# Piss Dribblers!

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/piss-dribblers/72993>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [July 19, 2001, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/piss-dribblers/72993 "2001-07-19T00:30:49Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 13\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\
**Post date:** [July 19, 2001, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/piss-dribblers/72993/21 "2001-07-19T22:26:59Z")

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I always wipe off the seat, whether or not I see drips, and then I put my ass on the damn seat and do what I need to do! And if I were to make a dribbly mess for some reason, I’d sure as hell wipe it up before I left the stall.

And what is with these fucking pond scum who don’t flush their fucking SHIT? Like I really want to open the stall and find your goddamn stinky floaters staring up at me!

An anecdote from my Europe trip (from my travel journal) that is vaguely related:  
_I had to pee so I went to the Ladies’ room. All the toilet seats were soaking wet. I picked a stall and wiped the seat dry with some toilet paper. Then the toilet flushed itself, sending a geyser of water up that soaked the seat. So I dried it off. And it flushed, soaking itself. I’m not about to sit in water that’s been in the toilet, sorry. After three rounds of this I managed to dry the seat and sit down before it flushed. Sheesh._

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**Author:** ![mblackwell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5fc32e/32.png) [@mblackwell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mblackwell)\
**Post date:** [July 20, 2001, 6:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/piss-dribblers/72993/22 "2001-07-20T06:47:47Z")

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I used to work at Dairy Queen. One day every body told me that I _had_ to go look in the women’s bathroom. Some woman managed to shit on the fuckin’ wall. And on the seat and the floor. We put an out of order sign on the door and about an hour later somone finally agreed to clean it.

She must have just bent over about 3 feet from the toilet and let it rip.

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**Author:** ![deepbluesea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ba9def/32.png) [@deepbluesea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/deepbluesea)\
**Post date:** [July 20, 2001, 10:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/piss-dribblers/72993/23 "2001-07-20T10:19:55Z")

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Here’s the question I’ve always had about this phenomenom: _how_ do these women manage to dribble all over the seat like that? I’ve gone into stalls (and then hastily left) where the urine appeared to have been dispensed from an aerosol bottle. Just how do you _do_ something like that?

I thought it might come from hovering, so I experimented with hovering, and guess what? There was no urine on the seat at all, never mind the wide-scattering syndrome we’re discussing. So what the fuck is going on? Are these women simultaneously using a hula hoop and voiding their bladders? Are they peeing into a squirt gun and then shooting said gun straight up into the air? _How can they be doing what they’re doing?_ I couldn’t; there isn’t enough urine in my bladder, coordination in my body, or time in my day.

However they’re doing it, let me just say: I hate them. I hate them for all eternity. I would cheerfully support a law requiring people who routinely leave the seat wet to have either a diaper sewed onto their bodies every morning or else the renal equivalent of a colostomy bag.

Until the glad day when that law passes, though, I can only curse them. So I do. Go to hell, you evil bitchpissers. And while you’re there, I hope someone sets fire to you. And then forces you to extinguish it with someone else’s urine.

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**Author:** ![anya\_marie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@anya\_marie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anya_marie)\
**Post date:** [July 20, 2001, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/piss-dribblers/72993/24 "2001-07-20T15:39:01Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by deepbluesea \*  
> I thought it might come from hovering, so I experimented with hovering, and guess what? There was no urine on the seat at all, never mind the wide-scattering syndrome we’re discussing. Are these women simultaneously using a hula hoop and voiding their bladders? Are they peeing into a squirt gun and then shooting said gun straight up into the air? I couldn’t; there isn’t enough urine in my bladder, coordination in my body, or time in my day! I would cheerfully support a law requiring people who routinely leave the seat wet to have either a diaper sewed onto their bodies every morning or else the renal equivalent of a colostomy bag.

I do not know how they do that either, even the elderly or disabled who can go and use the toilet do not even do that.

You want urinary catheters with foley bags. AND no discreet little leg bag for them either! THESE Troglodytes Get the big 1000cc bag hanging out in the open, carried like a purse , so the whole world will know that you cannot even be trusted to use the bathroom like a normal human being.

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**Author:** ![The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/74df32/32.png) [@The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Devil_s_Grandmother)\
**Post date:** [July 20, 2001, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/piss-dribblers/72993/25 "2001-07-20T22:57:10Z")

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The things I do in the name of science……

I’m guessing here (based on my small amount of data) that **deepbluesea** is a woman with very little pubic hair. I’m a fairly furry woman, and when I tested this theory, I got a modest amount of urine on the seat (yes, I cleaned it up immediately). I am also willing to guess that if a woman attempted to “shake dry” while several inches above the seat, larger droplets would fly.

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**Author:** ![Rosebud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ea666f/32.png) [@Rosebud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rosebud)\
**Post date:** [July 21, 2001, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/piss-dribblers/72993/26 "2001-07-21T00:13:29Z")

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I’ve been considering the Nastygram approach myself, **T.D.G.**.

I work in a graduate school. Populated, presumably, by intelligent people. But there are days when I have to search the building for a non-splattered ladies’ room stall. Like others in this thread I do not understand how you can pretty much cover a toilet seat in your own urine-- and have the nerve not to clean it up! I can understand not wanting to clean someone _else’s_ waste up, since the average bathroom goer hasn’t got disinfectant and rubber gloves handy. But what makes you think someone else is going to want to clean _yours_?

In fairness I have to say that I’ve noticed something similar to what **Opal** mentioned. Sometimes, splashback from flushing will get drops of water on the seat. It ain’t urine… but I still don’t want to sit in it.

I’ve often wondered, if you’ve made a mess so bad you don’t want to clean it up yourself, what’s stopping you from calling facilities/the janitor and saying you “found” a nasty mess in the bathroom? Leave a message, damnit, no one has to know it was you!

**mblackwell** , I had the same thing happen when I was working at a Mini Mart about 5 years ago. The culprit was a young girl whose siblings had returned the restroom key while she was still doing whatever it was she was doing. So yours truly almost walked in on her-- as I unlocked the door, she comes out looking terrified and leaving me wondering a) What the hell is that smell, and b) Are her parents going to think I was trying to molest her. Her parents (and she) vanished, but when I flipped the light on I found out what the smell was. YIKES. She even got it inside the toilet paper dispenser-- she would have had to take it apart, smear it, and put it back together! I marched back inside and notified Dawn, my coworker that night, that there was no way in hell I was cleaning that up. Bleah!

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**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\
**Post date:** [July 21, 2001, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/piss-dribblers/72993/27 "2001-07-21T00:37:00Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Linear Crack \*  
> \*\*  
> First I find out women **fart** , NOW THIS?! :eek:
> 
> What’s next? **Ejaculation?!**
> 
> Oh what tangled web you women weave. \*\*

Rumour has it that women **do** ejaculate a teeny bit. Just do a search in Google on ‘female ejaculation’ and look at all the pretty sites that come up (no pun intended :D). (I don’t want to post a link here, because some of the sites are mature content, etc. and I frankly don’t want to look at them myself.)

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**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\
**Post date:** [July 21, 2001, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/piss-dribblers/72993/28 "2001-07-21T04:57:09Z")

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[quote]  
mblackwell, I had the same thing happen when I was working at a Mini Mart about 5 years ago. The culprit was a young girl whose siblings had returned the restroom key while she was still doing whatever it was she was doing. So yours truly almost walked in on her-- as I unlocked the door, she comes out looking terrified and leaving me wondering a) What the hell is that smell, and b) Are her parents going to think I was trying to molest her. Her parents (and she) vanished, but when I flipped the light on I found out what the smell was. YIKES. She even got it inside the toilet paper dispenser-- she would have had to take it apart, smear it, and put it back together! I marched back inside and notified Dawn, my coworker that night, that there was no way in hell I was cleaning that up. Bleah!  
[/quote/

I think I remember you telling that story once before. Know what? It ain’t no prettier the second time around.

\<BBBBBRRRRRR\>

[hijack]  
You still play UT? :)[/hijack]

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**Author:** ![Rosebud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ea666f/32.png) [@Rosebud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rosebud)\
**Post date:** [July 21, 2001, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/piss-dribblers/72993/29 "2001-07-21T05:17:00Z")

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Hi ya **Ogre**!

Yeah, I’ve told that happy little tale before. I would have just linked to the previous thread but I’ve been having a wee (ha!) bit o’ trouble connecting today, figured simply repeating myself would suffice 😉

Frankly I’m impressed that you remembered!

[hijack response] Yes indeed, still playing UT. We upgraded to the Game of the Year edition and I’ve had a little difficulty with some of the bonus packs, though that seems to have been cleared up with the installation of a new-to-me video card plus re-installing the entire game. Chaos UT is FUN! Li’l giggling proxy mines! [/hijack response]

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**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\
**Post date:** [July 21, 2001, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/piss-dribblers/72993/30 "2001-07-21T05:30:05Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Rosebud \*  
> \*\*Hi ya **Ogre**!
> 
> Yeah, I’ve told that happy little tale before. I would have just linked to the previous thread but I’ve been having a wee (ha!) bit o’ trouble connecting today, figured simply repeating myself would suffice 😉
> 
> Frankly I’m impressed that you remembered!
> 
> [hijack response] Yes indeed, still playing UT. We upgraded to the Game of the Year edition and I’ve had a little difficulty with some of the bonus packs, though that seems to have been cleared up with the installation of a new-to-me video card plus re-installing the entire game. Chaos UT is FUN! Li’l giggling proxy mines! [/hijack response] \*\*

Some things just kinda get inside your head and take up residence, y’know? Unfortunately, this was one of them. It reminds me of a time when a friend of mine was working as a janitor for a women’s clothing store. He used to terrify me with foul tales of the goings on in the restroom. Turned my hair white. 🙂

[hijack continued]Chaos UT is very cool. Have you ever played Tactical Ops? I may have asked you that before. It’s a lot more structured, but then it’s a real rush when you level your Parker Hale 85 sniper rifle and cap off a skulking enemy from 500 yards. 🙂 The interface is done sooooo well on TacOps. That’s almost the only UT I play anymore. Well, except for InstaGib. For some reason, I _loves_ me some InstaGib.

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**Author:** ![lee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lee/32/7455_2.png) [@lee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lee)\
**Post date:** [July 21, 2001, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/piss-dribblers/72993/31 "2001-07-21T22:08:37Z")

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In a public restroom at a rest stop in Mississippi I once saw a mother hold a very little girl about three feet over the toilet and then scream at her. The stall was already sprayed in urine from her other girl who was making a mess with the liquid soap. As the girl in the mothers hands bawled her eyes out her mother creamed, “WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? PEE ALREADY! YOUR SISTHER DID, WHY CAN’T YOU? PEE GODDAMN YOU! QUIT YOUR CRYING ALL READY AND PISS, WE ARE NOT STIOPPPING AGAIN, YOU HEAR ME!”

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**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\
**Post date:** [July 21, 2001, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/piss-dribblers/72993/32 "2001-07-21T22:47:52Z")

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OK… that explains the highway rest stops getting sprayed… (and that so-called mother desparately needs a swirly…)

But what about where I work? We don’t have 3 year olds at all most days, much less being held above toilets. And if your public hair is lush enough to cause problems, use some scissors, OK? I mean, what do you do at home, spray there, too?

I still think some women come equipped with spray attachments.

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**Author:** ![City\_Gent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a87d85/32.png) [@City\_Gent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/City_Gent)\
**Post date:** [July 22, 2001, 6:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/piss-dribblers/72993/33 "2001-07-22T06:45:51Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by deepbluesea \*  
> \*\*  
> …the renal equivalent of a colostomy bag.  
> \*\*

[hijack]  
I was recently in a public toilet that had a sign taped to the wall reading “Please do not empty colostomy bags in the sink or trash cans. Use the toilet; that’s what it is for.”  
[byejack]

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