# Please, for the love of all that's holy, get the damn Marmite out of my skull! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 17, 2003, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629 "2003-11-17T02:49:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![MC\_Master\_of\_Ceremonies](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/bb73d2/32.png) [@MC\_Master\_of\_Ceremonies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MC_Master_of_Ceremonies)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2003, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629/81 "2003-11-20T00:52:37Z")
Well, they flavour it. Also as a note of caution to all you would-be marmite eaters out there, marmite has been linked to several outbreaks of the dreaded lurgy. ---
**Author:** ![Fretful\_Porpentine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fretful_porpentine/32/2873_2.png) [@Fretful\_Porpentine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fretful_Porpentine)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2003, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629/82 "2003-11-20T01:05:35Z")
I rather like Marmite, but since it’s seven bucks for a very small jar at the local gourmet shop, it’s not something I’m going to indulge in while in this country. ---
**Author:** ![g8rguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7cd45c/32.png) [@g8rguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/g8rguy)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2003, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629/83 "2003-11-20T01:16:33Z")
> [@](#): > > **it’s seven bucks for a very small jar at the local gourmet shop** Proof yet again that if you charge enough for something, no matter how odd, _someone_ will buy it. ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2003, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629/84 "2003-11-20T02:01:14Z")
Indeed - it’s a well known fact that the more exclusive the food item, the more horrifyingly awful it tastes. Though I looooove Marmite on hot buttered toast, oh yes I do. ---
**Author:** ![Doomtrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Doomtrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doomtrain)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2003, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629/85 "2003-11-20T02:35:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jjimm \* > \*\ ***BottledBlondJeanie** , no wonder you nearly barfed. you bought _Vegemite_, which is the devil’s smegma, rather than Marmite. :smack: Go back to the deli and try again with the proper stuff. \*\* Not to bring Fark cliches over, but [Admiral Ackbar] IT’S A TRAP! [/AA] ---
**Author:** ![Capt\_B.Phart](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9fc29f/32.png) [@Capt\_B.Phart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Capt_B.Phart)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2003, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629/86 "2003-11-20T02:52:11Z")
[The only real use for Vegemite!](http://www.dansdata.com/goop.htm) ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2003, 9:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629/87 "2003-11-20T09:06:18Z")
In honour of this thread, I went home last night and had hot buttered toast spread thick with Marmite. Bliss! Even my wife likes it now (many Irish people run screaming at the thought of yet another colonial atrocity being inflicted on them).l ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_Kumquat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gary\_Kumquat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Kumquat)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2003, 10:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629/88 "2003-11-20T10:58:21Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jjimm \* > \*\*In honour of this thread, I went home last night and had hot buttered toast spread thick with Marmite. Bliss! Even my wife likes it now (many Irish people run screaming at the thought of yet another colonial atrocity being inflicted on them).l \*\* I was going to, but the corner shop was out of butter and marmite has to be served on buttered toast. ---
**Author:** ![Aro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b3f665/32.png) [@Aro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aro)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2003, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629/89 "2003-11-20T12:22:02Z")
I dunno about Marmite, but I made my own peanut butter once. I bucked some KP salted into the Flora tub and then lashed it liberally on some bread. Can’t really see the appeal of it, myself. What? ---
**Author:** ![Ice\_Wolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/dfb087/32.png) [@Ice\_Wolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ice_Wolf)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2003, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629/90 "2003-11-20T13:28:34Z")
Ah, I like Marmite. It was the staple of sandwiches as I grew up. Nary a kiddie could be seen in the playground without the obligatory marmite slathered sammies (unless it was cold spaghetti sammies. Oh, the horror.) A cheese sandwich with marmite and home-grown lettuce – wondrous food, oh how I love thee. 🙂 Not sure I’ve tried Vegemite yet. Probably have. Can’t really tell the difference, it’s all the same across the slice. ---
**Author:** ![Mehitabel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8797f3/32.png) [@Mehitabel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mehitabel)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2003, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629/91 "2003-11-20T16:32:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Ice Wolf \* > \*\*Ah, I like Marmite. > > It was the staple of sandwiches as I grew up. Nary a kiddie could be seen in the playground without the obligatory marmite slathered sammies (unless it was cold spaghetti sammies. Oh, the horror.) > \*\* :eek: Makes addendum to New Zealand fantasy trip list: FOR THE LOVE OF GAWD, BRING YOUR OWN FOOD! ---
**Author:** ![scablet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/53a042/32.png) [@scablet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scablet)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2003, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629/92 "2003-11-22T23:36:44Z")
I tried Marmite for the first time today. Saw a jar at the grocery store for once and thought I’d walk on the wild side. Verdict? I like it, I really, really like it! Tried it spread really thinly across some warm Russian rye toast. Tasty. Experimented with slathering it a bit more thickly on some Saltines and enjoyed that too. It’s also good on Melba toast. As palatable as I find this British delicacy, however, my tongue is now quite parched from all this wanton Marmitery. I’ve also managed to somehow spread, smear and slather my way through a quarter of the jar in the course of an afternoon. If this turns into a fifty-dollar-a-day habit, I’m telling you, _someone_ in this thread will be held responsible… ---
**Author:** ![Palewriter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/db5fbb/32.png) [@Palewriter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Palewriter)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2003, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629/93 "2003-11-23T04:51:12Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jeff Olsen \* > \*\ ***Palewriter** , keep an eye out for olive pesto. \*\* Well, I can always buy Marmite at my local Kroger, so I don’t need any substitutes. Hey, if some people don’t like it, that’s fine with me. Maybe it’ll keep the price down. 🙂 - PW ---
**Author:** ![Mighty\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7bcc69/32.png) [@Mighty\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Girl)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2003, 4:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629/94 "2003-11-24T04:06:00Z")
Hubby and I tried to find Marmite at Magazin, a well-stocked Danish store to bring back home for a British friend. They seemed to carry every British product possible but marmite, we asked the clerk who looked at us like we had three eyes, "marmite?!” she said, “That was banned here years ago!”. Apparently some Danes have fallen ill after consuming the offensive substance and the store decided to never offer it again. Oh well… BTW, I tried it once, I didn’t find it disgusting, but neither particularly appealing. Tapenade, on the other hand… ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2003, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629/95 "2003-11-24T22:43:32Z")
Marmite must be one of the most unlikely foods from which someone could fall sick, the salt content is high enough to kill of any bacteria. I guess though the flavour could be used to hide contaminants polaced there by non-marmite-eating terrorists (you know who you are). Anyway, Friday’s Rugby proved once and for all that Marmite is superior to Vegimite 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2003, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629/96 "2003-11-24T23:22:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mighty\_Girl \* > \*\*Tapenade, on the other hand… \*\* Just bought some green olive tapenade yesterday. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2003, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629/97 "2003-11-25T00:13:20Z")
I’m betting that many of the Americans who have tried yeast extract spreads and hated them did so because they spread them far too thickly - it is incredibly strongly-flavoured and although some folks (myself included) can happily consume it from a spoon, Try it this way: Take two pieces of crisp rye toast, prop them up like a little tent on a plate and allow them to cool completely (this allows all the steamy moisture to escape and keeps the toast crispy) - now spread them liberally with unsalted butter that is _just_ soft enough to spread properly, then smear a little Marmite (for each slice, a blob no larger in size than half a peanut kernel) evenly across the butter. ---
**Author:** ![MC\_Master\_of\_Ceremonies](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/bb73d2/32.png) [@MC\_Master\_of\_Ceremonies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MC_Master_of_Ceremonies)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2003, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629/98 "2003-11-25T00:26:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Bippy the Beardless \* > \*\*Marmite must be one of the most unlikely foods from which someone could fall sick, the salt content is high enough to kill of any bacteria. I guess though the flavour could be used to hide contaminants polaced there by non-marmite-eating terrorists (you know who you are). > Anyway, Friday’s Rugby proved once and for all that Marmite is superior to Vegimite 🙂 \*\* I’m guessing that rather than being physically ill after trying it, they just fell into a general malaise after finding out that people could jar pure unadultarted evil and sell it as a spread. ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2003, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629/99 "2003-11-25T01:23:42Z")
“Darkness spreads o’er Neverland, the bedtime hour is close at hand, Jacko comes in search of boys, to play with his most special toys. and whosoever shall be found without their pants upon the ground must stand and face the rubber glove of Michael’s cruel and unholy love, the funkiest stench is in the air the sweat of prepubescent boys, and younger girls in every room are hiding from their paedo doom and though they try to stay a child they cannot hope to win their fight, for Jackson dip’s his penis in a jar of Evil Marmite” ---
**Author:** ![Mehitabel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8797f3/32.png) [@Mehitabel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mehitabel)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2003, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629/100 "2003-11-25T01:31:59Z")
The Dread Spread (oh god, I kill me) has come to Brooklyn! Look out **Biggirl!** The Key Food (a big middlebrow chain) has started stocking the stuff according to [The NYT.](http://www.nytimes.com/2003/11/23/nyregion/thecity/23crum.html) It started innocently enough, with beans in tomato sauce, then kept on going and they now also boast–if that’s the word–_microwaveable spotted dick._ :eek: Says the hapless storekeeper, “I never heard of Typhoo tea. I’m Croatian by birth. I don’t have a clue what half of this stuff is.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-for-the-love-of-all-thats-holy-get-the-damn-marmite-out-of-my-skull/213629.md?page=6)