# Please Don't Divorce Us **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 28, 2008, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-dont-divorce-us/478892 "2008-12-28T00:25:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2008, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-dont-divorce-us/478892/21 "2008-12-28T16:32:06Z")
The whole purpose is emotion – the anti-same sex marriage argument is based entirely on emotion, rather than logic. An appeal to emotion is what is needed to sway the emotions from one position to the other. ---
**Author:** ![UltraVires](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ecccb3/32.png) [@UltraVires](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UltraVires)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2008, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-dont-divorce-us/478892/22 "2008-12-28T16:36:24Z")
> [@Muffin](#): > > The whole purpose is emotion – the anti-same sex marriage argument is based entirely on emotion, rather than logic. An appeal to emotion is what is needed to sway the emotions from one position to the other. Agreed as well. But leave the kids out of it. I hate to see that anywhere. Pro-life marches with little kids wearing T-shirts that say “Thank you, Mommy for not aborting me”. It’s fucking sick.. ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2008, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-dont-divorce-us/478892/23 "2008-12-28T16:38:05Z")
> [@clairobscur](#): > > -I don’t like the use of the word “please”. It sounds like begging, and these people shouldn’t be begging. I note several people removed this word, and a couple even wrote “you will not divorce us”. “Don’t divorce us” seems a good enough slogan to me. I disagree. I’ve said from the beginning of the post-Prop 8 discussion that what’s needed here is an emotional appeal to the majority – let them SEE and FEEL what their pro-8 vote has caused. The simple pain of “Please, don’t divorce us…” is exactly what needs to be seen, heard, and FELT. Just as people reacted to Bull Connor’s firehoses being used on non-violnet marchers, so too will people react to appeals like this. There’s a real social cost here, and anyone with empathy will be able to see it. This needs statewide – no, nationwide – exposure. ---
**Author:** ![UltraVires](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ecccb3/32.png) [@UltraVires](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UltraVires)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2008, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-dont-divorce-us/478892/24 "2008-12-28T17:06:31Z")
> [@Bricker](#): > > I disagree. I’ve said from the beginning of the post-Prop 8 discussion that what’s needed here is an emotional appeal to the majority – let them SEE and FEEL what their pro-8 vote has caused. The simple pain of “Please, don’t divorce us…” is exactly what needs to be seen, heard, and FELT. > > Just as people reacted to Bull Connor’s firehoses being used on non-violnet marchers, so too will people react to appeals like this. There’s a real social cost here, and anyone with empathy will be able to see it. > > This needs statewide – no, nationwide – exposure. But this isn’t an appeal to public sympathy, right? If you are making a legal argument and demanding that a “right” be recognized, you don’t say please. If someone took away your right to worship as you chose, you wouldn’t say “Please let me attend church”, would you? ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2008, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-dont-divorce-us/478892/25 "2008-12-29T02:47:34Z")
> [@jtgain](#): > > But this isn’t an appeal to public sympathy, right? If you are making a legal argument and demanding that a “right” be recognized, you don’t say please. > > If someone took away your right to worship as you chose, you wouldn’t say “Please let me attend church”, would you? Why do you think Emmett Till’s mother chose to have an open casket at his funeral? ---
**Author:** ![villa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/bc79bd/32.png) [@villa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/villa)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2008, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-dont-divorce-us/478892/26 "2008-12-29T03:33:19Z")
> [@jtgain](#): > > But this isn’t an appeal to public sympathy, right? If you are making a legal argument and demanding that a “right” be recognized, you don’t say please. > > If someone took away your right to worship as you chose, you wouldn’t say “Please let me attend church”, would you? I have a legal right not to be beaten by the police for no reason. But it might be more effective if a cop is wailing on me with a nightstick to say “Please stop hitting me” than “I have the right not to be hit and you are violating that right.” But this isn’t just about the legal right. That’s going to be won, the question is when not if. This is about a specific group of people who followed the rules. It’s an attempt to ensure there is a human face on what Ken Starr and his ilk are trying to portray as a simple legal question. It’s deliberately separating the legal argument out, and showing the mean spirited nature of the current attempt. That doesn’t mean the legal argument should not be made, but there is a place for this. ---
**Author:** ![Omegaman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e480ec/32.png) [@Omegaman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omegaman)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2008, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-dont-divorce-us/478892/27 "2008-12-29T18:51:07Z")
Perspective at its finest. Something that those who hate need to see. ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2008, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-dont-divorce-us/478892/28 "2008-12-29T20:23:18Z")
> [@jtgain](#): > > But this isn’t an appeal to public sympathy, right? If you are making a legal argument and demanding that a “right” be recognized, you don’t say please. > > If someone took away your right to worship as you chose, you wouldn’t say “Please let me attend church”, would you? I don’t imagine this video will be shown during the hearing on the legal issue. If my right to attend church were taken away, my legal argument would be, “This action violates the rights guaranteed to me under the state and federal constitutions.” But my public affairs argument might well be, “Please let me practice my faith.” ---
**Author:** ![moonstarssun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b9bd4f/32.png) [@moonstarssun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moonstarssun)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2008, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-dont-divorce-us/478892/29 "2008-12-30T04:22:50Z")
> [@jtgain](#): > > Agreed. Those kids are used purely for emotion. If those marriages are annulled (not divorced) then the couple will be forced to move into separate homes, have weekend visitation, and pay child support, right? Right. But after a marriage is annulled, if one of the parents dies, is it assumed that the other parent remains as the child’s guardian? Or would it turn into a big legal battle, with the kid being sent to live with some other relative? Just because they’re not breaking up households doesn’t mean they’re not taking away stability. And how horrible for these kids to be constantly reminded that their parents’ relationship is considered less than everyone else’s, regardless of how loving or how enduring. Adults have a hard enough time hearing that sort of thing, but how must it make those kids feel? ---
**Author:** ![tumbleddown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e9bcb4/32.png) [@tumbleddown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tumbleddown)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2008, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-dont-divorce-us/478892/30 "2008-12-30T20:56:50Z")
> [@jtgain](#): > > Agreed. Those kids are used purely for emotion. If those marriages are annulled (not divorced) then the couple will be forced to move into separate homes, have weekend visitation, and pay child support, right? No, but some of them may well lose access to health care coverage, or it might end up costing more than before. And there may be ramifications in terms of benefits should one of the parents die. Fortunately, California has same-sex parent adoption, so both parents can have equal legal status, but they shouldn’t have to jump through more hoops and incur more cost and paperwork. But more than anything, the status of marriage matters. The Yes on 8 side has been driving that point home at us. It means something to be a recognized, _protected_ family. It means something to have **equality**. And the status of parents’ marriages has an effect on their children. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2008, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-dont-divorce-us/478892/31 "2008-12-30T21:15:50Z")
What a great collection of photos. I especially liked the ‘traditional’ marriage pics e.g. the brides in white frilly dresses, Jewish lesbian wedding. How horrific that must be to the closed-minded, seeing these girls next door and average-looking old men happy and in love. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-dont-divorce-us/478892.md?page=1)