# Please leave me out of your kink, or a horrifying breach of public restroom etiquette **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 28, 2023, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247 "2023-08-28T21:43:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2023, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247/21 "2023-08-29T00:56:34Z")
I’m going to guess teenaged store employee, maybe infatuated with another employee or something. Maybe the employee saw the other employee do something that _moved_ him. “Oh yeah, put that bread on the shelf… Reach for it…” ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Drake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Dr.Drake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Drake)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2023, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247/22 "2023-08-29T01:01:01Z")
I always thought the code was that you politely pretended that whatever was happening in the next stall, wasn’t. I don’t think self-satisfaction is any less gross than pooping, which is, after all, that the stall is there for; its sound is no less disturbing than the sounds that sometimes come with pooing. Now, if the person were obviously taking your presence into account, that would be objectionable, and illegal. If it were me in your position, I would have just continued about my business, got up, washed my hands, and left as normal, leaving Wankeroo to finish or not on his own. ---
**Author:** ![chela](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chela/32/21582_2.png) [@chela](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chela)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2023, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247/23 "2023-08-29T01:09:55Z")
> [@Chef\_Troy](#): > > made a pit stop at my local grocery store yesterday. The first stall was disgusting, so I went into the second one and took a seat. I was on my phone and not making any noise, which is something I wish I could change. I wish I could change opening this thread dude you went local to the fucking food store to their public and second most disgusting stall and took out yer telephone. Fuck off ---
**Author:** ![Moriarty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moriarty/32/49_2.png) [@Moriarty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moriarty)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2023, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247/24 "2023-08-29T01:21:18Z")
Perhaps he was in need of writing a secret code, and had to resort to old school methods of fulfilling his mission. > **[British spies used semen as invisible ink during WWI](https://gizmodo.com/british-spies-used-semen-as-invisible-ink-during-wwi-1614656875)** > > British spies were experimenting with all kinds of invisible inks during the first World War. In 1915, one spy was quite excited to discover a rather handy way to create one. His secret ingredient? Semen. _This brave patriot is trying to save America from evildoers_, and all you can do is mock and sneer? Have you no sense of patriotism? **Why do you hate America**? ---
**Author:** ![Chef\_Troy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/85f322/32.png) [@Chef\_Troy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chef_Troy)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2023, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247/25 "2023-08-29T01:22:07Z")
> [@chela](#): > > > [@Chef\_Troy](#): > > > > made a pit stop at my local grocery store yesterday. The first stall was disgusting, so I went into the second one and took a seat. I was on my phone and not making any noise, which is something I wish I could change. > > I wish I could change opening this thread dude you went local to the fucking food store to their public and second most disgusting stall and took out yer telephone. > > Fuck off Let me clarify. I wasn’t TALKING on the phone, I was just looking at it, because there wasn’t any good graffiti and I didn’t have a pen. I would never CALL someone from a bathroom stall. I’m not a barbarian any more than Stratocaster is. Oh, and Bobot – he appeared to be in his forties, weatherbeaten and not an employee. I saw him as I fled the scene a few seconds after he left and recognized his boots. ---
**Author:** ![Chef\_Troy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/85f322/32.png) [@Chef\_Troy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chef_Troy)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2023, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247/26 "2023-08-29T01:25:52Z")
> [@Dr.Drake](#): > > I always thought the code was that you politely pretended that whatever was happening in the next stall, wasn’t. Pretending nothing was happening in that stall is exactly what I was doing. I stayed put until he left because a), I didn’t want to embarrass the guy, and b) I REALLY didn’t want to make eye contact with him if we both exited at the same time. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2023, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247/27 "2023-08-29T01:57:47Z")
> [@Spice\_Weasel](#): > > I can’t imagine how anyone can masturbate in a bathroom much less a public one. A public bathroom, okay–but a private one? I’d figure it’s the second-most common room. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Drake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Dr.Drake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Drake)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2023, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247/28 "2023-08-29T02:00:10Z")
Ah, fair enough. I guess it comes down to whether you’d be able to pretend you didn’t know what he was doing. It just seems awful to be a captive audience to it. ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2023, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247/29 "2023-08-29T02:11:12Z")
> [@Chef\_Troy](#): > > tl,dr; someone audibly masturbated to completion in the stall next to mine in a public bathroom while I tried to pretend I wasn’t there. Would you say he was masturbating like a mother fuck? > [@"Woooo!!! I AM MASTURBATING LIKE A MOTHER FUCK!!!"](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/woooo-i-am-masturbating-like-a-mother-fuck/231264): > > I was leaving work tonight, sometime around 11:00 pm, when I heard this. I work at one of the finest hotels in Sacramento California, aww heck, I’ll just say it, I work at the Hyatt Regency (it is where das Governator is currently living). I was leaving work, walking down one of the back halls, when I heard someone yell: “WOOOOO!!! I AM MASTURBATING LIKE A MOTHER FUCK!!!” I do not know who said this. I do not know why. I do not know if it was the punchline to a joke. I do not know if it … ---
**Author:** ![superwombat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superwombat/32/16616_2.png) [@superwombat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/superwombat)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2023, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247/30 "2023-08-29T02:41:46Z")
> **[https://preview.redd.it/u7g5g9kgilu41.jpg?auto=webp&s=3f3060b90aa306a8bb3111...](https://preview.redd.it/u7g5g9kgilu41.jpg?auto=webp&s=3f3060b90aa306a8bb31113a8aadbc6ac2f3004f)** ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2023, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247/31 "2023-08-29T03:31:03Z")
> [@El\_DeLuxo](#): > > Believe me Because you would know, right? 😉 And to the OP: I work at a high school in Beijing. One morning, I went into the loo, knocked on the door to the stall with the “western commode”, got no answer, pushed the door open, and saw one of the students rubbing one out. If you’re going to do such a thing in a public loo, _lock the stall door_! @superwombat That cartoon reminds me of why my friends and I stopped going to Delta of Venus restaurant in Davis, California. I saw one of the cooks come out of the stall after he was obviously dropping a deuce and he walked out of the restroom without washing his hands. I loudly informed my party of that fact and, without any further discussion, we all up and left. ---
**Author:** ![Stratocaster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stratocaster/32/16393_2.png) [@Stratocaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stratocaster)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2023, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247/32 "2023-08-29T04:21:45Z")
> [@Chef\_Troy](#): > > I’m not a barbarian any more than Stratocaster is. Indeed. ---
**Author:** ![Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eyebrows_0f_doom/32/3119_2.png) [@Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eyebrows_0f_Doom)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2023, 4:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247/33 "2023-08-29T04:34:55Z")
> [@chela](#): > > you went local to the fucking food store to their public and second most disgusting stall Can someone translate this to English please? ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2023, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247/34 "2023-08-29T04:39:26Z")
> [@El\_DeLuxo](#): > > The Mystery Masturbator probably wasn’t trying to involve you in his sausage jostling, but was just really horny (like maybe he just now saw something spectacularly spank-worthy out there and just had to go whack the whanger right now and damn the torpedoes) and didn’t pay any attention to the other stall or its possible occupied status once he found one open for his biz. Believe me, if the stroking stranger had wanted or meant to involve you in anything choad related, he’d almost certainly have made that desire or intent known pretty quickly and plainly. You have a great gift for euphemisms. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2023, 6:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247/35 "2023-08-29T06:47:49Z")
Hmmm? Let me try: “You went the grocery store, in your neighborhood, and used the restroom in the cleanest stall available…” ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2023, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247/36 "2023-08-29T15:28:27Z")
It just seems super uncomfortable! But I am not a dude. ---
**Author:** ![Chef\_Troy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/85f322/32.png) [@Chef\_Troy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chef_Troy)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2023, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247/37 "2023-08-29T16:19:02Z")
> [@Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](#): > > > [@chela](#): > > > > you went local to the fucking food store to their public and second most disgusting stall > > Can someone translate this to English please? I think Chela was under the impression that I was having a phone conversation while using a bathroom and was rightly disapproving of that sort of behavior, although that wasn’t what I was doing. Probably it was supposed to read “… you went to the local fucking food store, [went into] their public and second-most-disgusting stall, and…” I would have to agree that the stall I used was the second-grossest stall in that bathroom, but given that there were only two, the data isn’t particularly useful. It’s like saying the person who won a two-person footrace came in second to last. For the record, it was not disgusting at all, which technically made it the second-most-disgusting stall available. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2023, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247/38 "2023-08-29T16:42:27Z")
The comment struck me as completely out of left field. I couldn’t make heads or tails of it. Anyway, as for masturbating in the bathroom being unusual (not a public one, but I private one) that definitely was a “tell me you’re not a guy without telling me you’re not a guy.” Bathroom, shower, bedroom—all typical places when you’re a teenager. It’s not chronic constipation that has pubescent boys hogging the bathroom. ---
**Author:** ![Akaj](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/akaj/32/145_2.png) [@Akaj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Akaj)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2023, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247/39 "2023-08-29T17:10:41Z")
> [@Chef\_Troy](#): > > he appeared to be in his forties, weatherbeaten and not an employee. I saw him as I fled the scene a few seconds after he left and recognized his boots. So not a teenager, but sufficiently motivated to rub one out standing up in a disgusting men’s room stall. Might be a kink after all. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2023, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247/40 "2023-08-29T18:03:04Z")
No scented candles? No John Tesh music playing softly in the background? No Labatts in a wine glass? No back issues of Glamour laid out? The man truly was an animal. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-leave-me-out-of-your-kink-or-a-horrifying-breach-of-public-restroom-etiquette/989247.md?page=3)