# Pit Etiquette, and relationships in other threads **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 18, 2014, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117 "2014-01-18T00:25:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2014, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117/21 "2014-01-18T16:58:10Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Interesting topic; and it raises a question about software capabilities. Let’s say that there’s a personality that you simply can’t abide when you encounter it in an arguing forum, such as the Pit, or GD. So you choose to put the beaer of that personality on your “Ignore” list. This also leads to your missing something scintillating or insightful the person may have to contribute to a conversation in a “playing nice” forum, such as CS, MPSIMS, or GQ. > > Does the software have the ability to permit a user to tailor his “Ignore” list by forum, for each person on it? > > I recognize that this feature might be considered bizarre-to-the-point-of-uselessness, by some; but I’m still curious to know whether it exists. I doubt it does, but dunno. In any case, if a thread you’re reading has a post by someone you’ve put on your Ignore list, it isn’t entirely invisible to you; the poster’s name etc. will appear as usual, but the post will be blank, with a small note that “This poster is on your ignore list.” There’ll be a button to take her/him off your list, and another to make visible just this post. ---
**Author:** ![EmilyG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/emilyg/32/364_2.png) [@EmilyG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EmilyG)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2014, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117/22 "2014-01-18T17:24:07Z")
I guess if someone says really terrible things to you, you can put them on “ignore.” Only two people on here have annoyed me enough for me to do that, though curiously, they’re both not people who have ever even directly said anything to me, in the Pit or otherwise. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2014, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117/23 "2014-01-18T17:40:02Z")
> [@IvoryTowerDenizen](#): > > Alternative reality. A little social amnesia makes hanging out on the boards better. Yes. And don’t confuse the board with reality. I’ve been to one Dopefest. There was a poster there who’s board persona could at best be considered prickly and who eventually got banned. In person he was a gentleman, polite and engaging. ---
**Author:** ![Projammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/projammer/32/559_2.png) [@Projammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Projammer)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2014, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117/24 "2014-01-18T18:17:45Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Does the software have the ability to permit a user to tailor his “Ignor” list by forum, for each person on it? > > I recognize that this feature might be considered bizarre-to-the-point-of-uselessness, by some; but I’m still curious to know whether it exists. It’s technically possible, and would be fairly easy to implement, based on my past experience as a developer. But as far as I know there aren’t any message board packages that have actually done it. Not to the topic. I tend to approach it like we see opposing lawyers portrayed on tv sometimes. At each others throats in the courtroom and then running into each other at the bar after hours. My personal approach is to treat each forum as if all the others don’t exist. If someone I just knifed in the pit makes a good point in IMHO or asks about something I know in GQ I’ll respond appropriately for those forums. If they turn around and want to be an ass in those threads, then that’s on them. Life is to short to be giving head space to semi organized electrons. ---
**Author:** ![GIGObuster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gigobuster/32/421_2.png) [@GIGObuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GIGObuster)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2014, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117/25 "2014-01-18T18:24:18Z")
> [@Projammer](#): > > My personal approach is to treat each forum as if all the others don’t exist. I usually follow this, a few years back one pseudoscientist that showed bile to me needed help to find a movie in Cafe Society, I helped him identify the movie, unfortunately the bastard never thanked me. :sigh: I still will help guys like when they request it in the future. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2014, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117/26 "2014-01-18T18:28:33Z")
> [@Loach](#): > > Yes. > > And don’t confuse the board with reality. I’ve been to one Dopefest. There was a poster there who’s board persona could at best be considered prickly and who eventually got banned. In person he was a gentleman, polite and engaging. That’s the hard part for me. I’m basically the same person on here and in real life. (At least I think I am…would have to ask people that have met me if that’s true) I just don’t get the internet tough guy act, or saying really anything on here that you wouldn’t say to someone’s face. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2014, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117/27 "2014-01-18T18:41:09Z")
What happens in the Pit stays in the Pit, or at least it should as far as I am concerned. And the Pit should be at least a little tongue in cheek. Otherwise it’s no fun. If you get that mad in real life you ruin your digestion. Whereas “playing the dozens” can be entertaining, especially thinking up creative insults and spinning off the insults of others. Anyone can call me a douchenozzle, but I look for a little more creativity than that. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Cheshire\_Human](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Cheshire\_Human](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheshire_Human)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2014, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117/28 "2014-01-18T20:00:01Z")
> [@elucidator](#): > > Scripture says you have to love your neighbor. Doesn’t say anything about liking him. Hate the assholishness, not the asshole. ---
**Author:** ![watchwolf49](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e9c0ed/32.png) [@watchwolf49](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/watchwolf49)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2014, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117/29 "2014-01-18T20:49:39Z")
I have no problem trying to rip some douchenozzzle’s lungs out here, yet still have fun and laugh about pointless stuff with the same asshole on another board, at the same goddamn time. What annoys the fuck out of me is any dirty bastard that pits me elsewhere (with just cleaner language). What I can’t figure out is why people log into a humor site without their sense of humor … go figure … ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2014, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117/30 "2014-01-18T20:55:37Z")
> [@Loach](#): > > . . . And don’t confuse the board with reality. I’ve been to one Dopefest. There was a poster there who’s board persona could at best be considered prickly and who eventually got banned. In person he was a gentleman, polite and engaging. Aye, I have experienced that from other BBS forums, and from the old paper-APA days. Alas, I’ve also seen it the other way around! It isn’t quite as common, but I’ve met at least one bloke who wrote like a gentleman, but who couldn’t behave like one! > [@Shodan](#): > > . . . And the Pit should be at least a little tongue in cheek. Otherwise it’s no fun. If you get that mad in real life you ruin your digestion. . . . This may be the leap of wisdom I’m not successfully making. I’m afraid I let my digestion get spoiled, and sometimes lose sleep. My dumb. > [@Cheshire\_Human](#): > > Hate the assholishness, not the asshole. Grin! “Whoever shall say, thou smegma-covered turdeating fucktard, shall be in danger of BBQ fire.” ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2014, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117/31 "2014-01-18T21:37:36Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > What happens in the Pit stays in the Pit, or at least it should as far as I am concerned. > > And the Pit should be at least a little tongue in cheek. Otherwise it’s no fun. If you get that mad in real life you ruin your digestion. Thanks for the reminder. I sometimes wonder if some of the posters here are going to have an aneurysm. Or if they’re huge assholes IRL. > [@](#): > > Anyone can call me a douchenozzle, but I look for a little more creativity than that. Well, douchenozzle, you’re not gettin’ it. > [@](#): > > Regards, > Shodan Pray thee persevere, sir, digs Oh, wait, it’s the Pit… Regards yourself with a cactus sideways, digs ---
**Author:** ![GIGObuster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gigobuster/32/421_2.png) [@GIGObuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GIGObuster)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2014, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117/32 "2014-01-19T01:33:45Z")
> [@digs](#): > > Well, douchenozzle, you’re not gettin’ it. I agree with you, some people still think they also have a good sense of humor, in reality theirs is also broken just like their jerk/anti-science/anti-ignorant sensors. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2014, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117/33 "2014-01-19T01:43:56Z")
Yeah, that social amnesia thing. There are people in this very thread who disagreed strongly and even rudely with things I have said, but I can’t remember the details and I can’t be bothered to research them. This leaves me liable to piss them off again, but I’ll forget about that, too. I go through life liking everybody and assuming they like me. “Living in a fool’s paradise,” I think it’s called. ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2014, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117/34 "2014-01-19T02:05:21Z")
> [@dropzone](#): > > . . . “Living in a fool’s paradise,” I think it’s called. [Gomez Addams]: I am that fool! ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2014, 4:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117/35 "2014-01-19T04:06:41Z")
I probably have 6-8 people on my ignore list because they’re epically ignorant and refuse to change, or they’re just plain unpleasant individuals with repugnant world views. But as long as they didn’t start spouting that shit at a dopefest, I’d have a beer with them. A few people here who have unnecessarily insulted me outside of the pit, or made it too personal inside the pit, and I have a long memory about such things. But I’m not the kind of person who ‘never speaks to them again’ - that requires some pretty serious insults and behavior. (Although I can think of at least one person on this board who is not on my ignore list who has crossed that threshold.) Otherwise, I don’t necessarily take someone calling me names in the pit all that seriously, and on my own side, you should probably take what I say about 90% less seriously unless like every third word is swearing. Then you know I’m angry. ---
**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2014, 7:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117/36 "2014-01-19T07:20:03Z")
I very much like it that someone here could call me out in the Pit for one behavior or personality characteristic and still come to my support or praise me in a different context. And that has happened. ---
**Author:** ![Cheshire\_Human](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Cheshire\_Human](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheshire_Human)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2014, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117/37 "2014-01-20T01:22:42Z")
> [@digs](#): > > Thanks for the reminder. I sometimes wonder if some of the posters here are going to have an aneurysm. Or if they’re huge assholes IRL. Diplomatic Nonny: Why can’t it be _ **both?** _ ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2014, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117/38 "2014-01-20T03:41:05Z")
It takes me all of five minutes getting over being mad at someone. So my ire isn’t going to carry over into other threads. Funny story though. There was one poster on this board who I was sort of crush’n on because some of the things she was saying lately were things I could totally relate to or I thought they were really funny. I was going to post something telling her she’s an awesome girl. But before I did, a red flag went off in my head. I vaguely remembered this girl not liking me too much. After doing some brief research, I realized that this particular woman thinks I’m a total jack ass in how I relate to females. I thought better of sending that complimentary posts as I’m sure I’m the last guy she wants to be complimented from. ---
**Author:** ![BubbaDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bubbadog/32/333_2.png) [@BubbaDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BubbaDog)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2014, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117/39 "2014-01-20T13:43:25Z")
I think all of you can kiss a donkey’s butt and I plan to be mean to you in EVERY forum.😛 ---
**Author:** ![obfusciatrist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/4af34b/32.png) [@obfusciatrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/obfusciatrist)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2014, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117/40 "2014-01-20T15:19:31Z")
I find my habit of not paying much attention to the poster names in other forums helpful in this regard. A) It means it requires pretty consistent behavior on someone’s part before I notice the pattern enough to start recognizing that it is all tied to another name. B) When they post outside of whatever pattern it is that annoys me, I generally don’t notice it is them and so interact normally. But then my emotional involvement here to have “pit” relationships with anybody was pretty well worn out by 2003 or so. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pit-etiquette-and-relationships-in-other-threads/679117.md?page=3)