# Please spoil Xena for me. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 23, 2003, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620 "2003-03-23T21:38:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2003, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620/1 "2003-03-23T21:38:22Z")
While in the U.K. last week I had insomnia all night and channel surfed the night away. One show I caught part of was Xena. While I know loosely what the show was about, I don’t think I ever watched an entire show, but hey, it was better than nothing. In the end Gabriella and Xena were crucified by Ceasar. Since it is unlikely I’ll see Xena ever again, can someone tell me if this was the last episode? Is this how Xena ended? Thanks. ---
**Author:** ![Icerigger](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/icerigger/32/432_2.png) [@Icerigger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Icerigger)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2003, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620/2 "2003-03-23T21:50:22Z")
This will answer all of your questions. [http://www.whoosh.org/epguide/epguide.html](http://www.whoosh.org/epguide/epguide.html) ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2003, 3:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620/3 "2003-03-24T03:51:55Z")
It was fiction, friend. It was only a TV show. How’s that for spoilage? ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2003, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620/4 "2003-03-24T07:01:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Khadaji \* > **While in the U.K. last week I had insomnia all night and channel surfed the night away. One show I caught part of was Xena. While I know loosely what the show was about, I don’t think I ever watched an entire show, but hey, it was better than nothing. In the end Gabriella and Xena were crucified by Ceasar. Since it is unlikely I’ll see Xena ever again, can someone tell me if this was the last episode? Is this how Xena ended?** No. This was the last episode of season four (_Ides of March_). There are two more seasons after that. And it’s Gabrielle, not Gabriella. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Elvis_Rojo)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2003, 1:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620/5 "2003-03-24T13:32:14Z")
Yeah, there were at least two more seasons after this one (possibly three, I can’t remember). If it’s the right crucifixion (I believe there were a few, but many happened in flashbacks), they get rescued by Eli and an amazon, who then perform some ritual to bring them back to life. I think in the meantime, they battle in heaven as angels/demons for a bit, and then come back to life. Xena ends up with amnesia and is super pacive, but eventually, they take her chacrum to some alter where she combines her broken one with another one (which has the power to kill gods, mind you), nulifies the other’s special abilities, but gets her memory back, her fighting capabilities, and a whole new chacrum that’s capable of splitting in two and resembles a yin yang when whole. Eventually, she gets pregnant through emaculate conception, and there’s a big plot point where the baby is destined to bring about the death of the gods. So, the gods go on a manhunt, Xena and Gabrielle hand the baby over to the Roman emperor Alexander, I think, and fake all their deaths. Ares puts Xena and Gabrielle in some sort of ice chamber to keep them looking good forever, but they wake up 20 years in the future and discover that Xena’s daughter, Eve, has become some super evil Roman despot who slaughters people for the hell of it and is played by a real skank bitch. Once they realize her true identity, they try to rehabilitate her, and in the process, she kills Joxer. I forget why, but after some huge epic battle, she sees the light, and then flees to the desert, where Xena, Gabrielle, and Eve meet the “Cult of Eli” and Eve gets baptised into the cult of love. At this point, Xena’s visited by an angel of God, who gives her the power to kill gods as long as Eve is alive, and when the gods show up to try and kill Eve, Xena kills a bunch of them. As things progress, Xena goes to Mt. Olympus and kills Athena and, well, pretty much ever other god aside from Ares (who gives up his immortality to save Gabrielle and Eve’s lives) and Aphrodite. From then on out, the show gets kinda stupid, with Eve playing the part of stupid whinny “I won’t fight anymore” skank, and the producers butcher virtually ever other mythology out there as Gabrielle and Xena travel the world. The majority of the last season has them dealing with the Norse gods, getting Lucifer to become evil and thus become Satan, battling with Angels some more, and a few more trists with the Romans. The final couple episodes took place in China, and the final episode was one hell of a let down. Things got really silly towards the end, but overall, the show was still really enjoyable, and the “Future” episode was great. The lack of Joxer made me sad, though. ---
**Author:** ![Shalmanese](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shalmanese](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shalmanese)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2003, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620/6 "2003-03-24T13:55:43Z")
uh… I guess that was marginally more intelligible than the Dragonball Z synopsis someone put up here a while ago… ---
**Author:** ![FriarTed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/friarted/32/1052_2.png) [@FriarTed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FriarTed)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2003, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620/7 "2003-03-24T15:23:53Z")
the “Twilight of the Old Gods/Coming of the One God of Love” plot should have been followed through, sooooo… Xena, Eve, Gabrielle, Ares & Aphrodite band together to assist a young Jewish expectant couple get them safely to their destination in spite of dark gods & evil kings trying to prevent the woman from having her child safely. It all ends happily at the traditional Nativity scene with the final scene being X & G finally moving in for the ki- ROLL CREDITS ---
**Author:** ![Zumpel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/bb73d2/32.png) [@Zumpel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zumpel)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2003, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620/8 "2003-03-24T15:30:47Z")
Ok, you asked for it: She’s a man. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Elvis_Rojo)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2003, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620/9 "2003-03-24T16:09:42Z")
Sounds nice, **FriarTed** , but Hercules already dealt with the “Getting the expectant Jewish couple to Jerusalem safe from evil hordes” plotline for one of their Christmas episodes in one of the later seasons. Aoles had visions and was guided to them, and the two went on to protect them from Herod’s hordes. Gotta love those shows, no mind for continuity or time whatsoever! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Bomzaway](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e480ec/32.png) [@Bomzaway](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bomzaway)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2003, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620/10 "2003-03-24T16:20:46Z")
I’d love to spoil Xena! Oh wait, what do you mean by “spoil”? ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2003, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620/11 "2003-03-24T19:15:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by FriarTed \* > \*\*the “Twilight of the Old Gods/Coming of the One God of Love” plot should have been followed through, sooooo… > > Xena, Eve, Gabrielle, Ares & Aphrodite band together to assist a young Jewish expectant couple get them safely to their destination in spite of dark gods & evil kings trying to prevent the woman from having her child safely. It all ends happily at the traditional Nativity scene with the final scene being X & G finally moving in for the ki- ROLL CREDITS \*\* FriarTed, no offense, but this would suck royally. However… Would it have fucking killed them to allow one final, unambiguous, romantic kiss as Xena and Gabrielle watch the sun set together in _Friend In Need II_? ---
**Author:** ![FriarTed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/friarted/32/1052_2.png) [@FriarTed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FriarTed)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2003, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620/12 "2003-03-24T19:51:29Z")
Priceguy- how about if they had the full kiss AT the Nativity? and then showed a baby hand stick up from the manger & give a thumbs-up? _G_ THEY’D GET LETTERS!!! BUT WHO CARES??? THAT’S THE LAST EPISODE! El Elvis- I know about the Hercules Christmas episode & also at the end of the Xena Winter Solstice episode- X&G give their donkey to a young couple with a baby as a star shines overhead. So what? She also helped David kill Goliath the month before - was crucified by Julius Caesar, struggled with Augustus for her daughter, & defeated Caligula. Time & space mean nothing to Xena- NOTHING! _L_ ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2003, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620/13 "2003-03-25T07:26:56Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by FriarTed \* > \*\*Priceguy- > > how about if they had the full kiss AT the Nativity?\*\* It’s not the full kiss I want, necessarily. It would just have been the perfect ending to the last episode (which I liked, actually; I’m apparently in a minority of one). > [@](#): > > \*\*and then showed a baby hand stick up from the manger & give a thumbs-up? > > THEY’D GET LETTERS!!! BUT WHO CARES??? THAT’S THE LAST EPISODE!\*\* Once again: this would suck royally. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Elvis_Rojo)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2003, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620/14 "2003-03-25T13:33:42Z")
I didn’t actually mind them killing Xena off, I just didn’t like the way they did it, and I didn’t like the fact that it happened in China fighting some Chinese Demon. The whole thing was spawned by Greek Mythology, and there were still some Greek myths and legends that niether show touched on, so I feel like her final episode should have ended where it started, that’s all. I agree, a nice little kiss “goodbye” would have been nice as Xena’s soul moved on while they were on the mountaintop overlooking the sunset, but dispite all the “We’re soulmates” stuff they kept spouting off, the producers still won’t admit that either of them are lesbians or lovers. Just a big cocktease (or, in this case, cooze tickler?). ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2003, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620/15 "2003-03-25T13:37:04Z")
El Elvis Rojo: The producers don’t, but… [http://www.charani.org/XenaNews11403Pg1.html](http://www.charani.org/XenaNews11403Pg1.html). Beware of spoilers. ---
**Author:** ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2003, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620/16 "2003-03-25T14:37:06Z")
_Xena_ didn’t end with the crucifixion of Xena and Gabrielle, but maybe it should have. The show had been going downhill for a while, and just became embarassing afterwards. I stopped watching it unless I happened to be around in someone else’s room when it was on, and this is from someone who used to tape every episode. I did make it a point to watch the final two-part episode, but I wish I hadn’t. ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2003, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620/17 "2003-03-25T15:27:56Z")
I thought the final episode was set in Japan. But then I didn’t really understand the final episode so I could be mistaken. I watched the final seasons mostly out of inertia. I gotta say I did like the second musical episode a lot and wish they’d released a soundtrack CD. And the guy who played Virgil was a total hottie who made slogging through some of the dreary Eve episodes. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Elvis_Rojo)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2003, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620/18 "2003-03-25T15:42:11Z")
IT could have been Japan. Like many others, by this time, I was just watching it because it was the final episode. It seemed more likely to me that they’d be in China than Japan, but I could be mistaken. Again, though, I just feel jipped because it wasn’t in Greece. ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2003, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620/19 "2003-03-25T15:58:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Otto \* > **I thought the final episode was set in Japan. But then I didn’t really understand the final episode so I could be mistaken.** No, you’re not. It was set in Japa. See, in the Xenaverse, you create the names of Oriental countries by removing the last letter of their real-world names. China becomes Chin, Japan becomes Japa. ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2003, 6:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620/20 "2003-03-26T06:05:00Z")
Good god… I always like _Xena_ and _Hercules_ but was never a totally devoted fan and this thread sort of makes me happy about that. My brain hurts. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/please-spoil-xena-for-me/163620.md?page=2)