# Please explain to me why Roman Polanski isn't a bad guy **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [October 31, 2014, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-explain-to-me-why-roman-polanski-isnt-a-bad-guy/703126 "2014-10-31T15:14:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 8\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![LavenderBlue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e95f7d/32.png) [@LavenderBlue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LavenderBlue)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-explain-to-me-why-roman-polanski-isnt-a-bad-guy/703126/161 "2014-11-05T14:15:58Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > I don’t consider consensual sex victimization and I think statutory rape laws are ridiculous, especially in cases like this. So exactly how old does someone have to be to consent to sex? Is my three year old fair game? Or just the almost twelve year old? :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![spifflog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@spifflog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spifflog)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-explain-to-me-why-roman-polanski-isnt-a-bad-guy/703126/162 "2014-11-05T14:19:46Z")
I’ve read many of your posts over the last few days, and I’m speechless. My conclusion is that this is one huge woosh. But in the 1% chance this isn’t . . you said that > [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > So far, the alleged victims actions don’t indicate to me that she had a problem with what Polanski did to her other than perhaps it didn’t get her and her mother the financial and professional rewards they wanted. The rape took place on 10 March. He was arrested 11 March. That didn’t give the child (13 year old child) and her mother much time to squeeze Polanski and determine they couldn’t get their “rewards” before they went to the police, did it? I understand you probably aren’t going to let the facts get in the way of your odd notions, but does this timeframe change your thoughts at all? Flabbergasted that you think someone having the audacity to treat you as an equal by offering a hand shake is worse than being drugged and anally rapped as a child. If this is indeed true and not a woosh, you need some professional help. ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-explain-to-me-why-roman-polanski-isnt-a-bad-guy/703126/163 "2014-11-05T15:12:40Z")
> [@LavenderBlue](#): > > So exactly how old does someone have to be to consent to sex? > > Is my three year old fair game? Or just the almost twelve year old? > > :dubious: If they are old enough to decide to go voluntarily to a semi-nude modeling shoot, alone with a member of the opposite sex, I would say they are old enough to consent to sex. On a more practical level, anyone who is old enough to understand the mechanics of what sex is where I would draw the consent line. In an ideal world, young teenagers would understand that having sex at a very early age is a bad idea; however, we can’t forbid every bad idea in the universe from being acted upon. ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-explain-to-me-why-roman-polanski-isnt-a-bad-guy/703126/164 "2014-11-05T15:15:43Z")
> [@iiandyiiii](#): > > She says it wasn’t consensual, and he says she was his victim. Considering how differently people can react to rape and assault, I see nothing in her behavior afterwards that suggests that her testimony was false. I also believe that, morally, an adult male who would be willing to have sex with a 13 year old girl is also probably willing to have non-consensual sex with a 13 year old girl. > > So we have her testimony, and we have Polanski stating (finally!) that she was his victim. That’s more than good enough for me to conclude that it’s much more likely than not that the sex was not consensual. I believe morally, an aspiring actress who would consent to a semi-nude photo shoot alone with a movie executive who she obviously wants to work for, would be more than willing to let the movie executive do just about any sexual act he wanted with her and keep quiet about it, IF she got what she wanted. Polanski’s mistake was not offering her a lucrative contract before he screwed her. ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-explain-to-me-why-roman-polanski-isnt-a-bad-guy/703126/165 "2014-11-05T15:27:22Z")
> [@spifflog](#): > > Flabbergasted that you think someone having the audacity to treat you as an equal by offering a hand shake is worse than being drugged and anally rapped as a child. If this is indeed true and not a woosh, you need some professional help. A man sticking out his hand at a woman demanding she touch him IS NOT treating her as an equal. It is treating her like a prostitute expected to service him. ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-explain-to-me-why-roman-polanski-isnt-a-bad-guy/703126/166 "2014-11-05T15:30:57Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > A man sticking out his hand at a woman demanding she touch him IS NOT treating her as an equal. It is treating her like a prostitute expected to service him. It’s not a demand, it’s a request. I work in a community with many Orthodox Jews. I’ve seen men and women extend their hands and the other party decline and it’s treated with respect and sensitivity. If every request is interpreted as a demand, then we have real problems. If you’re interpreting it as a demand, then the problem is yours. If the other party is offended if you decline, then the problem is theirs. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-explain-to-me-why-roman-polanski-isnt-a-bad-guy/703126/167 "2014-11-05T15:33:09Z")
The 13 year old did not claim that Polanski shook her hand, and Polanski did not admit that he shook the 13 year old’s hand, therefore it was not rape. You seem to believe that a 44 year old man drugging and annally penetrating a 13 year old girl with his penis is rape. What you don’t understand is that rape is all about handshakes. If a man shakes hands with a woman, or even just extends his hand toward a woman as if her were going to shake her hand, then he is raping that woman. [I hope this clarifies for you what is and what is not rape.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/search.php?searchid=11538031) ---
**Author:** ![iiandyiiii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iiandyiiii/32/7924_2.png) [@iiandyiiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iiandyiiii)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2014, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-explain-to-me-why-roman-polanski-isnt-a-bad-guy/703126/168 "2014-11-05T16:00:32Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > I believe morally, an aspiring actress who would consent to a semi-nude photo shoot alone with a movie executive who she obviously wants to work for, would be more than willing to let the movie executive do just about any sexual act he wanted with her and keep quiet about it, IF she got what she wanted. I see no reason to believe this is the case. > [@](#): > > Polanski’s mistake was not offering her a lucrative contract before he screwed her. No one, not even Polanski, makes an argument anything close to this. And all of your arguments, of course, are obliterated because Polanski calls Geimer his victim. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-explain-to-me-why-roman-polanski-isnt-a-bad-guy/703126.md?page=8)