# Pitting UltraVires **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 22, 2018, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734 "2018-09-22T16:05:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 18
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2021, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734/341 "2021-04-28T22:21:00Z")
Now he’s incapable of understanding that teenagers have constitutional rights. (or to be fair, incapable of understanding why and to what extent) ---
**Author:** ![Babale](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/babale/32/15666_2.png) [@Babale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Babale)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2021, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734/342 "2021-04-28T22:33:15Z")
West Virginia’s dumbest lawyer thinks that child pornography laws are a violation of the first amendment, apparently: > [@High School Student "Free Speech" Case Before SCOTUS](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/high-school-student-free-speech-case-before-scotus/940931/119): > > > [@High School Student "Free Speech" Case Before SCOTUS](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/high-school-student-free-speech-case-before-scotus/940931/117): > > > > Considering her age, that would involve the creation and distribution of child pornography, a serious crime, so yes, that would be a different scenario. > > Then that law would be unconstitutional as she was engaging in free speech, no? ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2021, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734/343 "2021-04-28T22:51:45Z")
It’s like he’s incapable of remember the context of any conversation beyond the post he’d immediately replying to. It’s like debating a goldfish. ---
**Author:** ![Red\_Wiggler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/red_wiggler/32/13190_2.png) [@Red\_Wiggler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Red_Wiggler)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2021, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734/344 "2021-04-28T23:31:37Z")
Failing debater from a failing state. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2021, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734/345 "2021-04-28T23:38:27Z")
Definitely don’t think about that. Think about James Carville licking it instead. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2021, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734/346 "2021-04-28T23:57:38Z")
So then… Carville licking himself? [![](https://www.cnn.com/CNN/anchors_reporters/images/carville.james.jpg) ](https://www.cnn.com/CNN/anchors_reporters/images/carville.james.jpg) Sphynx in a suit. ---
**Author:** ![Lance\_Turbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lance_turbo/32/6156_2.png) [@Lance\_Turbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lance_Turbo)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2021, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734/347 "2021-04-29T00:08:14Z")
Jesus fuck this is some dumb lawyering… > [@High School Student "Free Speech" Case Before SCOTUS](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/high-school-student-free-speech-case-before-scotus/940931/38): > > So, if the teacher asks, “Bob, I saw on Facebook that you wanted me to lick a donkey’s balls. Do you agree with that?” should the student get counsel? Is the question forbidden? If Bob says “yes” is that actionable? ---
**Author:** ![Enjoy\_Slurm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/enjoy_slurm/32/3937_2.png) [@Enjoy\_Slurm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enjoy_Slurm)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2021, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734/348 "2021-04-29T01:03:12Z")
I feel stupider having read a couple of his posts. It’s like he’s trolling to be the biggest idiot just so people will call him an idiot so he can sit back and laugh because he’s being called an idiot for saying such idiotic things. Like he’s trying to win The Biggest Idiot Trophy. ---
**Author:** ![Superdude](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superdude/32/13450_2.png) [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2021, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734/349 "2021-04-29T03:27:11Z")
And yet _I_ get a warning in ATMB for suggesting that he actually do some research. ---
**Author:** ![TroutMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troutman/32/6721_2.png) [@TroutMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroutMan)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2021, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734/350 "2021-04-29T03:31:48Z")
Totally valid thought, but totally valid warning. Sorry. Thanks for taking one for the team. ---
**Author:** ![Superdude](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superdude/32/13450_2.png) [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2021, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734/351 "2021-04-29T15:18:04Z")
Taking one for the team? Aww, shucks. I’m nothing if not a team player. But I feel a little like [Bryce Harper](https://www.mlb.com/news/bryce-harper-exits-after-being-hit-in-face-by-pitch) after that one. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2021, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734/352 "2021-04-29T16:28:46Z")
> [@Lance\_Turbo](#): > > Jesus fuck this is some dumb lawyering… Almost every post I made in that thread to him started out, “How are you an actual lawyer?” before I’d erase it and type out my actual response. ---
**Author:** ![Lance\_Turbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lance_turbo/32/6156_2.png) [@Lance\_Turbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lance_Turbo)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2021, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734/353 "2021-04-29T16:43:52Z")
That’s the point of this thread. He makes posts that are impossible to respond to in the manner they deserve in the forum they are posted in. It’s better to quote the post here and reply without holding back than to risk violating board rules in other forums. The new board software will helpfully supply a link to this thread for the benefit of others so they can also avoid getting bogged down in Swamp Stupid. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2021, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734/354 "2021-04-29T18:37:05Z")
> [@Lance\_Turbo](#): > > That’s the point of this thread. He makes posts that are impossible to respond to in the manner they deserve in the forum they are posted in. That’s not just the point of the thread, that’s the point of the entire forum. ---
**Author:** ![Lance\_Turbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lance_turbo/32/6156_2.png) [@Lance\_Turbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lance_Turbo)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2021, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734/355 "2021-04-29T18:53:22Z")
A whole forum for dealing with @UltraVires vendetta against logic and reason? That’s awesome. I guess I’ve been using it incorrectly. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2021, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734/356 "2021-04-29T20:29:23Z")
That’s why it’s called Straight **Dope**. ---
**Author:** ![Lance\_Turbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lance_turbo/32/6156_2.png) [@Lance\_Turbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lance_Turbo)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2021, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734/357 "2021-05-11T17:39:26Z")
> [@Banning menthol cigarettes](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/banning-menthol-cigarettes/940973/13): > > Sometimes I think I went to sleep and woke up in the Twilight Zone. We are banning menthols because they kill black people? Can we stereotype more? Cut down on KFC because fried chicken has too much cholesterol, killing blacks? Prop up watermelon farming? I mean, this goes against everything I have been taught about race relations. Why am I certain that everything Dumbass has been taught about race relations would make a pretty thin book? ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2021, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734/358 "2021-05-11T17:40:55Z")
> [@Lance\_Turbo](#): > > Why am I certain that everything Dumbass has been taught about race relations would make a pretty thin book? - Paperback covers, single blank sheet inside. ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_McQwark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4da419/32.png) [@Steve\_McQwark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_McQwark)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2021, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734/359 "2021-05-11T18:28:52Z")
> [@running\_coach](#): > > Paperback covers, single blank sheet inside. Is it the kind of sheet you write on or the kind you wear? ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2021, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734/360 "2021-05-11T19:49:53Z")
Eet ees the kind of sheet you flush, I theenk. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734.md?page=17) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pitting-ultravires/821734.md?page=19)