I was listening today to a CBC Radio One interview with the director of the Global Strategic Maple Syrup Reserve, who said that that was not the only warehouse, and that it held a total of $30 million of syrup, and that not all of it was taken. My impression is that the stockkeepers were caught with their pants down by this.
If this was a serious question, the owner - Anthony DeAngelis, aka The Salad-Oil King - had a series of underground pipes that would pump oil from one tank to another. It was, of course, a scam. Actually, several scams.
Damn, those bears are good swimmers
“If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down?
We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.”
~Jack Handy
The guy sounds like a real sap.
Thirty million dollars in maple syrup weighs 10,500 tons. Sixty men would take twelve days to load it onto 200 trucks. Now, at the most, they’re going to have two hours before the Mounties move in and make them put it back.
Really, if they had any brains, they’d break into the warehouse and detonate a nuclear weapon. The entire maple syrup supply of Canada would be radioactive for fifty-seven years. There would be economic chaos, and dry pancakes, in the West, and the value of their syrup increases many times.
Are you sure about that? 10,500 tons is 21 million pounds. That works out to $1.43/pound, which is a bit low for maple syrup, unless we’re *really *getting shafted here in California…
I think you’re losing the plot here. Man has climbed Mount Everest, gone to the bottom of the ocean. He’s fired rockets at the Moon, split the atom, achieved miracles in every field of human endeavor… except crime!
This is easily the best thread we’ve had in a while.
Somehow, we are going to get a Canadian Empire out of this. Somehow.
It wasn’t me.
I wonder if the missing maple syrup was never there in the first place?
Buddy What-'is-Name gets paid for ten units of syrup by the reserve, but only delivers nine units, and gives a kick-back to the boys at the reserve who received the delivery, wrote it up as ten, and placed an extra empty unit container on the racks.
That, or it’s them! giant nuclear ants.
Dry pancakes? Nah, we’d just have a happy glow while eating our maple syrup saturated pancakes.
You stole this from the cement deliveries to The Big O.
Yup. This afternoon I was chatting on the phone with a friend in Trois-Rivières about the construction corruption inquiry.
Why Does Canada Have a Strategic Maple Syrup Reserve?
I must say, The Atlantic has done a masterful job of disinformation with this report.
So you’re saying this was some kind of sex crime?
This is the funniest story I’ve seen since “Santorum Comes From Behind in Three Way.”
Now I’m picturing some NASA-like control room to control and monitor the international flow of maple syrup. And they have Emergency Response Teams to interdict the illegal syrup trade.
And there are Supervillains doing their worst to steal or destroy the world’s supply.
And then there Team Canada – World Maple Police.
Yeh, that was started by a guy named Mike Pearson at the end of WWII. Funding for it comes secretly from the UN.
I have GOT to draw this.