# Pitting the Chicago Bears **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 2, 2003, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155 "2003-09-02T16:16:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155/1 "2003-09-02T16:16:51Z")
Because they still suck and they always will! Whooo Packers!!! Gimme me a brat! It’s football season! ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155/2 "2003-09-02T16:44:07Z")
Does that mean you won’t be bidding on eBay for the VHS of “The Super Bowl Shuffle”? ---
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155/3 "2003-09-02T17:13:29Z")
Have you been dipping into Farve’s Geritol? Good god, even the Motor City kitties will take at least one game from the pack this year. The Bears and the Queens will both probably sweep. They’re desperate enough to play a banged up Gilbert B. I will take a brat though. Piled high with onions. ---
**Author:** ![beagledave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6de8d8/32.png) [@beagledave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beagledave)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155/4 "2003-09-02T17:23:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by NurseCarmen \* > \*\* Good god, even the Motor City kitties will take at least one game from the pack this year. The Bears and the Queens will both probably sweep. \*\* {snicker} Makes a note to point this thread out to NC in January. No vicodin jokes yet? ---
**Author:** ![elf6c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c57346/32.png) [@elf6c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elf6c)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155/5 "2003-09-02T19:43:16Z")
Even with playing in the worst division in football, the Pack still have no shot of going deep in the playoffs. Can you say “One and Done” I know you can. No D, no Ring. Whoops, Green just fumbled again. * * * And yes, the Bear still suck. But at least they aren’t the Lions. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155/6 "2003-09-02T19:45:45Z")
Yikes. I’m the biggest Bears lover around, but at least I give the season a few weeks before slinging the shit. Talk about your stinging offensive line for a little bit. Not OURS, YOURS. Don’t talk about Bears, or Favre or Vikings or Defense or anything else…talk about that offensive line. I can’t wait to hear how great it is 😃 ---
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155/7 "2003-09-02T19:52:29Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by beagledave \* > \*\*Makes a note to point this thread out to NC in January. > \*\* HEY! next time I’ll remember to put my _don’t show me this in January_ disclaimer in. ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155/8 "2003-09-02T20:12:22Z")
Must I weather another season of mid-western big-belt-buckle whooping and yollering? The Packer suck. The Bears suck. Picking on the _other_ sausage-stuffed yokels doesn’t really raise you that much in the pecking order, _doncha know?_ It’s like a 3-legged lame runt wolf trying become the alpha by biting the testicles of all the other lame runts. Testicle biting mid-west jamokes. ---
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155/9 "2003-09-02T20:55:50Z")
Who let the jock-sniffing coastie in? ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155/10 "2003-09-02T21:17:20Z")
I bet Waverly’s post would be really scathing if he wasn’t drunk. ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155/11 "2003-09-02T21:50:46Z")
I find myself saying the same thing about Brett Favre a lot of the time. ---
**Author:** ![Neurotik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/91b2a8/32.png) [@Neurotik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neurotik)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155/12 "2003-09-02T22:23:02Z")
So what’s Kordell’s excuse, **jarbaby**? ---
**Author:** ![chique](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4491bb/32.png) [@chique](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chique)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155/13 "2003-09-02T23:16:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by beagledave \* > \*\*{snicker} > > Makes a note to point this thread out to NC in January. > No vicodin jokes yet? \*\* January? He’s high already…and headed for a long, hard fall. **NursieBabe** , haven’t you yet learned Rule Numero Uno of Viqueen Fandom? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2003, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155/14 "2003-09-02T23:51:33Z")
Who can blame him? If I was living and working in Wisconson I’d be hopped up on something too. Of course nothing quite justifies the fellating he gets from fans and football geeks alike… My Favre, who art in huddle… and now he has Culpepper seated next to him in the mid-westerner’s football pantheon, fondling his divine buttocks while feeding him sauerkraut with a golden spork. NFCycophants need to practice a bit more dignified detached indifference. They are between naked mole rats and soccer hooligans in the evolutionary tree; more like the latter, but with fewer chromosomes they get sloshed on cheaper beer. ---
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155/15 "2003-09-03T02:17:13Z")
**chique** , Shhhhhhhhhh. Only fellow queens fans are to know our terrible secret pain. ---
**Author:** ![chique](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4491bb/32.png) [@chique](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chique)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155/16 "2003-09-03T02:38:46Z")
Ooooooooh, right. Sorry. And I’ve tried **so** hard to block that out. . . . ---
**Author:** ![Beagle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/85f322/32.png) [@Beagle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beagle)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155/17 "2003-09-03T04:05:03Z")
Dopefest, or two, in Tampa during the playoffs? Nice beaches, and a realistic shot at being there. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Snake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Snake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snake)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 5:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155/18 "2003-09-03T05:34:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Neurotik \* > \*\*So what’s Kordell’s excuse, **jarbaby**? \*\* … maybe its that big lump of shit growing out the side of friggin neck. Maybe its not, but i have a feeling it is. ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155/19 "2003-09-03T13:16:16Z")
I’m not sure I ever said I liked Kordell. I’m not sure I ever said I thought the Bears were going to be great this year. You see, the SEASON HASN’T EVEN STARTED. The Bears are my favorite team, and have been since I was about ten, but I am able to step back and judge them objectively each year, rather than assuming they’re going to win it all every season. I don’t even think the Bears will beat the Packers this year…but what’s new. ---
**Author:** ![elf6c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c57346/32.png) [@elf6c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elf6c)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2003, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155/20 "2003-09-03T14:00:26Z")
My prediction, the Bears still suck this season but: 1. Kordell is benched halfway through the season. 2. Juaron gets fired, along with the staff. 3. The rookie QB leads the Bears to a win over the Pack, saving the season. 4. A-train is benched and cut after this season. 5. The defense will be pretty good again. 6. Teams will run on the Pack all year long. Farve misses games on IR due to the porous O-line. 7. Pack will win the division, but lose to a wildcard team in the first round again. 8. Farve then retires. 9. The Pack will then return to sucking again next year. 10. So will the Bears, sadly. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-the-chicago-bears/199155.md?page=2)