# Please help cheer me up! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 3, 2003, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782 "2003-08-03T22:50:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![bittersweet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c57346/32.png) [@bittersweet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bittersweet)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2003, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782/1 "2003-08-03T22:50:40Z")
I need to hear a funny joke or story OR SOMETHING… I’m down in the dumps. ☹ Please? ---
**Author:** ![Zeldar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b77776/32.png) [@Zeldar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeldar)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2003, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782/2 "2003-08-03T23:04:50Z")
Twas Sunday and things were just fine As Dopers kept crowding online The messages crept And everyone wept But the hamsters kept swiggin’ their wine ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2003, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782/3 "2003-08-03T23:17:14Z")
I would provide a link for you, but the way things are set up here at work, I can’t cut and paste a URL for you. So I recommend doing a search for Halvsie the Two Legged Dog. It’s in MPSIMS, I don’t remember how long ago, more than a year for sure. I wrote the OP and it starts kinda slow, but it gets really funny when **Eve** shows up with the TV show bit. And if you don’t feel like sharing, that’s fine, but do you mind sharing what’s got you in the dumps? If you don’t want to post it publicly, but want to talk, my e-mail is available below, although I won’t be able to check it until I get home tonight close to midnight or so. ---
**Author:** ![verbenabeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c4cdca/32.png) [@verbenabeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/verbenabeast)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2003, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782/4 "2003-08-03T23:25:10Z")
yeah… well… hmmm… I’m really more of a “banter” kinda guy… but we’ll try a joke here… let’s see… A rabbi, a catholic priest, 2 nuns, and a duck walk into a bar… the bartender says “What is this? Some Kinda Joke?” Yeah, I know… ---
**Author:** ![Lsura](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7993a0/32.png) [@Lsura](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lsura)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2003, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782/5 "2003-08-03T23:35:38Z")
Just for **Crunchy Frog** [Halvsie](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=51807&highlight=Halvsie) ---
**Author:** ![bittersweet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c57346/32.png) [@bittersweet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bittersweet)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2003, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782/6 "2003-08-03T23:36:57Z")
Zeldar: had a visual of my pet hamsters from years and years ago, drinking wine out of little carafes. Crunch: I appreciate it. Will do. verbena: reminds me of the joke~ Two guys walk into a bar after the first one did it, the second should have known better. Thanks…y’all are good people. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2003, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782/7 "2003-08-03T23:37:03Z")
[http://www.usd.edu/~burlache/squirrels/](http://www.usd.edu/~burlache/squirrels/) [http://now2000.com/fortune/index.shtml](http://now2000.com/fortune/index.shtml) [http://www.d-zyn.com/gresmedical/#postextraction](http://www.d-zyn.com/gresmedical/#postextraction) [http://www.paganlibrary.com/humor/church\_of\_beaver\_cleaver.php](http://www.paganlibrary.com/humor/church_of_beaver_cleaver.php) [http://www.tinyninjatheater.com/](http://www.tinyninjatheater.com/) [http://golem.plush.org/](http://golem.plush.org/) [http://www.baetzler.de/humor/groucho\_marxism.html](http://www.baetzler.de/humor/groucho_marxism.html) [http://www.lnsemsf.com/](http://www.lnsemsf.com/) And, if you are _seriously_ bored… [http://drew.corrupt.net/lp/index.html](http://drew.corrupt.net/lp/index.html) ---
**Author:** ![bittersweet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c57346/32.png) [@bittersweet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bittersweet)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2003, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782/8 "2003-08-03T23:42:25Z")
the block structure porn made me chuckle. what does that say about me as a person? /shudder ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2003, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782/9 "2003-08-03T23:52:08Z")
**Lsura** demonstrates just another reason why she make me feel all squooshy inside. Aside from my insides being naturally squooshy, that is. ---
**Author:** ![verbenabeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c4cdca/32.png) [@verbenabeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/verbenabeast)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2003, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782/10 "2003-08-03T23:57:35Z")
oh, my… the creator of that site needs serious psychiatric help! ---
**Author:** ![verbenabeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c4cdca/32.png) [@verbenabeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/verbenabeast)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2003, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782/11 "2003-08-04T02:32:32Z")
Q. How does a Denver Broncos fan find a sheep in tall grass? A. Very satisfying. sorry ---
**Author:** ![ccwaterback](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/df705f/32.png) [@ccwaterback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ccwaterback)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2003, 2:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782/12 "2003-08-04T02:54:42Z")
[http://www.hampsterdance2.com/hampsterdance2.html](http://www.hampsterdance2.com/hampsterdance2.html) ---
**Author:** ![bittersweet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c57346/32.png) [@bittersweet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bittersweet)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2003, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782/13 "2003-08-04T03:00:06Z")
Okay, I think we have a winnah. And I thought the _original_ Hampster Dance was funny…hee! ---
**Author:** ![Zoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a4c791/32.png) [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2003, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782/14 "2003-08-04T03:06:14Z")
How about SDMB’s Page-O-Flames? [http://fathom.org/teemingmillions/pof-oneliners.adp](http://fathom.org/teemingmillions/pof-oneliners.adp) ---
**Author:** ![bittersweet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c57346/32.png) [@bittersweet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bittersweet)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2003, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782/15 "2003-08-04T03:17:21Z")
wow. I may be using one or two of those soon… ---
**Author:** ![Rabid\_Squirrel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Rabid\_Squirrel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rabid_Squirrel)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2003, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782/16 "2003-08-04T03:47:48Z")
In the same vein as block porn, is [Fruit Pr0n](http://vegetable.0rgy.net/) And [this gem](http://www.iidb.org/vbb/showthread.php?threadid=56995&perpage=25&pagenumber=1) that’s been floating around before. ---
**Author:** ![Rabid\_Squirrel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Rabid\_Squirrel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rabid_Squirrel)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2003, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782/17 "2003-08-04T03:47:49Z")
In the same vein as block porn, is [Fruit Pr0n](http://vegetable.0rgy.net/) And [this gem](http://www.iidb.org/vbb/showthread.php?threadid=56995&perpage=25&pagenumber=1) that’s been floating around before. ---
**Author:** ![Rabid\_Squirrel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Rabid\_Squirrel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rabid_Squirrel)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2003, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782/18 "2003-08-04T03:50:54Z")
Erk. Stupid duplicating magic hamsters :smack: ---
**Author:** ![ccwaterback](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/df705f/32.png) [@ccwaterback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ccwaterback)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2003, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782/19 "2003-08-04T05:40:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Rabid\_Squirrel \* > \*\* > [this gem](http://www.iidb.org/vbb/showthread.php?threadid=56995&perpage=25&pagenumber=1) that’s been floating around before. \*\* Man, that has to go down as one of the funniest things I have ever seen on the net. This one is definitely going into my Spam Hall of Fame™. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Chavardz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/91b2a8/32.png) [@Chavardz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chavardz)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2003, 6:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782/20 "2003-08-04T06:04:04Z")
In the same vein as block porn try [www.legodeath.com](http://www.legodeath.com) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-help-cheer-me-up/192782.md?page=2)