I’m 5 in 1965 is a much sweeter scenario than I wake up tomorrow and I’m 5 in 2020. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2020, 11:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737/59 "2020-01-03T11:27:58Z")
> [@pkbites](#): > > But you’re not letting anyone go back. You are merely letting them be 5 years old again in the present. Dementia can accomplish the same thing. > > All the knowledge that I have is from the past. And while it will help 5 year old me in the present it won’t be as much as it would help 5 year old me in the past. > > I wake up tomorrow and I’m 5 in 1965 is a much sweeter scenario than I wake up tomorrow and I’m 5 in 2020. That was the OP’s point. being 5YO you in the present isn’t as sweet as being 5YO you in your own past - but is it still a sweet enough scenario for you to go for it? ---
**Author:** ![pkbites](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pkbites/32/204_2.png) [@pkbites](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pkbites)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2020, 12:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737/60 "2020-01-03T12:10:14Z")
> [@Machine\_Elf](#): > > That was the OP’s point. being 5YO you in the present isn’t as sweet as being 5YO you in your own past - but is it still a sweet enough scenario for you to go for it? Is there a chicken clause? And the Original OP was not that clear as to what this was. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pick-your-poison-old-age-or-young-again/845737.md?page=4)