# Politely hurrying up someone who takes too long to get to the point **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 22, 2019, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/politely-hurrying-up-someone-who-takes-too-long-to-get-to-the-point/842160 "2019-10-22T22:59:48Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2019, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/politely-hurrying-up-someone-who-takes-too-long-to-get-to-the-point/842160/61 "2019-10-24T18:53:29Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > It does depend on the circumstances. My husband does this. When asking him a question for which I need a quick answer - and not a 60 page dissertation of an answer, with background, and exceptions - or a discourse of some theoretical future state, I say “In 200 words or less, I need to know…” I taught some of his coworkers this trick. He’s self aware enough to know that he doesn’t give short answers, so the reminder that you are looking for succinent helps. > > When its a long rambling story I tend to just listen with just one ear - especially at home because as Cardigan said, the relationship is different - unless I need to do something in which case I interrupt with “I need to.” Sometimes, I need to run to the bathroom - which is a great excuse to end a conversation and it isn’t like most people will follow you and keep talking. With cell phones set to vibrate “I need to take this call” works. > > The most annoying thing my husband will do is talk at me. He needs to work out his thoughts verbally, and since he works from home, I’ll be the mannequin he directs his voice to. Its taken two years of working at home, but I’ve actually stated “sometimes you just use me to talk at. When you are doing that, I’m not really listening, and I’ll continue to look at my phone, or read, or count on my knitting…if you really need me to listen and need my input, you need to tell me, because I might not pick up on it. I don’t mind being talked at - I understand that is part of how you work things out, but I really don’t need to dedicate mental cycles or attention to it” He agreed that often he is just talking at me, and me treating it as background noise was fine, and he’d get less annoyed when he talked to me and I wasn’t listening under the belief I was being talked at again. > > I have a friend with a loud voice and a tendency to dominate conversations. She’s married to a man with a loud voice and a tendency to dominate conversations. They are both better either one on one, when they can hear themselves - or in really large groups - like parties - where its normal to talk to someone for ten minutes and move on. They are both horrible in small groups, where they need to respond to every statement or story - often with long rambling stories of their own. Don’t go out to dinner and sit next to either of them in a group of eight or ten - pick the other side of the table. So, in other words, your husband and a friend do it too. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2019, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/politely-hurrying-up-someone-who-takes-too-long-to-get-to-the-point/842160/62 "2019-10-24T22:26:15Z")
> [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](#): > > So, in other words, your husband and a friend do it too. > > 😃 Oh, that wasn’t a long rambling explanation. That was a mere 465 words. You need to get into tens of thousands to compete in the droning narrative Olympics. ---
**Author:** ![Toxgoddess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f08c70/32.png) [@Toxgoddess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Toxgoddess)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2019, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/politely-hurrying-up-someone-who-takes-too-long-to-get-to-the-point/842160/63 "2019-10-24T22:46:38Z")
“While we’re young…” ---
**Author:** ![Toxgoddess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f08c70/32.png) [@Toxgoddess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Toxgoddess)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2019, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/politely-hurrying-up-someone-who-takes-too-long-to-get-to-the-point/842160/64 "2019-10-24T22:50:02Z")
We bowl with some people like this. They have a constant stream-of-consciouness verbal overflow going and do not ever listen to anything anyone else has to say. If you try to interject, they speak over you, or ignore you and keep going. Circumstances say we have to spend a few hours a week with them, and just put up with it. I amuse myself by saying random nonsensical things to see if they notice. They never notice. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2019, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/politely-hurrying-up-someone-who-takes-too-long-to-get-to-the-point/842160/65 "2019-10-24T23:16:50Z")
My neighbor, a nice guy, has a tape recorder embedded somewhere in his chest area. He has a whole box of tapes concealed somewhere on his person that he can access at will. I know this because his stories never vary, even by one word. They are long, pointless and meandering, but they are identical every time he tells them. And most of them are about pharmacy school. Oh! The wacky times had there! He usually can’t stay away for more than a week without coming over to “update” us on whatever he’s been up to, including the back stories for all of his little tales. He’s like a real-life Abe Simpson. And nothing, but nothing, derails him. Interrupt him and he hits ‘pause’, while his eyes do a sort of jittery dance, and when you’re done, he hits ‘play’ and picks up exactly where he left off. Someday I’m going to find those tapes yes I am and when i do i’ma gonna burn them burn them so bright precious until its allapileofmeltedgoo… ---
**Author:** ![Maddodge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/edb3f5/32.png) [@Maddodge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maddodge)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2019, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/politely-hurrying-up-someone-who-takes-too-long-to-get-to-the-point/842160/66 "2019-10-25T00:07:44Z")
I never have this problem because i cannot hide my expressions.my face screams get to the point before my eyes roll out of my head. ---
**Author:** ![Aspidistra](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspidistra/32/3894_2.png) [@Aspidistra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspidistra)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2019, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/politely-hurrying-up-someone-who-takes-too-long-to-get-to-the-point/842160/67 "2019-10-25T03:44:12Z")
> [@Toxgoddess](#): > > “While we’re young…” Some of us can’t use that these days :o ---
**Author:** ![squeetaleta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bbce88/32.png) [@squeetaleta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/squeetaleta)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2019, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/politely-hurrying-up-someone-who-takes-too-long-to-get-to-the-point/842160/68 "2019-10-25T04:27:03Z")
Sometimes you just have to open your biggest bag of offensive and salt that shit up good, because no matter how you say it you’re still gonna be an asshole. Sent from my A574BL using Tapatalk ---
**Author:** ![Toxgoddess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f08c70/32.png) [@Toxgoddess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Toxgoddess)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2019, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/politely-hurrying-up-someone-who-takes-too-long-to-get-to-the-point/842160/69 "2019-10-25T17:34:00Z")
> [@Aspidistra](#): > > Some of us can’t use that these days :o But the older you are, the more of a bite it has!! Implies you were young when they started. 😉 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/politely-hurrying-up-someone-who-takes-too-long-to-get-to-the-point/842160.md?page=3)