# Poll for the single women.

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-for-the-single-women/502239>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [July 7, 2009, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-for-the-single-women/502239 "2009-07-07T19:50:36Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 12\
**Page:** 3

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**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\
**Post date:** [July 9, 2009, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-for-the-single-women/502239/41 "2009-07-09T05:17:32Z")

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I’m happy and your eyes happen to be whereabouts of the place I was looking at.

The smile has nothing to do with the guy; the meeting of eyes is random. But then, I’m not looking.

I do look at guys I find attractive, but it’s an aesthetic appreciation thing: like I said, I’m not looking. I’m more likely to stare openly at a sports car than at a guy, since the car isn’t going to get me in trouble (either think I’m coming on to him, be offended, or have a SO within reach who does get offended).

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**Author:** ![Baby\_Driver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@Baby\_Driver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baby_Driver)\
**Post date:** [July 9, 2009, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-for-the-single-women/502239/42 "2009-07-09T14:55:45Z")

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> [@Fretful\_Porpentine](#):
>
> I never smile and make eye contact with strangers. This may be _why_ I’m single ☹

Try it sometime, just for the kicks! For me, it’s a little like play-acting. I’m generally pretty reserved, but if it’s a sunny day and I’m feeling cute, sometimes I’ll tell myself, “Today if I notice an attractive guy, I’ll give him a cheeky grin and raise an eyebrow. I won’t know what the hell to do if he actually comes over, but we’ll save that part for later.”

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**Author:** ![DianaG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7ab992/32.png) [@DianaG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DianaG)\
**Post date:** [July 9, 2009, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-for-the-single-women/502239/43 "2009-07-09T15:02:15Z")

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Assuming you’re single, if he comes over, you continue smiling, make small talk, hopefully dazzle him with your wit, and maybe play with your hair a little, until one of the other of you has asked for a phone number. Then you exchange numbers, excuse yourself, and throw him another over-the-shoulder smile as you leave. He may call, he may not. But that was fun!

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**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\
**Post date:** [July 9, 2009, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-for-the-single-women/502239/44 "2009-07-09T15:52:52Z")

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I’m not single but B, which is why I try not to do it because most guys will assume it’s A… and once a guy has decided to approach you (sigh) there’s no getting him to go away without having to be uncomfortably blunt.

Quick story: There’s this guy I pass by on my way to work, and he stares at me _every single day_. Originally I thought it was kind of weird, but then figured what’s even weirder is trying so hard not to encourage him that I’m deliberately avoiding eye contact, and crossing the street in weird places, etc, so I decided to flash him a smile and things suddenly felt a lot less awkward. The bad news is he now feels it’s okay to talk to me, the good news is I’m always walking by so it’s never more than a quick “Hello,” or “God, I hate Mondays.”

One last thing: It was B when I was single too.

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**Author:** ![ladyfoxfyre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ad7895/32.png) [@ladyfoxfyre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ladyfoxfyre)\
**Post date:** [July 9, 2009, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-for-the-single-women/502239/45 "2009-07-09T21:13:18Z")

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> [@cher3](#):
>
> I’m finished eating and I’d like you to bring me the check.

I’m finished eating and I’d like you to _pay_ for the check?  
Usually it’s b.

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**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2009, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-for-the-single-women/502239/46 "2009-07-10T03:23:50Z")

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Auxiliary Question: If all the guys on the whole freaking planet started assuming the answer was “B” would that in any way cramp your style as far as actually finding guys to hook up, or would it be a most welcome relief and a great freedom?

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**Author:** ![Renee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/renee/32/287_2.png) [@Renee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Renee)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2009, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-for-the-single-women/502239/47 "2009-07-10T05:41:54Z")

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I’m not single, but B. I smile at just about anyone I make eye contact with, because it feels rude to be caught looking at someone and not smile. It does seem to occasionally be construed as a come on, but if that happens I just blow it off and continue on my friendly way.

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**Author:** ![Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@Sleeps\_With\_Butterflies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sleeps_With_Butterflies)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2009, 5:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-for-the-single-women/502239/48 "2009-07-10T05:47:27Z")

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> [@AHunter3](#):
>
> Auxiliary Question: If all the guys on the whole freaking planet started assuming the answer was “B” would that in any way cramp your style as far as actually finding guys to hook up, or would it be a most welcome relief and a great freedom?

Sweet freedom!

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**Author:** ![Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hilarity_n.suze/32/6223_2.png) [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hilarity_N.Suze)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2009, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-for-the-single-women/502239/49 "2009-07-10T05:48:56Z")

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Not single, but I was once. Other. Something like, “It’s a nice day and I feel good” or something of that ilk. Or else, “I’ve suffered for these teeth. Now it’s your turn.”

But not a lot of thought behind it, really.

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**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2009, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-for-the-single-women/502239/50 "2009-07-10T13:34:35Z")

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> [@AHunter3](#):
>
> Auxiliary Question: If all the guys on the whole freaking planet started assuming the answer was “B” would that in any way cramp your style as far as actually finding guys to hook up, or would it be a most welcome relief and a great freedom?

Relief! No, that’s not enough exclamation points. Relief!!! (!!!)

There is no style to be cramped for women finding men. We go up to them and speak, and they’re happy. Done.

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**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\
**Post date:** [July 10, 2009, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-for-the-single-women/502239/51 "2009-07-10T17:48:50Z")

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Sure works for me.

I’m always having folks tell me “Oh, but those women expect YOU, the GUY, to take the hint and act on it”. And I say “If they’re interested in me like that, they’ll do something to make sure I know. What they don’t need is for me to make a nuisance of myself just because they smiled in my direction or something, yeesh!”

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**Author:** ![Cyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a88e4f/32.png) [@Cyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cyn)\
**Post date:** [July 11, 2009, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-for-the-single-women/502239/52 "2009-07-11T19:23:18Z")

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> [@Agent\_Foxtrot](#):
>
> Women, what are you thinking when you smile at and make eye contact with a man in a public place? Is it:
> 
> [LIST=a]  
> [li]"You’re cute, and I’m available. I wouldn’t mind if you approached me.[/li][li]I’m a friendly person and I’m simply being warm to a stranger.[/li][li]Something else? (Please specify.)[/li][/LIST]

Mostly a mixture of A and B. I’m not available, but you’re still cute.

As for the auxiliary question; I don’t see men seeing me as merely friendly being a barrier to me hooking up. I want him, I’ll let him know I’m not just being polite.

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