# Please donate and help me prevent celebrity look alike midget porn stars from being eaten by badgers **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 30, 2011, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-donate-and-help-me-prevent-celebrity-look-alike-midget-porn-stars-from-being-eaten-by-badgers/598202 "2011-09-30T21:58:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2011, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-donate-and-help-me-prevent-celebrity-look-alike-midget-porn-stars-from-being-eaten-by-badgers/598202/1 "2011-09-30T21:58:19Z")
For too long the world has stood silently by and watched our celebrity look alike dwarf porn stars get eaten by badgers. We are all familiar with the case of [Percy Foster](http://gawker.com/5839596/gordon-ramsays-porn-dwarf-double-eaten-by-badger), the latest Gordon Ramsay look alike dwarf porn star to suffer such a tragic death. > [@](#): > > It was all because an observant production assistant on the set of _Hi-Ho Hi-Ho, It’s Up Your Arse We Go_ had noticed how much Foster looked like celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay. But just as Foster was set to join the rarefied ranks of celebrity lookalike dwarf porn stars, tragedy struck: The body of the 3’ 6" performer has been discovered in a badger’s den, partially eaten. No more, I say! No more! In loving memory of Mr Foster, please PM me your credit card number complete with expiration date and CVV so that we do not lose one more celebrity look alike dwarf porn star to badger predation. The madness must end! ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2011, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-donate-and-help-me-prevent-celebrity-look-alike-midget-porn-stars-from-being-eaten-by-badgers/598202/2 "2011-09-30T23:10:39Z")
“Gordon Ramsay’s Porn Dwarf Double Eaten by Badger” has now joined “Woman in Sumo wrestler suit assaulted her ex-girlfriend in gay pub after she waved at man dressed as a Snickers bar” as my all time favorite headline. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2011, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-donate-and-help-me-prevent-celebrity-look-alike-midget-porn-stars-from-being-eaten-by-badgers/598202/3 "2011-10-01T13:58:15Z")
This is why I have a weiner-dog. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2011, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-donate-and-help-me-prevent-celebrity-look-alike-midget-porn-stars-from-being-eaten-by-badgers/598202/4 "2011-10-01T14:57:17Z")
Now, we’re sure that this isn’t a trial run for an assasination attempt by a Badger Seperatist Group…? ---
**Author:** ![Cicero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cicero/32/3594_2.png) [@Cicero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cicero)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2011, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-donate-and-help-me-prevent-celebrity-look-alike-midget-porn-stars-from-being-eaten-by-badgers/598202/5 "2011-10-01T14:57:32Z")
I loved that. Stolen and used on FB. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2011, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-donate-and-help-me-prevent-celebrity-look-alike-midget-porn-stars-from-being-eaten-by-badgers/598202/6 "2011-10-01T15:48:55Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > “Gordon Ramsay’s Porn Dwarf Double Eaten by Badger” has now joined “Woman in Sumo wrestler suit assaulted her ex-girlfriend in gay pub after she waved at man dressed as a Snickers bar” as my all time favorite headline. It’s no “Scooby Doo Stole My Wife.” ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2011, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-donate-and-help-me-prevent-celebrity-look-alike-midget-porn-stars-from-being-eaten-by-badgers/598202/7 "2011-10-01T15:59:43Z")
A tragedy that knows no bounds. ---
**Author:** ![davidm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidm/32/225_2.png) [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2011, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-donate-and-help-me-prevent-celebrity-look-alike-midget-porn-stars-from-being-eaten-by-badgers/598202/8 "2011-10-01T16:08:17Z")
Funny, but a hoax. [http://gawker.com/5842001/gordon-ramsays-badger+eaten-porn-dwarf-just-a-myth](http://gawker.com/5842001/gordon-ramsays-badger+eaten-porn-dwarf-just-a-myth) ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2011, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-donate-and-help-me-prevent-celebrity-look-alike-midget-porn-stars-from-being-eaten-by-badgers/598202/9 "2011-10-01T16:15:59Z")
> [@davidm](#): > > Funny, but a hoax. > > [http://gawker.com/5842001/gordon-ramsays-badger+eaten-porn-dwarf-just-a-myth](http://gawker.com/5842001/gordon-ramsays-badger+eaten-porn-dwarf-just-a-myth) Well, damn. I hope the OP will refund my donation. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2011, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-donate-and-help-me-prevent-celebrity-look-alike-midget-porn-stars-from-being-eaten-by-badgers/598202/10 "2011-10-01T16:20:19Z")
> [@davidm](#): > > Funny, but a hoax. > > [http://gawker.com/5842001/gordon-ramsays-badger+eaten-porn-dwarf-just-a-myth](http://gawker.com/5842001/gordon-ramsays-badger+eaten-porn-dwarf-just-a-myth) Unlike ["Scooby Doo Stole My Wife.](http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/keeping_tabs/2001/01/the_year_of_william.html)" 😉 ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2011, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-donate-and-help-me-prevent-celebrity-look-alike-midget-porn-stars-from-being-eaten-by-badgers/598202/11 "2011-10-01T20:49:06Z")
> [@davidm](#): > > Funny, but a hoax. > > [http://gawker.com/5842001/gordon-ramsays-badger+eaten-porn-dwarf-just-a-myth](http://gawker.com/5842001/gordon-ramsays-badger+eaten-porn-dwarf-just-a-myth) Wait, are you saying that _The Sunday Sport_, the same publication that brought the world such award winning stories as [“World War 2 Bomber Found on Moon”](http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Admin/BkFill/Default_image_group/2011/4/1/1301668867334/Sunday-Sport-cover-006.jpg) and [“Statue of Elvis Found on Mars”](http://www.thedrum.co.uk/pub/files/photos/news/22181/main.main.sunday_sport.jpg) would publish a hoax? I refuse to buy into your cynicism, good sir, and will continue my work in saving celebrity dwarf porn stars from being eaten by badgers. > [@Siam Sam](#): > > Well, damn. I hope the OP will refund my donation. I’m afraid I cannot. Your donation has already been spent on research. I have encountered adversity from others regarding my campaign, and I am not going to stop now. Even my girlfriend joined the naysayers when she found out that I had fifty dollars worth of research DVDs overnighted to me with the donations. “You spent fifty dollars on dwarf porn?!”, she cried. “But honey, it’s tax deductable!”, I told her. I will never give up!