# Poll: Ask the three eyed stuid fucking asshole
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424
**Category:** The BBQ Pit
**Created:** [February 7, 2003, 8:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424 "2003-02-07T08:37:02Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@levdrakon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/levdrakon)
#### Post date: [February 7, 2003, 8:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424/1 "2003-02-07T08:37:02Z")
Where do you jerk offs get off? Who the fuck cares what you think? Why in the hell should I care?
Poll: If you had a hang nail & a dibibuxialain from the planet bored-fuck-sticks told you he/she/it/he-she-it would give you the optimum bus schedule to get from the 7-11 down your street to the stupid ass Wholesale Foods four blocks down the street where you can only get spirulina GM modified wheat free face slop would you take it? Who gives a fuck?
Gimme some relevant context. I hate polls. Give me some context that means something. It’s not black or white, not square or circle. Don’t ask me if i’d cross the street if some one one the other side of the street was wearing a purple beret.
Ooh, ooh. Would you go to space? How the fuck do I know? Are there some disgusting space aliens waiting to eat me as soon as I get there? Will my going there lead to the betterment of mankind for the next 10,000 years?
I really hate your if/or yes/no polls. I hate multiple guess questions. Give me a space to fill in “it depends on this…” Assholes.
\
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### Author:  [@Kamandi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamandi)
#### Post date: [February 7, 2003, 8:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424/2 "2003-02-07T08:48:12Z")
Mom?
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### Author:  [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)
#### Post date: [February 7, 2003, 8:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424/3 "2003-02-07T08:53:13Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by levdrakon \*
> \*\*
> Ooh, ooh. Would you go to space? How the fuck do I know? Are there some disgusting space aliens waiting to eat me as soon as I get there? _Will my going there lead to the betterment of mankind for the next 10,000 years?_
>
> \*\*
(My italics)
I have nothing more to add though. The question answers itself.
😃
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### Author:  [@levdrakon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/levdrakon)
#### Post date: [February 7, 2003, 8:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424/4 "2003-02-07T08:54:07Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Kamandi \*
> \*\*Mom? \*\*
Go to bed!
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### Author:  [@Ice\_Wolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ice_Wolf)
#### Post date: [February 7, 2003, 8:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424/5 "2003-02-07T08:57:25Z")
Ah, drunken rants. Pure poetry … 😃
Gotta say, tho’ – your choice of poll questions sound interesting. Be a blast if someone took one or two up and made threads of 'em for real.
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### Author:  [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)
#### Post date: [February 7, 2003, 10:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424/6 "2003-02-07T10:26:15Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Ice Wolf \*
> \*\*Ah, drunken rants. Pure poetry … 😃
> \*\*
Not ‘Pure’…only 70% proof.
😃
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### Author:  [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)
#### Post date: [February 7, 2003, 10:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424/7 "2003-02-07T10:40:56Z")
Too much cheap gin too late at night.
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### Author:  [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)
#### Post date: [February 7, 2003, 10:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424/8 "2003-02-07T10:54:02Z")
> [@](#):
>
> only 70% proof.
As an alcoholic, I take umbrage with your abusement of the alcohol content system. Is it 70 percent alcohol by volume, or is it 70 proof?
70 proof would be 35% alcohol by volume, and 70% would be 140 proof.
Fuckin’ A. Buncha sober lightweights that don’t know the difference between a Smirnoff Ice and Bacardi 151…
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### Author:  [@Steve\_Wright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_Wright)
#### Post date: [February 7, 2003, 11:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424/9 "2003-02-07T11:10:25Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by SPOOFE \*
> \*\* Buncha sober lightweights that don’t know the difference between a Smirnoff Ice and Bacardi 151… \*\*
If you can tell the difference, you’re not drunk enough.
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### Author:  [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)
#### Post date: [February 7, 2003, 11:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424/10 "2003-02-07T11:12:51Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by levdrakon \*
> \*\*Gimme some relevant context. \*\*
Back atcha, dude.
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### Author:  [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)
#### Post date: [February 7, 2003, 11:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424/11 "2003-02-07T11:53:43Z")
My god. A planet where radioactive fish evolved from man!
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### Author:  [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)
#### Post date: [February 7, 2003, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424/12 "2003-02-07T14:30:56Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by levdrakon \*
> **Poll: If you had a hang nail & a dibibuxialain from the planet bored-fuck-sticks told you he/she/it/he-she-it would give you the optimum bus schedule to get from the 7-11 down your street to the stupid ass Wholesale Foods four blocks down the street where you can only get spirulina GM modified wheat free face slop would you take it?**
Well, that depends. How many guests am I entertaining? Do I already have enough for my own spirulina & wheat germ milkshake, or am I making enough to serve seven?
You should open a thread asking which people are tired of poll threads. The irony would be just intense.
p.s. what does having a hangnail have to with whether or not I’d like a bus schedule? Is it too far to walk, given the toe pain? :dubious:
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### Author:  [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)
#### Post date: [February 7, 2003, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424/13 "2003-02-07T14:50:34Z")
You missed the open tag
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### Author:  [@Spiff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiff)
#### Post date: [February 7, 2003, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424/14 "2003-02-07T17:27:55Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by SPOOFE \*
> \*\*Buncha sober lightweights that don’t know the difference between a Smirnoff Ice and Bacardi 151… \*\*
Bacardi 151 mixed with Smirnoff Ice, now that’s a **DRINK!**
I should know, I’ve tried it. :eek:
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### Author:  [@ultrafilter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultrafilter)
#### Post date: [February 7, 2003, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424/15 "2003-02-07T18:55:38Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Spiff \*
> \*\*Bacardi 151 mixed with Smirnoff Ice, now that’s a **DRINK!**
>
> I should know, I’ve tried it. :eek: \*\*
Nah, it’s not a **DRINK!** until you’re using the 151 to water it down.
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### Author:  [@I\_can\_t\_believe\_that\_s\_butter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_can_t_believe_that_s_butter)
#### Post date: [February 7, 2003, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424/16 "2003-02-07T18:57:11Z")
> [@](#):
>
> _Ethilrist rightly points out:_
> **You should open a thread asking which people are tired of poll threads. The irony would be just intense.**
Isn’t that what he already did? He seems to be fighting with his own hated medium.
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### Author:  [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)
#### Post date: [February 7, 2003, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424/17 "2003-02-07T19:05:13Z")
I’m just here to take the ‘p’ out of this thread’s title.
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### Author:  [@ultrafilter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultrafilter)
#### Post date: [February 7, 2003, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424/18 "2003-02-07T19:11:39Z")
See, it could’ve been ‘stupid’, or it could’ve been ‘squid’. The world may never know.
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### Author:  [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)
#### Post date: [February 7, 2003, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424/19 "2003-02-07T19:13:46Z")
**Ultra** you squid fucker you! 😃
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### Author:  [@Swampwolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Swampwolf)
#### Post date: [February 7, 2003, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-ask-the-three-eyed-stuid-fucking-asshole/153424/20 "2003-02-07T19:24:59Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by E-Sabbath \*
> \*\*My god. A planet where radioactive fish evolved from man! \*\*
[Charlton Heston]
Getcher stinkin’ fins off me, you damn dirty fish!
[/CH]
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