# Poll: Have you ever masturbated at work?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [May 22, 2010, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371 "2010-05-22T15:28:40Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)
#### Post date: [May 22, 2010, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/1 "2010-05-22T15:28:40Z")
So, I was reading a short story a few days ago, and the male main character gets so worked up at work that he goes into the men’s room and rubs one out. The thing that struck me as strange about this was the tone - not only was it implied that it wasn’t unusual for the character to do this, it also had the air about it that it’s something people just do…
So?
Two things before you vote: a. in regards to yourself, solo activities only, since fooling around with someone else at work is a whole different thing. b. as for what you know about others, self-reporting by them, or other evidence, okay? not just assumptions because s/he seems the type.
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### Author:  [@Rushgeekgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rushgeekgirl)
#### Post date: [May 22, 2010, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/2 "2010-05-22T15:59:31Z")
I can’t even imagine getting in the mood in any place I’ve ever worked.
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### Author:  [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Attack_from_the_3rd_dimension)
#### Post date: [May 22, 2010, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/3 "2010-05-22T16:01:18Z")
Does my old boss qualify? We documented that he would lock himself in his office and download tranny porn.
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### Author:  [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)
#### Post date: [May 22, 2010, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/4 "2010-05-22T16:04:16Z")
It would never even occur to me. Okay, maybe it would occur to me, but I would never do that.
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### Author:  [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)
#### Post date: [May 22, 2010, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/5 "2010-05-22T16:04:59Z")
Just last weekend my buddy admitted that he’s “christened” every office he’s ever worked in. And every long-haul flight too.
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### Author:  [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)
#### Post date: [May 22, 2010, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/6 "2010-05-22T16:10:33Z")
I’m posting from work! And yes, I’ve “posted” from work as well. Idle hands, and what not.
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### Author:  [@NinetyWt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinetyWt)
#### Post date: [May 22, 2010, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/7 "2010-05-22T16:12:11Z")
Oh HELL no. I make too much noise.
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### Author:  [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)
#### Post date: [May 22, 2010, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/8 "2010-05-22T16:12:53Z")
> [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](#):
>
> Does my old boss qualify? We documented that he would lock himself in his office and download tranny porn.
I don’t know. That’s one thing I don’t understand about (some) men and the reportedly widespread problem of porn viewed on work computers: is there any point of looking at something arousing and not…? So I don’t know if there are a lot of employees who’d answer yes to the poll, or just enjoy frustrating themselves during the work day.
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### Author:  [@Ostrya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ostrya)
#### Post date: [May 22, 2010, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/9 "2010-05-22T16:25:08Z")
The idea never occurred to me.
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### Author:  [@even\_sven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/even_sven)
#### Post date: [May 22, 2010, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/10 "2010-05-22T17:19:15Z")
There have been a few times I’ve slipped off to the bathroom to take care of things.
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### Author:  [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)
#### Post date: [May 22, 2010, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/11 "2010-05-22T17:27:32Z")
\*\*Have you ever masturbated at work? \*\*
Or better yet, at your desk?
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### Author:  [@Hockey\_Monkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hockey_Monkey)
#### Post date: [May 22, 2010, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/12 "2010-05-22T17:34:13Z")
pffft! I’ve had sex on the job.
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### Author:  [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)
#### Post date: [May 22, 2010, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/13 "2010-05-22T17:38:27Z")
Yes, it is much more common than you think even for females. I am male but I have known quite a few female coworkers who told me they did it too. I even had one very attractive (married) female coworker tell me that she got a little too hot during a one on one meeting and had to slip off to the ladies room to take care of things. She told gave me info about how the female side of that works. Somehow, I think she liked me a little but as with all things female related, I will never know. She did take me to a Red Sox game later in the week in April when it was still chilly and she seemed to be freezing the entire time. She went and bought a blanket and insisted that we both get under it and huddle closely to stay warm. I did my job as a male heater pretty well if I do seem so myself and had a good time watching my first major league baseball game. I wonder what what ever happened to her. We could probably be friends.
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### Author:  [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)
#### Post date: [May 22, 2010, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/14 "2010-05-22T17:48:01Z")
[No wanking in the office!](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VgO9DNQAUc8&feature=related) 😃
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### Author:  [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)
#### Post date: [May 22, 2010, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/15 "2010-05-22T17:58:39Z")
[Relevant thread where several people in fact said they did the deed](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=545996).
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### Author:  [@Superhal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superhal)
#### Post date: [May 22, 2010, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/16 "2010-05-22T17:59:03Z")
I’ve never had a work bathroom clean enough to even think about it.
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### Author:  [@BrotherCadfael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrotherCadfael)
#### Post date: [May 22, 2010, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/17 "2010-05-22T18:00:33Z")
> [@Shagnasty](#):
>
> I did my job as a male heater pretty well if I do seem so myself
Dipstick heater?
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### Author:  [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)
#### Post date: [May 22, 2010, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/18 "2010-05-22T18:06:38Z")
Well I work from home so…
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### Author:  [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)
#### Post date: [May 22, 2010, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/19 "2010-05-22T18:14:10Z")
> [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](#):
>
> Does my old boss qualify?
You masturbated your old boss? _What?_
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### Author:  [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)
#### Post date: [May 22, 2010, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/poll-have-you-ever-masturbated-at-work/540371/20 "2010-05-22T18:19:03Z")
Way back in the early 80s . . . one way of meeting other guys was to put an ad in the local gay paper. I had put my first ad in, and had a P.O. box for the replies. I stopped at the P.O. on my way to work, and there were three envelopes. Rather than opening them in public,I took them to work, and at the first opportunity, took them into the bathroom with me. I was so excited that 3 total strangers answered my ad, and their responses, 2 with photos, were . . . um . . . very stimulating.
I remember having to clean my shirt before returning to work.
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